Tow Jokes

46 tow jokes and hilarious tow puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about tow that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Funniest Tow Short Jokes

Short tow jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The tow humour may include short dealership jokes also.

  1. A customer calls AAA about roadside assistance benefits and asks, "How many tows do I get?" Rep says, "Most people are born with 10. That's all you get."
  2. I passed a tow truck and the poor driver was crying his eyes out. I thought "He's headed for a breakdown"
  3. Car broke down in Alaska When the tow truck arrived the driver said It appears you blew a seal
    Guy said no, that's just mayonnaise, I ate a sandwich while waiting
  4. Who does the tow truck call? Who does the tow truck call when they break down?
    The foot truck.
  5. What are your best toe amputation jokes? Co worker lost a toe. Need lots of jokes. Already used up tow jokes about towing his car
  6. It should be a safety hazard for cars being towed to face traffic behind them... Every time I look up from my phone while driving and see one they scare the *s#!t* out of me!
  7. Last night I was driving down an old country road when I hit a pedestrian going 50 mph. It seemed to take forever for help to arrive. That's the last time I use that towing company.
  8. I don't get no respect. Last week my car broke down on the freeway. I asked a guy for a tow. He gave me a finger.
  9. What happens to a desert-dwellers main transportation when it has been parked in one spot for too long? It gets Camel-Towed.
  10. Tow truck drivers must see a lot of action. They can hook up with anybody on the street and take them home.

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Tow One Liners

Which tow one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with tow? I can suggest the ones about bumper and drag.

  1. How does North Korea celebrate Christmas? With missile tows
  2. If you're towing a speedboat... ...are you pulling a fast one?
  3. I want to start a towing company. I'll name it Jaques Crew Tow.
  4. What kind of well is the worst when it's wet? A tow-well
  5. My car wouldn't start so I called my favorite middle eastern company to help me Camel Tow
  6. How many cars does it take to pull another car? Tow
  7. What do you call a desert towing company? A camel tow
  8. What do you call someone with no arms and no legs being towed behind your boat? Skip.
  9. Why do fat girls have belly button rings So we can tow them away from the lunch line
  10. I left a gorilla in a tow zone I ape-haul-ogize
  11. Why did Nobelium's car got towed away? He parked at a *No* parking!
  12. What do you call a giant squid who runs a tow service in Indonesia? A Kraken-towa!
  13. I was told to move, so I started to dance. The police man then towed my car.
  14. What do you call a ford towing another ford? A ford fiesta!
  15. How do you transport large munitions around Christmas time? A missile tow.

Tow Truck Jokes

Here is a list of funny tow truck jokes and even better tow truck puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Did you know there was a decision made at Ford to stop producing tow trucks? They finally realized a tow truck couldn't be expected to tow itself
  • You hear about the snail who had to call a tow truck? He couldn't make 'is car go
  • Elon Musk is so rich his his tow-truck is a rocket ship, his parking garage is space, and he can afford an unlimited data plan with no throttling! Yea I mean like no buffering at all.
  • Who do you call if you got a sore toe? Tow Truck.
  • I met a tow truck driver once. When introduced his massive hand swallowed mine like it was nothing.
  • What do you call an army tow-truck? Camotow

Cheeky Tow Jokes that Will Make You and Your Friends Chuckle

What funny jokes about tow you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean trailer jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make tow pranks.

True story: Many years ago I worked a drive thru fast food place. A tow truck came through with a car hooked up in back. I asked him what I could get for him. The driver asked for a minute to decide.

After a minute I said, Sir, can you hurry up? You're *holding up* the car behind you.

A British man in a Jag is broke down on the side of the road

When the tow truck comes and the driver sees the Jag, he says "Hey you know why the British like warm beer?"
The Jag driver with a complete deadpan look says "I dunno. Why...?"
And the truck driver laughs and says "Because Lucas makes refrigerators too!"

Tow Truck

A man sees an attractive woman on the side of the road. He stops to ask if she needs any help.
The woman says, "Yes, my car has broken down and I don't know what's wrong with it."
The man says, "Don't worry; I'll get you and your car to a mechanic in town. Have you ever been towed before?"
And the woman says, "No, but I've been fingered a couple of times."

I sorted by top of all time and copied and pasted the best joke here

I was just about to hit submit and a tow truck came along and hitched onto the back of my car. I jumped out and screamed, *Why are you towing my car?* The tow driver just stared back at me with this dead look in his eye, not saying a thing. *At least tell me where you're bringing my car*, I begged. The driver slowly turned to me and and said: Repo St.

Three software engineers...

...are riding in a truck that breaks down. They get out, and tries to see what he can see under the hood, but doesn't know anything about cars, another calls a tow truck and waits, and the third says "I don't know what's wrong, let's just get back in the car and see if it happens again"

A tow truck driver is pulling a lady out of the ditch....

He says to her "you are the second pregnant lady I've pulled out of the ditch today". With a bit of confusion she hastily replies "I am not pregnant". He pauses and calmly states "you are not out of the ditch yet".

A salesman's car breaks down

A traveling salesman's car breaks down near an Ohio farmhouse. The salesman knocks on the door and explains his situation to the farmer.
"Well," the farmer says, "Its Friday night, I doubt you can get a tow into town tonight, so I'll let you stay the night. I have only one rule, under no circumstances are you to have s**... with my son."
"I'm sorry," says the salesman. "I'm in the wrong joke."

Yo mama so fat

Tesla model X can't tow her.