Traffic Sign Jokes
20 traffic sign jokes and hilarious traffic sign puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about traffic sign that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Traffic Sign Short Jokes
Short traffic sign jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The traffic sign humour may include short road sign jokes also.
- Bad pun #3 I didn't want to believe my dad was stealing from his job as a traffic cop but when I got home all the signs were there.
- I didn't want to believe that my uncle had been stealing from the roads and traffic department ... ... but when the police raided his apartment, all the signs were there.
- Which traffic sign allows you to make a U-turn on a highway in the US? Welcome to louisiana
- Stop signs are red, traffic lights are green, I ride a bicycle, and have no idea what that means.
- I saw a man the other day arguing with a traffic sign The sign looked incredibly uncomfortable. It really wanted him to Stop.
- A guy got run over by the PopeMobile yesterday. I guess he didn't see the sign that said "Cross traffic does not stop."
- Why does the Islamic State use knives as traffic signs? So they be-heading in the right direction.
- TIL the musical group Ace of Base was killed in a horrific traffic accident after they missed their exit on the highway and crashed... Police later said, "they didn't see the sign..."
- My buddy got fired from the road department He was accused of stealing traffic signals.
When the cops went to his house, all the signs were there. - Why did Trump stage a photo op of him winning a marathon against a bunch of traffic signs? To show that he was leading the poles
Share These Traffic Sign Jokes With Friends
Traffic Sign One Liners
Which traffic sign one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with traffic sign? I can suggest the ones about stop sign and traffic light.
- What traffic sign does the Invisible Man always obey? "Keep clear."
- I tried telling a traffic sign to turn. It said "No, ... U Turn"
Traffic Sign Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about traffic sign you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean parking sign jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make traffic sign pranks.
A man parks his car. As he is getting out a traffic warden walks up and says, "I'm sorry sir, you can't park your car here." .....
...."Yes I can" says the man. "The sign there says, 'Fine for Parking'!"
A policeman stops a car that is going very slowly on the I40 highway, and says to the driver "Why are you going so slow? You're holding up traffic!"
"Well," says the man, "the signs say I40."
"That's the road number," says the policeman, "not the speed limit."
Then he notices a woman in the back seat, trembling all over. "Is your passenger all right, sir?" he asks.
"Don't worry officer," says the man, "my wife is always like that when we come off Hwy I170."
An elderly classical languages professor goes to Rome for a conference.
He hails a taxi as he leaves the airport, and the driver points to a sign saying "Tell driver your destination". The professor hesitates for a moment. He doesn't speak Italian, but doesn't want the driver to misunderstand his directions in English. Suddenly realizing that Italian is descended from Latin he says, "Adducere me ad Marriott deversorium"
The cab driver nods and puts the car in gear. As he into traffic he says, "Wow, you sure haven't been to Rome for a long time."
Traffic stop
A car slows down at a stop sign and keeps driving. A cop sees him and pulls him over.
The cop asks, "Why didn't you stop?"
The man says, "I slowed down."
The cop pulls out his nightstick and starts beating him. "Now," the cop says, "do you want me to stop or slow down?"
A man bought a new car.
Next day he is driving his car to office.
On the way he was waiting for the Signal.
Suddenly he opened the door and got down.
Then he went to the Traffic Police and asked him, "How much should I pay to turn right?"
The Policeman was astonished and asked, "Why are you asking like this?"
Then man showed him the sign board which was in the corner of the road: "Free Left Turn"
A police officer pulls over a car
A police officer follows a car for many miles, and surprisingly for him, the driving is just perfect. The driver obeys all traffic signs, blinks when necessary, does not speed. The police officer is surprised and pulls over the car. In the car there is a family - a guy driving, his wife in the passenger seat and his mother-in-law sleeping in the back seat.
The guy rolls down the window "Is there a problem officer?"
"Hello, Sir. I see that your driving is perfect and pulled you over to thank you. May I inform you that you won this months $ 5000 safest driver award. Here is the check. What do you want to do with this money?"
The guy: "Wow thanks man, I am going to buy me a driving license"
Guys wife: "Don't listen to him officer, he always acts s**... when he's drunk and s**..."
The mother-in-law wakes up and sees the police officer "Jack, I told you we wouldn't get far in a stolen car"
Suddenly, the trunk pops and the father-in-law appears "Are we over the border yet?"