Triplets Jokes
58 triplets jokes and hilarious triplets puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about triplets that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Laugh along with this collection of jokes featuring the Sturniolo Triplets, a trio of daughters born to the same family in the same pregnancy. Learn more about these unique triple pregnancies and the humorous situations they can inspire.
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Funniest Triplets Short Jokes
Short triplets jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The triplets humour may include short treble jokes also.
- You're meeting identical triplets tonight. One's from the Army, one's a lifestyle Vegan, and one is a diehard Trump supporter. How do you tell them apart? Don't worry. They'll tell you.
- After reading that Afghanistan had the highest infant mortality rate, this occurred to me. What do you call Afghan triplets?
Twins!
I am so sorry.... - Q: What did the blonde do when she found out she was pregnant with triplets?
A: She went looking for the three guys. - There was a pair of Siamese triplets, but they wanted to be a pair. So they cut out the middle man.
- Did you hear about the man whose wife had triplets? He got out his gun and went looking for the other 2 guys.
- A father wanted to name his kids with 'Ger' in their names. In succession, the first child was name Gerald, the next was named Geraldine. The father then had triplets. That was Germany.
- What would it be called if the Umbrella Academy had another sibling, and then triplets, but one of them was taller than the other 2? 2 number 9's and a number 9 large.
- Why did the guy have to break up with his triplet Wiccan girlfriend? He couldn't tell which witch was which.
- I had set with Siamese triplets the other day Honestly once you've done one you've done them all
- Stevie Wonder Stevie Wonder is having triplets at the age of 64.
I bet he didn't see that coming...
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Triplets One Liners
Which triplets one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with triplets? I can suggest the ones about quadruple and threes.
- What do you call five African-Americans born together? Triplets.
- What did the drummer call his triplets? Anna One, Anna Two, Anne Three
- Did you hear about the guy that got trampled by the triplets? He's six feet under now.
- I don't see the big deal with triplets. You see one, you've seen them all.
- Having identical triplets is like.... Having one kid with multiple personalities.
- What do you call three brothers taking acid together? Triplets
- Where does a woman go shopping after having triplets? Big Box Store.
- Twins in utero share secrets... Triplets spread wombers.
- Why didn't the four year old triplets go into the haunted house? They were all three 2².
- What do you call handicapped triplets? Triple cripple
- What is the hardest part about having triplets? Choosing which one to keep
- I've slept with a series of triplets i called it a waltz
- If you clone a twin... Do you get triplets?
Amusing Triplets Jokes to Make You Laugh with Friends
What funny jokes about triplets you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean trio jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make triplets pranks.
Three men were at a bar discussing coincidences.
The first man said, "My wife was reading A Tale of Two Cities and she gave birth to twins." "That’s funny," the second man remarked, "My wife was reading The Three Musketeers and she gave birth to triplets." The third man shouted, "Oh my, I have to rush home!" When asked what the problem was, he exclaimed, "When I left the house, my wife was reading Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves!"
Three men were at a bar discussing coincidences.
The first man said, "My wife was reading A Tale of Two Cities and she gave birth to twins."
"That’s funny," the second man remarked, "My wife was reading The Three Musketeers and she gave birth to triplets."
The third man shouted, "Oh my, I have to rush home!"
When asked what the problem was, he exclaimed, "When I left the house, my wife was reading Ali Baba and the Forty Thieves!"
I was sitting in the waiting room of the hospital after my wife had gone into labour and the nurse walked out and said to the man sitting next to me, "Congratulations sir, you’re the new father of twins!"
The man replied, "How about that, I work for the Doublemint Chewing Gum Company."
The man then followed the woman to his wife’s room.
About an hour later, the same nurse entered the waiting room and announced that Mr. Smith’s wife has just had triplets.
Mr. Smith stood up and said, "Well, how do ya like that, I work for the 3M Company."
The gentleman that was sitting next to me then got up and started to leave.
When I asked him why he was leaving, he remarked, "I think I need a breath of fresh air."
The man continued, "I work for 7-UP."
Three men are in a waiting room while their wives are giving birth...
