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Theory Jokes

136 theory jokes and hilarious theory puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about theory that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Enjoy some laugh-out-loud theory jokes that involve topics such as the Theory of Relativity, the Big Bang Theory, String Theory, Theory of Knowledge, Theory of Computation and Music Theory. Read on to discover the funniest jokes involving the world of Theory, from the wit of Darwin to the reality of the Theory Test!

Funniest Theory Short Jokes

Short theory jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The theory humour may include short idea jokes also.

  1. Why do we call the alien creating the pyramids a conspiracy theory? It's obviously a pyramid scheme.
  2. My wife thinks my obsession with conspiracy theories is getting out of control. I wonder how much money the government paid her to say that?
  3. Do you know why you should never hire a communist employee? Because they only work in theory
  4. If the big bang theory, how I met your mother and two and a half men had ever crossed over it would've been called How I banged your mother with two and a half men
  5. I want to open a gym for people with fetishes. It's a great idea in theory, but I'm still trying to work out the kinks.
  6. I have no problem with Capital Punishment in theory.... I just have problems with its execution.
  7. Flat Earth theory debunked We can say with certainty that the Earth is not flat because if it was cats would have tossed everything off the edge already.
  8. Einstein: I finally finished my theory about space. Mrs. Einstein: It's about time.
    Einstein: Wow! How did you know that?
  9. I heard they're inventing a new kind of bed... ...but most of the theories I've heard are bunk.
  10. I told my boyfriend that people with lower IQs are more likely to believe in conspiracy theories... He said Thats what they want you to think!

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Theory One Liners

Which theory one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with theory? I can suggest the ones about science and concept.

  1. Conspiracy theories are a lot like moon landings. They're all fake
  2. Albert Einstein just finished his theory about space. Its about time too
  3. Einstein developed a theory about space... ...it was about time too.
  4. I have a theory on scoliosis It's just a hunch though
  5. Hanging a Beggar is good in theory, but... Is actually just Poor Execution
  6. Einstein invented a theory about space... and it was about time too!
  7. I'm scared of 5G It will only allow idiots to spread their conspiracy theories faster.
  8. The String Theory might be the answer to everything... ..but then again, it might knot.
  9. I haven't always believed in climate change But I'm warming up to the theory.
  10. The guillotine was decent in theory But amazing in execution.
  11. Was Einstein's theory good? Relatively
  12. What Do You Call A Hypothetical Group Of Ravens? A conspiracy theory!
  13. Ten minutes into "conspiracy theories and chill..." ...we start gettin *illuminaughty.*
  14. Why did Reddit mods take down Darwin's theory of evolution post? The link was missing
  15. Yo' mama so fat Einstein did a separate theory for her.

Theory Test Jokes

Here is a list of funny theory test jokes and even better theory test puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I think my communist theory test was rigged Everyone got the same marx
  • I finally made a theory as to why engineers don't get women. But I need to test it first.
  • A conspiracy theorist who doesn't believe in Zeus walks out into a field during a thunderstorm wearing his tinfoil hat to test his theory. Needless to say, he was shocked when he learned the truth.
  • Testing out a popular theory.. for karma purposes.
  • Just failed my theory test. Apparently female drivers aren't a hazard.

Einstein Theory Jokes

Here is a list of funny einstein theory jokes and even better einstein theory puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I'm pretty sure that I am related to Albert Einstein. However despite all of my research into my family tree, I just can't prove my theory of relativity.
  • If I recall correctly, in the mid 1900s, Albert Einstein proposed a new theory on space, and it was about time, too.
  • Well, Einstein has created a theory about space and it's about time too !
  • Einstein created a theory about space and it was about time too
  • Albert Einstein developed a theory about space. And, boy, it was about time, too!
  • Can't believe that it's been over a hundred years since Einstein proposed his theory of relativity. Feels like it was only yesterday...
  • I can't believe it has been more than a hundred years since Einstein published his Theory of Relativity. It seems like only yesterday.
  • I think my girlfriend's love for Einstein's theories is driving us away from each other. But, hey. I'll be a good guy and understand if she just wants some time and space.
  • My SO told me she had never heard of Einstein's Theory of Relativity before today. I said, "It's about time!"
  • How is dating in the south much like one of Einsteins most famous theories? They're all relative.
Theory joke, How is dating in the south much like one of Einsteins most famous theories?

Theory Of Relativity Jokes

Here is a list of funny theory of relativity jokes and even better theory of relativity puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Why are people from Arkansas so good at Science? Because they use the Theory of Relativity to find a partner.
  • I was doing some scientific research on the House of Hapsburgs and I have now discovered The Theory of General Relativity.
  • Two guys are talking about their family histories... GUY 1: Hey, I heard you're Einstein's distant cousin.
    GUY 2: I'm not sure, really. It's just a theory of relativity.
  • An Alabama professor was teaching about the theory of relativity when suddenly he fell asleep He was sleeping with the relatives.
  • Chuck Norris is the reason why Einstein's theory of relativity is still a theory.
  • According to Einstein's theory of relativity, Chuck Norris can actually roundhouse kick you yesterday.
  • I wonder if Einstein thought of his theory of general relativity... in New York's Time Squared...
  • What's the difference between normal schools and schools in Alabama? Schools in Alabama teach the relative theory in s**... education
Theory joke, What's the difference between normal schools and schools in Alabama?

