Tourist Attractions Jokes
13 tourist attractions jokes and hilarious tourist attractions puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about tourist attractions that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Tourist Attractions Short Jokes
Short tourist attractions jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The tourist attractions humour may include short tourist attraction jokes also.
- The Ukrainian government is opening up a tourist attraction in Chernobyl. It will be like Disney World, except the six foot tall mouse is real.
- A tourist asks a Scottish villager "Do you have a local attraction?"
"We used to- he answers- but she got married." - I was recently in Belfast and saw a tourist attraction called "The Titanic Experience". It's great. When you walk in the door they slam you in the face with a big chunk of ice.
- What do you call an attractive girl in Poland A tourist.
Or swap in Poland for wherever, spread the love. - Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked the turbines of Hoover Dam.
Since then, the Colorado River is a tourist attraction. - A tourist asked me for some local attractions. So I told him that my next door neighbours are rather s**....
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Tourist Attractions One Liners
Which tourist attractions one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with tourist attractions? I can suggest the ones about tourist and tourist guide.
- What's a ghost's favorite tourist attraction? The BOO-seum.
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Tourist Attractions Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about tourist attractions you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean tour guide jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make tourist attractions pranks.
The year is 2192. The British Prime Minister visits Brussels to ask for an extension of the Brexit deadline.
No one remembers where this tradition originated, but every year it attracts many tourists from all over the world.
Two ladies in a pub in attract the attention of a fellow down the bar with their accents.
Two ladies in a pub in attract the attention of a fellow down the bar with their accents.
"Ah, tourists eh? Do you girls want to hear a joke about Scotland?"
"It's Wales actually."
"Alright. Do you whales want to hear a joke about Scotland?"
I went on a vacation to Taiwan...
I asked around for tourist attractions
A peculiar man came up to me, inquiring about some \*discount\* s**... shop
When in Taiwan, am I right? Needless to say I was intrigued.
He said to me, "go down to da beach,
aska bout da tongue twister packege
my friend will make you happy"
So I went to the beach, as the man had suggested. I asked about the tongue twister package. I was not disappointed. If you're ever in Taiwan, make sure to visit that guy at the beach.
He sells shemales at the seashore.
Oh, a joke standing still indeed!
A philosopher, a tree, and an elephant resided along the shore of a lake. As time passed, the philosopher, the tree, and the elephant became thirsty. The philosopher, not knowing how or where to drink safely, observed the elephant. He watched as the animal moved away from the shore into deeper waters. The elephant proceeded to drink the water surrounding itself. This was of no help to the philosopher, as swimming towards the deep waters of the lake would have proved dangerous due to predatory animals. The philosopher sought to observe the habits of the tree, but its roots were too far underground to analyze, and the different way of utilizing water made the task of understanding the system impossible to complete with only direct observation by a human. Feeling defeated, the philosopher pondered, If I cannot even keep myself healthy, why value the advanced intellect I possess over these creatures? . The intellectual grew tired, so he made his way out of the man-made safari; he drank from a water fountain close to the exit and continued by walking out of the tourist attraction.
You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk.
You think "taking out the trash" means taking your in-laws to a movie.
You take a load to the dump and bring back more than you took.
You let your twelve-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of her kids.
You ever cut your grass and found a car.
The Halloween pumpkin on your front porch has more teeth than your wife.
Your wife can climb a tree faster than your cat.
You think taking a bubble bath starts with eating beans for dinner.
You've got more than one brother named 'Darryl'.
You own a homemade fur coat.
The people on j**... Springer's show remind you of your neighbors.
You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.
You can get dog hair from out of your belly button.
The beer can collection in the town museum is the big tourist attraction.
People hear your car a long time before they see it.