Trooper Jokes
73 trooper jokes and hilarious trooper puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about trooper that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
This article has it all: funny jokes about the Storm Trooper, Clone Trooper, Super Trooper, Sergeant, and Officer. Laugh out loud with these hilarious trooper jokes!
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Funniest Trooper Short Jokes
Short trooper jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The trooper humour may include short soldier jokes also.
- TIL the movie Starship Troopers was never adapted into a successful video game because... ...bugs.
- Why are storm troopers so clingy? Cause no matter where you're at they'll always miss you.
- I think Chris Brown should be a storm trooper in the next Star Wars. Maybe he can actually hit somebody.
- A Georgia State Trooper pulls over a car. He says... ...to the driver, "Got any ID?"
The driver says, "'Bout what?" - I saw a Battle Droid push a foul-mouthed clone trooper off a cliff.... ...he was arrested for making an obscene clone fall.
- Why did the storm trooper return his iPhone? Because it wasn't the droid he was looking for!
- What's the difference between a Stormtrooper and a Zoo Keeper? The Storm Trooper would have missed harambe
- What do Storm Troopers and Bone Thugs N Harmony have in common? They are both going to miss every body.
- Why do photographers never dress as Storm troopers? Because they actually want to get a good shot.
- My wife told me she thought the clone troopers were kinda hot I told her she might have a Fettish.
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Trooper One Liners
Which trooper one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with trooper? I can suggest the ones about troops and officer.
- A depressed Storm Trooper goes to the bar for some jager shots. He goes home sober.
- Quarantined Star Wars troopers be like "I miss people" First off all, you always miss.
- Why do Storm Troopers like churchs? Cuz of all the pews.
I hate myself - What did the clone troopers say after they killed Aayla Secura? Bye Felucia
- Sometimes I wish storm troopers were chasing me. Then someone would miss me
- Storm troopers makes great drivers! They never hit anything!
- So why can't Storm Troopers get a date? They keep missing all the signs...
- What do you call a zombie Storm Trooper? An Imperial Walker
- I should marry a storm trooper. They will always miss me.
- What's a storm trooper's favorite date? March 4th
- What's do you call a stormtrooper that smells good? A cologne trooper...
- Why are storm troopers so easy for Jedi to manipulate? They are all jar-jarheads
- Why did the Sand Trooper go to the library? He had a book dewback.
- What is the safest place in the galaxy? In the direct line of fire of a Storm Trooper.
- Why was the storm trooper such a good dad? He could never hit his kids.
State Trooper Jokes
Here is a list of funny state trooper jokes and even better state trooper puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- It's like the weather saw a state trooper It went from 90 to 45 real quick
- State trooper pulls a car over... then shoots at the occupant
Storm Trooper Jokes
Here is a list of funny storm trooper jokes and even better storm trooper puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- What happens in a battle between storm troopers and red shirts? (Star Trek) The storm troopers all miss, and the red shirts all die
- When a storm trooper wants to avoid conflict, he travels like electric current... Down the path of least resistance.
- What rock band was popular among storm-troopers? Panic! AT-AT the disco
- I'm planning to name my project team - Storm Troopers We always keep missing the target... (yea, original, yea,qualifies as a dad joke)
- Whats the similarity between a storm trooper and a baseball coach? Both can fire, neither can hit.
- A droid, a ressistance fighter and a storm trooper walk/role into a bar.
- A storm trooper has only one rule Whatever you do, don't hit the target
- What don't Storm Troopers have any kids? Because they always miss the target.
- Why do storm trooper bathrooms always have puddles? They always miss!
- Why did the Storm Troopers let the Jedi pass? Because they were 'Forced' to.
Uproarious Trooper Jokes to Have a Laugh Out Loud Good Time
What funny jokes about trooper you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean policeman jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make trooper pranks.
It's a miracle!
An Irish priest is driving down to New York and gets stopped for speeding in Connecticut.
The state trooper smells alcohol on the priest's breath and then sees an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car. He says, "Sir, have you been drinking?"
"Just water," says the priest.
The trooper says, "Then why do I smell wine?"
The priest looks at the bottle and says,
"Good Lord! He's done it again!"
A Trooper tries to pull over this guy...
When he just speeds up and a chase ensues, when the trooper finally manages to pull him over, he asks him "didn't you see me trying to pull you over? Why did you take off?" To which the guy responds "sir, a while back my wife ran off with a trooper & I was afraid you're bringing her back"....
A Jumper
On January 9 a group of Pekin IL , bikers were riding west on I-74 when they saw a girl about to jump off a Peoria bridge, so they stopped.
The Harley leader, George a big burly man of 53, gets off his bike, walks through the gawkers, past the State Trooper, and says, "What are you doing?"
"I'm going to commit s**...," she says.
While he didn't want to appear "sensitive," he didn't want to miss a be-a-legend opportunity either so he asked ... "Well, before you jump, why don't you give me a kiss?"
So, with no hesitation at all, she leaned back over the railing and did just that ... and it was a long, deep, lingering kiss followed immediately by another one.
