Tramps Jokes

What are some Tramps jokes?

Ladies and gentlemen

Ladies and gentlemen, hobos and tramps

Crosseyed mosquitos and bowlegged ants

I've come to tell you a lie that is true.


One fine day in the middle of the night

Two dead boys rose up to fight.

Back to back they faced each other

Pulled out knives and shot each other.

Two deaf policemen heard the noise

And ran to save the two dead boys.

If you don't believe this lie is true

Go ask the blind man, he saw it too.

The Oxymoron poem

Ladies and Gentlemen; hobos and Tramps; bug eyed mosquitos and legged ants: I come here before you to stand behind you to tell you a story I know nothing of.

One cold dark day in the middle of the night two dead boys stood up to fight, back to back they face each other, drew their swords and shot each-other! The deaf policeman heard this noise and came and killed those two dead boys.

Now if you don't believe this lie is true, ask the blind man, he saw it to.

A tramp walks into a pub and asks for a toothpick.

The barman sees no harm in this and so gives him a toothpick. The tramp then leaves the pub.

A couple of minutes later another tramp enters the bar and asks for a toothpick. The barman obliges and the tramp goes on his way.

The same thing happens three more times in the next 10 minutes. The barman is perplexed. another tramp walks in, this time asking for a straw.

The confused barman's curiosity gets the better of him so he asks "For the last quarter of an hour, tramps have been coming in asking me for toothpicks, then you come in asking for a straw. Why?"

The tramp replies "Well, someones been sick outside and all the best bits have gone."

How to make Tramps jokes?

We have collected gags and puns about Tramps to have fun with. Do you want to stand out in a crowd with a good sense of humour joking about Tramps? If Yes here are a lot more hilarious lines and funny Tramps pick up lines to share with friends.

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