Quirky and Hilarious Theory Jokes to Let the Chuckles Begin.

What funny jokes about theory you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean theorem jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make theory pranks.

Theory vs Reality

Little Billy had a homework assignment to compare theory and reality. The boy asked his father what the difference was between theory and reality. His father told him, 'Go ask your mother if she would have s**... with the mailman for a million dollars.' The boy asks his mother and she says she would. Billy tells his father she would have s**... with the mailman for million dollars.
The father then tells the boy, 'Now go as your sister if she would have s**... with the mailman for a million dollars.' The boy asks his sister and she to says she would have s**... with the mailman.
Little Billy goes and tells his father both his mom and his sister would have s**... with the mailman and his father says, "Well son, in theory we're multimillionaires, but in reality we live with a couple of w**....

In Theory...

In theory, theory and practice are the same.
In practice, they never are.

An observation by Adam Hills

"I have a slight theory as to why there's such a high percentage of obesity in America as compared to the rest of the world. I think it's because in 1984, a group of English and Irish musicians got together and put out a song that told us to 'feed the world'.
And then a year later, a group of American singers told us, 'We Are the World'"

I knew a girl so ugly, she fell asleep at a frat party...

and she woke up with more clothes on.
(Stolen from Big Bang theory, I just love this joke)

So an elderly woman thinks her husband is starting to go deaf...

The woman decides to test her theory. She stands about 30 feet way and calls to her husband:
"Oh Harry!"
She gets no response. She then stands 20 feet away and calls out to him again:
"Oh Harry!"
She is surprised that he STILL doesn't hear her call so she tries again, this time from 10 feet away:
"Oh Harry!"
Harry exclaims: "For the 3rd time Bertha! What do you want!?"

I have a theory that consuming little bits of peanut butter encased in colored candy shells provokes silly rhymes.

I call it my Reeces Pieces Thesis.
.
.
.
.
I'll see myself out.

Movies are too violent

A lot of Critics have been saying that movies now days are way too violent.
To test this theory I took a nine year old boy to go see Gladiator, and he cried the whole movie.
Now it may be because he didn't know who I was.

Relativity theory

In classical (Newtonian) physics, we can't solve the three-body problem. In the theory of relativity, we can't solve the two-body problem. In quantum mechanics, we can't solve the one-body problem, and with quantum electro dynamics, we don't even understand the vacuum anymore.

Isaac Newton's theory.

Isaac Newton was outside trying to explains the forces of the world and then it hit him.

Woman in a coma

Two nurses are giving a woman in a coma a sponge bath. They notice that when they get near her private areas that she starts to get a little stimulated. The theorize that o**... s**... will bring her out the coma. They go out into the lobby and tell her husband their theory. The husband is a little aprehensive about it at first, but he agrees to do it. The nurses leave the man with his wife and give him some privacy. They come back about 10 minutes later and the woman is dead! "What happened?" asks one of the nurses. The man replies, "I dont know...I think she choked."

Dr: "Mr Smith, your wife is comfortable."

Husband: "I thought she was in a coma and critical condition."
Dr: "She is, the nurses are using her as a beanbag."

Is it solipsistic in here or is it just me?

*noun
the view or theory that the self is all that can be known to exist.*

[Game of Thrones Spoiler ALL BOOKS Fan Theory] Benjen, Bran, Daario, Euron, Syrio, Jaqen, and Coldhands walk into a restaurant..

and say: "Table for one, please."

What's Hillary Clinton's favorite sitcom?

Big Bank Theory

A boy asks his dad the difference between theory and reality..

Dad: "Go ask your sister and your mom if they'd sleep with the neighbor for a million bucks".
The boy returns awhile later...
Dad: "Well, what'd they say?"
Son: "They said that they would, but I still don't understand the difference between theory and reality".
Dad: "Son, in theory we could be millionaires but in reality we live with a couple of w**...".

What is a s**... bomber's favorite TV show?

The Big Bang Theory.

I told my friend that I disproved the theory of conservation of mass,

But he didn't understand the weight of the situation.

While working at the Patent Office, I discovered the Theory of Irrelativity.

But then I decided it didn't matter.

Why are people into Flat Earth Theory?

Because it's edgy.

Scientists have a new working theory on what happened before the Big Bang.

Your mom put an ad on Craigslist.

A professor was teaching a class of hyperintelligent youngsters on Game Theory

"To get an A in the test tomorrow your score will have to be as close as possible to 2/3s of the average score of the class."
Afterwards everyone signed up for the test.
The test was the next day.
No one showed up.

Reality!

