The Best 35 Think Jokes

Following is our collection of funniest Think jokes. There are some think jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud. Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these think puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Funny Think Jokes and Puns

If any of you here are thinking of getting married, consider the following before you do.

On the one hand, you get to wear a pretty cool ring.

On the other hand, you don't.

I'm seriously thinking about re-marrying my ex-wife…

But I'm pretty sure she'll figure out I'm just after my money.

I was thinking the other day ...

So I shouted, "Thomeone help! I can't thwim!"

I am thinking about pursuing a job as a crowd estimator

I wonder how many people are in that field

I was thinking about spending $100 to watch the boxing match tonight...

But why would I spend money to see Mayweather when I can just look outside?


I'm thinking of opening a pre-owned clock store...

I'm gonna call it 'Second Hand'.

I'm thinking of opening a sperm bank and calling it...

"Get a load of this guy"

Thinking about opening up a sperm bank in New Jersey.

Gonna call it: "Get a load of this guy over here!".

I'm thinking about starting a dating app for low IQ people.

I'm calling it OK Stupid.

I'm thinking of donating my body to science

It's taking up too much space in the freezer.

I was thinking about buying a blindfold, but decided not to

I just couldn't see myself wearing it

You can explore think reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean think dad jokes. There are also think puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Who else thinks it's time we called Sesame Street out for what it really is?

Show of hands

"I'm thinking of running a marathon again." I told my friend.

"You've run a marathon before?" she asked, with an air of admiration.

I said, "No, but I've thought about it."

im thinking about removing my spine...

i feel like its only holding me back

If you're thinking about joining Hypochondriacs Anonymous remember...

The first step is admitting you don't have a problem.

I'm thinking of starting a youth foundation...

I mean I've already got like 30 kids buried in my basement.

I'm thinking of moving to Switzerland

No particular reason, but the flag's a big plus

I'm thinking of going on a cleanse

just not sure which race to start with

I'm thinking about starting a business that recycles discarded chewing gum...

I just need help getting it off the ground.


Everyone thinks..

Everyone thinks Jesus is soooo good, feeding an army with 3 loaves of bread and a fish.
Hitler's not such a bad guy, he made 6 million jews toast.

Anyone who thinks Jesus wasn't a white man has never been to communion

The body of Christ is a cracker.

I don't like thinking about gravity.

It brings me down.

I am thinking about getting a job cleaning mirrors

I could see myself doing that

I was thinking of becoming a banker ...

But I lost interest

I'm thinking of giving away my broken marionette.

No strings attached

I was thinking about going into business and opening my own distillery...

But my accountant thinks that's a whiskey investment.

If any of you are thinking of getting married, please consider this carefully

On the one hand, you get to wear a pretty cool ring.

On the other hand, you don't.

You know I was thinking about not getting fat,

But I really had a lot on my plate at the time..

"Right, I've been thinking." I said to the oncologist. "I'm not keen on radiotherapy or chemotherapy. At this stage I think it would be best to just let the disease take its natural course."

My wife's eyes filled with tears, "We should've discussed this together."

"My minds made up." I insisted.

"I think your wife is right." Said the consultant. "After all, she is the one with cancer."

I don't know why everyone thinks the wall won't work.

China built one over 2000 years ago and they STILL don't have any Mexicans.

I'm thinking of joining a gym.

I'm keeping mentally active.

I was thinking of buying the black iPad mini..

Apparently, it runs faster.

My SO thinks it's sexy to bite her lip...

I haven't got the heart to tell her it should be the bottom one....

I'm thinking about an app to let people rate strippers

I want to name it "Strip Advisor"

I was thinking about going as a band-aid for Halloween...

But I decided against it. It would be too hard to pull off.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the think jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working think piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes