Delightful Fun The Remote Control Jokes for a Roaring Good Time
Chuck Norris once lost the remote, but maintained control of the TV by yelling at it in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich.
Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting weak?
I remember the first time I saw a universal remote control.
I thought to myself, "Well, this changes everything"
The control for the air conditioner was so far away
It was not even remotely close
A man is following me around with a remote control.
I think he's toying with me.
What did the remote controller say to the tv?
I know he turns you on but man, that guy just pushes my b**...!
It was a sad day when I discovered…
my new Universal Remote Control does not, in fact, control the Universe. Not even remotely.
Why did the T.V. break up with the remote?
She thought he was too controlling.
I bought a universal remote today.
I was disappointed to find out that it does not, in fact, control the universe. Not even remotely.
Who do you pat with encouragement when they fail to work?
A Remote control
What did the police man say when he arrested the remote control that beat up his wife?
'I charge you with battery'
You can explore the remote control ther reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean the remote control today dad jokes. There are also the remote control puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
What is the pinnacle of laziness?
Having a remote control for your remote control.
The guy who invented the remote control just died....
... They found him between the couch cushions.
The man who invented the remote control has sadly died.
His body was found down the back of the sofa.
The inventor of the remote control died.
But now nobody can find him...
Why do French people hate remote controls?
They are too easy Toulouse.
I am a television, and she is a remote control with no batteries...
She can't turn me on.
Why will button controlled remotes always be better than voice command?
It goes without saying.
The man who invented the TV remote control died...
He's going to be buried between two couch cushions.
What did the air conditioner say to its remote control?
You turn me on.
Breaking News! Self-aware remote control helicopters have just been invented.
They're flying of the shelves!
I have a degree in the design and mechanics of television controllers
I don't know what I'm going to do with this remote knowledge.
Tragedy, irony, but funny.
The man who invented the remote control passed away recently, they found him at home in between the couch cushions.
The man who invented the television remote control passed away today
They found him at home between the couch cushions.
If war is the father of invention, and necessity is the mother of invention...
Then laziness must be the drunk uncle with inventions like the remote control, la-z-boy, and the clapper.
Joe saw a s**... young exotic girl walking out from a bank, a remote control dropped from her mini skirt.
He picked it up and planed to give it back.
But the girl looked at him, her face turned red and seemed nervous and coy.
Joe understood it all of a sudden...
He smiled obscenely and pressed the button on the remote.
Then the bank exploded.
My remote control batteries died out today.
So I gave them away, free of charge.
It was a sad and disappointing day when I discovered my Universal Remote Control did not, in fact, control the Universe.
Not even remotely.
(I stole this joke from fb and it made my drunk a**... laugh out loud so I wanted to share but I'm sorry if it's a repost)
It was a sad and disappointing day
when I discovered my universal remote control did not in fact control the universe.
Not even remotely.
did you hear about the remote control that went to jail.
apparently he was charged with battery
I became best friends with my artificially intelligent remote control quadcopter named "ROTOR".
He is my **pal** n **drone**.
A single guy walks into a bar
A single guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. "I've been trying that online dating thing. Almost every single girl has the same old line in their profile," he tells the bartender. "Oh yeah, what line is that?" the bartender asks. "They all say, 'If I was meant to be controlled I would have come with a remote,'" the guy says. "Well the joke's on them. I've been turning women off without a remote for years."
