Following is our collection of funny System jokes. There are some system mechanism jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these system nervous system puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Hawaii **IS** the early warning system.
Personally I've got a Sony surround sound system.
They looked at the reviews...
Only 1 star.
Apparently there's a vas deferens
A mechanical engineer, an electrical engineer and a civil engineer are sitting around and talking about God.
The mechanical engineer says, "God is a mechanical engineer. Just look at the human body - a light-weight skeleton with moving parts holding up a massive frame of muscle and fat. God must be a mechanical engineer!"
The electrical engineer disagrees. "No, no. God is an electrical engineer. Just look at the human body - the nerve system routes electrical signals to the brain which is essentially a computer. God must be an electrical engineer!"
The civil engineer disagrees. "No, no. God is a civil engineer. Just look at the human body - only a civil engineer would run a toxic waste pipe through a playground."
Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the possible designers of the human body.
One said, "It was a mechanical engineer. Just look at all the joints."
Another said, "No, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous system has many thousands of electrical connections."
The last said, "Actually it was a civil engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area?"
FAT and 16.
The first says: "God must be a mechanical engineer -- just look at the joints in the human body."
The second says: "God is an electrical engineer -- just look at the nervous system."
The third says: "God has to be a civil engineer -- who else would run a waste disposal pipeline through a perfectly good recreational area?"
No more foreign rulers!
Yes, an alarm system.
I've disconnected my home alarm system and de-registered from the Neighborhood Watch.
I've got two Pakistani flags raised in the front yard, one at each corner, and the black flag of ISIS in the center.
The local police, sheriff, FBI, CIA, NSA, Homeland Security, Secret Service and other agencies are all watching the house 24/7. I've never felt safer and I am saving $49.95 a month.
You can explore system program reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean system fireman system dad jokes. There are also system puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
And they'll invent their own metric system.
They've left those kids a loan.
Because Somalia doesn't have an education system
We have disconnected our home alarm system and quit the candy-ass neighborhood watch. We bought two Pakistani flags on eBay and raised them in the front yard, one at each corner, plus a black flag of ISIS in the center. Now, the local police, sheriff, FBI, CIA, NSA, Homeland Security, Secret Service and other agencies are all watching the house 24/7. I have never felt safer and we're saving $49.99 a month!
Now it doesn't work.
Then I painted my computer white so it would work.
Now the whole system is corrupt.
It's not enough to change the bulb; we have to change the *system*.
She's terrible at keeping your information safe, keeps promising new upgrades but really has been the same OS since 98, and is constantly trying to install herself when you're happy with the system you've been using for the last 8 years.
Inch by inch
If you are over 40, it's no longer called masturbation.
It's called a system check.
Because we'd rather die on our feet than live on your 30.48 centimeters.
In a prison, two inmates are comparing notes. What did they arrest you for? asks the first. Was it a political or common crime? Of course it was political. I'm a plumber. They summoned me to the district Party committee to fix the sewage pipes. I looked and said, 'Hey, the entire system needs to be replaced.' So they gave me seven years.
Wii U, Wii U, Wii U...
Dark matter has the capacity to leave an impact on a system
It's a real 1.61kilometers6.35kilograms for me.
The United States prison system is legalized slavery.
And I said. "Eight"
And he said, "Nope, only 7, after I destroy Uranus tonight."
Gave it one star.
You try fighting off 2 nurses, a doctor and my sons.
Those that use the metric system and those that have put a man on the moon.
In other news, the principal at my school is working with the boys to install a surveillance system to insure privacy in the girls' locker room.
I'd give it one star.
Because they use 9mms at school.
They found trace amounts of Coke in *her system.
*I have to be factually correct.
There would be mass confusion
Those who use the Metric System....
And those who have been to the Moon.
I had to format my NTFS drive to a different file system to support her pictures
Terrible ratings. One star.
Those who use the metric system, and those who have their flag on the moon.
You wouldn't believe how many sub woofers she has.
Those who understand the ternary numeral system,
those who don't,
and those who were expecting this to be a binary joke
Rename Uranus to Ouranus
A man is walking up to a coffee stand to get his daily cup of coffee for $1, when he notices their new special where you can buy three cups for $4.
I'd like a cup of coffee, said the man, handing in a dollar bill.
He realizes he can cheat the system by buying two more cups of coffee, and saving a dollar. I'd like two more cups, please, he said, handing in another $2.
Afterward, he asks the guy in the stand, Why are you selling three cups of coffee for $4 when you could buy three separate cups for $3?
To which the stand dude replied, you could've just bought one cup like you do every day.
1 Star.
he didn't explain why he gave it a one star tho
The judge gave me 40 years, I beat the system
God gave women labor pains and monthly bleeding as the punishment for the original sin. Men's punishment is to be with his wife and listen to her problems. That's why god hates homosexuals. They found a loophole in this system.
The mechanical engineer said, God had to have been a mechanical engineer. Look at the skeleton and how it's designed.
The electrical engineer said, No, no, no. God was an electrical engineer. Look at the nervous system and the way it works.
The civil engineer said, God had to have been a civil engineer. Who else would run a waste disposal pipeline through a great recreational area?
Uranus would be right about where you'd expect it to be.
Sound advice.
because they saw the reviews only had 1 star
Because they can't stand foreign rulers.
They checked our reviews.
One star.
Nowadays you can even find students from various schools in America using 9mm
I for one...
They found traces of Coke in his system.
Didn't think they liked the metric system.
Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the possible designers of the human body. One said, "it was a mechanical engineer. Just look at all the joints." Another said, "no, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous system has many thousands of electrical connections." The last said, "actually it was a civil engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area?"
Single-handedly managed the successful upgrade and deployment of new environmental illumination system with zero cost overruns and zero safety incidents.
They checked the reviews.. only 1 star
Those that use the metric system, and those that have set foot on the moon.
I'm an American. When I was a kid, my Dad told me, "The metric system is gonna be big. Support it and use it - the whole nine yards - every inch of the way."
The voyager space probe hurtling away from our solar system at over 35k mph!
Sent an email to Xi Jinping.
Xi Jinping opened the email and clicked on the attachment.
It was malware and the Party's computer system crashed.
Xi Jinping got on the phone and angrily demanded an answer from His Holiness.
"With attachment, comes suffering", said the Dalai Lama
But that didn't help. So she tried a Playstation - no luck there either. She ended up going through everything from a Sega Master System to a Nintendo Switch, but nothing helped - turns out I was just inconsolable
Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the possible designers of the human body.
One said, "It was a mechanical engineer. Just look at all the joints!"
Another said, "No, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous system has many thousands of electrical connections."
The last one said, "No, actually it had to have been a civil engineer. Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through the recreational area?"
Personally, I love sony sound system with surround sound.
Because if he is, something's gone wrong with the Canadian legal system
One asked the other: Why are you here?
The other answers: Political reasons.
He asks another question: What political reasons?
The other prisoner answers: I am a plumber, and I got called in to the party committee to fix their sink. And they asked what was the problem and I said: "The whole system is rotten, everything must be replaced!"
... Nobody can console him.
* Never make resolutions
* Be accepting of paradoxes
* Use the binary number system more often
(1) Education.
(2) System.
They checked the reviews... but we only had one star
Me: It's my weekend immune system.
because it was the minimum allowed in a 5 star rating system
Shooting starts soon.
The American Healthcare System
Maybe I just have a weekend immune system.
I can't wait to metre
Don't judge me until you've walked 1609 metres in my shoes.
They got the metric system, they wouldn't know what the hell a foot is.
Because they have a strong nervous system.
It keeps getting struck down by the Supreme Quart.
He groaned at both of them.
I said I didn't want to meter.
He said it was a weekend immune system.
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the system system administrator jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working system immune system piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.