Tattooed Jokes
47 tattooed jokes and hilarious tattooed puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about tattooed that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Tattooed Short Jokes
Short tattooed jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The tattooed humour may include short tattoos jokes also.
- People always ask where I got my incredibly detailed tattoo done, but they never believe me when I tell them Spain. Nobody expects the Spanish ink precision.
- This girl I met on Tinder had a tattoo of a seashell on her innerthigh If you put your ear against it and listened closely, you could smell the sea.
- Yesterday I went to a temporary tattoo parlour to get a tattoo. After it wouldn't wash off this morning I went back to complain, but the tattoo parlour wasn't there.
- Whenever my wife is upset I let her colour in my black and white tattoos. Sometimes she needs a shoulder to crayon.
- My girlfriend got a tattoo of a shell on her thigh Every time I lay my ear on it I can smell the sea.
- Deaf people aren't known to be very rational They have trouble making sound decisions.
- I once met a girl with a tattoo of a conch on her inner thigh When I put my ear to it I could smell the sea
- So you like limericks, huh? On the Breast of a woman named Gale
was tattooed the price of her tail
and on her behind
for the sake of the blind
was the same information in braile. - Whenever my wife is upset Whenever my Wife is upset, I let her color in my black and white tattoos.
Sometimes she just needs a shoulder to crayon.. - My girlfriend got a tattoo of a seashell on her inner thigh… When I hold my ear up to it I can smell the ocean!
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Tattooed One Liners
Which tattooed one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with tattooed? I can suggest the ones about pierced and tattoo artist.
- I think it's pretty cool how the Chinese made a language entirely out of tattoos.
- I got a prison tattoo of mitochondria Now I truly am the powerhouse of the cell
- Got a tattoo of a digital watch on my wrist. I regretted it literally one minute later.
- What do you call a beautiful woman on the arm of a banjo player? A tattoo.
- What do you call a pretty lady on the arm of a drummer? A Tattoo.
- When my kid is upset I let her colour my tattoo! She just needs a shoulder to Crayon
- As a hispanic, my first tattoo was the word Mucho It means a lot to me.
- What does one tat say to the other tat? I am a tattoo
- What do you call a beautiful woman on an accordion player’s arm? A tattoo.
- A friend asked me what my tattoo says. I told him, "It doesn't really talk much."
- What do you say to a bass player with a beautiful women on his arm? Nice tattoo!
- If you get a tattoo of a thermos, Is it now a thermostat?
- I got a tattoo of a gong Because I heard it's cool to get a tattoo of a Chinese cymbal
- My friend decided to get a tattoo of Pi on his face. It was an irrational decision.
- From the moment I saw my wife's abacus tattoo, I knew I could always count on her.
Delightful Fun Tattooed Jokes for a Roaring Good Time
What funny jokes about tattooed you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean drawn jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make tattooed pranks.
A teenager brings her new boyfriend home to meet her parents.
They're disgusted by his haircut, tattoos, and piercings. Later, when he leaves, the girl's mom says, "Dear, he doesn't seem to be a very nice boy."
"Oh, please, mom!" says the daughter. "If he wasn't nice, why would he be doing 500 hours of community service?"
A teenager brings her new boyfriend home to meet her parents.
They're appalled by his haircut, tattoos and piercings.
The boy leaves and the girl's mom remarks, Dear, he doesn't seem to be a very nice boy.
* Oh, come on Mom! If he wasn't nice, would he be doing 300 hours of community service? *
A teenage girl brought her new boyfriend home to meet her parents.
They were appalled by his leather jacket, motorcycle boots, tattoos, and pierced nose. Later, the parents pulled their daughter aside and confessed their concern. "Dear," the mother said, "he doesn't seem very nice."
"Oh please, Mom," the daughter replied. "If he wasn't nice, why would he be doing 200 hours of community service?"
My buddy went to get a tattoo of an Indian on his back...
Half way through he said "Don't forget to put a big tomahawk in his hand."
The tattooist said "Hang on pal, I've only just finished his turban."
When I'm at a bar
I always look for a girl who has a tattoo. I see a tattoo, and I think, here's a girl who's capable of making a decision she'll regret in the future.
I knew a girl with a tattoo of a seashell on her inner thigh
She said if you put your ear up to it, you could smell the ocean.
See? To prove I'm not some boring house dad I went and got a tattoo!
Her: Oh, cool! It's.. uh?
Me: (proudly) It's my thermos! From work!
Her: (reaching towards me) Well, uh, the line work is certainly..
Me: (slaps hand away) Don't touch the thermos tat.
Me and my wife came to an agreement. She would let me get a tattoo if I let her get a breast augmentation
t**... for tat you could say
So my girlfriend got a new tattoo......
Of a seashell located on her inner thigh, and the best part is if you place your ear next to it you can smell the ocean.
Sometimes when people are sad, I let them color in my tattoos.
Sometimes people just need a shoulder to crayon.
First I got a tattoo on my cervical that said "5".
Next, I got one on my thoracic that said "4"
Then, I got one on my lumbar that said "3"
After that, I got one on my Sacrum that said 2"
And now, I'm getting one on my Coccyx that says "1"
It's the spinal countdown.
A teenage girl brings home her boyfriend to meet her parents
Her parents are disgusted by the boyfriend's crazy haircut, excessive tattoos and piercings.
After dinner, the girl's mom tells her, "Honey, he doesn't seem to be a nice boy. Are you sure about this?"
"Oh please mom." the girl begged. "If he wasn't a nice person why would he be doing 500 hours of community service?
My girlfriend has a tattoo of a sea shell on her inner thigh.
When you put your ear on it, you can smell the ocean.
A soccer mom walked into a tattoo parlor and asked for a Christmas tree on her left thigh and a turkey on the right thigh.
When they were done the artist asked why she wanted these tattoos.
She replied, "My husband always complains that there's nothing to eat between Thanksgiving and Christmas."
If I ever start to go bald
I'll get a rabbit tattooed onto my head..
From a distance it would look like a hare
My girlfriend said she was going to get a massive tattoo of a snake on her back.
"Do it," I said. "But it might hurt you."
"I know," she replied. "But it's only a needle."
"No," I said. "I mean being single."
My wife recently got a seashell tattooed on her thigh.
When you put your ear close to it, you can really smell the ocean.
What's the difference between Jesus and Mexicans?
Jesus doesn't have any tattoos of Mexicans.
