Thar Jokes
20 thar jokes and hilarious thar puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about thar that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Thar Short Jokes
Short thar jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The thar humour may include short fellers jokes also.
- A pirate goes to the doctor.. 'Thar be strange moles me back'
Doctors has a look.
'They're benign'
'Check again matey,I counted 10'
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Thar One Liners
Which thar one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with thar? I can suggest the ones about git and howdy.
- What did the pirate say when he walked into the brothel? arggg! thar she blows
- I really hate people thar take drugs Especially police and customs officers.
- What did the pirate say when someone went down on him? Thar she blows!
- The pirate mechanic fixed my sexbot this morning. "Thar, she blows."
- The pirate mechanic repaired my s**...-bot. Thar, she blows.
- What does a pirate say when finding a p**...? Thar she blows!
- Your mums so fat, when she performs o**... s**...... ...people shout "THAR SHE BLOWS!"
Cheerful Fun Thar Jokes to Brighten Your Day with Humor and Joy
What funny jokes about thar you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean fer jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make thar pranks.
A Sea Captain is complaining about how difficult his life is without a leg and an arm
He says to his crew mates, " When ye missin' two major parts of ye, thar ain't many things ye can do. "
The lookout hollers from the crow's nest " I 'ave it worse Captain! "
" Oh!? " The Sea Captain exclaims " 'n which two parts of ye be missin'? "
To which the lookout replies " Eye, eye Captain! "
A Pirate goes t' t' Doctors.
He says t' t' Doctor "I got these moles, moles I got and I'm very concerned about them" Doctor says "Don't be worried, they're benign" Pirate replies "Thank you Doctor but you cant count, thar be ten!"
One of them Deevorces
A backwoods country bumpkin goes to his lawyer and says, "Sir, I wanna git mahself one uh them thar deevorces."
The lawyer says, "Ok, well, you need grounds for a divorce."
The farmer says, "I has grounds sir, a hunderd an fitty acres of it."
The lawyer says, "No, I mean, you need a case!"
The farmer says, "I has one-uh them too! Keep mah doc-u-mints in it!".
The lawyer says, "No.... No.... You need a to file a suit."
The farmer says, "Sir, I has the suit, wear it tah church err'y Sumday."
The lawyer sighs. "Ok, let me put it to you this way... Is your wife a nagger?"
The farmer says, "No sir, wife's a white woman, 'bout 5 feet tall... Had herself a nagger baby though..."
Red Neck Computer Dictionary
* LOG ON: Makin' a woodstove hot.
* LOG OFF: Don't add no more wood.
* MONITOR: Keepin' an eye on the wood stove.
* DOWNLOAD: Gittin' the farwood off the truck.
* MEGA HERTZ: When you're not keerfull gittin' the farwood.
* FLOPPY DISC: Whutcha git from trying to tote too much farwood.
* RAM: That thar thing whut splits the farwood.
* HARD DRIVE: Gittin' home in the winter time.
* WINDOWS: Whut to shut when it's cold outside.
* SCREEN: Whut to shut when it's black fly season.
* BYTE: Whut them dang flys do.
* CHIP: Munchies fer the TV.
* MICRO CHIP: Whut's in the bottom of the munchie bag.
* MODEM: Whutcha do to the hay fields.
POLICE ROADBLOCK
Two r**..., Bubba and Earl, were driving down the road drinking a couple of bottles of Bud. The passenger, Bubba, said, "Lookey thar up ahead, Earl, it's a po-lice roadblock! We're gonna get busted fer drinkin' these here beers!" "Don't worry, Bubba," Earl said. "We'll just pull over and finish drinkin' these beers, peel off the label and stick it on our foreheads, and throw the bottles under the seat." "What fer?" asked Bubba. "Just let me do the talkin', OK?" said Earl. Well, they finished their beers, threw the empty bottles under the seat, and each put a label on their forehead. When they reached the roadblock, the sheriff said, "You boys been drinkin'?" "No sir," Earl said. "We're on the patch."
Beer-o-derm
One day, two r**... named Bubba and Earl were driving down the road, drinking a couple of Buds.
The passenger, Bubba, said, "Looky thar up ahead Earl. It's a po-leece roadblock.
We're gonna get busted fer drinkin' these here beers!"
"Don't worry Bubba," Earl said. "We'll just pull over and finish drinkin' these beers, peel off the label and stick it on our foreheads, then throw the bottles under the seat."
"What fer?" asked Bubba.
"Just let me do the talking, okay?" said Earl.
They finished their beers, threw the empty bottles under the seat and slapped the labels on their foreheads.
When they reached the roadblock, the sheriff said, "Have you boys been drinking?"
"No sir." said Earl. "We're on the patch."
A Texan's three daughters have a date tonight...
(This joke is especially good live with you miming the actions and doing onomatopoeia - )
A Texan's triplet daughters are going to their first date tonight, so he stands behind their door waiting for their dates to show up.
The first guy arrives, opens the door, and the Texan's cocked a gun at his head. c**...-ik! "Who goes thar?"
He stammers "H-hi! My name's Louie, I'm here to get Ruthie and we're going to the movies."
Tex calls Ruthie down and they leave.
The second guy arrives, opens the door, and the Texan's cocked a gun at his head. c**...-ik! "Who goes thyar?"
He winces "Hi! My names Freddie, I'm here to get Betty and we're gonna get spaghetti. Is she ready?"
Tex calls Betty down and they leave.
The third guy arrives, opens the door, and the Texan's cocked a gun at his head. c**...-ik! "Who goes thar?"
He waves, "Hi! My name's Chuck..."
\> ***BLAM!****!****!*** <
