Texting And Driving Jokes
44 texting and driving jokes and hilarious texting and driving puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about texting and driving that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Texting And Driving Short Jokes
Short texting and driving jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The texting and driving humour may include short texting driving jokes also.
- On my way home from work saw a man texting while driving.. Knowing how dangerous this can be I pulled up next to him, rolled down my window and threw my beer at him.
- I hate when I'm driving and I see people text and drive. It makes me want to throw my beer can at them.
- Yesterday I saw a girl driving next to me while texting on her phone... I was so disgusted by her irresponsible driving that I rolled down my window and threw my beer at her.
- So I was driving home from work tonight, I saw a woman texting whilst driving. It infuriated me so much I threw my beer bottle at her car.
- Some idiot was texting and driving and rear ended my car. It spilled my beer all over the place.
- I almost got into an accident with someone who was texting and driving... luckily I braked just in time or else I would've spilt my beer.
- A lot of people text while driving. I'm not excusing it, but we've all done things we regret while we're drunk.
- Saw a "Don't Text and Drive" sign on my way into work today. Good thing I took a second to look up from my phone, otherwise I may have missed it.
- A lady cut me off... The other day a lady cut me off who was texting while driving. I got so mad at her I pulled up beside her and threw my beer can at her.
- I was driving down the highway today and saw a woman in the lane next to me reading a novel while driving I was so angry that I stopped texting and flipped her off
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Texting And Driving One Liners
Which texting and driving one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with texting and driving? I can suggest the ones about texting and drinking and driving.
- My friend text me 'what are you doing now?' I replied 'Probably failing my driving test'.
- Drive safe I saw a driver texting and driving.
It made me so mad I threw my beer at him. - Text and drive? Oh cell no
- They say 3 out of 4 people text and drive Not me; I watch YouTube videos.
- I refuse to text and drive... I always end up spilling my beer.
- I need to stop texting while driving It's really hurting my golf game.
- Once a driver texting and driving & getting accident.
- What happens when you text while driving? I don't know, I've never tri
- Honk if you love Jesus.. Text while driving if you want to meet him.
- I texted and drive sometimes I guess we all do s**... things when we're drunk
Texting And Driving Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about texting and driving you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean driving jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make texting and driving pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A cop gave me a ticket for texting and driving.
But I got out of it because I could prove I was just taking a picture of my c**....
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I saw a lady texting and driving today
I was furious. I rolled down my window, and threw my beer at her.
I tried to text and drive to test whether or not i get distracted
But I can text just fine!
A Saudi Arabian prince is going to college in England
He texts his father,
"Dad, I feel weird driving my Lamborghini to school when all my classmates take a train"
His father replies;
"Son, I have transferred 500 million dollars into your account. Go out and buy a train and stop embarrassing this family"
The sign down the highway said "Don't be a turkey, don't text and drive"
They misspelled vegetable.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Texting while driving is incredibly s**... and dangerous
You're practically begging for typos.
Car accidents and dwarves.
A man was texting and driving and generally not paying attention to the road. As he approached the stoplight, he slammed on his breaks a bit too late and collided into the car in front of him. Flustered, he searched for his insurance and waited for the man in the car in front of him to approach him.
He saw the car door in front of him open and out walked a very short, slightly chubby man with long gray hair and a beard to match. The man approached his window with an angry look and exclaimed, "I'm not *happy!*"
Giving him a second look, the man asked, "Then which one are you?"
This morning I was texting and driving and then I had to stop
Because my car ran out of gas.
Today I saw a girl driving while texting, applying makeup, AND adjusting her mirrors
I was so shocked I spat out my beer
They banned texting while driving in my state...
...Now I read books and practice juggling.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I saw a women texting and driving in the lane next to mine...
Incensed, I rolled my window down and threw my beer at her.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I've had it with people texting and driving.
if i see one more person on their phone while driving im going to roll my window down and throw my beer at them.
How to communicate with God
A poster is found in all French churches. The translation is:
"By entering this church it may be possible that you hear "the call of God". However, it is less probable that He will call you on your mobile. Thank you for turning off your phones. If you want to talk to God, enter, choose a quiet place and talk to him. If you want to see him, send him a text while driving."
A man is texting and driving in his ford
By doing so he crashed and the car is totalled.
You could say he lost his focus.