Unarmed Jokes

Funniest Unarmed Short Jokes

Short unarmed jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The unarmed humour may include short unharmed jokes also.

1. My friend got arrested for shooting an unarmed black teen He was charged for impersonating a police officer.
2. Why would Donald Trump run into an active school shooting, even if unarmed? Because he knows one of his supporters would never shoot him
3. American kid: Mommy, what's a "Canadian"? Well, dear, that's an unarmed citizen with health insurance.
4. An amputee broke into my house last night and tried to steal my stuff Luckily he was unarmed
5. In the middle of a bank robbery, a guy with no arms walks right in and says Dont shoot. Im unarmed.
6. I heard a double amputee got arrested on weapons charges They must've gotten the wrong guy, he's definitely unarmed
7. A police officer shoots and kills an unarmed civilian The officer is immediately arrested and eventually found guilty
8. Why was I arrested for only 1 year with a $5,000 fine after killing an unarmed African-American man? On charges of "impersonating a police officer".
9. I'm afraid to be around unarmed black men. What if the police miss and shoot me by mistake?
10. A double amputee was brought in for questioning after a shooting at a local convenience store. Police released the man soon after they discovered he was unarmed.

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Unarmed One Liners

Which unarmed one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with unarmed? I can suggest the ones about armless man and bear arms.

1. Why couldn't the amputee rob the bank... Because he was unarmed
2. A patient broke out of an amputation clinic! Don't worry, hes unarmed
3. Why snakes can't rob a bank? Because they are unarmed
4. What do you call it when two men without arms get into a fight? Unarmed combat
5. What do you call an army of amputees? The unarmed forces
6. Why are amputees the easiest to subdue? They're always unarmed
7. Canadian Defenition Canadian (noun):
   An unarmed american with health insurance
8. Funny joke, I think. A robber who had no arms tried to rob me, good thing he was unarmed.
9. A man tries to punch a wood chipper He is unarmed.
10. What did the amputee say to the police officer? "Don't shoot, I'm unarmed!"
11. I had prepared for a battle of wits but I see you came unarmed.
12. Why did the limbless gladiator surrender? He was unarmed and defeated.
13. Why did Obi Wan not kill Anakin when he had the chance? Because Anakin was ... unarmed.
14. I don't engage in mental combat with the unarmed.
15. Be careful, they call me T-Rex! I'm unarmed and dangerous.

Hilarious Fun Unarmed Jokes That Will Have You Rolling with Laughter

What funny jokes about unarmed you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean unpaid jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make unarmed pranks.