Tripping Jokes
101 tripping jokes and hilarious tripping puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about tripping that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
This article is full of hilarious tripping jokes that will have you rolling on the floor laughing.
Quick Jump To
Funniest Tripping Short Jokes
Short tripping jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The tripping humour may include short tripped jokes also.
- I walked down a street where the houses were numbered 64K, 128K, 256K, 512K and 1MB That was a trip down memory lane
- I bought a pair of shoes from a drug dealer I have no idea what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day.
- Twenty years ago, my friend made a website where you compare getting high from different drugs. It was the original trip advisor.
- A German was going to a trip in France... He reached passport control and the officer asked:
"Name?"
"Hans Kleiner"
"Age?"
"31"
"Occupation?"
"No no, just visiting" - Today I saw a poor, old woman trip and fall. At least, I assume she was poor. She only had $4.75 in her purse.
- This is a bit wordy… I accidentally swallowed some scrabble tiles, and now I'm experiencing some unexpected vowel movements. The next trip to the bathroom could spell disaster.
- I wish my girlfriend wasn't so obsessed about her breast size. Even a trip to the car dealership became embarrassing. She told the guy she wanted something that'll get her from A to B.
- A drug dealer sold me his shoes today I don't know what he laced them with but I was tripping all day
- Liz Cheney will agree to dismantle the January 6 Commission under one condition That is if Donald Trump can go on a hunting trip with her Dad.
- My mum tripped and dropped the basket of clothes she'd just ironed. It may sound far-fetched but it's true. I watched it all unfold.
Share These Tripping Jokes With Friends
Tripping One Liners
Which tripping one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with tripping? I can suggest the ones about trips and tripped fell.
- Tripped over my friends bra... ..she is always setting booby traps!
- "I see", said the blind carpenter As he tripped over his hammer and saw
- I walked into my sister's room and tripped on a bra. It was a booby-trap.
- How do you get ready for a trip around the Sun?
Planet - I went on a trip to Chernobyl last week It was rad
- I didn't fall for my boyfriend His third leg just tripped me
- Yo mama so fat... When she tripped, I didn't laugh, but the ground was cracking up
- I tripped in France Eiffel over
- I rolled my first joint last night! Today I have an ankle the size of a football. :(
- What did the French man say when he tripped down the stairs? Eiffel.
- The dumpling took a trip to Spain and came back feeling empanada.
- I tripped on a bra… It was a booby trap
- Yo mama so dumb, she tripped over the wireless network.
- Don't walk through a field of mushrooms It's quite a tripping hazard.
- Did you hear about M.C. Escher? Poor guy tripped and fell up the stairs
Tripping And Falling Jokes
Here is a list of funny tripping and falling jokes and even better tripping and falling puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why did the drug addict fall over? He tripped.
- Who discovered Victoria Falls? Whoever tripped her.
- A giraffe walks into a bar... The giraffe trips and falls over, the bartender says, "what's that lyin over there." And someone replies, "that's not a lion, that's a giraffe."
- Sweetheart, I didn't just fall for you. I fell because of you.
Stop tripping me. - A man proudly sporting an I Love Trump pin passes a liberal man on the sidewalk. As he does so, he trips and falls. Oh my god! Exclaims the liberal, Are you alt-right?
- Two photographers are walking down a street. One of them trips and fall onto the ground.
The second one immediately falls down next to him and says: Excellent angle! What are we shooting? - What did the horse say when he tripped? Help! I've fallen and I can't giddy-up.
- What happens when Niagara trips? Niagara Falls
- Models Why did the models keep tripping on the runway?
They were showing off the fall lineup. Badumtss - a bad comedian trips and falls and he shouts "help, I've fallen and can't do stand up!"
Tripping Beard Jokes
Here is a list of funny tripping beard jokes and even better tripping beard puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Jesus goes to a barbershop. Would you like us to trim your beard? they ask Jesus says No, I wouldn't want to make your floor a tripping hazard.
Tripping Over Jokes
Here is a list of funny tripping over jokes and even better tripping over puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- So my drug dealer got me these new shoes.. And I don't know what he laced them with.. But I've been tripping all day
- We, the taxpayers, keep paying to send Trump on very expensive trips overseas. It might be worth it too, except he keeps coming back.
