Tribe Jokes
121 tribe jokes and hilarious tribe puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about tribe that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Discover the funny and light-hearted side of tribal life with this selection of jokes about Indian and Native American tribes, the Tribe of Dardanaak, Tribesmen, Pygmies, and Wilderness people. Enjoy a laugh and explore a unique culture!
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Funniest Tribe Short Jokes
Short tribe jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The tribe humour may include short tribal jokes also.
- What's the difference between a tribe of clever pygmies and a girls' track team? One is a group of cunning runts.
- an elephant looked through the tall grass when he saw a nudist tribe it gasped and said said how do you breathe through those?
- In primitive society, when native tribes beat the ground with clubs and yelled, it was called witchcraft Today, in civilized society, it is called golf.
- Did you read The Indian In The Cupboard as a kid? I text my wife my musing about his tribe. Do you think he was a plAZTEC Indian?
We finalize the divorce paperwork tomorrow she says. - Do you know what cannibal tribes have said about the taste of human flesh? It's an acquired taste that varies person to person.
- In the end, the tribe of cannibals caught the Hardy Boys. That night, they had mystery meat.
- I recently opened a restaurant on top of ancient indian burial grounds. When I tried to explain my business to the local tribe they interrupted Apparently they already had some reservations.
- Has anyone heard of that Indian tribe that shape shift into Carp and float slowly through the woods all spooky-like? You mean you've never heard of the Eerie Koi before?
- Conversation between John chou and indian sentinels tribe John chou : meet the jesus
Sentinels : You first - They asked a tribes person which is more important, the sun or the moon. He said, "The moon because the sun shines when it's light out anyway."
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Tribe One Liners
Which tribe one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with tribe? I can suggest the ones about clan and brigade.
- What do you call a war between two cannibal tribes? A food fight.
- What do you call a Rwandan tribe falling down a hill? Tutsi Roll.
- There is a tribe in Africa that worships the number zero. Is nothing sacred?
- What do you call the leader of the Cravings Tribe? The "Hanker"chief
- Have you heard of the Fakarwee Tribe? It's because they're always lost.
- I saw a tribe in Sweden. Abbariginals.
- I sent a postcard to an African tribe suffering from drought 'Hope you get well soon'
- What's a marching bands favorite Germanic Tribe? The Saxons
- What modern tribe of men takes their young daughter hunting. The Supermarket tribe.
- The Bongo Bongo Tribe
- What do A Tribe Called Quest and margarine have in common? It's like butter, baby.
- Every tribe needs a straight lady.
- I'm fiercely loyal to a particular brand of toothpaste. I'm in a Tribe Called Crest.
- What did one indian tribe say to the other? We're the Fugawi! We're the Fugawi!
- What tribe put up a hock shop next to the indian casino? The Pawnee
Indian Tribe Jokes
Here is a list of funny indian tribe jokes and even better indian tribe puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Have you ever heard of the lost Indian tribe the Halarwi? they walk around the forest saying "were the halarwi"
- A early American settler meets and befriends an Indian tribe. That's...
That's the joke. - How long is an indian He is from the Sioux tribe.
- I'm part indian My ancestors are from the slapahoe tribe.
Native American Tribe Jokes
Here is a list of funny native american tribe jokes and even better native american tribe puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Ted lived a great distance from the Native Americans. He was known among the tribe as Far Ted.
- There is a cross dressing native american tribe in my town... They call the tribe Mashantucket
Share Hilarious Tribe Jokes and Enjoy Unforgettable Laughter
What funny jokes about tribe you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean congregation jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make tribe pranks.
The Fukawi Tribe
There was once a tribe of very short people who lived on an island in very long grass. One day an explorer stumbled upon this large grass covered island and intact discovered the tribe. He was very excited but decided since he was not sure if they were a peaceful people or not he would not engage this time, instead he would come back better equipped in a few days. When he got home he decided to tell his fellow explorers about the tribe he had discovered. He sat with them in a bar and told them all about the island and the long grass and the tiny people. Finishing his story he said so I've discovered this incredible tribe they're new and they're called the Fukawi tribe his best friend astounded said but how did you come up with the name?
Oh I didn't came the reply they named themselves, and when I approached them they kept jumping up yelling we're the Fukawi
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
2 guys..
Are lost and in the woods, when they get captured by indians. The indian chief tells the first man "Either we kill you or we give you b**... b**...." Well the first guy doesnt want to die, so he decides b**... b**.... The chief yells "Yeah!!!b**... b**...!!", and the whole tribe proceeds to r**... the man for two hours, leaving him beaten and near death. The chief then asks the second guy the same question. Well he decides he sure doesn't want b**... b**..., so he tells the chief they can kill him. The chief looks around and yells "Yeah!!! Death by b**... b**...!!!!!"
The Drums Must Not Stop
A man was exploring the African jungle and came upon a tribe of natives, their presence underscored by the distinctive and monotonous beating of drums. The man spoke with the tribe and they allowed him to stay with them and sleep on their grounds.
The first night, the man didn't sleep a wink due to the ongoing drumming so he spoke to the chief. "Chief, I got no sleep last night. Could you maybe stop the drumming for a night so I could rest?"
The chief replied, "The drums must not stop."
The man figured it was their culture and focused on enjoying the day, studying and spending time with the tribe.
That night, the drums again kept the man awake for the whole night and in the morning he spoke with the chief.
"Chief, please! I need some sleep; couldn't the drums cease for just one night for my health?"
The chief replied, "The drums must not stop."
The man, exacerbated, let the issue drop and tried to focus on the day at hand, but could not focus due to lack of sleep and the incessant pounding of the drums.
That night, the beating of the drums left the man sleepless yet again in the morning he angrily approached the chief.
"Chief, I've just about had it. The drums must stop; it is impossible to get any rest with them!"
The chief replied, "The drums must not stop."
"Why! Why can the drums not stop? What happens when the drums stop?!"
The chief replied, "Bass solo."
The chief of a tribe in Mexico dies.
His son is now the chief. Since he never learned the ways of his forefathers to predict winters, when he gets asked what should the tribe do, he just tells them to collect firewood. He then goes to the National Weather Station in Mexico and asks them how bad winter is going to be. They tell him; "It looks like it will be pretty bad". Shocked, he goes back to his tribe and tells them to gather more firewood. He goes back to the weather station and asks them again if winter will be bad. They answer, "It is going to be one of the worst winters in a decade." The Chief goes back to the village and tells them to gather more firewood. Then he goes for a third time to the weather station and asks them again, "will the winter be bad?" They respond, "It will be the worst winter in a century." The chief asks them, "How do you know winter will be bad?" They answer, "Because the Indians are gathering firewood like crazy!"
Snoo-Snoo
Three men are hunting on the African Savanna when they are captured by one of the tribes that live in the area. They are blindfolded, gagged and led into a hut to be held prisoner. After a while the chief of this tribe comes into the hut takes off their blindfolds and gags and begins to speak. He tells the three men that they have a choice between either Snoo-Snoo, or death. The first man gets up and says that whatever it is it can't be worse than death, The chief walks out and shouts to the tribe who begin to dance and cheer. The man is forced outside as every man in the tribe has his way with him, but as promised when they are all finished he is free to go. The second man see's this and also decides it is better than death and also chooses Snoo-Snoo. The third man has a solemn look on his face and when the chief asks him his choice. the man says he couldn't live with himself if that happened, so he chooses death. The Chief of the tribe nods and yells out to the tribe "He choose death... By Snoo-Snoo!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Three men are traveling in the wilderness...
when they are captured by a tribe of hunters. When the three men are brought back to the tribe's village, they're confronted by the Chief's attendant. The attendant tells them that each of the three men has two choices. These two choices are either death or what the tribe refers to as "umbangi". "Umbangi" they come to realize means being bound and essentially r**... by the Chief. But afterwards the tribe will release you.
The first man says that he has a family back home and will do anything to see them again. He therefore chooses umbangi.
The second man says that he is too young to die and therefore chooses umbangi.
The third man, unlike the other two, is too proud to choose umbangi and therefore chooses death.
Upon hearing the third man's decision the Chief shouts out "Death by Umbangi!!!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Caught by a local tribe.
A Frenchman, an Englishman and a New Yorker were captured by cannibals. The chief comes to them and says, "The bad news is that now we've caught you and we're going to kill you. We will put you in a p**..., cook you, eat you and then we're going to use your skins to build a canoe. The good news is that you can choose how to die."
The Frenchman says, "I take ze sword." The chief gives him a sword, the Frenchman says, "Vive la France!" and runs himself through.
The Englishman says, "a p**... for me please." The chief gives him a p**..., the Englishman points it at his head and says, "God save the queen!" and blows his brains out.
The New Yorker says, "Gimme a fork!" The chief is puzzled, but he shrugs and gives him a fork. The New Yorker takes the fork and starts jabbing himself all over--the stomach, the sides, the chest, everywhere. There is blood gushing out all over, it's horrible. The chief is appalled and asks, "My God, what are you doing?"
And the New Yorker responds, "So much for your canoe you s**... cannibal!
(my dad told me this one)
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The Bicycle
A m**... was walking with the tribe chief in a remote part of Africa explaining to him the wonders of modern society. As they were walking, they see movements in the bushes near them.
Fearing that it might be lions, the chief stood still while the curious m**... went to see what lies behind the bushes. To his amazement he sees a man and a woman going at it. He retreats and joins the chief.
"Lets go. It's just a guy riding a bicycle"
Having never seen a bicycle before, the chief excitedly went behind the bushes. After seeing for himself what the m**... had seen, he pulled out his spear and killed the man.
"Why did you do that?" the m**... asked.
to which the chief answered, "He was riding my bicycle."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Native American boy walks up to the the Chief of his tribe...
He says to the Chief "Great Chief, where do the people of our tribe get their names?" the chief replies, "Well, each infant is given a name by their father seconds before the mother gives birth. You see, what the father does is observe the nature around them and let its spirit inspire them." The boy says "I see, this makes some sense to me." and the Chief explains to the boy, "You're friend, Soaring-eagle, received his name when his father saw an eagle fly directly above the hut that his wife was giving birth in." The boy still looked slightly confused, so the Chief asked "Why exactly are you seeking this information. Did you want to know where you're name originated, Twodogsfucking?"
