Syndrome Jokes

Humoristic puns and funny pick up lines

I read a book about Stockholm Syndrome.

At first I hated it, but by the end I loved it.

Why I won't carpool.

I thought about carpooling with some co-workers to work, but the problem is that on the way to the office we have to go through a tunnel. I'm deathly afraid of this situation. Turns out I have carpool tunnel syndrome.

Just read a book about Stockholm syndrome

It started off badly, but by the end I really liked it.

Doctor: I'm sorry John, but you suffer from Auto Correct Syndrome

John: I didn't even know I was I'll

I was reading a book about Stockholm Syndrome the other day.

It was really bad to begin with, but by the end I quite liked it.

I filled out a job application last week...

... and under disabilities I put narcolepsy and Tourette's syndrome.
So not only will I be able to sleep at work, but if someone tries to wake me up I can tell them to fuck off.

I read a book about Stockholm syndrome recently...

I didn't like it at first, but by the end I loved it

Cr

Doctor: I'm afraid you're suffering from Auto Correct Syndrome

Patient: I didn't even know I was I'll

A man goes to his doctor

"Doc, you gotta help me. I can't stop singing What's New Pussycat."
"Oh, that sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome," said the doctor.
"Tom Jones Syndrome? Is that rare?"
"It's not unusual."

What do you call a high person with Downs Syndrome?

A baked potato.

I've just read a book about Stockholm Syndrome.

The first couple of chapters were awful, but by the end I loved it

A guy goes to the doctor.

A guy goes to the doctor.

"Doc, I can't stop singing 'The green, green grass of home.'"

"That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome."

"Is it common?"

"It's not unusual."

Tom Jones Syndrome

A woman goes to a doctor's office to get results back from a test she took a few weeks ago. The doctor sits her down and tells her "You have TJS, Tom Jones Syndrome." The woman, scared, asks "Is it rare?" and the doctor replies "It's not unusual"

I just read a book on Stockholm Syndrome. The first couple of chapters were terrible, but by the end I loved it!

Albert Einstein owed the inspiration for one of his best ideas to his cousin who had Down Syndrome...

he had a special relative, you see?

Man goes to the doctor.

Man: "Doc, you gotta help me. I sing spontaneously, and uncontrollably."

Doctor: what do you mean?

Man: Well whenever I see a woman on the street I start singing "She's a lady". And Any time I cross paths with a cat I'll sing "What's new pussy cat?".

Doctor : What you have is Tom Jones syndrome.

Man: So you've heard of this before?

Doctor: It's not unusual.

Guys get PMS too...

Post Masturbation Syndrome. It's the 15 minutes after masturbating where you question what life is and what you just did.

I read a book about stockholm syndrome...

I hated it at first, but it was great after a while.

What do you call a stoner with down syndrome?

A baked potato.

I named my dog Syndrome..

So when he's Misbehaving I yell "Down Syndrome"

^^^Stolen

When a musician's fingers move really fast across a piano, they're considered a prodigy and a genius.

But when i go even faster on full-screen rhythm games on my iPad, I'm "lazy", "going to get carpal tunnel syndrome", "unproductive", and "ruining the funeral, Emily".

A guy goes to see his doctor...

He says to his doctor:

>Man: "Doctor, I can't get that song "She's a Lady" out of my head... I keep singing it over and over, but it just won't go away...."


>Doctor: "Hmmm.... sounds like a case of Tom Jones Syndrome."


>Man: "Oh no.... Is it serious?"


>Doctor: "Well, it's not unusual."

"Tom Jones Syndrome"

A man is in the waiting room at his Doctor's office and finally, the Doc arrives.

"Hello Jim what seems to be the problem today?"

Jim replies "Doc, you've gotta help me. I can't stop singing 'She's a Lady' by Tom Jones!"

The Doc says "oh yes, that is 'Tom Jones Syndrome'"

"Is it common?" Jim asks

"Well it's not unusual"


First post.

