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Taking Selfies Jokes

68 taking selfies jokes and hilarious taking selfies puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about taking selfies that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Taking Selfies Short Jokes

Short taking selfies jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The taking selfies humour may include short selfie jokes also.

  1. My girlfriend tried to take a selfie in the shower, but it was too blurry. She has selfie steam issues.
  2. A man died due to his obsession of taking photos of himself next to a boiling kettle He had serious selfie steam issues.
  3. If you find it hard to take pictures of yourself in the sauna... You have selfie-steam issues.
  4. For those people who still carry their selfie stick with them on their travels, I have one thing to say. I hope you take a long hard look at yourself.
  5. My friend is obsessed with taking selfies in the shower, but they always turn out blurry. He has selfie steam issues.
  6. I love taking photos of myself standing next to boiling water. My doctor says I have selfie steam issues.
  7. My Siberian cousin was kidnapped while taking a selfie. In Soviet Russia, pictures take you.
  8. I have a friend who tried to take a selfie in the shower, but the image was too blurry. He has selfie steam issues.
  9. My friend has a habit of taking blurry pictures of himself in the bathroom mirror after taking hot showers... I thunk he has a high selfie steam problem.
  10. My friend is addicted to taking blurry pictures of himself in the shower. He has some serious selfie steam issues.

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Taking Selfies One Liners

Which taking selfies one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with taking selfies? I can suggest the ones about taking a picture and picture day.

  1. What is it called when an orphan takes a selfie ? Family Photo.
  2. What do you call an orphan taking a selfie? Family portrait.
  3. Yo mamma's so fat... that she takes selfies in panorama mode
  4. People who take tons of photos of themselves Have no selfie control
  5. What do you call an orphan taking a selfie? A family photo.
    ..... too much??
  6. What do you call an orphan taking a selfie? Family photo.
  7. People who use Selfie Sticks..... Really need to take a good long look at themselves!
  8. For the New Year, I vow to take a selfie at 720p.m. It's a decent resolution.
  9. To the person who stole my selfie stick: You need to take a long look at yourself.
  10. Why was a midget depressed after taking a picture in front of a geyser? Low selfie-steam
  11. What do you call it when an orphan takes a family photo? A selfie.
  12. I just can't take pictures of myself anymore... I've run out of selfie-steam.
  13. Don't give people who take selfies a hard time they're just trying to save face
  14. When I take selfies, I keep one & delete the other 20. Minutes worth.
  15. If you really think about it... Peter Parker takes selfies for a living.

Cheerful Taking Selfies Jokes for Unforgettable Laughter with Friends!

What funny jokes about taking selfies you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean taking bath jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make taking selfies pranks.

Your momma's so fat, when she takes a selfie she's gotta put her camera on panoramic mode!

Yo momma's so fat she needs a helicopter to take a selfie.

Yo mama is so fat, it takes two texts for her to send a selfie.

If you didn't take a selfie at the gym, were you really there?

I'm just looking for a nice high maintenance girl who uses the dogface on Snapchat, takes tons of selfies, and listens to Taylor Swift.

Neil Armstrong's only regret while he was alive was that he forgot to take a selfie on the moon.

In India a man was bitten by a snake as he tried to take a 'selfie'. How the snake managed to bite the man and hold a phone simultaneously is a mystery.

My grandfather told me this one.

A university professor was taking a trip to the holy land. He had a break in his seminar schedule and was visiting the sea of Galilee.
He saw a sign advertising boat tours, and thought it would be interesting, so he asked the guy with the boats "How much?"
"Six hundred dollars!" Said the man proudly. "All day, up to three passenger and gear!"
"But, um, there's just me, and all I want is a quick row around and a couple of selfies!"
"Still six hundred dollars!" The man shook his head. "Minimum price!"
"That's outrageous." The man said as he walked away. "No wonder Christ walked."

What does cheese say to itself when taking a selfie in the mirror?

Hallooooo me!

how many selfies does it take to get a decent selfie?

depends on the narcissist

Topical Jokes for 2/4

In New York City, police investigated a suspicious package that turned out to be a bag filled with 1,000 condoms. Of the 1,000 condoms found in the bag, only 400 of them had been used.
Speaking of safe s**... — in Venezuela, the price for a pack of condoms has jumped to $755 dollars. And that's just for the expired ones.
Officials determined that a small plane c**... in Colorado was caused by the pilot taking selfies while flying. Poor guy, he just wanted his photos to be in the cloud.

I picked up painting, and I really feel that I was born in the wrong age.

People just don't appreciate my paintings! They're like Matt, can't you just use your camera phone to take a bathroom selfie like everyone else, for christsakes we're at a Starbucks.

How this Amazing Women & Guys were Taking His SelFie Shots

Yo mama is so fat...

She's taking selfies with google earth

What does a lier do at the gym?

Takes selfies.

What's it called when an isis member takes a selfie?

photo b**...

What do you call a fish that takes a selfie?

Selfish

If a midget takes a selfie

Could it be called an elfie?

Did you hear about the geometry teacher who tried to take a selfie?

It was a protracted process but eventually he found the right angle.

What do you call a Samsung 7 user taking a selfie?

A s**... bomber.

Blonde - How do blondes take selfies?

With DSLRs and the lens cap on

A giant pickle walks into a bar..

and everyone in the bar starts wanting to take selfies with him and buy him drinks. Once all the commotion settles, the bartender asks him why everyone was surrounding him to which the pickle replies, "Well, I'm kind of a big dill"

What did the hobbits call the d**... Ents that missed the battle to take selfies?

Abs-Ent

If your name is Richard...

...is every selfie you take a d**...'?

I tried to take selfies the other day

but the model wouldn't work with the photographer

Why did the mathematician take so long to take a selfie?

He couldn't figure out acute angle.

My friend is obsessed with taking blurry pictures of himself in the shower

I guess you could say he has selfie steam issues

The Arizona Wildlife World Zoo refused to euthanize the panther that killed a woman who jumped into its enclosure to take a selfie...

...making it the first black entity to ever successfully invoke the Castle Doctrine/Stand Your Ground against a white entity.