Tss Jokes

What are some Tss jokes?

A goat, a drum, and a rattlesnake fall down a cliff...

ba dum tss

Popped a tire on a pot hole today

Badum tss

What do you call a person who lives in Sweden but isn't native?

An artificial swedener

Badum tss.

I made a joke about a midget criminal running down the stairs. The punchline is a little condescending.

Ba dum *tss*

Why can't your nose be 12 inches long?

Because then it'd be a foot.

~*Badum tss*~

I fed my chickens a chicken wing...

I guess you could say they enjoyed themselves. *ba dum tss*

"How much would you say you read the Bible?"

"Well, I don't read it religiously."

Bud-dum tss, I hate myself.

What do you call a fly when it retires?

A flew.


No? Alright.. I'll see myself out.

Why shouldn't you give Muslim Women drugs?

They'll get stoned. (Ba-dum tss)

Have you heard about that new movie Constipation?

Oh wait - it hasn't come out yet!

*ba dum tss*

The Two Nuns and the Blind man.

There were once two nuns taking a bath together when all of a sudden they hear a knock at the door.
"Who is it?" yells out one of the nuns.
"It's me, the blind man." replies the man at the door.
"Ok, come on up." calls the second nun.
A short moment later, they heard the footsteps up the staircase and soon the door to the bathroom opened.
"Oh, hello Sisters. I like your new towels. Now where do you want the blinds?"
Bu dum tss

Two Snare drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff

buh dum tss

How do you email a sandwich?

In bytes.

*Ba dum tss*

What law do most mathematicians break?

...They drink and derive.

*Baddum tss*

Thank you, thank you! I'll see myself out.

How does a nucleus get out of prison?

Through the cell wall.

*Badum tss* :D

After eating four cans of alphabet soup

I had a huge vowel movement.


How did Michael Jackson pick his nose?

From a catalogue.

ba dum tss

Two drums and a cymbal jump off a cliff...

Ba dum tss.

two toms and a hi-hat fall off a cliff...

bu-dum tss

"My new band's name is 1023 MB"

"Awesome! When are you guys playing?"

"I don't know. We don't have a gig yet."

Ba Dum Tss...

Why did the priest go to the gym?

To exorcise.

^(ba dum tss)

What is President Obama's favorite genre of music?

Barack 'n Roll.

Ba dum tss.

The musical doctor

Man: Doctor Doctor I need a cure for my depression.

Doctor: Music is great therapy, here, I'll loan you my old guitar, it's broken but you should get some use out of it.

Man: Hang on, why would you lend me your guitar just like that? Is there some sort of hidden clause in this?

Doctor: Don't worry, there's no strings attached.

ba dum tss.

What do you call pasta with ketchup?

Ba-dum tss.


Worker > ,What's your emergency?

Man > My wife is going to give birth!

Worker > Is this her first born?

Man > No,it's her husband

*Ba Dum Tss*

What do you call a gay booger?


*ba-dum tss*

What's Shrek's favorite shape?

A shrek-tangle! *ba-dum tss*

What's shadier than a young tree?


*Ba-dum tss*

What is the most affectionate type of chicken?

The tender ones (Badum Tss)

A man walks into a bar with a piece of green tarmac on his head...

The landlord says to the rest of the customers:

"Don't talk to him! He's a **cycle path**!"

Ba Dum Tss!

Bad religious joke I created.

One day Jesus is talking to god and says,

"Hey dad, guess what I did today?"

God: "What?"

Jesus: "I walked on water."

God: "No way."

Jesus: "Yahweh!"

Badum, tss

Urology joke I made up today

What does the the urologist say to the accepted internship applicant?

Ur-ine dadum tss

How do you introduce a hamburger?

Meet patty... badum tss

What do you call Charles Manson's music?

A *cult* classic.


What type of college does planets go to?


Ba Dum Tss

What does a mentally disabled lizard said to be diagnosed with?

A Reptile Dysfunction

*ba dum tss*

I'll be here all night folks

Three elephants are standing on a cliff. All three fall of the cliff. Two fall on land, one falls in the water.

Ba-dum tss.

What did the heart say after witnessing someone receive a massive burn?

Ba dum tss.

How do you greet a slice of bread in Germany?

Gluten tag! Ba-dum tss.

What do you call a reptile wearing a vest?

An investigator. Ba dum tss.

What do you call it when a bee proposes to a bee queen?

A BEEtrohal!
ba dum tss....

What do the Titanic and sixth sense have in common?

They both have that sinking feeling
(*Bu dum tss*)

I wanted to gift my brother a drum set...

...but I decided to keep it for myself. **badum tss**

What is the difference between man-eating and cannibalism?

If a dog eats a man, it's man-eating
If a dog eats a dog. it's cannibalism
If a man eats a dog, it's Vietnamese traditional food.
Ba Dum Tss

What is the opposite of minimum?

Minidad. *ba dum tss*

Which pizza shop is losing money due to business "falling"?

Dominoes (Basin Tss)

How to make Tss jokes?

We have collected gags and puns about Tss to have fun with. Do you want to stand out in a crowd with a good sense of humour joking about Tss? If Yes here are a lot more hilarious lines and funny Tss pick up lines to share with friends.

Joko Jokes