The nurse comes out and says to the first man, "Congratulations, you're the father of twins!" "That's funny," he said," I work for Double Tree. Later on the nurse came out again and said to the second father, saying, "Congratulations, you're the father of triplets!" The man responded, "That's funny, I work for 3M. The third man started b**... his head against the wall, yelling. When they asked him what was wrong, he responded, "I work for 7 Up!"
Triplets
There are triplets in a mothers w**..., talking about what they want to do when they grow up.
The first triplet says "When I grow up, I will be an electrician, because it's too dark in here."
The second triplet says "When I grow up, I will be a plumber, because it's too wet in here."
The third triplet says, "When I grow up I want to be a boxer, so that I can beat up that bald guy who comes in here and spits on us all the time!"
A woman pregnant with triplets gets shot
A 9 month pregnant woman with triplets is waiting in line at the bank when robbers run in and start firing shots. The woman gets shot in the belly 3 times and is taken to the hospital. After the surgery the nurse tells the woman that she will be fine and that her babies are fine too, however, this is an unusual situation where the bullets are in each of her babies and after some years the bullets will come out.
Ten years later, one of her daughters comes crying to her. She asks, "whats wrong sweety?" "Mommy, I was peeing and a bullet came out," replied the daughter. The woman remembers what the nurse had told her years ago so she tells her daughter, "Its okay Christy. It happens."
A couple weeks later, her second daughter comes crying to her. She asks, "whats wrong sweety?" "Mommy, I was peeing and a bullet came out," she says. The woman again calms down her daugher, "Its okay Jenny. It happens."
A couple weeks later, her son comes crying to her. She asks, "what is it Johnny? Did you pee and a bullet came out?" Johnny says, "no. I was jacking off and I shot the dog!"
Be careful of your aim
A woman was pregnant with triplets.
One day she goes into this bank as it was being held up. She gets shot 3 times in her stomach, but luckily she lives.
She goes to the doctor who tells her that her children will be all right, and that one day the bullets will come out.
So 13 years later, one triplet, a girl, runs out of the bathroom and says "MOM, MOM, I WAS GOING TO THE BATHROOM AND A BULLET CAME OUT!" So the mother tells her the story.
The next day the second daughter comes out and says the same thing, "MOM, I WAS GOING TO THE BATHROOM AND A BULLET CAME OUT!"
On the third day the son comes out and says "MOM, MOM!" So she goes, "Let me guess, you were going to the bathroom and a bullet came out?" he replies "No, I was jerking off and I shot the dog!"
A woman pregnant with triplets catches three stray bullets from a drive-by shooting.
In the emergency room, a doctor tells her she and her unborn children will be fine but they could not remove the bullets. He informs her all is well and the children, two girls and a boy, will pee the bullets out in around 16 years.
So around the 16th year, the mother is in the kitchen making her morning coffee when one her daughters runs in, frantic and concerned.
"Mom! Mom! I was peeing and a bullet came out!"
Her mother tells her there's nothing to worry about and tells her the story.
Then around noon, the mother is in the garden watering some flowers when the other daughter comes outside and says
"Mom! Mom! I was peeing and a bullet came out!" The mother explains everything and goes back to watering.
That night the mother was laying in bed reading when her son burst into her room.
"Mom! Mom! I was-"
"Let me guess, you were peeing and a bullet came out?"
"No, no!" says the son, "I was jacking off and I shot the dog!"
Three men are in the waiting room while their wives are giving birth.
The doctor comes up to the first man and says that he is now a father of triplets.
The man is thrilled and he says-
"Wow! That's kind of cool because I work at 3M!"
A couple hours later the doctor comes out and tells the next man that he is a father of quadruplets. The man says-
"Wow! That's even cooler because I work at the Four Seasons Hotel!"
The third man immediately starts crying and the doctor asks him whats wrong-
"I work for 20th Century Fox."
A pregnant mother of triplets is walking down a alley....
