The Best 36 Technician Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Technician jokes. There are some technician repairman jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these technician systems puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Technician Jokes and Puns

I have a Russian friend who's a sound technician

And a Czech one too.
A Czech one too.

I'm dating an x-ray technician...

But I don't know what she sees in me.

True story: Two of the veterinarians at my place of employment amputated a dogs cancerous leg today.

As the junior Doctor brought the leg across the room, he shook it a little and made ghost noises.

the technician watching with me turned and said,

"I don't find that humerus"

Technician joke, True story: Two of the veterinarians at my place of employment amputated a dogs cancerous leg today.

LPT: Never tell a sound technician how they are doing.

They hate feedback.

A blond has just purchased a set of tires...

...and asks, "do I ever need to change the air?" the technician chuckles and says, "no.. these new tires should never need new air. But you should rotate them every 10,000 miles."
The blond thinks for a moment and says, "Don't they spin while I'm driving?"


What did the Mexican lab technician say when he read the blood tests of a patient who's been showing no improvement?

Ooh, no dose trace.

What did the Mexican lab technician say when he tested his son's urine for drugs.

Ooh, NoDoz traced.

Technician joke, What did the Mexican lab technician say when he tested his son's urine for drugs.

The photo technician got caught masterbating to people's photos

They charged him with "indecent exposure"

How do IT technicians prefer to be paid?

Cache in hand.

My X-ray technician told me she usually doesn't go on dates with her patients...

...but she saw something in me.

I was speaking to a computer technician.

"How do you make a motherboard?" I asked him.

He said, "Tell her about my job."

You can explore technician programmer reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean technician technical dad jokes. There are also technician puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


Did you hear about the sound technician that got fired recently?

Apparently he couldn't handle feedback.

How many New Jersians or Oregonians does it take to fuel a car?

One, if they are a qualified, trained vehicle fueling technician.

A technician is called to inspect q gas leak at an anesthesiologist's office

Upon arrival, he said: "Huh, this smells like chlorofor".

[OC] So a Comcast technician asks a woman on a date

Surprisingly, she says yes. He says "Great! Be at your house on Tuesday and I'll pick you up anywhere from 11am to 6pm." - Inspired by my recent internet installation experience.

I once had a girlfriend who was an X-Ray technician.

I could never lie to her, because she always saw right through me.

Technician joke, I once had a girlfriend who was an X-Ray technician.

The Time Travelling Soldier

When a soldier came to the clinic where I work for an MRI, he was put into the machine by an attractive, young technician. Sometime later, when the examination was over, he was helped out of the machine by a far older woman. The soldier remarked, How long was I in there for?  

I'm trying to remember that movie where the golden retriever becomes an audio technician...

Was it... Ear Bud?

Why did the Eunuch lose his job as a HVAC technician?

Because he couldn't produce airs.


"When one door closes another door opens" -

smart home owner describing his problem to a support technician.

Why did the rookie technician allow a German zeppelin to fly over Allied airspace?

It was just a blimp on the radar.

A computer technician came over to fix my wife's laptop.

"Looks like you need an upgrade," he said.

"Do you think so?" she questioned.

He added, "I do, but I'm sure he's a nice guy."

I couldn't live with my mistakes anymore...

So I became a bomb disposal technician

A man takes his computer to a repair shop, claiming that the CD drive wasn't working...

The technician asks him, "When did it break?"

"Sometime between this morning and four years ago."

As a colour blind bomb technician

You only defuse a bomb once

My wife was getting an MRI. The technician repeatedly told her to make sure she held very still.

Oh no problem, she said. My husband is a mortician.

Bad part about being a bomb disposal technician.....

It takes me 6 hours to open my Christmas presents.

An audio technician becomes a comedian

An audio technician is on stage at an open mic night in a comedy club.

He seems to be absolutely crushing the audience with witty and outrageous jokes.

At the end of his time he gets to do a mic drop.

That was the last night he ever did comedy.

The feedback ruined it.

Why did the computer technician get kicked out of the army?

He had troubleshooting.

I have a Polish friend who's a sound technician.

Oh, and a Czech one too. Czech one too. Czech one too.

What do you call an old sound technician with one arm?

Mono.

I have a Polish friend who's a sound technician

And a Czech one, too

I have a Russian friend who's a sound technician ...

I have a Czech one, too.

If you say AT&T backwards

You sound like a Canadian Bomb Technician.

What is the similarity between a communist and an IT technician?

They both believe restarting it might work.

Carolyn, a rich blonde, buys a new automatic Jaguar XKR Sport. She drives the car perfectly well during the day, but at night, it just won't move at all. After trying to drive at night for a week, with no luck, she furiously calls the dealers and they send out a technician to help...

He examines the car and finds nothing wrong with it, so he asks, "Ma'am, are you sure you are using the right gears?"

Full of anger, she growls, "How on earth you could ask such a question!? I'm not stupid you know! Of course I am using the right gears; I use D during the day and N at night."

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the technician toolbox jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working technician paramedic piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes