Tiger Jokes
140 tiger jokes and hilarious tiger puns to laugh out loud. Read animal jokes about tiger that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Who doesn't love a good tiger joke? Check out these hilarious animal-friendly jokes and punchlines featuring Tony the Tiger, white tigers, Bengal tigers and more! Get ready to roar with laughter in honor of these amazing animals that call the jungle their home. Laugh along with the pumas, cougars, and other cats that our tiger friends share the wild with. Get ready for some serious jungle-fun!
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Funniest Tiger Short Jokes
Short tiger jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The tiger humour may include short panther jokes also.
- Just got scammed out of $15. Bought Tiger Woods DVD entitled "My Favorite 18 Holes." Turns out it's about golf. Absolute waste of money.
- What's the difference between R Kelly and a Tiger? No one wants to see a tiger in a cage for the rest of its life.
- There has been much said and sung about the "Eye Of The Tiger", but how come no one ever talks about the other four letters? The Tea of the Tiger was quite a refreshing and pleasant event!
- The worst part about Tiger Wood's driving is that it's probably going to add to his handicap.
- I met Mike Tyson and he had his tiger with him. I said, "Wow! I can't believe you actually have a tiger! I thought that was a myth." He said, "Well you were mythtaken."
- Pretend you're in a jungle, what do you do if a tiger is chasing you and catching up to you? Stop pretending.
- If a tiger was attacking your wife and mother in law at the same time and you could save one, who would it be? The tiger of course. There are only a few left 🐯
- People know I go to Las vegas a lot and they always ask if I saw the white tigers at the Mirage. I say, Only if they were sitting at the Let It Ride table.
- A hunter was asked what he did for a living, and he responds that he "hunts tigers in Africa." When it's pointed out that there are no tigers in Africa, he replies "that's because I do my job".
- What is the difference between Princess Diana and Tiger Woods? One of them has a good driver.
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Tiger One Liners
Which tiger one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with tiger? I can suggest the ones about leopard and jaguar.
- A lion would never drive while drunk. But a tiger wood.
- A lion would never cheat on his wife, but a Tiger Wood
- What ruined Tiger Woods' golf career? His driving game.
- What did the Roman say when his wife was eaten by a tiger? Gladiator
- My grandfather has a heart of a tiger. He also has a lifetime ban at the zoo.
- Why do tigers have stripes? They don't want to be spotted.
- Why does a tiger make such a good girlfriend? Because its not a cheetah.
- What do you do if you come across a tiger in the jungle? Wipe it off and apologise.
- Why does Tiger have to take so many baths? Because he plays with Pooh all day.
- Why did tiger woods bring three socks instead of two? In case he got a hole in one.
- Why do tigers always beat cheetahs at hide-and-seek? They've never been spotted.
- My ex told me her spiritual animal was the tiger... but it turned out it was the cheetah.
- What is Tiger Woods' spirit animal? Idk, but his wife said he was a Cheetah
- Did you hear the news about the guy who killed Tony the Tiger? He's a cereal killer
- What did the Roman say when a tiger ate his wife? Gladiator
Tiger Woods Jokes
Here is a list of funny tiger woods jokes and even better tiger woods puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Q: What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? A: Santa stops after three hos.
- I'm not a professional caddy or anything.... but I think Tiger Woods probably should've used a driver.
- What is the best thing about Tiger Woods' arrest? A black man in America finally survived a traffic stop. Progress!
- What's the difference between a golf ball and a Cadillac? Tiger Woods can drive a golf ball 100 yards without hitting a tree.
- Tiger Woods was arrested for DUI... he was three shots over.
- Bought the book: Tiger Woods best 18 holes. I was incredibly disappointed when I found out it was about golf.
- What did the zoologist and herbologist name their child? Tiger Woods
- What's the difference between Tiger Woods and an amateur golfer? Only one of them gets convicted for reckless driving
- I heard that Tiger Woods takes an extra pair of trousers with him when he plays golf. It's just in case he gets a hole in one.
- Tiger Woods... ...just had the worst 9 holes in his life, well second worst if you consider the 9 holes that lost him his marriage but still...
Tony The Tiger Jokes
Here is a list of funny tony the tiger jokes and even better tony the tiger puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I read that Snap, Crackle and Pop were found murdered along with Captain Crunch and Tony the Tiger Authorities suspect it's the work of a cereal killer.
- Trump allegedly had an affair with Tony the Tiger. When reached for a comment, his response want typical: "Nope, not true. Flake news."
