The Best 33 Toronto Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Toronto jokes. There are some toronto flight jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these toronto toronto maple leafs puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Toronto Jokes and Puns

Where's the red light district in Toronto?

Behind the Maple Leafs' net.

Missing South Africa

In Toronto I saw a bumper sticker on a parked car that read:
"I miss South Africa."

So I broke the window, took the radio and left a note that read:
"I hope this helps."

Why are housing prices in Toronto falling?

Because the market got flooded.

Toronto joke, Why are housing prices in Toronto falling?

How many Toronto Mayors does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Just Rob Ford. He can screw up anything.

What do you call a crackhead?

Mayor of Toronto


How is digging fence post holes like being the mayor of Toronto?

It goes pretty smoothly until you start hitting the rock.

Rob Ford too his Ex-Lax with Red Bull

Rob Ford too his Ex-Lax with Red Bull.
Now he's flying over Toronto raining down diarrhea.

Toronto joke, Rob Ford too his Ex-Lax with Red Bull

What do the Titanic and The Toronto Maple Leafs have in common...

They both look great until they hit the ice.

What do Toronto Maple Leaf fans and Palestinians have in common?

They both wish it was 1967.

Why did Toronto host the (hockey) World Junior Championships?

They wanted to see what a winning team looked like.

Why do Newfies want Québec to separate?

So it's a shorter drive to Toronto!

You can explore toronto forecast reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean toronto lax dad jokes. There are also toronto puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


I can't believe the Toronto maple leafs even have a website

They can't even put THREE W's together!

Ah Toronto, the only city where the leaves fall in autumn...

...and the Leafs fall in the spring

How many Toronto Maple Leaf fans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Nobody knows.

They always say they'll do it next year.

Why is Riot Fest going to be in Toronto?

They play music, not hockey.

What's the difference between a line of cocaine and Toronto Maple Leafs tickets?

People would pass up the Leafs tickets.

Toronto joke, What's the difference between a line of cocaine and Toronto Maple Leafs tickets?

Why is the Hockey Hall of Fame in Toronto?

It's the only way a Leafs will get to see the Stanley Cup.

What's the difference between a Toronto Maple Leafs fan and a 14-year old girl?

Nothing. They are both just waiting for the first period to be over.

What do the Titanic and The Toronto Maple Leafs have in common...

The last picture of the Titanic was in Black&White, so was the last picture of the Maple Leafs with the Stanley Cup


The cubs should be thankful they played Cleveland and not Toronto

as Aroldis Chapman likes to keep his beatings Domestic.

Why was the Newfie excited when he heard Quebec might leave Canada?

It wouldn't take him as long to drive to Toronto

What is the similarity between the Titanic and the Toronto Maple Leaves?

They looked pretty good until they hit the ice.

Intellectuals know that the Earth revolves around the Sun...

Canadians know that the universe revolves around Toronto

Why can't the Toronto Raptors buy gatorades from the vending machine in their dressing room?

Because they always come up empty on the 4th quarter.

Remain Calm :)

An Emergency Call Centre worker has been fired in Toronto much to the dismay of her colleagues, who were unhappy with her dismissal.

It seems that a caller dialled 911 from a cell phone stating, "I am depressed and lying on a railway line so that when the train comes I can finally meet Allah."

To which the call centre employee replied, "Remain calm and stay on the line

TIL that Fred Rogers never got to visit Toronto.

He had to use his imagination to travel to the Land of Maple Leafs.

Police are looking for a woman caught on video in Toronto throwing a chair off her high rise balcony...

If they catch her, she'll probably get the chair.

They have announced a new Lone Ranger Movie.

The Lone Ranger Goes To Canada
or Onto Toronto Pronto Tonto.

How to fix a broken vacuum.

If you ever come a cross a broken vacuum, put a toronto maple leaf hockey jersey on it.

It will start sucking right away.

Under Kennedy, America went to the moon...

Under Trump, America can't even get to Canada.



Much love from Toronto, stay safe!

My 91 year old Canadian Grandmother just told me this joke.

Two Newfoundlanders were driving to Toronto.
They passed a sign that said: Toronto LEFT.
Distraught, they turned around and drove back home.

How did a Chinese guy have a Tamil name:

I recently met a Chinese man in Toronto and got to know that his name was "Kannaswami .

I asked him, "How did you ever get a name like that being a Chinese?"

He said -"Many, many years ago when I first went to Canada, I was standing in line at the Political Asylums Immigration Counter. The man in front of me was a Sri Lankan Tamil refugee.

The white lady at the counter looked at him and asked "What is your name?"

He replied "Kannaswami".

Then she looked at me and asked "What's your name?"

I said, "Sem Ting".

Why is the Hockey Hall Of Fame situated in Toronto?

So that Leafs fans can remember what a Stanley cup looks like.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the toronto northwest jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working toronto toronto maple leaf piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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