The Best 69 Thailand Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Thailand jokes. There are some thailand brazil jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these thailand breaststroke puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Thailand Jokes and Puns

A company in Thailand recently opened the first combination brothel/tennis facility.

They operate on a first come / first serve basis.

I had a near miss on my a flight to Thailand.

Well a pre-op Transsexual.

What's your favorite city in Thailand?

Phuket, I don't know...

Thailand joke, What's your favorite city in Thailand?

"Its a boy", he shouted. "It's a BOY! I still can't believe it!

Tears rolling down his eyes, swearing never to come back to Thailand again.

I was on the train this afternoon...

when I sat across from a very attractive babe from Thailand.

I spent the next 10 minutes thinking to myself, "don't get an erection, please don't get an erection". But she did.

Made in Thailand

Have you heard of the mountain climber from Bangkok?

He became famous as the Thai of the Eiger.


Who won the election for mayor of Bangkok?

It was a Thai.

Girls in Thailand are like a box of chocolates

Some of them have nuts

Thailand joke, Girls in Thailand are like a box of chocolates

I'm quitting my job and moving to Thailand


Planned to go to Thailand for my vaca this year but after hearing about the ladyboys I thought


Have you ever visited the area between Thailand and Vietnam?

Don't bother. It's pretty Laos-y.

A physicist, a biologist, and a geologist walk into a bar.

The physicist immediately liquors up and attempts to pick up chicks with his top secret details about a new slightly-cooler-than-molten-hot fusion project he's working on.

The biologist attempts to pick up chicks with stories about him working with baby elephants in Thailand.

The geologist says "Ouch".

You can explore thailand malaysia reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean thailand cambodia dad jokes. There are also thailand puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

"It's a boy!"

...he screamed, "it's a boy!".

Tears rolling down his face, and he vowed to never go back to Thailand.

I asked a Southeast-Asian-looking elderly gentleman if he was from Thailand.

He said, "Yeah, Siam."

I'm thinking of opening a store that only sells neckties...

Think i'll name it... Thailand.

Brothels in Thailand have a red and white striped pole outside like a barbars shop!

I didn't know!

Imagine my shock when I went in and asked for a 'number 2 all over'

Apparently there are midget prostitutes in Thailand who cost less than a dollar.

Clearly they're selling themselves short.

Thailand joke, Apparently there are midget prostitutes in Thailand who cost less than a dollar.

Whats the age of consent in Thailand?


Always bring a rogue with you when you go to Thailand

They're good at detecting traps

What do you call a people who serve in Thailand?

Thai Fighters

My African-American friend hooked up with a girl from Thailand...

It was a real black-Thai affair.

How is driving a Ford truck similar to visiting Thailand?

Either way, you're likely to blow a tranny

"It's a boy!" I shouted tears rolling down my face "I don't believe it. A boy!"

Its at that moment I decided I'd never visit Thailand again.

Is is hard to impersonate an African man native to Thailand?

I just really want to get into one of those black Thai events.

I dropped everything and went to Thailand

Because Phuket.

How do you spot a Jewish paedophile in Thailand?

He brings his own kids.

So a man goes on vacation to Asia...

and while he is travelling in Thailand, he falls in love with a local woman. He decides to take her back to the US with him to get married. They go back to the US and get married. Everyone is happy and healthy. A few years go by, and the man meets one of his friends in a bar. He starts to catch up with him, when his friend asks "Hey, where's that wife of yours?"

"Oh, she died rather suddenly."

"I'm sorry to hear that, what happened?"

"Prostate cancer."

My friend went to Thailand to get a sex change. It was taking a bit longer than expected.

So I mailed to ask if he was still a broad.

I met a girl in Thailand and when we went back to her place I had an unpleasant surprise...

She was a woman.

Thai Massage

A guy during his vacation to Thailand, ordered a massage session in his room, one for his wife and one for him.

After massaging the man for a long time, the Thai girl said, "Massage Pinis... Sir!"

He kept quiet ...

The Thai masseuse again said, "Massage Pinis... Sir!"

There was again silence.

Finally his wife spoke, "Don't have high hopes...She's saying 'Massage Finish' ..."

What's the name of Thailands bloodiest kickboxer?

Tam Pon

what do you eat at a formal event in thailand?

black thai curry

What's the one place in Thailand where people don't care?


What do you call a female chicken from thailand?


Told my dad that 12 boys from a junior football team are lost in a flooded cave in Thailand.

Dad: He told me they should call a priest.

Me: Dad! They could still be alive.