Three men are shipwrecked...
... they drift towards an island unconsciously. They awake to be taken captive by a local cannibalistic tribe. The tribe chief tells the first man that the tribe will eat his meat, and he is to chose his own death. The man thinks about it and decides decapitation. So he is decapitated.
The chief then tells the second man that they will use his bones to create drumsticks with which they will play their drums. He is allowed to chose his own form of execution as well. So the man chooses poising.
Then they go to the third man and tell him that they will use his skin to cover the bottom of their boats, and tell him to chose his own form of execution. The man asks for a fork, and they bring him one. He then starts stabbing himself and says, "lets see you float a boat with this."
A genie appears in an African tribe...
A genie appears in an African tribe to grant a wish to every villager.
He makes them line up and asks them one by one what they would like.
The first: I want to be white. The genie turns him white.
The second: I want to be white. The genie turns him white.
A guy in the middle of the line moves to the end of the line, grinning wildly.
The 3rd: I want to be white. The genie turns him white.
The following 10: I want to be white.
The guy in the back starts to laugh.
The 25th : I want to be white...
The guy is now exploding with laughter.
The 40 th, 50 th ... : I want to be white...
The 60th, 70th 80th: I want to be white...
By now the guy can hardly stand, he's laughing so hard it hurts.
The 90 th, 95 th ... 99th : They all wish to be white...
When it's finally the last guy's turn, it takes him 15 minutes to control his laughter enough to make his request.
He says : I wish for all of them to be black again.
The Lone Ranger
Once, in the Wild, Wild West, the lone ranger was captured by an Indian tribe. The Chief of the tribe says, "I have heard of you, Lone Ranger. If you can impress me enough within three days, I will let you go free."
So, the Lone Ranger thinks hard for a few minutes and says, "May I have a minute alone with my horse?"
The Chief obliges him, and not 30 seconds later, the horse gallops out of the tent and runs away. The Chief is puzzled, but the Lone Ranger seems satisfied nonetheless. A few hours pass, but then the Lone Ranger's horse returns with an absolutely beautiful blonde girl, with whom the Lone Ranger spends the night.
The Chief is absolutely amazed, but not enough so to let the Lone Ranger go. So, the Lone Ranger asks to, again, hold council with his horse. And again, the horse gallops away, returning later with a redhead even more beautiful than the previous lady.
The next day, the Chief tells the Lone Ranger, although he is impressed, he is not going to let him go. So, the Lone Ranger asks to be left alone with his horse. After the tribe vacated the room, he whispers into the horse's ear very succinctly,
"Bring. Posse."
The legend of the Lost Fokawi Tribe
Several hundred years ago, there were two rival Indian tribes. One was called the Fokawe, and the other was called the Shoshones. These tribes had battled and fought fiercely for many years. Finally, the Shoshones decided they had enough, and wanted to rid the world of the Fokawe once and for all. They met and strategized their attack for months, and finally the day came when they were ready to carry out their mission.
The tribe gathered all of its warriors and when the signal was given they ran to the Fokawe's village. Hollering and hooting, they raised their weapons ready to kill, only to realize that there were no Fokawi's anywhere. The teepees were vacant, and no supplies were anywhere to be found. The Shoshones searched for days for their rivals to no avail, yelling "Where the fo-ka-we? Where the fo-ka-we?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
African Roulette
Four men are captured by a tribe in the middle of Africa.
The tribe leader gives them the choice of either death, or they can try their luck at "African Roulette."
The men, as one of the choices seemingly had a chance to stay alive, hastily all chose the second option.
The tribe leader lined up 6 extremely gorgeous women in front of the men, and said "You must choose one of these beautiful women to preform o**... s**... on you."
The men saw nothing wrong with this and were ecstatic at their luck, yet confused about the "roulette" part.
As they chose their women and were getting ready, the tribe leader spoke up and said, "One of them is a cannibal."
Black sheep
A professor is sent to darkest Africa to live with a primitive tribe. He spends years with them, teaching them reading, writing, math and science.
One day the wife of the tribe's chief gives birth to a white child. The tribe is shocked, and the chief pulls the professor aside and says, "Look here! You're the only white man we've ever seen and this woman gives birth to a white child. It doesn't take a genius to figure out what happened!"
The professor replied, "No, Chief. You're mistaken. What you have here is a natural occurrence, what we in the civilized world call an albino! Look at that field over there. All of the sheep are white except for one black one. Nature does this on occasion."
The chief was silent for a moment, then said, "Tell you what. You don't say anything more about that sheep and I won't say anything more about that white child.
In a far away land over the seas, there lives a tribe of 2 foot tall pygmies who live in 3 foot tall grass...
... called the Fug-ow-ees. They were named by an explorer who stumbled upon them one day in his travels and heard them say something along the lines of "we're the Fug-ow-ee."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Three explorers and a cannibalistic tribe
There were three explorers out on an expedition when they suddenly realized that they were lost. They walked around for hours when finally they saw smoke in the distance. They knew there must be a civilization there so they headed in that direction.
