Tree Trunk Jokes
35 tree trunk jokes and hilarious tree trunk puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about tree trunk that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Tree Trunk Short Jokes
Short tree trunk jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The tree trunk humour may include short tree stand jokes also.
- What does a tree do when he's going on a vacation? He packs his trunk and leaves.
I should go back to studying now. K bye. - I'm a chameleon. Somehow wedged myself between a brick and a tree trunk. Brown to the left of me. Ochre to the right. Here I am stuck in a middle-ish hue.
- Three Blind Men Three blind men were disputing whether an elephant was like a snake, wall, or a tree trunk.
Meanwhile, three blind elephants agreed that humans were a kind of gooey paste. - Mark Zuckerberg tries to plant a tree, but falls over and crushes in face into the trunk Face Plant (tm)
- Important note Important note from a car manual:
Backing rapidly at a tree significantly reduces your trunk space. - What happens when a tree gets really anxious about its first swimming lesson? It soils its trunks.
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Tree Trunk One Liners
Which tree trunk one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with tree trunk? I can suggest the ones about tree grows and tree branch.
- Why does a surfing tree not drown? Because it wears Wooden Trunks!
- What job position do tree trunks have? They are branch managers
- How do you know a palm tree is getting old? It's coconuts hang lower than its trunk.
- If I carved a sheep from this tree trunk, would you buy it bro? Wood ewe?!
- What's a tree's favorite part of a car? The trunk
- What did one tree say to the other? Nice trunks.
- What happens when a tree goes to the bar? It gets trunk
- What do you get when you boil tree trunks with sugar? Log jam.
- [Cringe Alert] Why are Trees never invited to a formal dinner ? They only wear Trunks.
- Your mom is so fat She's the trunk of the family tree
Laughter Tree Trunk Jokes for Everyone for Fun and Frivolity
What funny jokes about tree trunk you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean tree root jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make tree trunk pranks.
What's my dog's favourite part of the tree?
The bark.
What's my bank's favourite part of the tree?
The branches.
What's my elephant's favourite part of the tree?
The trunk.
What's my father's favourite part of the tree?
The leaves :(
Noah and the snakes
According to the Bible, Noah built an ark and brought a pair of each animals on board to survive a flood. When the ark ran aground Noah told the animals to go forth and multiply.
The snakes told Noah We can't multiply, we're adders.
Noah gathered some driftwood tree trunks and built a platform for the snakes. Even adders can multiply when given a log table.
You might have to be older than me to understand this. People on reddit who are older than me are rare, but they exist.
A divine mathematical story
After creating the world, the Lord looked at it and he said to the animals "Go forth and multiply!"
The snakes came to him and said "Oh Lord, please forgive us, we cannot do as you command, for we are adders".
The Lord turned to the trees and said "Fall over and build furniture from your trunk, because adders can multiply with the aid of log tables".
Words of the Lord of math.
An elderly man takes his grandson golfing,
Once they were at their first hole the grandfather remarks, y'know when I was your age I could hit the ball right over that big ash tree over yonder. The boy looks and sees it is quite a hit and not wanting to be out done he whacks one right dead center and it sticks right in the trunk. As he stood there impressed by his grandfathers feat, the man finished his comment, 'course when I was your age that tree was 'bout 3 feet tall
I couldn't remember what the brown rough stuff was on the outside layer of tree trunks...
I asked my cat and she said, "Meow". No help.
I asked my bird and he said, "Tweet". Useless.
I asked my dog and they said "Rhytidome, you buffoon."
A truck driver sees a n**... man tied to a tree off to the side of the road.
He pulls his rig to the side and approaches the man. The man says to him, "Oh, thank God you're here. I pulled into a gas station to get some gas. I was robbed at gun point, thrown into the trunk of my car and then driven here. Then they stripped me of all of my clothes, took my wedding ring and drove off."
The truck driver shook his head, lowered his fly and said, "This just isn't your day, is it."
An Irish, a British, and American soldiers...
...had just helped each other escape from an Axis prisoner camp in WW2 Germany. As they run through the Bavarian forest, they hear alarms sounding, and soon afterwards, they hear dogs barking and guards yelling to each other.
The barking and yelling gets louder and louder, and the escapees realize that they'll be caught if they keep on running, and decide to take cover by climbing up separate trees.
The dogs start circling the tree, and jumping up and down around the trunk on the very tree the American has climbed. The guards shout "Come down or we'll shoot!" Thinking quickly, he quickly calls down "who! who!" The German guards say to each other "Das ist eine owl", and call the dogs off.
The dogs follow the trail to the second tree, and the guards call up "Come down or we'll shoot!" The Brit calls down "CAW! CAW!!!" The guards say "Ahh. Das ist eine crow".
The guards follow the dogs to the third tree where the Irishman had climbed. Again they called up "Come down or we'll shoot!" The Irishman thought for a moment and then called down "Moo! Moo!"
***NOT MINE: ** Shamelessly stolen from an Irish joke book I had as a kid. Yes, I am Irish.*
A snail starts a slow climb up the trunk of an apple tree.
He is watched by a sparrow who can't help laughing and eventually says "Don't you know there aren't any apples on the tree yet?"
"Yes," said the snail, "but there will be by the time I get up there."
Tarzan learns about s**...
When Jane initially met Tarzan in the jungle, she was attracted to him.
And during her questions about his life, she asked him how he had s**...?
Tarzan not know s**... he replied.
Jane explained to him what s**... was.
Tarzan said ....Tarzan use knot hole in trunk of tree.
Horrified Jane said,Tarzan you have it all wrong, but I will show you how to do it properly.
She took off her clothing and laid down on the ground.
Here she said, pointing to her privates,you must put it in here.
Tarzan removed his l**... cloth, showing Jane his considerable manhood, stepped closer to her and kicked her in the c**...!
Jane rolled around in agony for what seemed like an eternity.
Eventually she managed to grasp for air and screamed What did you do that for?
Tarzan replied, Check for squirrel.