Twins Identical Jokes
57 twins identical jokes and hilarious twins identical puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about twins identical that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Twins Identical Short Jokes
Short twins identical jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The twins identical humour may include short identical twins jokes also.
- Amal and Juan are identical twins. Their mom only carries one baby photo in her wallet. Because if you've seen Juan you've seen Amal.
- I failed my calculus exam because I was sitting between two identical twins. It was impossible to differentiate between them.
- There is a good chance you'll fail your calculus exam if you are sitting between identical twins. Because it's hard to differentiate between them.
- I failed my calculus exam because I was seated between two identical twins. I couldn't differentiate between them.
- My wife's identical twin sister is living with us till she finds a job I said to my friend
He asked do you know how to tell them apart ?
I remarked why should I ? - Amal and Juan are identical twins. Their mom only carries one baby photo because if you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal
- My identical twin brother and I were both arrested this weekend. But there was a mix-up during processing. Now we are finishing each other's sentences.
- A scientist couple had identical twins... They named one Peter and the other one Control Group.
- I found out today that I have an identical twin brother. I got very emotional when we finally met. I was beside myself.
- If you want to pass your calculus exam, don't sit in between two identical twins. It's very hard to differentiate between them.
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Twins Identical One Liners
Which twins identical one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with twins identical? I can suggest the ones about identical and twins.
- I just found out my wife has an identical twin I saw her on Tinder.
- What do you call Michael Bublé's identical twin brother? Michael Dublé! :D
- Did you hear about the blonde identical twins? They couldn't tell each other apart.
- What do identical stars do? Twin-kle
- What do you call Identical Twin Brothers who choose a life of crime? Cell Mates
- What does a drummer name their identical twin girls? Anna one, Anna two.
- Did you hear about the identical twin police officers? They were copies.
- If identical siblings are both interested in something, Do they have twin piques?
- Very few people know the scientific term for identical twins. Fetus Repeatus.
- Where did the identical twins go after they went crazy? The insame asylum
- How can you tell if a Chinese family had identical or paternal twins? You don't!
- What do you call a pair of identical twins who are stewardesses? Hostess Twinkies
- Identical Twins They're all the same these days
Rib-Tickling Twins Identical Jokes that Bring Friends Together
What funny jokes about twins identical you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean pair twins jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make twins identical pranks.
A woman gave her two sons to different families for adoption.
One goes to an Egyptian family and called Amal.
The second child goes to Spain and is called Juan.
Many years later, Juan sends his mother a photo of himself.
She turns to her sister saying that she wished that she had a photo of her other son.
The sister responded "Hey, they are identical twins. If you have seen Juan, you have seen Amal."
Mary and Sue are discussing good-looking boys in their high school.
Mary asks "Have you seen that new Mexican kid Amal Garcia?"
"Garcia?" Sue responds. "No, but I think I've seen his brother Juan"
Mary replies "They're identical twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal!"
The bell ringer at a church dies...
So they put out an ad for a new ringer, and on the first day a guy shows up for the job. He climbs the bell tower, and rather unexpectedly, he runs and jumps and hits the bell with his face. He continues to ring the bell this way for the rest of the time. The priest thinks it's weird but whatever, he lets him do his job. Within a couple of days, though, the man runs and jumps and misses the bell, falling to his death in front of the church. As the crowd gathers, someone asks "Who is that man?"
Someone else replies "I don't know, but his face sure rings a bell."
The next day the man's identical twin shows up to replace him as the bell ringer, and the priest hires him. He climbs to the top, runs, jumps, and misses the bell, falling to his death. Once again, the crowd gathers, and someone asks "Now, who was THAT guy?"
Someone else says "I don't know his name, but he's a dead ringer for his brother."
I was told this joke years ago, and I probably butchered it. The punchline still works, though.
Twins
Yesterday, I was hanging out with my girlfriend when her identical twin sister walked by. Then my girlfriend asked me, "Do you think my sister is pretty?"
Two identical twins separated at birth...
... And are put up for adoption. One of the twins gets adopted by a Mexican couple and is named Juan. The other twin gets adopted by an Egyptian family and is named Hamal.
Years later their biological mother and father receive a letter from both their children saying how through a bizarre series of coincidences they had found eachother and had tracked down their address. Enclosed was a picture of Juan smiling happily with his adoptive Mexican parents.
"Oh" the mother says to her husband. "he's so handsome! And seems so happy! I wish I knew what his brother looks like."
"Honey" said her husband "They're twins, once you've seen Juan, you've seen Hamal."
Hey, did you hear about the Mexican-Indian twins that just moved in next door?
They're identical too! Once you've seen Juan, you've seen Jamal.
I was at this bar once..
and the bartenders were identical twins. The only way to tell them apart was that one of the brothers had a freakishly small head. After talking for a while I finally asked him what was up with is appearance. He looks around, lowers his voice and says "once I was walking down a beach and found a lamp in the sand, I rubbed it and I'll be d**... if a smoking hot genie didn't shoot up out of the lamp. The genie offers me one wish, the only thing off-limits is that she would not sleep with me, so I asked for a little head"
I just found out my wife is pregnant with identical twin boys.
We decided to name them Pete and Repete.
Did you hear about the identical twins who robbed a bank?
After they were caught, they finished each other's sentences.
Know what's the best part about my supervisor having an identical twin?
I get to watch him die twice.
Tony was in court filing for divorce just few months after marriage
Tony married one of a pair of identical twins.
A few months later, he was in court filing for a divorce.
"Would you tell the court your reason for wanting a divorce," the judge said.
"Well, Your Honor," Tony began, "periodically my sister-in-law would come over
for a visit and because she and my wife are identical,
occasionally I'd end up making love to her by mistake."
"I understand they're identical twins, but surely there must be some difference
between the two women," said the judge.
"Precisely, Your Honor," replied Tony "That's why I want a divorce."
I've always had to live in the shadow of my identical twin.
He may have got the brains, but I like to think I got the looks
I once asked Dear Abby how to deal with my identical twin...
She replied "Forget that broad!"
A first place winner at the International Pun Contest
A woman has identical twins and is forced to give them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Ahmal." The other goes to a family in Spain; they name him Juan." Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother.
Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband responds, "They're identical twins!
If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal."
My neighbours have two sons - identical twins names Jamal and Juan.
If you've seen Juan, you've seen Jamal.
What do gender identities and the twin towers have in common?
...
There used to be two of them, and not everyone is REAL SENSITIVE about it
The twins
A woman delivers a set of identical twins and decides to give them up
for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Ahmal."
The other goes to a family in Spain ; they name him "Juan." Years later,
Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the
picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of
Ahmal. Her husband responds, "They're twins! If you've seen Juan, you've
seen Ahmal."
Did you know Juan the horse has a brother named jamal?
Nothing really special, they're identical twins.
If you've seen Juan, you've seen Jamal
My girlfriend broke up with me because I slept with her identical twin
In my defense, he looked exactly like her.
A husband and wife give up their identical twin boys for adoption. They name one of them Juan and the other Amol
Years later the wife receives a letter from Juan reaching out to her, he included a picture. Elated she showed her husband who was excited to see his son doing so well in life.. weeks later they receive a letter from Amol telling them how well he is doing and also included a picture. Wife asks hubby " do you want to see your sons picture?" hubby replies "Why? if you've seen Juan you've seen Amol"
Amal and Juan are identical twins. Their mom only carries a photo of one of them because…
…if you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal.
When you're telling a joke to identical twins, make sure you tell them the entire thing.
Because you just can't tell them a part.