When they got there they were confronted by the warriors of the tribe and were immediately t**... and held captive. Later, the leader of the tribe confronted them and explained that their tribe was a cannibalistic tribe and that they would kill them, skin them, eat them and then use their skin as a canoe but they would be able to choose how they would be killed.
The first explorer says ""I brought a gun with me on my expedition, I wish to be killed with that." So they pulled the gun out of his backpack and shot him.
The second explorer says "I too wish to be killed by the gun as I believe it would be the most painless way." So they shot him as well.
The third explorer says "I have a fork in my backpack and I wish to be killed with that. I would however, like to do it myself."
The tribesman all looked at each other puzzled, but figured he could not possibly harm them with a fork so they agreed.
The explorer then began to repeatedly stab himself in the chest. The tribesman again looked at each other with puzzlement on their faces so the leader of the tribe asked the explorer "What are you doing?" to which the explorer exclaimed "I'M f**...' UP YOUR CANOE!!"
So a Greek, Frenchman and Italian strand on an island
So after a while being stuck they decide to search for food.
Suddenly a tribe comes out of nowhere and took them as captive.
The tribe decided to interrogate them.
So the tribe decides to interrogate the Greek as first, after 1 hour the Greek comes out without feet.
He told everything after they cut his feet off.
Then they decided to interrogate the Frenchman, after 2 hours the Frenchman comes back without an ear.
The Frenchman told the tribe everything after the tribe cut his ear off.
At last the tribe decides to interrogate the Italian, after 20 hours the Italian came back without telling the tribe anything.
Impressed, the Greek asked why the Italian did not tell the tribe anything, the Italian said:
"I wanted to but they cut off my hands"!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A military plane has some technical difficulties and is forced to c**...-land on an island in the Pacific.
As it turns out, it was inhabited by cannibals. Without much ado, the crew are captured and delivered to the village, to be put in the communal p**....
The chief of the tribe approaches, and asks them "Who might you be, snacks from above?"
"Airman Sam Jones," says one.
"Airman Dan Williams."
"Airman First Class Ted Robins."
"Commander John Simmons."
"Ah, congratulations!" says the cannibal.
"Er, thank you? Why?"
"Well sir, tomorrow you will be Commander-in-Chief!"
How stock markets work!
It was autumn, and the Red Indians asked their New Chief if the winter was going to be cold or mild.
Since he was a Red Indian chief in a modern society, he couldn't tell what the weather was going to be.
Nevertheless, to be on the safe side, he replied to his Tribe that the winter was indeed going to be cold and that the members of the village should collect wood to be prepared.
But also being a practical leader, after several days he got an idea. He went to the phone booth, called the National Weather Service and asked 'Is the coming winter going to be cold?'
'It looks like this winter is going to be quite cold indeed,' the weather man responded.
So the Chief went back to his people and told them to collect even more wood. A week later, he called the National Weather Service again.
'Is it going to be a very cold winter?'
'Yes,' the man at National Weather Service again replied,
'It's definitely going to be a very cold winter.'
The Chief again went back to his people and ordered them to collect every scrap of wood they could find.
Two weeks later, he called the National Weather Service again.
'Are you absolutely sure that the winter is going to be very cold?'
'Absolutely,' the man replied. 'It's going to be one of the coldest winters ever.'
'How can you be so sure?' the Chief asked.
The weatherman replied, 'The Red Indians are collecting wood like crazy.'
This is how stock markets work!
How national weather service predicts weather.
It was autumn, and the Red Indians asked their New Chief if the winter was going to be cold or mild.
Since he was a Red Indian chief in a modern society, he couldn't tell what the weather was going to be.
Nevertheless, to be on the safe side, he replied to his Tribe that the winter was indeed going to be cold and that the members of the village should collect wood to be prepared.
But also being a practical leader, after several days he got an idea. He went to the phone booth, called the National Weather Service and asked 'Is the coming winter going to be cold?'
'It looks like this winter is going to be quite cold indeed,' the weather man responded.
So the Chief went back to his people and told them to collect even more wood. A week later, he called the National Weather Service again.
'Is it going to be a very cold winter?'
'Yes,' the man at National Weather Service again replied,
'It's definitely going to be a very cold winter.'
The Chief again went back to his people and ordered them to collect every scrap of wood they could find.
Two weeks later, he called the National Weather Service again.
'Are you absolutely sure that the winter is going to be very cold?'
'Absolutely,' the man replied. 'It's going to be one of the coldest winters ever.'
'How can you be so sure?' the Chief asked.
The weatherman replied, 'The Red Indians are collecting wood like crazy.'
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Oogaly Boogaly
A white man, Chinese man and a black man were in Africa doing research when they were captured by a tribe. First, they were tied to stakes. The chief then walked up to the white man and asked, death or oogaly boogaly. The white man thought, I don't want to die, I'll take oogaly boogaly. So the chief loosened his ropes, took him to the edge of the forest, within sight of the other two and all of the tribesmen r**... him. The chief then asked the Chinese man, death or oogaly boogaly? the Chinese man thought, remembered the screems of the white man, but didn't want to die. So he said, 'oogaly boogaly'. So the chief loosened his ropes, took him to the edge of the forest and all of the tribesmen r**... him. Then the chief walked up to the black man and asked 'death, or oogaly boogaly?' The black man said, naw man, just give me death.' The chief said 'OK, death, by oogaly boogaly!