- It makes my heart race when my GF puts her head in my lap during long road trips So now I only let her do it when it's my turn to drive
- I got drunk last night and swallowed some scrabble tiles Next trip to the toilet could spell disaster..
- So I just got back from a trip in Germany, and I realized how awful American children are. While they may be nice and all where I live in NYC, kids in Germany are kinder.
- I have 100% solid proof that masks don't work! My wife went on a business trip and on the plane they made her wear a mask -- and now she has chlamydia!
- My drug dealer got me shoes for Christmas I dont know what they were laced with, but I've been tripping ever since
- Trump cancelled his trip to Britain because he doesn't want to go anywhere he doesn't feel welcome... So what's he still doing in the white house?
- My wife just tripped and dropped a basket full of freshly ironed clothes. I just sat back and watched it all unfold.
- I bought shoes from a drug dealer once… I'm not sure what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day.
Charming Humor Tripping Jokes with Loads of Fun
What funny jokes about tripping you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean slipping jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make tripping pranks.
Two conjoined twins walks into a pub
The bartender is amazed: "You're not from around here"
The siamese on the left side:"No, we're french, every summer, we come to the UK, rent a car and start a road trip"
"So, you really seem to like the country?"
"Not that much, but once a year, my brother can drive".
I hate going through airport security...
For some reason I'm always stopped at the metal detector, even if i'm carrying NOTHING! So as you can imagine, on my latest trip, when I successfully got past the metal detector I was so pleased that I whispered "YES" to myself. As you can imagine, that didn't go down too well.
As migration approached, two elderly vultures
As migration approached, two elderly vultures doubted they could make the trip south, so they decided to go by airplane.
When they checked their baggage, the attendant noticed that they were carrying two dead raccoons. "Do you wish to check the raccoons through as luggage?" she asked.
"No, thanks," replied the vultures. "They're carrion."
A husband and Wife from the States visit the Holy Land...
During the trip the wife tragically dies. A f**... director in Israel tells the husband that she can be buried in the holy land for $500, or shipped back to the US for $4000. The husband immediately says, "Let's ship her back to the states." The f**... director asks why, when it's so much cheaper to bury her her. Husband says "Someone else came back to life after 3 days being buried here before, I'd rather not take that chance."
What happened when the car took l**...?
It went on a road trip and had an auto body experience!
A woman and a man are lying in bed
A woman and a man are lying in bed next to each other when her phone rings.
She picks up, the man looks over at her and listens. She is speaking in a cheery voice, "Hi. I'm so glad you called. Really? That's wonderful. I'm so happy for you. That sounds terrifiic. Great! Thanks. Okay. Bye bye."
She hangs up and the man asks, "Who was that?"
"Oh," she replies, "that was my husband telling me about the great time he's having on his fishing trip with you."
I was expelled from school for m**... in the showers
The teachers said I ruined the trip to Auschwitz
Three guys go on a ski trip...
...they arrive at the hotel only to find out that there is only one room available, and it has only one bed. They have a great day skiing and then go to sleep. The next day, they wake up. The guy on the left says "I had a dream that this beautiful woman was giving me the best h**... of my life!" The guy on the right says "I had the same dream!" The guy in the middle says "I had a dream I was skiing!"
My blind friend just tried l**... for the first time...
There was more tripping than usual.
3 men go on a trip.....
They decided to just book just 1 room with 1 bed to save money.
After the first night, the man who slept on the right said, "I dreamed I was getting a h**... last night."
The man on the left said, " I dreamed about getting a h**... too! What a coincidence! "
The man in the middle said, "I dreamed I was skiing."
A man got lost on a camping trip
A man got lost on a camping trip. Rescuers scoured the wilderness until a medical emergency team finally spotted a solitary figure across a wide chasm.
Charlie Smith, someone shouted, is that you?
Yes, it is, came the reply. Who are you?
We're from the Red Cross.
I gave at the office! Charlie shouted back.
A rabbi and a priest...
take a group of kids on a spiritual trip to the Holy Land. During the flight, the pilot announces,
" The plane is going down, we only have two parachutes. I'm taking one. You guys figure out who gets the other one"
The priest says, " We should give it to one of the kids."
The rabbi grabs the c**... and says, " I have a life to live! F*c**... the kids! "
The priest thinks, and says,
"Do you think we have time?? "
Whata country..
You might remember comedian Yakov Smirnoff. When he first came to the United States from Russia he was not prepared for the incredible variety of instant products available in American grocery stores.
