Trampoline Jokes

So I got my friend a trampoline, and he's being so ungrateful.

He didn't even thank me. He just sat in his wheelchair and cried smh.

Sweet Baby Jokes (philanthropic concept reversal)

What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline?
The trampoline doesn't look awfully cute in a sailor's outfit.

Did you know that trampolines used to actually be called jumpolines?

That is, until 1982 when your mom got on one.

What do you call a p**... with one leg shorter than the other?

A Trampoline.

Whats the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?

You take your shoes off to jump on the trampoline.

I thought my son would be glad and appreciate that I got him a trampoline

But nooo, all he does is sit and cry in his wheelchair all day

My girlfriend is like a trampoline,...

...i dont have a trampoline!

I met the inventor of the trampoline.

He's an all round nice guy, but a bit jumpy.

What do you get when you cross a cow with a trampoline?

A milkshake!

What's the difference between a trampoline and a baby?

I take my shoes off when I jump on a trampoline

I bought my son a trampoline

But all he wanted to do was sit and cry in his wheelchair
- This was a repost but I thought it was too funny not to share

A man is injured after falling at a trampoline park

Doctors are confident he'll soon bounce back.

I just joined the mile-high club.

Very few people are that skilled on a trampoline.

A friend of mine opened a trampoline business in Prague.

I asked him how sales were and said "Well, the Czechs keep bouncing."

I swapped our double bed for a trampoline

When my wife found out, she hit the roof

My Son is such a c**t...

I bought him a new trampoline for christmas and all he wants to do is sit in his wheelchair and cry.

Last night, I put a trampoline in place of my wifes bed.

When she found out, she hit the roof.

What do my trampoline and my girlfriend have in common?

I don't have a trampoline

I put my foot through a trampoline last week...

I've had a spring in my step ever since.

Analogies Are like bagels on a trampoline:

They don't always work.

I thought my son would like that I bought him a trampoline, but oh sweet marry no.

Welp he just wants to sit. And cry in his wheelchair.

Bought my son a trampoline for his birthday

All he does is scream about wanting back in his wheelchair

The man who invented the trampoline died today.

His family remembers his last words... Look what I can do.

I got my kid a trampoline and he doesn't even play in it

He just sits in his wheelchair and cries, so ungrateful.

I was chatting to my mate from Liverpool.

Me: So what have you got your kids for Christmas?
Him: I got the youngest a trampoline and the
other 2 a bike each I found on the internet.
Me: What website were they on?
Him: Google Earth Street View.

I bought a trampoline for my son on his birthday but i guess he didn't like it

he's just sitting in his wheelchair crying. kids these days are so ungrateful.

I've got a business...

What's you business?
A trampoline company in Prague.
How's it going?
It's not great, the Czech's keep bouncing...
What's your business?
We repair elevators in high rise buildings.
How's it going?
Meh, it's up and down.
What's your business?
...
Carry it on!

I gifted trampoline to my son on his 7th birthday

I think he was so happy he bust into tears. He cried so hard that he fell out of his wheelchair

I bought my son a trampoline for his birthday.

That ungrateful s**... just sat in his wheelchair and cried the whole time.

I had a friend who worked as a trampoline salesman for several years. I once asked him how that line of work was…

To which he replied It has its ups and downs .

Did you hear about the plane that crashed into the trampoline factory?

Witnesses heard a loud Boeing!

I bought my son a trampoline for his birthday

He was so ungrateful, didn't even give it a go. He just sat in his wheelchair and cried

I was the first person to install trampolines on musician's tour buses.

Now everybody is jumping on the bandwagon.

A man walks into a bar and sees a trampoline.

"What do you got this here for?" He asks.
The bartender replies: "it's for the bouncer."

I traded my bed for a trampoline.

My wife hit the roof!

What was the original name for a trampoline?

It was called a jumpoline until your mom used it.

A case study has found trampolines are involved in half of all ER admissions for under-14's.

The authors said the problem is tumbling out of control.

My wife was depressed so I bought her a trampoline to cheer her up

She's doing much better now but she still has her ups and downs.

I'm going to travel to Prague

Once there, I will enter a bank, and cover the floor with trampolines.
They'll have to deal with a bunch of bouncing Czechs.

What’s the difference between an accordion and a trampoline? You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.

What’s the difference between an accordion and a trampoline? You take your shoes off before you jump on a trampoline, but you don’t before you jump on an accordion.

What’s the difference between an accordion and a trampoline? You’re supposed to take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.