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Two Dogs (From the movie Silkwood)
A young brave visits the chief of the tribe with a question. "Wise one, is it true you name all the members of the tribe, and if so, how is it done?"
The venerable old man replies "Yes, for over 20 years I have named each person who is born to the tribe. I sit outside the lodge, and when I hear the infants' first cry, I open my eyes and the first thing I see becomes the name. So it was with your brother Big Bear, your sister Singing Bird, your cousin Blue Cloud, and so on."
"But tell me, Two Dogs F**king...... why do you ask?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Alright, d**.... Native American jokes it is.
"Father, tell me again about how we get our names."
"Well, in our tribe we name our children after the cause of their birth. You sister is named 'Beautiful Doe' because your mother saw a deer so lovely that she came to me passionately. Your brother is named 'Deep Snow' because the storm was so bad your mother and I needed to share our bodies to stay warm."
"Okay father, I understand."
"I'm glad you understand, but why do you ask me this question so often, Broken c**...?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Hugga-Bugga
Three African explorers are captured by a tribe of savages, and are brought before the chief.
"You have trespassed on our land," says the chief. "Your choice is death, or hugga-bugga."
The first explorer thinks about it, and chooses hugga-bugga. The savages then bend him over a tree stump, and the chief gives him a good a**...-f**.... They let him go, and he stumbles off.
The second explorer is given the same option. "I don't want to die," he thinks, "and that didn't look so bad." So he chooses hugga-bugga. This time they bend him over the tree stump, and after the chief is done, all of his top hunters have a go. They let him go, and he hobbles off.
The third explorer is horrified, and sees that it keeps getting worse, so when he is asked, he chooses death.
"So be it," the chief says, "Death, by hugga-bugga."
The Old African King
There was once a highly respected King of an African tribe. Every year since his thirtieth birthday, he had been given a brand new throne to sit in for the year. Each year, the new throne far surpassed the beauty and value of the one prior to it. The problem was, each person in this tribe lived in grass huts, so the king had no choice but to put his old thrones in his attic.
So, on his sixtieth birthday, the king had room for only one more throne in his attic. His servants took it up, and as they sat it down the ceiling came crashing down onto the king and killed him.
Moral of the story: those who live in grass houses, shouldn't stow thrones.
An anthropologist visits a tribe that eats only meat...
An anthropologist visits an exclusively carnivorous tribe in previously uncharted deep-jungle territory and word gets around about this strange woman who eats plants.
M'buk says to T'gru, "Have you heard about this woman who eats *plants?*"
T'gru gets this puzzled look and says "no, I've never heard of herbivore!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The shortest tribe in the world
The Fuckawee tribe....In the long grass you can hear their chant...Where the Fuckawee!
[OC] During his search for the Holy Grail...
King Arthur sent his knights and squires to all four corners of the globe. One of his ships landed in Zimbabwe, and engaged in grueling battle with the local tribe of cannibals for no less than 30 days and 30 nights. The knights had fought long and hard, but ultimately succumbed to the sheer numbers of the tribe.
During the night's celebratory feast, one of the tribesman looked up from his haunch of meat and over to his brother. "Hey, does this taste funny to you?"
His brother took a bite of his meal, chewed for a few seconds and after giving it some thought, replied "You know what?"
"What?"
"...I think we're on the same Page."
Bongo!
A Torphy Hunter and his two aides were captured on a safari. The Tarolupa tribe took them in a caravan of a 100 hunters in wooden cages to their village.
In the village was the Chief. The Chief approached the cages as the hunters lined up in two lines of 50 men. The chief shook his spear at the three men and pointed to the second aide..."Death or Bongo?" The aide fearing for his life chose "Bongo."
He was pulled from the cage and sodomized by each of the hunters and ran away screaming into the jungle.
The Chief approached the second aid thrusting his spear and ask the same question. The response was the same and the man was sodomized and ran screaming into the jungle.
The Chief approached the Trophy Hunter and repeated the question "Death or Bongo?" The Hunter shook his head grimly and said "Death."
The Chief looked confused and then said "Death?" "Death by Bongo!" and the 100 men cheered
Another classic from DeepSpaghetti.org
The Hellarwe tribe.
There's a tribe of pygmies in Africa called the Hellarwe. They're an ancient tribe that settled the tall, savannah grasslands a long time ago and I had the fortune of going to visit them. I actually thought we were lost until I saw a pygmy jump up ahead of us accompanied by his fearsome warcry: "Wherethehellarewe"
An anthropologist travels to the deepest darkest rainforest...
to study a tribe untouched by civilisation.
As he is trecking towards the villiage he starts to hear drumming. The closer he gets, the louder it gets. It's relentless and doesn't seem to stop.
A day later he arrives at the villiage and gets introduced to the eldar. He immediately asks "What are the drums for?"
