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Telescope Jokes

55 telescope jokes and hilarious telescope puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about telescope that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

With jokes about the James Webb Telescope, the Hubble Telescope, space exploration and the planets, this hilarious compilation of Telescope Jokes is sure to make you laugh out of this world. From asteroids to planets, these jokes will have you looking at space exploration in a whole new way.

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Popular Telescope Short Jokes

Short telescope jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The telescope humour may include short binoculars jokes also.

  1. My telescope broke the other day and I was hoping the local observatory could repair it They said they'd look into it.
  2. Have you guys seen the new image from James Webb telescope yet? I heard it looks back in time like 13.7 billion years... ...and it still can't see the last time you got laid.
  3. I think my neighbor is stalking me through her computer, because I've seen her google my name. I'm certain I saw it on my telescope last night.
  4. I got second place in a star gazing competition once. The winner got a telescope, but all I got was a constellation prize.
  5. Why did the James Webb telescope have to go a million miles out into space? So it can see past your mom.
  6. My friend sent me a link to download the images from the James Webb Telescope. I told him I would download them, but I don't have space on my phone.
  7. Telescopes use mirrors Therefore we could be looking at space vampires and we'd never know it.
  8. Why can't a pulsar be observed by any computer controlled optical telescope? Video killed the radio star.
  9. I think my neighbor might be stalking me because she won't stop googling me. I saw it through my telescope last night
  10. My friend suggested that I get a telescope as I'm so interested in astronomy I said I'll look into it.

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Telescope One Liners

Which telescope one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with telescope? I can suggest the ones about microscope and astronomer.

  1. TIL You can watch the sun through a telescope without any filters. Only twice though...
  2. Why are telescopes pointed away from earth? Because they search for intelligent life
  3. I've never owned a telescope... But it's something I'm thinking of looking into
  4. You guys ever heard of a horoscope? It's like a telescope but it can only see your mom.
  5. Have you considered getting a telescope? You really should look into it.
  6. Which planet appears largest in a telescope? Earth
  7. I wanted to buy a telescope.... But the cost is astronomical.
  8. I think my neighbor is stalking me... I saw her googling my name through my telescope.
  9. I'm doing market research for a telescope manufacturer, I run the focus group.
  10. What does a cow see with a telescope? Mooooooooon.
  11. What did the male telescope say to the hot female telescope? HUBBLE HUBBLE!
  12. Where are all the women in amateur astronomy? At the other end of the telescope.
  13. Do you know how to use a telescope? You should look into it.
  14. My estranged father bought me a telescope for Christmas We're a lot closer now.
  15. Somebody whacked my head with a telescope today I was seeing stars

Space Telescope Jokes

Here is a list of funny space telescope jokes and even better space telescope puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Because telescopes work using mirrors... We'll never know if there are any space vampires.
  • When someone replies late... If NASA can find a way to send an image of Pluto using that Hubble Space Telescope from 4.67 billion miles then why can't you message me?

Webb Telescope Jokes

Here is a list of funny webb telescope jokes and even better webb telescope puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Exciting news from the James Webb Telescope... They have detected a new planet that is almost the size of one of Zelensky's b**...
Telescope joke, Exciting news from the James Webb Telescope...

Hubble Telescope Jokes

Here is a list of funny hubble telescope jokes and even better hubble telescope puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Your momma's so fat, last time she wore a glitter dress... ... the Hubble telescope thought it had discovered a new galaxy.
  • What was the telescope's catch-phrase? Stay Hubble.
  • What did the astronomer say to the telescope in l**...? "Hubble, Hubble."
Telescope joke, What did the astronomer say to the telescope in l**...?

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about telescope can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of telescope puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Laughter Telescope Jokes for Everyone for Fun and Frivolity

What funny jokes about telescope you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean eye glass jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make telescope prank.

I stared intensely as my neighbour removed the red dress, then the bra, then the silk underwear.

"Oo yeah," I whispered to myself, as I looked through my telescope, "you keep emptying that washing machine, baby."

A Sea Captain looks through his telescope

and sees ships approaching on the horizon. He says to his first mate "Arrrr Matey, fetch me me red shirt".
"But why, Captain?" the Mate says.
"If these be enemies and we must defend our ship I don't want me men to see me bleed".
The mate fetches the shirt as the Captain looks out again, this time seeing a fleet of Pirate Ships gaining on them. He turns to the first mate again:
"Arrr Matey, fetch me me brown pants".

Using the new James Webb telescope, scientists recently discovered an enormous object in deep space that shares nearly identical chemical composition as humor in the human brain.

Ultimately it was determined to be no laughing matter

Amazon Asked Me to Write a Review

Amazon asked for feedback on the used telescope I bought from their site.
I was honest with my review: "This telescope s**.... Two Stars."

As the first fleet rounded the headlands and sailed into botany bay the local Aborigines could see several men looking towards them through big fancy telescopes. One of the Aborigines comments "s**... white man,

can't even play the didgeridoo".

I think my neighbor is stalking me as she's been Googling my name on her computer.

I saw it through my telescope last night. 

My wife told me that cooking was getting very very difficult due to her 8 months pregnancy

So I added telescope handles on all of the kitchen utensils. I love my wife.

A guy asks his friend " have you ever used a telescope ?"

" No, is it fun ?" Answers the latter
" yeah you should look into it "

My neighbor's been stalking me

I think my neighbor is stalking me. She searched up my name last night, I saw through her bedroom window. Thank god I have this telescope.

A pirate captain was sailing to Antarctica in search of treasure.

One morning, his first mate woke him.
Captain, the ship won't move! The ocean is frozen solid!
The pirate captain rose from his bed, yawned, and stretched. After a good scratch, he put on his boots and coat, and strode out of his quarters.
As he arrived at the bow of the ship, his men gathered around in nervous anticipation. He pulled out his pocket telescope and took a good, long look around the entire horizon. He collapsed his telescope, placed it back in his pocket, and clasped his hands behind his back. After some time, he tipped his head down toward his first mate and said:
Ice sea.

Telescope joke, A pirate captain was sailing to Antarctica in search of treasure.

jokes about telescope

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these telescope jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.