- Did you hear the Coco Pops monkey was recently murdered? Tony the Tiger, Snap, Crackle and Pop all got killed too.
Police think its the work of a serial killer. - The man behind the voice of Tony the Tiger has sadly passed away His last words were I don't feel so grrrrreat!
- They tried to make Tony the Tiger the new mascot for club soda... He became catatonic.
- Why isn't Tony the Tiger invited to anything? He's pretty flaky
- This girl I took home from the bar wanted to role-play. I told her I would be Tony the Tiger. But apparently a "Frosted Face" isn't good. Or great.
- Why did Tony the Tiger get such a harsh sentence for murdering Toucan Sam? He was a cereal killer.
- Tony the tiger has a sleeping problem. His teeth grate!
Tiger King Jokes
Here is a list of funny tiger king jokes and even better tiger king puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- There's an upcoming show featuring the woman from Tiger King and Batman's sidekick, going around and reviewing ice cream parlors Carole Baskin And Robin's
Tiger Woods Dui Jokes
Here is a list of funny tiger woods dui jokes and even better tiger woods dui puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- I'm not surprised Tiger Woods to get arrested for a DUI... ...he hasn't been driving straight since 2009.
- Why has it taken so long for the cops to catch Tiger Woods for DUI? He hasn't been able to drive straight for at least five years
- Why did Tiger Woods get a DUI? Because his driver was off.
White Tiger Jokes
Here is a list of funny white tiger jokes and even better white tiger puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- How do you turn a fruit into a vegetable? Give them a show in Vegas and introduce a white tiger.
Unearthly Funniest Tiger Jokes to Tickle Your Sides
What funny jokes about tiger you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean elephant jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make tiger pranks.
Tiger Woods playing golf.
Sorry if this is a repost, but I found this one quite funny.
Tiger Woods is practicing golf one day, surrounded by fans and media. While he's practicing, an amateur
golfer confidently walks up to him and challenges him to a match. Tiger knew he'd win, so he agrees thinking that it would be a fun break from serious practice. "OK," the amateur says, "Since I'm an amateur and you're a pro, you'll have to allow me two gotchas". Tiger didn't know what a gotchas is, but he didn't ask because he thought he'd win regardless of what handicap is placed on him. The fans and media leave the two alone so they can play in peace.
A few hours later, the two come out of the golf course and it turns out that Tiger Woods lost. The fans and media surrounded him wanting to know what happened. Tiger says, "I was starting the first hole, concentrating to tee off, you know, deep in thought. Right when I was about to drive the ball, he ran up from behind, grabbed my nuts and squeezed them tight while loudly screaming 'GOTCHA!!' can you imagine me trying to play eighteen holes waiting for the next gotcha?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Jesus and Moses are playing golf.
After teeing off, Jesus asks Moses which club he should use to clear the water hazard and Moses says, "Use your 4 iron". Jesus says, "No, Tiger Woods would use a 6 iron". His shots goes into the water. Jesus walks out onto the water to find his ball and is seen by another golfer who says to Moses, "Look at that guy. Who does he think he is, Jesus Christ?" Moses says, "He is Jesus Christ, he THINKS he's Tiger Woods."
A visit to the zoo.
A father and son were observing a tiger in its cage at the zoo.
The father was explaining how ferocious and strong tigers are, and his son was taking it all in with a serious expression.
"Dad," the son said finally, "if the tiger got out of his cage and ate you up .....…"
"Yes, son?" the father said expectantly.
"What bus should I take to get back home?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What advice did Tiger Woods' dad have for Tiger during training?
Concentrate on golf—f**... everything else.
A husband comes home to find his beautiful blonde wife sitting at the kitchen table in tears.
"What's wrong, dear?" He asks
Through her tears she says, "well, I've been trying to put this puzzle together all day and I just can't seem to figure it out! It's supposed to be a tiger."
He looks at her and in his most sympathetic voice says, "sweetheart, put the frosted flakes back in the box."
Ba dum-tiss
Tiger Woods and Lindsey Vonn had a huge argument over whether to circumcise their son
Lindsey went downhill from there, but Tiger made the cut.