The eldar simply responds "The drums must never stop."
Throughout the night and the next day the incessent drumming starts to grate on his nerves. He asks around and every member of the tribe answers with "The drums must never stop."
3 days later he has had no sleep and is at a loose end. He approaches the eldar.
"I really have to know about the drums."
"The drums must never stop."
"Yes, yes. I know that. But why?"
The eldar looks at him and says "Bass solo."
An Indian chief goes into town...
For the day to run some errands for the tribe. When he comes back everyone notices that he is carrying a box of things he purchased. Inside they see there is a light bulb.
They found this quite odd, considering they didn't have electricity. Of course, he is the chief so no one questions him. As the day is coming to an end, they are very perplexed about this light bulb. Finally someone asks him, "chief, why did you buy a lightbulb if we have no electricity?"
In response the chief calls together the whole tribe. He gets them to all stand in a big circle. Next he places the lightbulb in the dirt in the exact middle of the circle. Finally he commands everyone to join hands together.
Miraculously, the light immediately begins to illuminate when everyone joined their hands.
The chief then speaks in a very chief ten commanding voice, "many hands make light work."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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A Cherokee chief had three wives, each of whom was pregnant...
The first s**... gave birth to a boy, and the chief was so elated that he built her a teepee made of buffalo hide.
A few days later, the second s**... gave birth, and also to a boy. The chief was extremely happy; he built her a teepee made of antelope hide.
The third s**... gave birth a few days later, but the chief kept the details of the birth a secret.
He built the third wife a teepee out of hippopotamus hide and challenged the people of the tribe to guess the details of the birth. Whoever in the tribe could guess correctly would receive a small prize.
Several people tried, but they were unsuccessful in their guesses. Finally, a young brave came forth and declared that the third wife had delivered twin boys.
"Correct!" cried the chief. "But how did you know?"
"It's simple," replied the warrior. "The value of the s**... of the hippopotamus is equal to the sons of the squaws of the other two hides."
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So this atheist explorer is in trouble...
...with a tribe of savage cannibals. He's cornered with no possible way out when he exclaims in his desperation 'God, I'm s**...!'
Suddenly the clouds part and a booming voice says 'No son, you are not. Take that rock near your right foot and throw it at that old cannibal with the large headdress!'
The explorer obeys, and the chief of the tribe lies dead on the ground.
The voice says 'NOW you're s**...!'
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The m**... and the black sheep
A young m**... travels to Senegal to teach God's way to a local tribe.
Upon reaching the village, he is not well received by the inhabitants, but he slowly and steadily create contact.
After many years he's finally accepted by the people and goes along well with everyone, until one day the chief's daughter gives birth to a white child.
Infuriated but not ungrateful for what the m**... has done for the village, he gives him one chance to explain himself in private.
The young man, who is innocent, tells him "I have nothing to do with it, it is just a hazard of the genetics. It's the same as with sheeps, most of them are white but sometimes a black one is born for no reason".
The chief steps back a little, gives a frightened look to the m**..., then whispers : "Ok, I won't say a word about my daugther, but don't you tell anyone about the sheep"
I'd like to join the Navajo tribe...
I hear they've got great fringe benefits.
Winter weather
The Chief of a Native American tribe calls the weather service and asks "How harsh will the winter be this year?" The meteorologist replies "Oh, it should be a bit cold and snowy." The Chief sends the men from his tribe to the forest to gather some wood for the winter.
A couple weeks later, he calls again to double-check, and asks the same thing. He is told "We expect the winter to be quite cold and snowy," so he sends them again to get a lot of wood.
Another week goes by, he calls once again and hears "It will be crazy! The Indians are gathering wood like mad!"
The Fakarwee tribe
A: Did you know that the Pygmies in Africa are called the Fakarwee Tribe?
B: No I didn't. But why are they called that?
A: Because when they are in long grass they jump up and down calling out, "where the fak-ar-we?
The Albino and the Black Sheep
A professor is sent to darkest Africa to live with a primitive tribe. He spends years with them, teaching them reading, writing, math and science. One day the wife of the tribe's chief gives birth to a white child.
The tribe is shocked, and the chief pulls the professor aside and says, "Look here! You're the only white man we've ever seen and this woman gives birth to a white child. It doesn't take a genius to figure out what happened!"
The professor replied, "No, Chief. You're mistaken. What you have here is a natural occurrence, what we in the civilized world call an albino! Look at that field over there. All of the sheep are white except for one black one. Nature does this on occasion." The chief was silent for a moment, then said, "Ok, ok, you no tell anyone, I no tell anyone."
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b**...
Three guys are captured by a tribe of natives in a far off land. They are brought before the tribal leader who gives them a choice. He says, "what will you have, death or b**...?".
The first guys thinks, hmmm wonder what b**... is. "I'll take the b**...". The tribal leader says, "good". Then a dozen tribal members line up and give it to him in the rear. The tribal leader turns to the second guy and gives him the choice, death, or b**.... The second guy thinks, hmm, that b**... thing is pretty n**.... But death is permanent, "I'll take the b**...". Tribal leader says, "good", and a hundred tribesmen line up and give him the b**....
