Following is our collection of funny Tiny jokes. There are some tiny smallest jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these tiny salamander puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
..and as we came out of a store, three girls aged between 18 and 20 walked by, wearing tiny cropped tops and short short skirts. One of them, a tall blonde, had really fantastic, long, toned and tanned legs.
I gently nudged my wife and said "I bet you wish you still had legs like that!".
She got really upset with me..in fact I could still hear her sobbing as I wheeled her up the ramp into the next store.
The skipper was sailing along islands when I saw on a really tiny one a man with a long beard, torn-down clothes and no shoes waving at us, screaming. He was very, very far and I didn't understand a word he was saying. I asked the skipper:
- Who is this guy?
- Dunno, he have been there for six months, waves at me every day.
After being away on buisness, Tim thought it would be nice to bring his wife a little gift.
"How about some perfume?" he asked the cosmetics clerk.
She showed him a bottle costing $50. "That's a bit much," said Tim, so she returned with a smaller bottle for $30.
"That's still quite a bit," Tim complained.
Growing annoyed, the clerk brought out a tiny $15 bottle.
"What I mean," said Tim, "is I'd like to see something really cheap."
The clerk handed him a mirror.
Chernobyl fallout.
"Why do you call it Tiny?"
"Because it's my newt."
Why because I'm so cute and tiny?
No, I will probably get drunk later and bang you the coffee table.
"this is the gaymen forest".. he thinks it's a joke and moves on. As he walks, he sees more and more posts that say "this is the gaymen forest" and that get smaller and smaller. At a certain point, he sees a tiny post, close to the ground. He bends over to read it and sees "It's too late now, buddy! Told ya !"
You take away its tiny brooms.
The bartender says "that's a weird pet what's his name?"
The guy responds, "oh, his name is Tiny."
The bartender then asks "Well that's a weird name, why do you call him that?"
And the guys answers "because he's mynewt!"
"Well that's really tiny writing!"
A tiny part of me says yes..
You can explore tiny small reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean tiny eeny dad jokes. There are also tiny puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
A woman walks into a bar with her pet newt on her shoulder. She sits down on a stool and orders a beer. The barman looks at the woman and her newt and asks her, "What's his name?"
"Tiny." The woman replies.
"Why tiny?" The barman inquires.
"Because he's my newt."
There was only a tiny bit of pork in the middle, the left and right sides were just pure breadcrumbs.
The butcher apologised and said that he was suffering financially, business was tough and he was finding it increasingly difficult to make ends meat.
How did you get their tiny legs apart?
The librarian said, "I don't think it's in yet."
I said, "Yes, that's the one."
It cost him $300, but it was a lot cheaper than a funeral...
But I could never get their tiny legs apart to find out.
Bro," what washes up on a tiny beach?"
Me," No idea."
Bro," a microwave."
Followed by about 2 seconds of me not getting it then laughing for a solid minute
"Ask me anything and it's yours!" She thought a moment and then answered, "I want my husband to pay more attention to me, to protect me, to take me out frequently, to sleep close to me, and to be more caring, even if I get a tiny scratch." "No problem." And POOF! She was a smartphone!
'Excuse me,' said the woman sitting next to him. "But, would you mind explaining why you're doing this?
"It scares away the elephants,' replied the drunk. "But I don't see any elephants around here,' said the woman
"Effective, isn't it?" crowed the drunk.
The bartender says "What a strange pet, what's his name?"
"Tiny." the man replies.
"What an odd name, why do you call him tiny?"
"Because he's my newt."
a tiny part of me says yes.
It's a small scale operation
The bartender says, "Nice lizard. What's its name?"
"I call him Tiny because he's my newt."
(•_•)
( •_•)>⌐■-■
(⌐■_■)
In *da* pendent
He asks for a coke and a mango juice for his newt Tiny.
The bartender asks Why is he called Tiny?
And the man replies Because he's my newt!
A tiny part of me says 'yes'.
a tiny part of me says yes
Thanks, but I'm not interested in microscopes right now.
Salesman: That's okay, take my business card anyway.
This text is tiny, I can't read it.
Salesman: Boy, do I have the product for you
He passes the night trying to chat up every girl he sees, but sadly to no avail, since everyone is wierded out by his newt.
Finally, he sees a beautiful girl and strikes up a conversation with her. After a few moments of talking, she questions him about the newt.