After she's finished, George gets approval from his group, the onlookers, and even the State Trooper, then says,
"Wow! That was the best kiss I have ever had, Honey! That's a real talent you are wasting, Sugar Shorts. You could be famous if you rode with me. Why are you committing s**...?"
"My parents don't like me dressing up like a girl".
The onlookers are still unclear whether she jumped or was pushed!
The state trooper is driving down the highway when...
he sees a truck driver pull over, walk to the side of his truck with a tire jack, bang on the side of the truck several times, and then drive away. Two miles down the road he does the same thing. Another two miles, same thing. The trooper pulls the truck over and asks the truck driver to explain and the driver says "The load limit is ten tons, and I'm carrying fifteen tons of parakeets, so I've got to keep some of them flying around."
A California state trooper pulled over a driver who ran a stop sign.
"C'mon, Officer. I slowed down, didn't I?" argued the driver.
"But you must come to a complete stop at the sign," said the trooper.
"'Stop.' 'Slow down.' What's the difference, really?" quibbled the driver.
The cop was so irritated that he whipped out his billy club and started hitting the man's arm with it, shouting, "Well, do you want me to stop or slow down?!"
A man in Texas is driving with twenty penguins in the bed of his pickup…
…when he is stopped by a State Trooper. The trooper approaches and tells the man that he needs to take the penguins to the zoo immediately as they are non-native and not registered to the man as pets. Right away, officer, replies the man, and off he goes.
The following day, the same man is driving on the same road with the same twenty penguins in the bed of his truck. This time, however, the penguins are all wearing sunglasses and straw hats. Sure enough, the man is stopped by the same officer. After pulling the man over, the officer approaches.
What is the meaning of this? I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo yesterday, why are they still in the bed of your truck? Did you really think these disguises would fool me?
They're not disguises, officer, you see I DID take them to the zoo yesterday—in fact, we had so much fun, we're going to the beach today.
Watch Out For That Tree
A state trooper pulls over a car on a lonely back road and approaches the driver. "Sir, is there a reason you're weaving all over the road?"
The driver replies, "Oh officer, thank goodness you're here! I almost had an accident. I looked up and there was a tree right in front of me. I swerved to the left and there was another tree in front of me. I swerved to the right and there was another tree in front of me!"
Reaching through the side window to the rearview mirror, the officer says, "Sir, that's your air freshener."
A man is pulled over speeding..
the State Trooper walks up to the driver's window and asks the driver "do you know why I pulled you over?" "Yes" the man says, "I was speeding." "Why were you speeding?" the Trooper asks.
"My ex-wife left me for a Trooper, and I thought maybe you were him, trying to bring her back!"
A state trooper knocks on Mr. Smith's door...
"Mr. Smith," The officer goes on, "as you know, we have been searching for your missing wife for the last 10 days. We've put our best men and our most advanced resources into the search. The governor is going to call a press conference this evening to call off the search. I'm here to tell you that you should prepare for the worst."
So, Mr. Smith says, "alright, but you've gotta drive me to Goodwill to buy everything back!"
A state trooper lays in wait at a speed trap...
and spots a speeder.
He flashes his lights, pulls the car over, walks up to the driver and says, "I've been waiting for you all day."
The driver responds, "I got here as fast as I could."
A state trooper pulls over a priest
A state trooper pulls over a priest. The state trooper smells alcohol on the priest's breath and then sees an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car. He says, "Sir, have you been drinking?" "Just water," says the priest. The trooper says, "Then why do I smell wine?" The priest looks at the bottle and says, "Good Lord! He's done it again!"
Trooper tries to pull over a man who speeds away.....
After getting the man to pull over, he tells him that since it's the end of his shift that he'll let him go if he has a good explanation for why he kept speeding up instead of pulling over.
The driver says: "Don't you recognize me? My wife ran away with you 2 years ago and I thought you were trying to give her back"
A man gets pulled over for speeding...
The office saunters up to his car and he rolls down the window.
"I've heard every excuse for speeding in the book. I bet you can't give me one I haven't heard. But if you do, I'll let you off with a warning."
The man replies.
"Well you see officer, few years back my wife went and ran off with a state trooper."
"What does that have to do with anything?"
"Well, when I saw your lights turn on I was afraid you fellas was coming to give her back!"
A man is pulled over at 2am by a state trooper
State trooper: Hey, where you headed at 2 am sir?
Elderly man: I'm just on my way to hear a lecture about the dangers of drinking and staying out late and smoking m**... with friends who are a bad influence.
State Trooper: Really? Who's giving that kind of lecture at 2 in the morning?
Elderly man: That would be my wife, officer.
Two Alabama State Troopers
Two Alabama state troopers were chasing a Mustang on I-20 East towards Georgia. When the suspect crossed the state line, the first trooper pulled over quickly.
The rookie trooper parked behind him and asked, "Hey, Sarge, why'd you stop?"
The sergeant replied, "Ah, he's in Georgia now. They're an hour ahead of us, so we ain't ever gonna catch him."