The tribal leader gives the choice to the third captive. He thinks for a while, hmm, first it was a dozen, then it was a hundred. Heck with it, "I'll take death". The tribal leader says, "good, death .... by b**...".
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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A m**... goes to Africa...
A m**... goes to Africa and was living with a tribe. While he was there, a white baby was born. The tribe's chief goes to the m**... and asks, "how do you explain this white baby? You're the only white man here, this doesn't seem right...". The m**... looks around and tries to come up with an excuse. "Uhh well, you see... Uhm...see the sheep there? All of them have white wool, except for that one that's black... Its just nature." The chief looks at him then says " oh I see how it is... If I don't tell you won't tell..."
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An Englishman, a Frenchman and an American are captured by cannibals.
The leader of the tribe comes up to them and says, "Even though you are about to killed, your deaths will not be in vain. Every part of your body will be used.
Your flesh will be eaten, for my people are hungry.
Your hair will be woven into clothing, for my people are n**....
Your bones will be ground up and made into medicine, for my people are sick.
Your skin will be stretched over canoe frames, for my people need transportation.
We are a fair people, and we offer you a chance to kill yourself with our ceremonial knife."
...
The Englishman accepts the knife and yells, "God Save the
Queen", while plunging the knife into his heart.
The Frenchman removes the knife from the fallen body, and
yells, "Vive la France", while plunging the knife into his heart.
The American removes the knife from the fallen body, and yells,
while stabbing himself all over his body, "Here's your lousy canoe!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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Black Sheep
A m**... is sent into the deepest part of Africa to live with a tribe.
One day, the wife of one of the tribe's noblemen gives birth to a white baby.
The village chief confronts the m**...: "You have taught us of the evils of s**... sin, yet here, a black woman gives birth to a white child. You are the only white man who has ever set foot in our village!"
The m**... replies, "No, no. You are mistaken. What you have here is a natural occurrence, what is called an albino. Look over at that field. See the flock of white sheep? - and yet amongst them one of them is black. Nature does this on occasion."
"Tell you what," the chief says, "I won't tell on you .. you don't tell on me."
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A man is captured by a tribe in New-Guinea
He is brought before the chief. The Chief, surrounded by the entire tribe, looks down and says to him.
Chief: "You have trespassed on our land, you have two choices, death, or **Bubbaluba**."
Man: "Bubbaluba doesn't sound so bad, what is it?"
A tribesman went up to the man and whispered in his ear. The man's expression quickly turned into one of horror.
"Death! I choose death! Anything but Bubbaluba!"
The Chief sat up and and cried to the crowd.
"DEATH! DEATH! DEATH BY BUBBALUBA!"
Why did the Eskimo leave his tribe?
He wasn't Inuit anymore.
African tribe
There is a tribe in Africa called the faqawi tribe. Their average height is 3 ft tall and the grass where they live is 5 ft tall. They get their name from the sound they make as they jump up and down " Were the faqawi ? were the faqawi ?"
A professor is sent to darkest Africa to live with a primitive tribe...
..He spends years with them, teaching them reading, writing, maths and science.
One day the wife of the tribe's chief gives birth to a white child. The tribe is shocked, and the chief pulls the professor aside and says, "Look here! You're the only white man we've ever seen and this woman gives birth to a white child. It doesn't take a genius to figure out what happened!"
The professor replied, "No, Chief. You're mistaken. What you have here is a natural occurrence, what we in the civilized world call an albino! Look at that field over there. All of the sheep are white except for one black one. Nature does this on occasion."
The chief was silent for a moment, then said, "Tell you what. You don't say anything more about that sheep and I won't say anything more about that white child."
A man is sent to live amongst a tribe in Africa.
After settling in to his new lodgings he hears a loud set of pipes playing near the tribes village. He asks one of the tribe members what the pipe music is for and he answers, "Nobody know for sure, just that very bad thing happen when they stop." The man begins to worry about what this bad thing could be but after a few days of constant pipe music he begins to settle down but is still curious. However, after a week amongst the tribe, as he was out hunting with a tribe member he hears the pipes begin to die down. Terrified, he asks the tribe member, "What happens now?".
The tribesman covers his ears and whispers, " Drum solo."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's the difference between a tribe of pygmy cannibals and the girls cross country team?
The pygmy cannibals are cunning runts.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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A European m**... goes to an African tribe...
... and asks the tribeleader if he may stay with them. The leader agrees on one condition: No white child can be born.
However, 9 months later, a woman is discovered with a white child.
The leader summons the missonary to explain himself. The m**... looks out the window and shows the leader a herd of sheep and says:
" As you can see, all the sheep are white, yet one of them is black... "
In complete distress, the tribeleader exclaims: " Allright, I won't say anything about your child, as long as you don't say anything about the sheep!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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Big Chief, No f**....
In a small Native community the Medicine Man is making a potion when Big Chief of the Tribe who is suffering from severe constipation walks in and says
"Big Chief No f**..."
The Medicine man Gives him a Potion from the shelf. Big Chief walks away.
The next day Big Chief walks in again and says
"Big Chief No f**..."
