The Best 37 Temp Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Temp jokes. There are some temp permanent jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these temp laborer puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 of the Funniest Temp Jokes and Puns
What temperature do you bake two pies?
360 degrees
What is the temperature of the average coffin?
6 Below
does anyone think the temple is hypnotic?
And is that intentional?
I have a temperature of -273.15°C
Don't worry. I'm 0K
My friend got a job at a temp agency, getting a job giving people jobs
So he's basically a prostitute
went to a temporary tatoo parlor
it wouldn't wash off so I went back to complain but the shop was gone.
Surgeon's joke.
There used to be a rule that in order to get into anesthesia, applicants had to have an IQ greater than their body temp. For a while they couldn't get any new anesthesia trainees because nobody would pass.
Then they decided to switch from farenheit to celsius, and now there's a lot of them.
Where was Soloman's temple located?
On the side of his head.
I guess some things will never change...
I hired a temp while my secretary was on maternity leave.
Trying to arrive at an agreeable wage, I asked what she expected to earn.
She said, "Well... the minimum I could work for is $400 a week.
"I told her I'd give her that much with pleasure. She shook her head and replied,
"With pleasure, it'll be $600 a week."
What's the temperate inside of a ton-ton?
What's the temperature inside of a ton-ton?
Lukewarm.
A: Took my temperature today.
B: Oh really?
A: No, rectally.
You can explore temp excel reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean temp jobless dad jokes. There are also temp puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
I am for temperance...
... but I don't exaggerate it.
What do Tempurpedic mattresses and raptors have in common?
"They remember"
My body's a tempel
But only because it hates Palestine
A tempting offer
I was tempted by an offer which read, Sausage Biscuits 2 for $1.00".
"How much is it for one? I asked.
"75 cents , she replied.
"Ok, I'll have the other one".
A temple for atheists...
Is a "nonprophet" organisation.
What temperature is best for helping babies grow?
Womb temperature.
How do you take the temperature of a gorilla ?
With great caution.
The nurse sauntered in with the thermometer...
She was here to temp me.
What do you use to take a cow's temperature?
A thermoometer.
How do you take a lion's temperature?
Carefully
What is the temperature of the inside of a Taun-Taun?
Luke warm.
What is the temperature of a tauntaun?
What temperature are babies cooked in?
Womb temperature
I was really tempted to say mean things about an obese animal
But I decided not to because that would be hippo-critical.
No wonder the devil has so much wealth to temp people with...
He's been laundering money in an off-sheol account.
What's the temperature of a light saber?
Warm Warm
Why did Freddy Mercury stay home from school?
He had a temp of 200 degrees Farenheit.
I once had a temp job at a prune processing plant
It was a plumb assignment
The temperature is so cold outside...
that if you make your girlfriend wet, you also make her hard.
What happens when the temperature drops during a torrential rain?
The weather goes straight to hail.
Sorry about the temperature down the mine today
It's coal man
What temperature do you bake 2pi?
360 degrees.
Trigonometric joke I created myself
What temperature does a caterpillar like?
Worm Temperature
A coworker of mine, Celsuis recently retired. The company hired a guy named Kelvin to replace him.
He's the new temp!
A coworker named Celsius recently retired at my work, so they hired a guy named Kelvin to replace him.
He's the new temp.
What's the temperature in a taun taun?
lukewarm
Credit to my friend James for that.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the temp developer jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working temp temporary piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.