Tonsils Jokes
18 tonsils jokes and hilarious tonsils puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about tonsils that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Need a laugh? Look no further than this collection of tonsils jokes! From funny stories about getting your tonsils removed and acting as the pimple on your friend's chin, to puns that reassure you that the surgeon knows what he's doing, you're sure to find yourself laughing in no time.
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Funniest Tonsils Short Jokes
Short tonsils jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The tonsils humour may include short throat sore jokes also.
- A man went into surgery to remove his tonsils. Due to a hospital error he got circumcised.
Media was alerted by an anonymous tip. - Two speed are swiming next to each other when one of them says, "Hey buddy, how far until we get to the egg?"
The other one says, "Relax. We just passed the tonsils." - What do you call a skydiving tonsil who's afraid that something bad might happen? Paranoid!
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Tonsils One Liners
Which tonsils one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with tonsils? I can suggest the ones about teeth and wisdom teeth.
- What did one tonsil say to the other? Get dressed, the doctor is taking us out tonight!
- I got some really cool clothing for my tonsils Now I have post-nasal drip
Charming Humor Tonsils Jokes with Loads of Fun
What funny jokes about tonsils you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean saliva jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make tonsils pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
s**... after surgery
A surgeon went to check on his patient after an operation.
"You'll be fine," he said.
She asked ...
How long will it be before I am able to have a normal s**... life again doctor?"
The surgeon seemed to pause, and a small tear ran down his cheek from the corner of his eye, which alarmed the girl.
"What's the matter Doctor? I will be all right, won't I?"
He replied ...
Yes, you'll be fine. It's just that no one has ever asked me that after having their tonsils out."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A man has a sore t**... and goes to the doctor...
Doctor: "Your tonsils gotta come out."
Patient: "I want a second opinion!"
Doctor: "Okay, I don't like your haircut."
Pain.
Two young boys are waiting for their
surgery…
What operation are you having done?
Getting my tonsils out, what about you?
Circumcision
Oh that's bad, I had that done when I was born
and I couldn't walk for a year
Two 5 year old boys are in the hospital waiting to go into surgery. The first boy asks the other, "What are having done?"
"I'm having my tonsils taken out."
"Oh you're going to love it. I had that done last year and I got to eat ice cream for a week. Best week ever."
The second boy asks, "What about you?"
"Circumcision," the first boy replies.
The second boy responds, "I had that done when I was born and I couldn't walk for almost a year."
2 kids in a hospital outside the operating room.
1st kid asks "What are you in here for?"
2nd kid says "Getting my tonsils out, I'm a little nervous."
1st kid says "You've got nothing to worry about. I had that done when I was 4. They put you to sleep, when you wake up they give you Jelly & ice cream. It's a breeze."
2nd kid asks "What are you here for?"
1st kid says "Circumcision."
"Whoa!" the 2nd kid replies. "Good luck buddy. I had that done when I was born. Couldn't walk for a year!!!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What do you call an operation.
what do you call an operation to have your tonsils removed? a Tonsillectomy.
What do you call an operation to have your appendix removed? an Appendectomy.
What do you call an operation where a man has his tubes cut so he can't have children? a vasectomy.
What do you call an operation when a woman has a s**... change? an Add-a-d**...-to-me.
Kids in a hospital
Two little kids are in the hospital, lying on stretchers next to each other outside the operating room.
The first kid leans over and asks, "What are you in here for?"
The second kid says, "I'm in here to get my tonsils out, and I'm a little nervous."
The first kid says, You've got nothing to worry about. I had that done when I was four. They put you to sleep, and when you wake up they give you lots of Jell-O and ice cream. It's a breeze!"
The second kid then asks, "What are you in for?"
The first kid says, "A circumcision."
And the second kid says, "Whoa! I had that done when I was born. Couldn't walk for a year!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A doctor overhears two 8 year olds on hospital beds next to each other
The first one leans over and asks, "What are you in here for?"
The second kids says, "I'm here to get my tonsils removed, I'm a little scared."
The first kid says, "You've got nothing to worry about, I did that when I was 4. They put you to sleep, and when you wake up they give you lots of Jell-O and Ice cream, and it's a breeze."
The second kid then asks, "What are you in here for?"
The first kid says, "A circumcision."
The second kid gasps, "Woah, good luck buddy, I had that done a long time ago..."
"**I couldn't walk for a year"**
What Are You Here For?
Two kids are in hospital, in surgical gowns, sitting on their gurneys. What are you here for? asked the first child.
I'm here to get my tonsils removed, says the second child.
Don't worry, the first child says. I had my tonsils removed last year and you get all the ice cream you want!
The second child asks the first child, What are you're here for?
I'm here for a circumcision, says the first child.
Oh my God, says the second child. I had that done when I was born, I did not walk for a year!
Two 12 year olds are in the hospital...
Two 12 year old boys are in the hospital, both on gurneys waiting to be wheeled into surgery. The first boy says to the other, "What are you here for?"
The second boy says, "I'm having my tonsils removed."
"Oh, I had my tonsils removed a few years ago. It wasn't that bad, and I got lots of ice cream after."
"So what are you here for?", asks the second boy.
"I'm getting a circumcision."
"Oh geez, good luck. I had mine done when I was a baby and I couldn't walk for 12 months afterwards."
Credit goes to my Finance professor, who told this joke as his opening statement for his retirement banquet speech.
Two men are in the operating room
Two men are in the operating room getting prepared for surgery.
One says to the other, "Hey buddy, what are you in for?"
The other says, " I'm here to get my tonsils taken out"
The first man says "Oh that's not so bad. I had that done when I was younger, and I got to eat ice cream for two days strait."
The second man felt at ease with this reassurance. "Thanks for that, doesn't sound so bad. What about you, what are you in for?"
The first man says, "I'm here to get circumcised."
The second man says" Oh I had that done when I was a baby. I couldn't walk for over a year!"
Two little kids are in a hospital...
Two little kids are in a hospital, lying on stretchers next to each other, outside the operating room.
The first kid leans over and asks, "What are you in here for?"
The second kid says, "I'm in here to get my tonsils out and I'm a little nervous."
The first kid says, "You've got nothing to worry about. I had that done when I was four. They put you to sleep, and when you wake up they give you lots of Jell-O and ice cream. It's a breeze!"
The second kid then asks, "What are you here for?"
The first kid says, "A circumcision."
And the second kid says, "Whoa! I had that done when I was born. I couldn't walk for a year!"
Presurgery discussions
Two little boys are in a hospital, lying on beds next to each other, outside the Operating Room.
The first kid leans over and asks, 'What are you in here for?'
The second kid says, 'I'm in here to get my tonsils out and I'm a little nervous.'
The first kid says, 'You've got nothing to worry about. I had that done when I was four.
They put you to sleep, and when you wake up
they give you lots of Jell-O and ice cream. It's a breeze.'
The second kid then asks, 'What are you in here for?'
The first kid says, 'A circumcision.'
And the second kid says, 'Whoa, good luck with that one, buddy!
I had that done when I was BORN ... Couldn't walk for a year.