The medicine man this time prepares a fresh potion and gives it to Big Chief, Big Chief walks away.
The following day Big Chief walks into the medicine man's hut in severe stomach pain and crying he says.
"Big Chief No f**...!"
This time the medicine man starts to throw every ingredient he has, including eye of newt into the p**.... and gives Big Chief the potion. Big chief walks away.
five minutes later Big Chief's Wife runs into the medicine man's hut yelling.
"Big f**..., No Chief!"
How the Fukarwe Indians got their Name:
The Fukarwe Indians lived in Utah about 2,000 years ago.
They were a peaceful tribe and lived in Teepees on the prarie.
One day it started raining heavily.......and kept on raining.
The prarie started to flood and they were forced to move to higher ground.
And the rain kept coming......and the tribe had to move to higher and higher ground.
Until they found themselves at the top of a mountain.
And the Chief raised his hands to the Sky and shouted.
Where the Fukarwe!!!!..........z
One day in class...
The teacher called 3 native boys and asked which tribe they were from. The first boy said "I am Souix". The second boy said " I am Cherokee". The third boy said "I am Fukowi". Confused, the teacher asked "How do you know?" The boy responded "I was walking with my father on a mountain top, when he stopped, looked around and said 'We're the Fukawi'".
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Two english men
Two english men discover a forbidden island and come across a tribe of big masculine men.
The tribe takes the english men hostage and offer them one of two options; death or bullar.
The english men ask "what is bullar?"
The leader of the tribe states "each of us get to take turns r**... you. So what'll it be?"
The first english man goes "well i dont want to die, so i guess i choose bullar" and each member of the tribe has a go at him.
The second english man says "well that looked terrible so i guess i choose death"
The tribes people yell "okay, death by bullar"
How did the heckawii indians get their name?
They split off from a larger tribe and fallowed a river, they walked for weeks and months until finally coming to a great plain, the Indian chief looked at the medicine man and said "where the heck are we?"
My dad told me today that we're distantly related to the Fugarwii Tribe of Native Americans.
This tribe was nomadic, and would wander all over the continental US. Unfortunately, as a tribe, they had a terrible sense of direction and would often get horribly lost.
The Fugarwii had scouts who's soul purpose was to remedy this: they would scout about, find the tallest mountain they could, and scale the mountain to its peak.
Once there, they would look about with their hand over their eyes like a visor. Then, the lead scout would turn to face the others and say "where the Fugarwii"
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b**... b**...
Two adventurers were captured by a tribe in the jungle.
The chief asked the first one: "Decide your fate: Death or b**... b**..."
He answered: "I choose b**... b**..." and was r**... by the whole tribe.
So the chief asked the second adventurer: "Death or b**... b**...".
He answered: "I choose death"
The chief: "Well, so it shall be. Death by b**... b**...!"
Kendrick Lamars New Song
Chris Don't Kill My Tribe, in honor of Columbus Day
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A German, American and a Mexican g**... captured by a tribe
An American, Mexican and German get captured by a tribe.
The Tribemaster says to the German: "Choose what we shall put on your back before we start whipping you."
The German has decided: "Pour fresh beer all over me!"
So thats what they did, and whipped the German untill he died.
Next they walk to the Mexican and ask the same question.
"I dont need anything." he says, proudly.
They keep whipping his back, but he endured everything.
And thats when they ask the same question to the American.
"What do you want on your back?"
The American responds "The Mexican."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
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m**... in the jungle
A m**... lives with a tribe in the jungle, when one day the Chief of the tribe approaches him:
"You are the only white man around here, and now my daughter gave birth to a white child! Explain yourself, or prepare to die!"
The m**... hesitates for a moment, then replies:
"The nature is full of wonders. Look at those sheep over there. They are all white, except for one single lamb which is black."
The Chief: "... If you keep quiet, then I will too.
A hunter tribe in Siberia catches a Camel.
They kill it, and wonder what it is. To find out, they ask the best hunter.
He answers "It is not a fox, it is not a rabbit. Ask the chief of the tribe, he might know".
They ask the chief.
He says, "Not a reindeer, and not a seal. I don't know what it is".
As a last resort they ask the shaman priest. They walk into his tent, and find him sitting on a chair with a ton of smoke around him.
The hunters are not startled, as that is standard stuff. They finally ask him what it is, and the priest answers without delay
"Come on guys its Camel you have to smoke it"
There is an isolated indigenous tribe that lives in the Amazon.
What's interesting about them is that in their language they only have words for numbers 1 and 2, and every number higher than 2 is just 'many'. You have 3 kids? You have many kids, You caught 20 fish? You caught many fish.
I guess trying to come up with words for three numbers was just one too many.
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Dr visits an Indian Tribe
A big city doctor visits an Indian tribe full of men, he asks "How do you guys relieve your s**... tension?" "Simple, just come down to the river tomorrow and we'll show you." The next day the doctor shows up and sees a group of men near a donkey. One man says "Since you're our guest you get to go first." The doctor not wanting to go against custom starts to kiss, then proceeds to have s**... with the donkey. Then a man in the group asks "Are you almost done Doc?" "We need the donkey to cross the river in order to get to the tribe of women."