A man looking for work
A man was looking for work. In fact, he was desperate. He heard the circus was in town and so he went and asked the ring master if there was a job for him. The ring master said, "We're lucky you showed up! Our tiger just died and he was a big part of the show. What we need you to do is put on this tiger costume and pretend to be a real tiger. Nobody will know the difference." So the man put on the tiger costume, and he had to admit, it was a very realistic costume. Soon the show started, and the time came for the tiger act. The man, eager to do a good job, lept out into the ring, snarling just like a real tiger. The crowd cheered. He did all the things the tiger was supposed to do: let the trainer stick his head in his mouth, balanced on a ball, and finally walked across a tightrope. The crowd loved it. But then a lion and a bear entered the ring. The ring master announced, "Now you will see these three ferocious beasts enter one cage together!" The man had no choice as he was herded into the cage with the lion and the bear. The two animals roared and snarled, and the man became afraid for his life. He began running around the cage, shouting, "Let me out! I'm not a real tiger! Help!" Then the lion grabbed him and said, "Shut up! Do you want us all to lose our jobs?"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why did Tony the Tiger go to prison?
RRRrrrrrrrrrrrape!
A tiger goes to the gym...
... wearing women's underwear underneath his workout clothes.
When he does squats does that make him a crouching tiger with hidden drag on?
A blonde calls her boyfriend...
One day a man gets a call from his blond girlfriend.
"Hey Babe!"
"Listen, I need you to come over right now! I'm doing a puzzle and I think it's supposed to be a tiger but I just can't figure it out, I've been doing it for hours..."
The boyfriend was a little confused, as she didn't seem the type to buy a puzzle... But it was clear she was upset, so he made the trip over. He walked in to her apartment and saw her sitting on the floor, a blue box overturned and all the pieces arranged in random circles on the floor.
He looked at her for a while without saying anything, then just sighed and said, "Sweetie, lets get all these frosted flakes back in the box..."
Why Did The Tiger Cross The Road?
Because there wasn't a Zebra crossing
Sorry, my 5 year old son made me post this
So i went to Walmart today...
... and asked customer service for gta5. She was confused so I told her that it was a game with a black guy who crashed his car, sleeps with prostitutes, and attacks people with his golf club. She came later with Tiger Woods PGA 2010.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A successful woman needs four animals in her life...
A jaguar in her garage, a mink in her closet, a tiger in her bed, and a j**... to pay for all of the above.
Tiger, Lance and Tom walk into a cold bar...
"Heaters," the bartender cries in frustration, "I told him to send me heaters!"
A saber-tooth tiger arrives at a cave party
Where it's friends had been partying with a bunch of cave-people.
"I see I'm too late," says the tiger.
"Yup," says another. "Everyone's eaten"
What do you call a man-eating tiger?
A tiger.
My mommy told me I would grow up to be a big tiger someday...
She was lion.
I don't think a lion would play golf
But a Tiger Wood
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
John and Peter
John: Dude my girlfriend is pregnant, but I use a c**... every time.
Peter: Come here my dear friend and I will explain it to you
John: Ok.
Peter: A man went into the jungle with an umbrella. He saw a tiger coming right at him. He touched the button of his umbrella and the tiger died.
John: Haha!But that's impossible. Maybe someone else shot the tiger.
Peter: Exactly..
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I was s**... assaulted by tony the tiger today.
I'm pushing charges for rrrrrrape.
A tiger walks into a bar
A tiger walks into a bar.
Bartender: What'll you have?
Tiger: I'll have a Jack and........................................................................................................ Coke.
Bartender: What's with the big pause?
Tiger: I was born with 'em!
Why did Tiger Woods cheat on his wife?
He's used to playing 18 holes.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why does Tiger Woods carry 2 blow-up s**... dolls with him at all times?
Incase he gets a hole in one.
A young bear cub was roaming the jungle . An animal he had never seen before comes strolling out of the trees.
He asks " excuse me what kind of animal are you?"
The animal replys
" well, I am a tiger"
The bear acts suprised and says " are you sure? You don't look like a tiger."
The tiger says " Do you think I'm a lyin?"
A German tank commander boasted "One Tiger can take on ten Shermans!"
And an American replied "Good thing we have eleven."
What do you get when you cross a tiger with a human?
Kicked out of the zoo and fined 1,000 dollars
What's the similarity between a lion and a tiger?
They are both lions, except for the tiger.
When interviewing the police officers involved in Tiger Woods' arrest, they told how they came to suspect he was under the influence.
"Simple" The officer responded. "It was the straightest drive he's had in years. We knew right away something was up."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My son wanted me to buy him GTA
When I got to the store, I couldn't remember the title. So I told the guy "it's the game where the black guy drives cars round drunk, and shags loads of women"
He gave me a copy of tiger woods PGA golf
Did you hear tiger woods got arrested?