A man is driving down the highway when a State Trooper appears at his bumper and turns on his lights ...
The man starts to speed up a little and realizes the trooper is still following him. He changes lanes and the trooper is still following him. The man then proceeds to floor it as fast as his car could go.
After about a 30 minute chase, the man runs out of gas and the State Trooper approaches his window. The man, who is older and has his hands up, appears to be shaking.
The State Trooper says, Sir, why wouldn't you pull over?
The man says, well, about 15 years ago, my wife ran off with a State Trooper ... I ran because I thought you were bringing her back.
A man gets pulled over for speeding
When the officer approaches his vehicle he tells the man "sir, it's been a long day, and I'm ready to go home. If you can give me a good reason as to why you were speeding I might let you go without a ticket."
The man looks at him and says "well officer, years ago my wife left me for a state trooper, and when I saw you coming for me, I thought you were bringing her back.
Officer says "Have a nice day sir"
When interacting with police follow their instructions carefully
Me: [hears knock on door] "Who is it?"
Trooper: "State Police identify yourself."
Me: "Police identify yourself"
Trooper: "State Police"
Me: "Police"
What did the Storm Trooper say when he f**... in church?
"Pew, pew."
A state trooper pulls over a elderly lady
The state trooper approaches the car, and asks the elderly lady if she knows why he pulled her over. The elderly lady said of course i do, you wanted to give me a personal invitation to the state troopers ball the state trooper replied uh ma'am. State troopers dont have b**.... He stood there for a second, tipped his hat, and walked back to his car.
It's 3 in the morning and an elderly Jewish man is flying down the highway at 105 mph. A state trooper pulls him over.
"Where in the h**... are you racing to at this hour?"
"To a lecture, officer."
"Who gives a lecture at 3 a.m.?"
"My wife."
A priest is driving down to New York and gets stopped for speeding in Connecticut
The state trooper smells alcohol on the priest's breath and then sees an empty wine bottle on the floor of the car.He says, "Sir, have you been drinking?""Just water," says the priest. The trooper says, "Then why do I smell wine?"The priest looks at the bottle and says, "Good Lord! He's done it again
A state trooper is sitting at the end of a tunnel and pulls over a motorist for speeding.
License and registration the officer says.
No problem replies the motorist.
What are you doing out so late sir? the officer asks.
Just had a late night at work he replies.
Really? What do you do for work? the officer says.
Well...I'm an a**... stretcher he says.
An a**... stretcher?
Yeah, I take a**... and stretch them as far as you want, up to 6 feet
What would anyone do with a six foot a**...?! The office exclaims.
Well, the state gives them a car and puts one at the end of a tunnel!
A state trooper pulled along side a speeding driver and is shocked when he sees a elderly woman behind the wheel knitting.
The trooper rolled down the window and yelled, "Pull Over!"
"No!" yelled the woman, "It's a cardigan!"
A state trooper pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway
Glancing at the car he was astounded to see that the elderly woman behind the wheel was knitting
The trooper crank down his window and yelled to the driver pull over
No! yelled the woman it's a cardigan
A young woman was pulled over for speeding
A state trooper walked to her car window, floppong open his ticket book.
The woman said: I bet you are going to try to sell me a ticket to the troopers' ball.
He replied: State troopers don't have b**....
There was a brief silence. He closed his ticket book, tipped his hat, got back in his patrol car and left.
A state trooper pulls a man over for speeding.
The officer tells the man, If you can give me an excuse I've never heard before I'll let you go.
The man says to the officer, A few years ago my wife ran off with a state trooper and I thought you were him trying to bring her back to me.
The officer replied, Slow it down and have a nice day.
A young woman was pulled over for speeding
A young woman was pulled over for speeding.
The State Trooper walked to her car window and opened his ticket book.
The woman said, "I bet you're going to try to sell me a ticket to the State Troopers' Ball."
The trooper told her, "Ma'am, State Troopers don't have b**...."
There was a moment of silence... The trooper tipped his hat, and returned to his car.
I got pulled over by a state trooper the other day.
Trooper: Your license states that you're required to wear corrective lenses. Where are your glasses?
Me: It's ok. I've got contacts.
Trooper: Listen pal, I don't care who you know!
50 Jokes for 50 US States Part IV
# Arkansas
An Arkansas state trooper pulls over a pickup truck on 1-40.
He says to the driver, "Got any ID?"
The driver asks, " 'Bout what?"
Disclaimer: This is not my joke. And I sure hope that its not a repost from any of the subs. I am sure that there will be numerous variations out there. So just wanted to let you know that I read it on Reader's Digest Issue 1/09, finding it funny, I wanted to share with the jokers here.
Two Alabama State Troopers were chasing a Camaro East on I-20 toward Georgia.
When the suspect crossed the Georgia line, the first Trooper pulled over quickly.
The rookie Trooper pulled in behind him and said, "Hey, sarge, why did you stop?"
The sarge replied, "He's in Georgia now. They're an hour ahead of us, so we'll never catch him.
