The Best 20 Temperatures Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Temperatures jokes. There are some temperatures warmer jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these temperatures finite puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Temperatures Jokes and Puns

How to solve Global Warming:

Convince republicans that rising temperatures are turning people gay.

Record low temperatures causing snow and freezing all over the southern United States.

Finally: white people in Texas are having problems with ICE.

How do you solve climate change?

Convince Republicans that rising temperatures are turning people gay.

Temperatures joke, How do you solve climate change?

A cold snap across the United States has seen Texas dealing with temperatures as low as -18

The demand for electricity has led to blackouts across the state, causing some people to go without Fox News for so long, they've stopped blaming the weather on Joe Biden.

Two blondes go deep into the frozen woods searching for a Christmas tree...

After hours and hours of sub-zero temperatures, a few close calls with hungry wolves, one blonde turns to the other and says, "Enough is enough! I'm chopping down the next tree I see! I don't care whether it's decorated or not!"


Turns out that Roy Moore is having a bad influence on weather in Alabama.

The temperatures are flirting with the teens this week.

My deaf-mute postman has such a tough job. He starts work at 3am. In summer he gets attacked by dogs and in winter he has to brave through sub-zero temperatures. But in spite of all this....

I've never heard him complain

Temperatures joke, My deaf-mute postman has such a tough job. He starts work at 3am. In summer he gets attacked by dogs

Only SEVEN people die as temperatures as low as -42F wreak havoc across the American Midwest.

Apparently guns don't work in those temperatures.

Did you hear about who lived in absolute zero temperatures?

He is 0K now!

How do you feel if subjected to temperatures of absolute zero?

0K

Hey, do you want to come back to my place and regulate our body temperatures using external sources?

No hom(e)o(stasis)

You can explore temperatures temperature reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean temperatures colder dad jokes. There are also temperatures puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


You Know What Really Makes My Blood Boil?

Temperatures Of Over 100 Degrees Celsius.

What do R. Kelly and current temperatures have in common?

They're both in the teens.

It's significantly harder for athletes to perform in todays temperatures

I've read in the newspaper that the Government has forbidden fans at sport events

Why are normal human body temperatures around 98.7*F?

Because we're all a little obtuse.

My Dad and I walk outside in sub-zero temperatures, and he's wearing a t-shirt.

Me: "Dad, it's really cold, don't you want to wear a coat?"
Dad: "I'm just exercising my second-ammendment rights."
Me: "........."
Dad: "My right to bare arms."

Temperatures joke, My Dad and I walk outside in sub-zero temperatures, and he's wearing a t-shirt.

The Nasa Parker Solar probe will be 4 million miles away from the sun

Due to the high temperatures it will have to operate at night.

Measuring temperatures to three significant figures is overrated

1 significant figure is 0K

The emperor penguin mates at temperatures as low as -120 degrees F.

He is a frigid midget with a rigid digit.


When does an increase in degrees not lead to warmer temperatures?

When you get your Masters in Art History, but you still can't pay the heating bill

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the temperatures stockpile jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working temperatures kelvin piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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