Tow Truck Jokes

25 tow truck jokes and hilarious tow truck puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about tow truck that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Tow Truck Short Jokes

Short tow truck jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The tow truck humour may include short car towed jokes also.

  1. I passed a tow truck and the poor driver was crying his eyes out. I thought "He's headed for a breakdown"
  2. Car broke down in Alaska When the tow truck arrived the driver said It appears you blew a seal
    Guy said no, that's just mayonnaise, I ate a sandwich while waiting
  3. Who does the tow truck call? Who does the tow truck call when they break down?
    The foot truck.
  4. Tow truck drivers must see a lot of action. They can hook up with anybody on the street and take them home.
  5. Did you know there was a decision made at Ford to stop producing tow trucks? They finally realized a tow truck couldn't be expected to tow itself
  6. Elon Musk is so rich his his tow-truck is a rocket ship, his parking garage is space, and he can afford an unlimited data plan with no throttling! Yea I mean like no buffering at all.
  7. I met a tow truck driver once. When introduced his massive hand swallowed mine like it was nothing.

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Tow Truck One Liners

Which tow truck one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with tow truck? I can suggest the ones about car towing and towed.

  1. You hear about the snail who had to call a tow truck? He couldn't make 'is car go
  2. Who do you call if you got a sore toe? Tow Truck.
  3. What do you call an army tow-truck? Camotow

Tow Truck joke, What do you call an army tow-truck?

The Funniest Tow Truck Jokes for a Bone-Shaking Laugh

What funny jokes about tow truck you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean pickup truck jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make tow truck pranks.

True story: Many years ago I worked a drive thru fast food place. A tow truck came through with a car hooked up in back. I asked him what I could get for him. The driver asked for a minute to decide.

After a minute I said, Sir, can you hurry up? You're *holding up* the car behind you.

The f**...

A f**... procession pulled into a cemetery. Several carloads of family members followed a black truck towing a boat with a coffin in it.

A passer-by remarked, "That guy must have been a very avid fisherman.

"Oh, he still is," remarked one of the mourners. As a matter of fact, he's headed off to the lake as soon as we bury his wife.

A British man in a Jag is broke down on the side of the road

When the tow truck comes and the driver sees the Jag, he says "Hey you know why the British like warm beer?"
The Jag driver with a complete deadpan look says "I dunno. Why...?"
And the truck driver laughs and says "Because Lucas makes refrigerators too!"

Tow Truck

A man sees an attractive woman on the side of the road. He stops to ask if she needs any help.
The woman says, "Yes, my car has broken down and I don't know what's wrong with it."
The man says, "Don't worry; I'll get you and your car to a mechanic in town. Have you ever been towed before?"
And the woman says, "No, but I've been fingered a couple of times."

I sorted by top of all time and copied and pasted the best joke here

I was just about to hit submit and a tow truck came along and hitched onto the back of my car. I jumped out and screamed, *Why are you towing my car?* The tow driver just stared back at me with this dead look in his eye, not saying a thing. *At least tell me where you're bringing my car*, I begged. The driver slowly turned to me and and said: Repo St.

Three software engineers...

...are riding in a truck that breaks down. They get out, and tries to see what he can see under the hood, but doesn't know anything about cars, another calls a tow truck and waits, and the third says "I don't know what's wrong, let's just get back in the car and see if it happens again"

A tow truck driver is pulling a lady out of the ditch....

He says to her "you are the second pregnant lady I've pulled out of the ditch today". With a bit of confusion she hastily replies "I am not pregnant". He pauses and calmly states "you are not out of the ditch yet".

A f**... procession pulled into a cemetery....

Several carloads of family members pulled followed in a black truck towing a boat with a coffin in it.
A passerby remarked, "That guy must have been an avid fisherman".
"Oh, he still is." replied a mourner. "He's headed off to the lake as soon as we bury his wife."

A penguin is driving alone through the desert...

Along the highway he spots an ice-cream stand and pulls over for a cone. He tries to eat it while driving, but being a penguin and not having any thumbs, he gets most of it all over his face. A few miles down the road there is a loud *BANG*, and his car starts smoking and sputtering. He pulls over and calls a tow truck. The truck driver spends a few minutes looking under the hood and says, "Looks like you blew a seal."
"No no! Its just ice-cream!"

I was following an ambulance today

Going down the road with the lights on and siren blaring. We were on a highway with a high speed limit so I could keep up without being too close.
The ambulance goes around the curve ahead of us and the back door flings open. A cooler rolls out and lands on the side of the road.
I figured they would have saw it but I pulled over where it landed anyway. I got out and picked the cooler up. A little dented but still closed and intact.
I opened the cooler and found it was full of ice, and what appeared to be someone's severed toe. "Surely they noticed the door open and will come back shortly" I thought.
I waited for an hour and no sign of them so I decided to just give up waiting and call a tow truck.

the ambulance and the toe

Last night I was coming home from work in the city, driving country roads to get home.
I looked in my rear view mirror and saw an ambulance with its lights on. I pulled over and as the ambulance passed by, I noticed the back door open up a little. The ambulance hit a small bump and out fell an ice chest.
I quickly pulled off the road and rushed over to the ice chest and opened it up. Inside was a human toe in the ice. I knew I wouldn't be able to catch the ambulance so I got in my car and rushed to the nearest gas station to call 911 (my cell phone was dead). They told me they'd send a car right away but all of their police cars were in use and told me just to wait 20 minutes.
So I waited 20 minutes for the tow truck to show up.


Two salesmen are traveling in the country when their car breaks down. The only house around for miles was a large mansion. They knock on the door and a beautiful widow answers the door. Since it is early evening and the garage will not be opened until morning, she offers to let them spend the night in the guest bedrooms.
In the morning they call the tow truck and leave.
About three months later salesman number one opens a letter and can't believe what he reads. He goes to salesman number two and says:
"When we spent the night at the widow's mansion, did you sneak away into her bedroom in the middle of the night?"
"Why, yes I did."
"And did you use my name?"
"Why, yes how did you know?"
"Well, it seems she died and left me her 5 million dollar estate!"

Tow Truck joke, Incognito