The Mother gets shot 3 times and each bullet gets lodged in each of the babies with no serious damage done to the mother or the babies. Months later the babys are born, two beautiful girls and a boy. One day the one of the little girls goes to the bathroom and comes out and says to the mother "mommy! mommy! Guess what?!" And the mom asks "what?" And the little girl says "I went tickle and the bullet fell out!" And the mother says "wow that's great!" A few hours later the other little girl goes into the bathroom and comes out and says "mommy! Mommy! Guess what?" And the mom goes "what, you went tickle and the bullet fell out?" And the girl goes "yeah!" Hours later the little boy runs up the mother and says "Mommy! Mommy! Guess what?" And the mom says "what, You went tickle and the bullet fell out?" And the boy says "No I was jacking off and I shot the dog!!"
(A very old joke I thought you guys would like)
I shot the dog...
A woman pregnant with triplets is walking down the street when a
masked robber runs out the bank and shoots her three times in the stomach. Luckily the babies are okay. The surgeon decides to leave the bullets in because it's too risky to operate.
All is fine for 16 years, and then one daughter walks into the room in tears. "What's wrong?" asks the mother.
"I was having a pee and this bullet came out" replies the daughter. The mother tells her it's okay and explains what happened 16 years ago. About a week later the second daughter walks in to the room in tears.
"Mom, I was having a pee and this bullet came out". Again the mother tells her not to worry and explains what happened 16 years ago. A week later the boy walks into the room in tears.
"It's okay" says the mom, "I know what happened, you were having a pee and a bullet came out."
"No," says the boy, "I was jerking off and I shot the dog."
Three guys are in a hospital waiting room
Each of them has a wife in labor and is anxiously awaiting the arrival of their bundle of joy. The nurse comes out and says to the first man, "Congratulations...your wife has given birth to twins!" The man says, "Wow, that is such a blessing. Twins! Imagine that! You know what's funny, though? I work for the Minnesota Twins, so that's kind of a coincidence!"
Five minutes later the nurse returns and says to the second guy, "Congratulations! Your wife was carrying triplets, and they are all healthy...two boys and a girl!" The man is thrilled. "Triplets! Imagine that! Wow, two boys and a girl! You know what's funny, though; I work for 3M, so that's kind of a coincidence!"
The third man then suddenly reaches for his coat and starts to head for the exit. Confused, the nurse says, "Wait a minute! Your wife is in labor...don't you want to stay and be with her??" The guy replies, "No way. Forget it. I'm outta here. I'm a truck driver for 7up!"
A woman gives birth to triplets
She and her husband are trying to figure out why so many.
"It was probably that time we ran out of lubricant and we used 3-in-one oil instead." says the wife. "Good thing we didn't use WD-40."
A woman pregnant with triplets is shot three times...
by a mugger in the stomach while she's walking home one night. The doctors save her and the babies but tell her that eventually the kids will have to have the bullets removed.
Well, they're born healthy, three strapping sons, and they grow normally and she forgets all about the bullets until one day one comes down, crying his eyes out. She asks him what's wrong and he says, "I was peeing and I peed out a bullet." She tells him the story and, satisfied, he goes on his way. Then another son comes down crying his eyes out. She asks him what's wrong and he also says, "I was peeing and I peed out a bullet." She tells him the story too and, satisfied, he goes on his way.
Then the third son comes down, crying his eyes out, and she says, "Let me guess, you were peeing and you peed out a bullet?" He shakes his head and replies, "No, I was jacking off and I shot the dog."
3 guys are waiting while their wives give birth
A nurse emerges from the back and says, "Mr. David, come on back, your wife has delivered two beautiful babies!"
"Wow! Twins, huh? That's interesting, I'm from the twin rivers." Said Mr. David
After another hour, a second nurse comes into their room and says, "Mr. Smith, you wife has had healthy triplets!"
"That's awesome!" Replied Mr. Smith, "I'm from the three islands, Jonu, Frot and Trik." And with that he went back with the nurse
The third man begins sweating and praying. The first nurse returns to see if he's fine and if he needs anything. He looks terrified so she asks what's wrong.
"I'm from the forest of 1,000 trees!!"
A woman pregnant with triplets gets shot 3 times in the gut.
They rush her to the hospital and everything turns out ok. The babies are all fine.
12 years later one of her daughters comes to her worried "mom mom mom i was peeing and a bullet came out!"
"Thats strange." Says the mom.
A few days after that her other daughter rushes up "MOM MOM MOM i was peeing and a bullet came out!"
