Tool Jokes

Funniest Tool Short Jokes

Short tool jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The tool humour may include short gear jokes also.

1. A guy tried to tell me about a tool that makes holes in hard materials, but I stopped him. I know the drill.
2. My friend was showing me his tool shed. He pointed to a ladder.
   "That's my step ladder," he said.
   "I never met my real ladder."
3. I misplaced Dwayne Johnson's cutting tool for the origami workshop... I can't believe I lost the Rock's Paper
   Scissors...
4. Why wasn't the hammer allowed to join the party of seven other tools? Cause he was tool eight.
5. I'm looking for a woman, recently married, recently cheated on , mad or scorned... Who is willing to sell her man's tools for cheap.
6. I work in a machine tools factory,now i can talk more about my job......... but its mostly boring.
7. my friend told me that tool puns aren't funny I said I disagree because I think awl puns are funny
8. I was in a love triangle with my girlfriend and a tool. I told her she had to choose. Me or him. She chose the ladder.
9. Knowledge is knowing that papers are best written with alcohol and edited with caffeine. Wisdom is realizing that this does not make a Jagerbomb a study tool
10. Saw a guy in the power tool department at home depot who looked a lot like Elvis. Returned a sander.

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Tool One Liners

Which tool one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with tool? I can suggest the ones about instrument and torch.

1. How is Rihanna's boyfriend and power tools the same? They're both Black and Decker.
2. Asked Google how to start a campfire without any tools It gave me 20 million matches.
3. What tool do you use to open an egg? A hatchet
4. What is the king of all tools? The Ruler.
5. What is Snoop Doggs favorite tool for woodworking? A chizzle.
6. What brand of power tools does chris brown use? Black and Deck Her
7. Traditionally, orthopedic surgeons were strong and dumb. But now they have power tools.
8. Why wouldn't the frog lend his hammer to the mushroom? Because it's a toad's tool.
9. I won't go anywhere near foot hygiene tools... I hear some of them are pedi files
10. What do you call a math tool that supports farming vehicle rights? Protractor
11. My friend didn't take one of his power tools seriously. Luckily it was just a drill.
12. A pencil isn't my favorite writing tool... ...but it's a solid number 2
13. What's the pope's favorite power tool? A cathedrill
14. What is the smartest tool? A thermometer because it has so many degrees
15. What did the retired power tool take for its allergies? Benadryl.

Power Tool Jokes

Here is a list of funny power tool jokes and even better power tool puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• What is the best power tool to love? A Sawzall. Because it will reciprocate.
• What's Jesus's favorite power tool? A nail gun
• Whats the difference between a Mexican and a power tool? Power tools are found inside the Home Depot.
• What's a musician's favorite power tool? A Bandsaw
• What is an astronaut's favorite power tool? An orbital sander
• Why are power tools good for bank robberies? They know the drill.
• Obscure Phobias 41. What do you call the Fear of Power Tools? Common Sense.
• Dentist I am not sure if it is the waterboarding,
  the unsterilised power tools,
  or the insistence that I quote from the Koran,
  but I think my dentist was trained by ISIS !!
• Some power tools come to life and start making friends with people in your neighborhood. You know the drill.
• What is the worst place to go on Black Friday? Awnser: Home Depot They have power tools lol

Tool Shed Jokes

Here is a list of funny tool shed jokes and even better tool shed puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Someone told me I'm not the sharpest tool in the shed What does that mean?
• My dad says I'm not the sharpest tool in the shed. But he also says atleast I've got the being a tool part down to a science!
• My colleagues at work asked where I kept my garden tools.... "Don't you have a shed in your garden?"
  "No."
  "So where do you keep your lawnmower?"
  "She shares the bed with me."
• Why did Ottis Toole say to Henry Lee Lucas after he got caught? I ain't the sharpest Toole in the shed
• When I was younger I misheard the song lyrics as "I ATE the sharpest tool in the shed"... I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed
• My friend told me I wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed. I told him I'm not a tool or in a shed. Sure showed him.
• Where does Dracula keep his tools? The blood shed.
• I'm not the brightest shed in the tool But you definitely read that wrong
• A blonde is like a hammer Not the sharpest tool in the shed
• What is the sharpest tool in the shed? The SUHHH DUDE!

Level Tool Jokes

Here is a list of funny level tool jokes and even better level tool puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• Jin Wong works in construction He had some of his tools and levels stolen so now he puts his name on his stuff..
  Now everywhere I look its just Wong on so many levels..

Comical Puns & Laughs: Enjoy Fun, Witty Tool Jokes with Friends.

What funny jokes about tool you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean machine jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make tool pranks.