"What's his name?" The girl ask him.
"Tiny" the man responds.
"Oh whys he named that?" The girl questions.
"Because he's my newt"
So basically you had to huff n puff on the raven claw then slither in the griffon door.
For 20 bucks they have this tiny fish that eat off your dead cells. It was way cheaper than funeral
Smiling, I replied, Tiny!"
My kid laughed and asked, What an odd name, why do you call him Tiny?
I explained, Because...he's my newt!"
It takes two, very tiny people, to screw, in a lightbulb.
Chopped into tiny pieces and burned to ashes without the police ever finding out.
Because he's my newt
It's a small scale operation.
It's a little flat.
A little girl asks her mum "mummy, how was I born" Her mother smiled and replied "once upon a time your daddy and I decided to plant a wonderful tiny seed. Your daddy planted it in the earth and I took care of it every single day. After a while the seed germinated and grew tall with many leaves until it became a lovely healthy plant. Then we dried it and smoked it and got so high we forgot to use a condom"
Because they have tiny anty-bodies
...he's really a big lyre.
I said, Actually the process is the same. They just have tiny clothes.
As they are undressing for bed, the husband hands the wife his pants.
"Here, try these on," he says.
"What? Why?" she says.
"Just put them on," he insists.
"They're way too big," she says. "I can't wear those."
"That's right," he says. "I wear the pants in this marriage. Don't you forget it."
"Got it," she says, slipping off her panties and handing them to him. "Here, try these on."
He holds them up and sees how tiny they are.
"Are you kidding?" he says. "I can't get into your panties!"
"That's right. And that's the way it's going to stay until your attitude changes."
I said, "The process is the same. They just have tiny clothes"
The teacher says to Susie, "Tell the class why you want to be a teacher."
Susie says, "Actually, I want to be a stripper."
The teacher asks, "A stripper? I thought you wanted to do my noble profession."
Susie says, "That was before I saw your tiny apartment."
My shrunk shrink stopped my shirt's skunk stink.
The bartender agrees so he pulls out a tiny piano, a frog and a hamster. The hamster starts playing the piano and the frog starts singing Adele. As the bartender gets him his drink a punter asks him "how much for the singing frog?" The man replies "I'll sell him for £100 if you want?" And the punter agrees. The bartender sees this and says to the man " WHAT?! You could have made millions off that Why'd you sell him so cheap?" And the man says "no, it's okay... The hamsters a ventriloquist"
They both thought they were amazing until a tiny bit of frozen water broken them in half
Because he was mynewt.
Wife: I can't believe it, first I am diagnosed with dyslexia.
Now I have tiny tits.
Husband: Tinnitus babe Tinnitus..
It's my Tic Tactical vest.
I was packing for my business trip and my three year old daughter was having a wonderful time playing on the bed. At one point she said, "Daddy, look at this", and stuck out two of her fingers.
Trying to keep her entertained, I reached out and stuck her tiny fingers in my mouth and said, "Daddy's gonna eat your fingers," pretending to eat them.
I went back to packing, looked up again and my daughter was standing on the bed staring at her fingers with a devastated look on her face. I said, "What's wrong, honey?"
She replied, "What happened to my booger?"
I told him it was because he was my newt.
Hamlet.
A couple of years ago, I was staying at a tiny Spanish Inn when I started to feel ill. Needing a doctor, I rang reception who said they'd get the hotel doctor to visit. I was rather surprised that such a small place would have a house doctor, and was just telling the manager this when my room door burst open and in leapt a man yelling "Nobody expects the Spanish Inn physician!"
… and order a pint each.
A fly lands in the English mans beer and he pushes it away in disgust.
Another fly lands in the Irish mans beer but he drinks the beer with the fly in it.
A third fly lands the the Scots beer. He lifts up the fly in its tiny wings, shakes it, and yells: spit it out! Spit it out your little bastad .
A tiny part of me says yes.
he was my newt.
…because he's my newt.
...and got mad at me when I handed him a tiny chair. Now I'm banned from the doctors office and still don't know why I'm pooping out furniture.
Wife: I can't believe it, first I am diagnosed with dyslexia.
Then I find out I have tiny tits.
Husband: Tinnitus babe Tinnitus..
It's a small medium at large.
"An axolitl!!"
It was degrating.
The bastards gave me 86 tiny ones
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the tiny microscopic jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working tiny micro piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.