He says, "On my first shopping trip, I saw powdered milk -- you just add water, and you get milk. Then I saw powdered orange juice -- you just add water, and you get orange juice. And then I saw baby powder, and I thought to my self, "What a country!"
What do you get when you mix l**... and a birth control pill?
A trip without the kids
A man was out on a fishing trip
When suddenly, he dropped one of his oars into the water, frustrated that he couldn't get the boat moving, he decided to seek help.
He saw someone with two beautiful women on his boat who also had a spare oar. "Excuse me, may I borrow one of your oars?" he yelled.
The man appeared offended, "thems ain't 'ores, thems me sisters!"
Two women were fighting bitterly for the last seat on a bus...
The conductor tried to intervene but it was no use.
Finally, from up the front, the driver said, Just let the ugly one have it!
Both women remained standing for the rest of the trip.
Did you hear about the guy in 1981 that got l**... and l**... mixed up?
Instead of going on a trip, he went on a mission.
An American man meets a woman while on a business trip to Paris. She barely speaks any English, but their date goes well...
During s**..., she is moaning and basically screaming C'est le mauvais trou . He is emboldened and confident, seeing how much he's pleasing her. Over and over again, C'est le mauvais trou!
The next day, he's playing golf with a client who hits an amazing hole in one. Eager to use his new compliment, the man says C'est le mauvais trou!
The client replies What the h**... do you mean that's the wrong hole?!
A woman has to go to Italy for a conference, so her husband drives her to the airport.
Thank you honey, she says, Is there anything I can bring back for you?
He laughs, and says, An Italian girl!
When the conference is over, he meets her up at the airport and asks, How was the trip?
Very good, she replies.
And what happened to my present?
Which present? she asks.
The one I asked for - an Italian girl!
Oh, that. I did what I could. We'll just have to wait 9 months to see if it's a girl.
An Asian man goes on a trip to America
He goes to an American Bank to converts his money to dollars, while going through his trip he meets a generous old friend who decides to let him stay in his place and also pay for his expenses during his stay.
After a few days he decides to return back to his country and heads to the bank to convert his money back. But the asian man sees that he received less money than he previously had even though he hadn't spent anything, so he asks about this to the banker.
The banker said," fluctuations ".
The asian man replied," fluck you americans too".
A woman has to go to Italy for a conference, so her husband drives her to the airport.
Thank you honey, she says, Is there anything I can bring back for you?
He laughs, and says, An Italian girl!
When the conference is over, he meets her up at the airport and asks, How was the trip?
Very good, she replies.
And what happened to my present?
Which present? she asks.
The one I asked for - an Italian girl!
Oh, that. I did what I could. We'll just have to wait 9 months to see if it's a girl.
My wife is madder at me than she has ever been.
She tripped and fell while carrying clothes she just ironed.
I didn't move.
"What are you doing?!" She yelled at me.
"Watching it all unfold," I said.
my nagging wife died suddenly on a trip in Jeruselum
f**... director: "Sir, it would cost about $45,000 if we send her home back to the states or $500 if we bury her here in Jerusalem"
Me: "ship her home"
f**... director: "But sir, why don't you bury her here in the Holy Land and you can save money"
Me: "A long time ago a man was buried here and 3 days later he rose from the dead, I can't take that chance"
My friend regularly takes anti-diarrhea pills and claims it increases his work productivity, due to reduced trips to the restroom daily.
I think he's full of s**....
My wife is an economist and I am an engineer.
I was watching my wife make her breakfast one morning, and noticed that she made way too many trips to get each of the items she needed. So I said in my best engineer voice, Hey sweetheart, why don't you utilize the load maximization principle and carry all the items you need in one trip, thereby minimizing total distance travelled?
Well don't you know, she loved my suggestion!
It used to take her 11 minutes to make her breakfast… now I do it in 5.
2 men go fishing, One has a stutter
The man with a stutter says shh ssshhh sshh . The other man says what is it, did you catch a fish ? The stuttering man continues to make ssshhh noises, the other man says spit it out . The stuttering man says ssshhh ship!! Before the 2nd man can react a ship crashes into their boat.
Months later they both have recovered and go on another fishing trip. The stuttering man again starts saying ssshhh . The 2nd man starts panicking thinking he's going to get hurt again. The 2nd man jumps out of the boat as fast as he can, the stuttering man says sshhh sshhh Shark!!