"Thats really strange" says the mom.
A few more weeks pass without issue, then her son comes up to her "MOM MOM MOM" she cuts him off "let me guess, you were peeing and a bullet came out."
"NO! I WAS JACKING OFF AND I SHOT THE DOG!"
A woman is pregnant with triplets and is shot in the stomach 3 times...
The babies seem unharmed and she gives birth a few weeks later, 2 girls and a boy.
8 years later one of the girls comes to her crying and says she just peed out a bullet, so her mother explains what happened.
A year after that the second daughter comes to her crying, the mom asks why and she has also peed out a bullet, the mom explains what happened.
5 years later the boy comes to her crying and the mother asks "let me guess, you peed out a bullet?" To which the son responds "No, I was jacking off and shot the dog"
A woman was shot 3 times while pregnent with triplets.
She and her babies survived. 14 years later, her daughter comes to her and says "mom I peed out a bullet." The mother was shocked to hear such a thing. A few hours later, her other daughter comes to her and says she also peed out a bullet. Sure enough there was another bullet in the toilet.
Her son then comes to her the next day, frantically saying "Mom! Guess what!"
"You peed out a bullet, didn't you?"
"No, I was jacking off and shot the dog!"
An expecting father paces nervously up and down the waiting room.
"First child?" Asks another father
"No" replies the first.
"Well then why are you so anxious?"
"When my wife read 'A tale of two cities', she had twins. When she read 'The three musketeers' she had triplets."
"That's amazing." says the second Man
"Yes" replies the first "but she just finished reading 'Birth of a Nation'.
Four expectant fathers.
Four expectant fathers were in a Minneapolis hospital waiting room, while their wives were in labour.
The nurse tells the first man, "Congratulations! You're the father of twins!"
"What a coincidence! I work for the Minnesota Twins baseball team!"
The nurse returns and tells the second man, "You are the father of triplets!"
"Wow, what a coincidence! I work for 3M Corporation!"
When the nurse tells the third man that his wife has given birth to quadruplets.
"Another coincidence! I work for Four Seasons Hotel!"
At this point, the fourth guy faints. When he comes to, the others ask what's wrong.
"What's wrong?! I work for Seven-Up!"
A musician goes into labor
To help keep her mind away from the pain and maintain her breathing, she begins counting her sheet music out loud. Her contractions gradually get stronger, when she calls out, Oh god! The triplets are coming!
One and a two and a three and a!
Three fathers were in the hospital waiting room for news about their new born children.
The nurse comes out and congratulates the first father for getting twins, the father is both happy over the news and also amazed that it's twins because he works at the "two hands hardware store".
After a while the nurse comes back out and congratulates the second father for getting triplets, he too is amazed because he works for "the three fathers of mining solutions".
After a while the nurse comes out to congratulate the third father but sees him standing in front of the open window, ready to jump out. She asks "what is his issue?". One of the fathers reply: "he works at seven eleven..."
Three men were waiting outside the labor ward...
A nurse came out to tell the first man: "Congratulations. You are the father of twins." "Twins!"he exclaimed "How about that? I work for the Doublemint Chewing Gum Co!"
Five minutes later, a nurse came out to tell the second man: "Congratulations. You are the father of triplets." "Triplets!" he said "What a coincidence! I work for the 3M Organization!"
Upon hearing this, the third man stood up & muttered: ''I need some air, I work for 7 up!"
Three Irish men in a pub called says, "Are you all related?" m**... said, "Yeah we're triplets". Barman says, "Triplets, how Come you & Pat are six foot tall & Tat is only four foot tall?"
"Well", said m**..., "Me & Pat
were breast fed, so there was no t**... for tat".
-My wife read the book "Twins" and she gave birth to twins
\-Mine read the book "Three little girls" and she gave birth to triplets
\-Oh my god! I left my wife reading "Ali baba and the forty thieves"
3 Irish men in a pub…
… called m**..., Pat and Tat. The barman says "Are you all related?"
m**... said "Yeah we're triplets!"
Barman said "Triplets!, how come you and Pat are 6ft tall and Tat is only 4ft tall?",
"Well!" said m**... "Me and Pat were
breast fed so there was no t**... for Tat!
