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Toilet Bowl Jokes

33 toilet bowl jokes and hilarious toilet bowl puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about toilet bowl that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Toilet Bowl Short Jokes

Short toilet bowl jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The toilet bowl humour may include short toilet jokes also.

  1. Dogs and toilet I yelled my dog to stop drinking out of the toilet.
    Later that day my dog yelled at me for peeing in the water bowl
  2. My girlfriend left stains on the toilet bowl. I thought she'd be easier to flush than that.
  3. millennial superstitions If your phone drops in the toilet bowl, you will have seven years of frustrating eyebrows.
  4. What's worse than dropping your phone in the toilet bowl you just peed in? Cancer. Cancer is much much worse.
  5. Today my girlfriend told me to stick something hard where she pees. So I threw a bowling ball in her toilet.
  6. There were only paper towels at the toilet bowl instead of toilet paper Not ideal, but I made doo

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Toilet Bowl One Liners

Which toilet bowl one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with toilet bowl? I can suggest the ones about toilet seat and toilet flush.

  1. I put some googly eyes in my toilet bowl last week. Let's just say it's seen some $h!t.
  2. I tried a new toilet bowl cleaner today. It was craptastic!
  3. My wiener keeps hitting the toilet bowl. So does my bowls.
  4. Darn I've missed the toilet bowl and it's all on the bed
  5. Toilet bowls .... should be higher
  6. Guys, tonight I'm going down on one knee ...above the toilet bowl.
  7. Why did the boy peek down the toilet bowl? He was trying to find Winnie the Pooh.
  8. How can you tell when a toilet is embarrassed?? It gets flushed and bowled over.

Delightful Fun Toilet Bowl Jokes for a Roaring Good Time

What funny jokes about toilet bowl you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean sitting toilet jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make toilet bowl pranks.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

My Cousin's Wedding Night

On my cousin's wedding night he approached our grandfather and asked, "Pap, you and gram have been married for 56 years. Can you give me any advice on my wedding night?"
My grandfather responded, "take the hardest thing you got and put it where she pees."
My cousin thought for a moment and then asked, "why would I put my bowling ball in the toilet?"

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Why have they started putting pictures of politicians inside toilet bowls?

So the a**... can see who they voted for.

After many faithful years as a Christian, John's dedication finally paid off as he found himself the girl of his dreams.

At the wedding he walks over to his best friend for advice.
"Hey man! What is it that I'm supposed to do when I get her all alone after the wedding?"
"Ah, that's simple. You just take your most prized-possession and stick it in where she pees."
"Ah! Thanks dude!"
"No problem!"
Later that night, John took his bowling ball and put it in the toilet.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Three long poos stretch down, one after the other, and silently enter the water without a splash

The toilet bowl says 'Why the long f**...?'

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Mommy, mommy can I lick the bowl out?

Noooo...just flush the toilet like a normal person......

A blonde man marries his girlfriend who is also blonde.

It's their first honeymoon night and the man doesn't quite know what to do. He calls his dad, who says, "Son, you take the hardest thing you got and you put it where she goes to the bathroom." The newlywed thanks his father, hangs up the phone, and places his bowling ball in the toilet.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

"How much money would it take for you to drink out of a non-flushed toilet bowl?"

"A s**..."

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Two teenagers, Fred and Joe, meet after school and Fred is all excited

Man I was at the most awesome party this weekend! We went to this dude's house and guy had toilets made of pure gold!
No way!
Yes way, insists Fred, come with me and check it out for yourself if you don't believe me.
Twenty minutes later they're ringing the doorbell at the place. A middle-aged lady opens and Fred eagerly asks her, Hi! I'm sorry to bother you but there was a party at your house yesterday and my friend doesn't believe that you have toilet bowls of pure gold!
The lady looks at him for a moment and then yells into the inside of the house, Roger, the pig that s**... in your t**... is here!

A man visits a a lovely old couple for dinner.

The man sits down after the table has been set. The man looks down and says, "these dishes are still dirty!" The husband says, "they are as clean as creek water gets 'em!"
The man then goes to the restroom and sees the disgusting toilet bowl, he comes back saying, "do you ever clean around here?" The husband again says, "that's as clean as creek water gets 'em."
Finally the man decides to head to bed and goes into the guest bedroom to find a dog laying on the bed. He comes out yelling, "I am not sleeping with a dog!" The husband looks over and shrugs, "that's just ol' creek water, he never hurt no one."

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Some Chuck Norris Jokes

- Chuck Norris doesn't pet any animals. Animals pet themselves when he approaches them.
- Chuck Norris threw a hand grenade and killed 50 people. Then the grenade exploded.
- When Chuck Norris enters the room, even the chairs are standing up.
- Chuck Norris doesn't need to flush the toilet. He simply goes "Boo!" and anything in the bowl promptly rushes away.
- Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at a Burger King. He got it without a single remark.
- Chuck Norris doesn't ever call the wrong number. You just answer the wrong phone.
- When Lee Harvey Oswald shot Kennedy, Chuck Norris caught the bullets with his own bare hands. JFK's head exploded simply because he was so overawed.

⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language

Instructions for cleaning the toilet

**Instructions for cleaning the toilet:**
1. Lift the lid on the toilet and fill it with 1/8 cup of animal shampoo.
2. Take the cat in your arms and s**... it gently while slowly moving in the direction of the toilet.
3. At a suitable moment, throw the cat into the toilet bowl and close the lid quickly and either stand or sit on the lid.
4. The cat will now start the cleaning process and will produce generate plenty of foam. Do not be concerned about the loud noises coming from the toilet; your cat is enjoying herself.
5. After several minutes flush the toilet to start the Power-wash pre-wash and then flush again for the main wash cycle.
6. Ask someone to open the front door and ensure that no-one is between the toilet and the front door.
7. Get off the toilet seat and from a safe distance open the toilet lid quickly. The cat will dry off naturally due to the high speed she will be moving from the toilet to the front door.
8. The toilet and the cat are now both clean.

jokes about toilet bowl