Should have used his driver.
BREAKING: Tiger kills worker in an enclosure at UK zoo park
Man he took that DUI hard
Would anyone like some prescription drugs?
Tiger Wood
TIL a tiger would chase down your vehicle leaving his family behind, but a lion would never do that.
Because it would hurt his pride
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Two guys were walking though the Sahara
They suddenly see a tiger approaching .
o**... throws sand in the tiger's eyes and he runs away.
The other guy keeps standing still.
"RUN MAN, WHY ARE YOU STANDING STILL??"
"Well I didn't throw the sand at him"
A tiger can jump higher than a three story building.
Tigers have fast twitch muscles in their backs and legs, and buildings cannot jump.
How do tigers walk around without being spotted?
By being striped.
A blonde girl decides to do a puzzle.....
...so she grabs the puzzle and pours out all the pieces and tries to put it together. After a while she gets frustrated and calls her boyfriend. He asks her what is wrong and she tells him about the trouble she is having with the puzzle. He tells her to look at the picture on the front and tell him what it looks like. The blonde says, Okay, well, the background is blue and there is a tiger on it.
After a long pause her boyfriend sighs and says, Honey, put the cornflakes back in the box.
Stevie Wonder has a bet with Tiger Woods on a game of golf, Stevie says I will beat you, so they agree to have a $500,000 bet on it, Stevie says you name the venue and I will name the time, Tiger says OK St Augustus, so what time we playing? Stevie replied.
Midnight.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The Priest and the Tiger
A priest visits the zoo, but accidentally trips over, landing in the tiger enclosure. The tiger slowly approaches the priest, so the priest begins to pray.
To his surprise the tiger prays too.
'Its a miracle!' The priest exclaims. 'I thought you were going to eat me.'
'Shut up you idiot, I'm just saying grace!' Replies the tiger.
I just came across a tiger in a jungle.
I immediately wiped it off and apologised.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Tiger Woods went to the v**... Islands
It is now called just the Islands.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A lion and a tiger make a liger, a whale and dolphin a wolphin, a squid and octopus a scquoctopus. What would a five-year old and a horse be?
Definitely i**....
Sonny Bono can't tell you the name of the tiger in The Jungle Book...
But Cher can.
I got scammed! Purchased Tiger Woods book 18 of my favorite holes ...
and it was about golf.
God asked Adam to name the animals
Adam began to invent names, Lion, Tiger, Horse, Cow, Pig…
Then God said, You must name the sea animals, too
Adam was tired already, so he said, Sea lion, Tiger shark, Sea horse, Sea cow, Sea pig…
Two tigers are walking down the street.
One says to the other:
'It's quiet for a Saturday isn't it?'
What is the difference between a freshly made pizza and a hungry jungle tiger?
One tastes delicious to you and you taste delicious to one.
Scientists transformed a tiger into a horse.
Don't worry, it's in a stable condition.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
WARNING: Tiger King Spoilers
Will make your car look s**....
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My grandpa was telling me about when he used to hunt tigers.
He said, "this one time I was alone in the jungle when out of the bushes, right in front of me, a huge tiger leaped out suddenly and went RRROOOOAAAAAARRRRR!!!!!!! Kid, you won't believe it, I s**... myself."
I raised my eyebrows. "You bet I believe it, I'd have s**... myself too if that happened to me."
"That's not what I mean g**..., go fetch me some toilet paper."
All the big cats gathered for a game of poker. Why did the tiger lose?
Because one of his opponents kept on lion. Another had a puma-nent poker face. But the real problem was the cheetah.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Did you know that a Siberian Tiger can absolutely devour a 7-year-old girl in just about 45 seconds?
Anyways, I lost my job at the petting zoo, today...
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Your Girlfriend Is Pregnant !
Guy: But doctor that can't be right. We use condoms everytime we have s**....
Doctor: Well, the test result would suggest otherwise. Maybe the c**... broke?
Guy: No I'm sure it didn't.
Doctor: Alright then. Let me tell you a story. A guy was wandering in the forest where he encountered a tiger. The tiger looked really ferocious and the guy knew that he was doomed. Cornered, the guy then points his umbrella's tip at the tiger and shouts Bang at the tiger. The tiger died.
Guy: That can't be right. Someone else must have shot the tiger.
Doctor: Exactly.
Why did the tiger eat the tightrope walker?
It wanted a balanced diet.
Why did tiger quit golf?
He lost the ability to drive