An American woman goes to Italy on business and asks her husband what she could bring back for him.
He laughs and says, "An Italian girl!"
When she returns home he picks her up at the airport and asks, "So, honey, how was the trip?"
"Very good," she replies.
"And did you bring something home for me?"
"Something, did I forget?" she asks.
"The Italian girl I asked for," he replies jokingly.
"Oh, that," she says. "Well, I did what I could. Now we have to wait nine months to see if it's a girl."
I have 100% legit proof that masks don't do s**...!
My wife went on a trip to her sister's.
On the plane they made her wear a mask.
Didn't do s**... - she got chlamydia anyway!
I recently heard about this young adult novel in which Schrodinger's cat and Pavlov's dog team up for a cross county adventure...
So I took a trip to the library to see if they
had a copy.
The librarian said that my description rang a
bell but she wasn't sure if it was there or not.
A wealthy man on a business trip calls home and the butler answers the phone: Can I talk to my wife, please?
The butler answers that she is currently in the bedroom with a man. What?!! Take the rifle in my study, go to the bedroom and shoot them both - I'll stay on the line
Very well, sir , the butler answers and he walks away from the phone. After about a minute, the man hears two gunshots and a moment later, the butler returns to the phone.
I shot them both, sir. What should I do with the bodies?
I don't care, throw them in the pool
We don't have a pool, sir
Ah, sorry, wrong number
Two women were fighting for the last available seat on the bus.
No amount of reasoning was helping the bus driver resolve the issue. In desperation he grabbed his training manual and announced:
'The policy is to allow the seat to go to the uglier one.'
Both women stood for the remainder of the trip.
A priest is being chased through the woods by a hungry bear.
As the priest is running, he makes an impassioned plea to God: Oh please God, in your infinite wisdom and mercy, turn this bear into a good Christian!
Before he can get another word out, he trips over a log and goes sprawling. The bear catches up and approaches the terrified priest. Rising up on its hind legs, it puts its paws together, and says
Lord, thank you for this meal that I am about to receive.
A Russian comes home after fishing trip
A Russian comes home after fishing trip and hears the news that Russia is at war. He asks another Russian what is going on, and he tells him:
"We are at war with NATO!"
"Oh wow, how many troops have been lost?"
"Well, we have lost 45,000 troops, almost 2000 tanks, a thousand artillery pieces, several hundred helicopters and aircraft, several generals have been captured, our economy is in shambles, and the Moskva was sunk.
"And NATO?"
"NATO hasn't showed up yet."
I need a funny punchline...
My bf is going on a trip and I thought it'd be fun to give him a joke and tell the punchline when he gets home. Only thing is we were on a time crunch and I just said the first thing that came to mind which was:
What do you call a sheep with 3 legs?
I have absolutely no idea so if anyone can think of a punchline for this please help me.
An original joke for you as thanks:
Why was the caribou wearing a disguise?
He wanted to remain anonymoose.
After a 2000 year absence, the v**... Mary takes a trip down to earth.
After a couple of days, she calls back to heaven. "Hi Peter, this is the v**... Mary. I met a man." Peter says to her, "That's not bad. This is how it is down on earth."
The next day she calls back to heaven. "Hi Peter, this is the v**... Mary. I kissed the man. Is that bad?" Peter says to her, "No, that's part of life on earth."
The next day she calls back to heaven. "Hi Peter, this is Mary."
I told my wife, Let's take a trip to upstate New York this weekend.
Her: Ok. By Buffalo?
Me: No, I was thinking of taking a car.
A young girl returns home after a bus trip with her dad
When she gets home she rushes to her mother to tell her about the trip.
After speaking of all the sights they saw she finished the story on the bus ride back:
"On the bus, daddy told me to offer my seat to a random lady so I did"
Her mother replied: "Oh wow! You did the right thing honey"
Frowning, the girl said: "But I was sitting in daddy's lap!"
Over the weekend we took a daddy daughter trip to San Antonio.
While there we visited the Alamo. As we were leaving she turns to me and says I'm so glad we came…. I almost forgot all about it!
It took me a second to get it. The battle cry of those Texas boys was remember the Alamo .
I couldn't be prouder!
I tripped on some mushrooms
... hurt my knees, but I'm alright