11:30- I will go to bed soon.
03:30- Why am i on wikipedia reading about advanced nuclear theory.

Some people say that The Big Bang Theory disproves God...

I mean, sure, it's not the best show, but I wouldn't go *that* far.

What's the opposite of critical thinking?

Critical theory.

I don't trust anyone with a conspiracy theory, man.

I think they are all up to something.

Miss Columbia, Hillary Clinton, and La La Land won Miss Universe, the U.S. Presidency, and Best Picture.

In theory.

My mother always told me: "If you want a job done well, do it yourself"

That theory didn't pan out too well with my last surgery.

Why will the flat earth theory never be popular?

Because they can't spread the word around

After 5 long years of studying, a student comes rushing into Einstein's office shouting...

"Sir, Sir, I finally understand your theory of Special Relativity!"
Einstein rolls his eyes, "It's about time"

Female hormones in a beer

Yesterday, scientists in the United States revealed that beer contains small traces of female hormones.
To prove their theory, they fed one hundred men twelve pints of beer and observed that 100% of them started talking nonsense and couldn't drive.

A base-12 number system is good in theory

but it dozen stand a chance in practice.

How does a physicist tune a piano?

With string theory.

I have a new theory on inertia

But it is not gaining any momentum.

Rick and morty recently surpassed Big Bang Theory as the highest rated comedy on television...

In other news, apparently Big Bang Theory is supposed to be funny.

A recent study found that cats are highly entertained by theoretical physics!

*Especially* string theory.

Little Johny asks his dad the difference between theory and reality.

Dad says: Go ask your mother if she would sleep with anyone for a million dollars. Johny runs off and asks his mom and comes back. She said yes! Dad says: Now go ask your sister. Johny comes back and says She said yes!
Dad tells Johny: In theory we have 2 million dollars. In reality we live with two w**....

What do you get when you combine How I Met Your Mother, 2 and a Half Men, and The Big Bang Theory

How 2 and a Half Men Banged Your Mother.

I used to believe in the flat earth theory

Then it dawned on me.

Why did the political theory class think their teacher was being unfair?

He gave the whole class the same Marx

An awkward friend of mine just finished his PhD in palindrome theory..

Now he's Dr. Awkward.

A new conspiracy theory states Priness Diana was actually on the radio shortly after the supposed accident that killed her.

And the windshield, and the dashboard...
^^^I ^^^feel ^^^dirty

A lot of people believe Walt Disney is cryogenically frozen in the basement of CalArts.

# I personally love this conspiracy theory because it's a wonderful example of suspended animation.
Credit to the greatest animation professor of all time, Mr. Theo Artz of Drexel University.

There's a theory that people don't see the exact same colors

Does that mean
*color is a pigment of you imagination*
huehuehuehue

Male sexbots are an interesting concept in theory

Until you try one and you lose him because he nuts and bolts

New Conspiracy Theory about 9/11

So, if you convert 9/11 into a decimal, you get 0.8181818181818181818181818181.... going on forever. What's the eighth letter of the alphabet? H. What's the first letter of the alphabet? A. That's right, ladies and germs. The Joker did 9/11.

Stephen Hawking's final theory, written just before he died, was released yesterday.

It's about time

At one time a falling Apple lead to the Theory of Gravity

Now it's just a broken iPhone

There is a conspiracy theory that claims Princess Diana was on the radio after her reported death.

I'd like to confirm this was completely true, she WAS on the radio, and the dashboard, the steering wheel, the back of the seats and the windscreen.

What do nerds and Creationists have in common?

They're offended by The Big Bang Theory.

Today I turned in my rough draft of a paper on Darwin's theory.

The teacher said it would be decent with modification.

I'm very good at math I can do number theory, combinatorics, but I cant bring myself to do graphs

That's where I draw the line

I have this theory about my s**... life lately

Actually, it's more of a hypothesis since I have no physical evidence to suggest it even exists.

The history of boy bands proves the theory of evolution

They all descended from The Monkees.

My brother is a big believer in Flat Earth Theory

but he is starting to come around.

My favourite conspiracy theory is ...

That everything is going to be ok.

According to the Big Bang Theory the universe began in Arizona

Our whole universe was in a hot dense state

What's the difference between the truth and a conspiracy theory?

About 6-12 months.

I've heard a theory that the dinosaurs died out because their eggs became rotten.

It was a mass egg-stink-tion!

Socialism sounds great in theory...

But in practice, you just gonna get couped by the CIA.

Did you know that Brian May, the guitarist from British rockband Queen, has a PhD on Astrophysics?

Yeah, he started his schooling before Queen formed, and achieved his PhD in 2007. One of his dissertations is heavily criticized by the science community though, and it's because he has an odd theory of what causes the Earth's rotation.
You see, he thinks that 'Fat Bottomed Girls make the Rockin World go round.'

Theory joke, Did you know that Brian May, the guitarist from British rockband Queen, has a PhD on Astrophysics?

jokes about theory