Technique Jokes
52 technique jokes and hilarious technique puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about technique that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Technique Short Jokes
Short technique jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The technique humour may include short technician jokes also.
- I just started practicing some speed reading techniques. Last night I read "War and peace" in about 10 seconds. I know it's only 3 words but it's a start!
- How do you know archeologists are lonely? Theyre always coming up with new dating techniques.
- I got a DVD on how to improve your foreplay techniques.... I had to fast forward through all the boring bits in the beginning though.
- Biblical Parenting Techniques Joseph: What should we do about Jesus acting up in school?
Mary: I don't know it's not like raising the Son of God came with Emmanuel - I'd like to teach you how to win any argument. Unfortunately my wife won't teach me her technique.
- My girlfriend has been trying new things in the bedroom lately.. ...I have a headache, I'm stressed, and I've eaten too much are among her many new techniques.
- Who's your favourite Canadian music icon that also practices advanced culinary technique which enhances the flavour of poultry at the atomic level? Brine Atoms
- I was visiting a jam factory the other day, They asked me if I had heard of any of the new techniques being used to grow berries. I told them that I wasn't up to date on my currant events.
- what's the difference between Modeling and Yodeling? One's to form an orderly orderly orderly orderly queue and the other is a singing technique
- What's the difference between spitting, swallowing and gargling? Love, true love, expert technique.
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Technique One Liners
Which technique one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with technique? I can suggest the ones about mechanism and techno.
- CIA finally succeeded in killing Fidel Castro Using the innovative 'Old age' technique
- Why do archaeologists get all the girls? Because they have the best dating techniques.
- What type of fighting technique do amputees practice? Partial arts.
- Gotta go to a lecture on drilling techniques. Talk about boring.
- Why are geologists so good at getting laid? They know the best dating techniques.
- What's a dictator's favorite debating technique? Stalin
- What technique does a prisoner use when coloring a picture? Cell shading.
- I saw a how-to page on record scratch and DJ techniques. It was a wikki-wikki Wiki.
- Five most popular enhanced interrogation techniques.. .. The fourth one will shock you!
- Because of the disregard towards safety techniques people not only die but are also born.
- What is an Arabs favorite fighting technique? Hijab
- So i found a new clickbait technique. So did you.
- What was Alfred Hitchcock's favorite film technique? The crane shot.
- The pilot's surefire technique
- Have you hear about the ancient Chinese technique for winning at video games?
Howlingly Hilarious Technique Jokes for an Unforgettable Evening
What funny jokes about technique you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean trick jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make technique pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I discovered a Star Wars themed s**... technique...
I call it the Hands Solo
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
New s**... technique
A man and his wife are in bed and things start to heat up. After a little bit of foreplay the man suddenly stops. His wife asks "What's wrong? Is it me?" The man replies " No I learned this on Pornhub, it's called buffering."
"Doctor, I think my wife has a hearing problem. "
A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, I think my wife has a hearing problem. She doesn't seem to hear what ever I tell her."
The doctor replies, "Oh, is that so? Well, let me try to help you. Just try this method when you get home today. Stand around 50 feet from her and ask her something. If she doesn't hear it, reduce the gap by 10 feet and so on till she can hear what you say."
The man satisfied with the reply, hurries home to try this little technique. He stands around 50 feet away from her, and shouts, "Hey honey, what's for dinner today?" He gets no response, so he moves closer and repeats the same question four more times till he's right next to her.
He asks the same question again and she says, "For heaven's sake, this is the fifth time I'm telling you, it's just fruit salad tonight!"
A company hire an efficiency expert as a consultant.
To everyone's surprise, the presentation was very interesting. For once many felt like this was a valuable use of time! as the presenter finished up, he said, "I hope you have found use in my presentation today, but I would warn you, be careful about using these techniques at home. The other night I was watching as my wife did the dinner dishes, and noticed some inefficiency in her technique. Wanting to be helpful, I advised her of several small improvements that could add up to maximum efficiency."
One of the attendees raised their hand,"Did it work? Did the dishwashing become more efficient?"
"Oh yes," the consultant replied,"before my advice, my wife took 18 minutes to finish the dishes, now I do it in 12."
First baby born with DNA from 3 people
This week the world's first baby was born with DNA from three different people using a new controversial technique developed by US scientists. The baby will be featured in the upcoming episode of Maury and spoiler alert, they're both the father.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
That's the problem with writing books about s**... techniques
... you only get negative reviews.
When using the bathroom I've adopted a two flush technique
One flush to - ya know - flush it down and another flush to wash my hands, it works a lot better than doing it all in one flush.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A man goes on a date with a patent examiner.
Things are going well, so they go back to his place, and end up having s**....
Afterwards, the man asks his date, "So, do you want to do this again tomorrow?"
His date replies: "I will report that your technique, while novel, is obvious to one skilled in the art. Also I found some of your more extraordinary claims to be unsubstantiated."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The United States doesn't use t**... techniques such as water boarding
The prefer the term "tactical baptism"
I'm trying to learn how to be a more sensitive lover.
I watched a video called "How to improve your foreplay technique", it was really good.
I had to skip through the boring bit at the beginning.
My girlfriend is the star of the local police department's bomb squad.
When asked what is her secret to such skilled techniques, she responded:
Plenty of practice every night with a short fuse and explosions that go off early.
I wasn't doing great in school, I was stressed out and acting up, so the school tried this new technique on me.
It's called a de-tension.
I miss my old piano teacher...
My old piano instructor said to me, "You've damaged my piano for the last time! I won't teach you anymore!"
I found a new teacher. But his piano is missing strings, and worst of all, his damper pedal technique is terrible. I miss my old instructor; she knew when to put her foot down.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
How does a cannibal comedian practice comedy?
He uses different techniques to probe where the most humerus content is.
A man spends his days studying archeology at university, and his nights dreaming of someday finding a girlfriend.
No matter how hard he tried, he could never master the techniques of dating.
Eventually, his professors had to fail him.
Scottish engineers have developed a new technique using microwaves for sterilising ambulances. They predict it will take the time to clean one down to under ten minutes.
The problem is getting the ambulance in without breaking the glass plate at the bottom
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Russian and an American get on a plane in Moscow and get to talking.
The Russian says he works for the Kremlin and he's on his way to go learn American p**... techniques.
"What American p**... techniques?" asks the American.
"Exactly," the Russian replies.