Dad: Yes I believe that they are still alive as well, just toss a priest in the cave and he'll find those boys real quick.

The boys trapped in a cave in Thailand need to become diving experts to escape

Sounds like a job for Neymar

"The 12 boys stranded in a flooded cave system in Thailand have started diving lessons in the latest step in efforts to bring them out alive."

I think they've hired Naymar.

[NSFW] I like my Rolex watches like I like my female prostitutes.

From Thailand, cheap, and the first part of the name is fake

A Nigerian prince secretly orders a 2nd wife over the internet from Thailand.

The wedding was a black-tie affair

Now that Neymar's out of the World cup, he's heading to Thailand.

To rescue those kids, no better diver in the world.

When the little boys stuck in that cave in Thailand are rescued, there's definitely gonna be a movie. There's a ex US Navy Seal helping. They're gonna make the movie all about him

and have Scarlett Johansen playing one of the Thai boys.

Tell you what, it's lucky that those Kids trapped in the cave in Thailand are footballers

It means they're already good divers.

Brazil have sent star player Neymar to Thailand to help rescue the young footballers in the cave

...they heard they needed someone to teach them how to dive

My friend was surprised when I said I hadn't heard about the kids in Thailand being rescued

Where have you been? Living in a cave?

I heard from the news that they finally got all the boys out of the cave.

Another happy ending in Thailand, it seems.

What's the difference between Thailand and America?

Thailand reunites boys with their families.

Now that the Wild Boars are all safe...

...Thailand maintains its reputation of happy endings.

Neymar is meeting up with the Thailand football team who were trapped in a cave...

He's going to teach them how to dive

You know what's weird about the situation in Thailand?

The coach never taught the boys how to dive.

Why did Neymar make a quick exit at the world cup in Russia?

He heard divers were needed in Thailand

I was crying and yelling: It's a boy! I cannot believe's a boy!

– Mike, 32, abruptly ending his holiday in Thailand

What is worse than caving in Thailand?

Caving in Helsinki.

Hey girl are you a cave in Thailand?

Cause I wanna leave some kids inside you

When I was in Thailand I had a driver that ran through all the red lights.

I got mad at him but he said he was a professional driver. When he stopped at a green light I asked why, and he said Just in case there are other professional drivers out there

What does A&W and Thailand have in common?

You can have 2 teens for $5

I was with a girl in Thailand recently. She was a butternuts.

Everything about was hot but her nuts.

I was on a plane recently and the stewardess said that in the event of an accident i had to stick my head between my legs.

I couldn't help thinking,

'if i could do that i wouldn't be flying to Thailand in the first place.'

What do you call it when you order a Thailand prostitute?

A trans-action :-)

What do men in Thailand say when they can't get girls?

Phuket! I'm just going to Bangkok instead!

It was 11 years ago today that my pal Joey came running out of that room shouting it's a boy it's a boy with tears streaming down his face.

We never went back to Thailand.

Minutes ago , my brother ran out of the room with tears in his eyes shouting : it is a boy , it is a boy !

Dont go to Thailand , my worst trip so far !

Today, 10 years ago.

My buddy came running out. It's a boy! He shouted.

We haven't been to Thailand since.

My Mexican cousin who can't speak a word of English just came back from Thailand all bloodied up. I asked him "que paso?"

He said muy Thai

What is the difference between the US and Thailand?

In the US you deal with mail fraud

In Thailand you deal with male fraud

Exactly 10 years ago my pal Jon came running out shouting it's a boy with tears streaming down his face...

We never went back to Thailand

Why are massages in Thailand better than in the United States?

In Thailand, an average sized woman walks on your back. In the United States, an average sized woman walks on your back.

Mark Zuckerberg's car hit a guy's car

Mark Zuckerberg's car hit a guy's car

Guy (angry) : Do you know who I am?

Mark : Yes, you are Scott Thomas, you have 237 friends out of which 37 are females and your wife doesn't know 12 of them. Last holiday you went to Thailand and there you . . .

Guy : Leave it bro, it was my fault.

Two girls from Thailand asked me if I wanted to sleep with them.

They said that it would be like winning the Lottery.

To my horror they were right, we had six matching balls.

I was on a plane recently and the flight attendant was doing the safety announcement 'In the event of an emergency please put your head between your knees" and a voice at the back of the plane shouted out..

" If I could do that I wouldn't be flying to Thailand"....

It was 11 years ago today

My friend Rob came running in the room, tears in his eyes, shouting "It's a boy it's a boy". We never went back to Thailand

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the thailand neymar jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working thailand excursion piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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