My wife went to the doctor yesterday and was diagnosed with the broken-vacuum-cleaner syndrome

It means that they make a ton of noise and don't suck anymore.

I joined a forum for people with Down syndrome.

Comments are disabled.

Why is Pre-Menstrual Syndrome called Pre-Menstrual Syndrome?

Mad Cow Disease was already taken

The other day, my friend said that he thinks that I might have Asperger's Syndrome.

I couldn't tell if he was joking, or being serious, or happy, or sad, or angry, or frightened, or...

" doctor I can't stop singing What's New Pussycat."

" I think you might have Tom Jones syndrome."
" is it rare?" " it's not unusual."

I saw a guy with down syndrome buying a pair of jeans today.

I thought to myself, "What a greedy bastard, haven't you got enough already?"

Just finished a book about the Stockholm Syndrome

I did not like it to start with but ended up really liking it

Just finished reading a book about Stockholm syndrome.

It was pretty bad at the start but by the end I liked it.

Mental health hotline.

Hello, welcome to the mental health hotline.

If you have obsessive compulsive disorder, press 1 repeatedly.

If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.

If you have multiple personality syndrome, press 3, 4, 5, and 6.

If you suffer from paranoid schizophrenia, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call.

If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be transfered to the mothership.

If you are hearing voices, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you which number to press.

If you are manic depressive, it doesn't matter which button you press. No one will answer anyway.

If you are dyslexic, press 96969696969696.

If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the pound button until a representative comes on the line.

If you have amnesia, press 8 and state your name, address, phone number, date of birth, social security number, and your mother's and grandmother's maiden names.

If you have post traumatic stress disorder, slowly and carefully press 911.

If you have bi-polar disorder, please leave a message after the beep. Or before the beep. Or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.

If you have short term memory loss, please try you call again in a few minutes.

If you have low self esteem, please hang up. All our representatives are busy.

At a Down Syndrome disco...

...Do you think they have a slow dance?

I have Down's Syndrome

47/46, would not recommend

what is the disease that killed princes diana?

Car pole tunnel syndrome

What do you call a wolf with Stockholm Syndrome?

A Dog.

What do you call a Russian with Tourette's syndrome?

Yukanol Fukov

A man goes to the doctor's office...

He tells the doctor "It's the strangest thing. Every time I see a cat, I can't help singing "What's new pussycat, woah-oh-oh".

The doctor says "I've heard of this before! It's called 'Tom Jones Syndrome'"

"Tom Jones Syndrome?" The man asks. "Is it common?"

"It's not unusual"

When I get a dog I am going to name it syndrome

Because when he jumps up on me I can shout "Down syndrome"

Bill can't get the song "What's New, Pussycat?" out of his head.

Bill goes to the doctor, and says "Doctor, doctor, you've gotta help me! I can't get the song "What's New, Pussycat?" out of my head."

Doctor says "Well, that's not really a medical condition, is it?"

Bill says "You don't understand, it's been in my head for three or four months, constantly, morning to night, I can't work, I can't concentrate, it's affecting my relationships, my career, it's ruining my life"

"Ah," the doctor says, "sounds like you have Tom Jones Syndrome."

"Tom Jones Syndrome?" Bill asks. "I've never heard of that, is it rare?"

"Oh," the doc replies, "it's not unusual."

I recently read a book about Stockholm Syndrome

It was terrible at first, but I liked it by the end.

My wrists hurt whenever I drive to work with my co-workers and we go through a tunnel.

I think it's carpool tunnel syndrome.

I'm writing a book about my time growing up as a shy young boy with irritable bowel syndrome...

... i've decided to call it 'Diarrhoea Of A Wimpy Kid'

I'm organising an charity...

...event in my town next weekend , we're gonna be in the Community Centre from 1 - 5 pm. There's gonna be a raffle & guest speaker & all the proceeds are in the name of erectile/ ejaculation dysfunction syndrome.


So please let me know if you cant come.

What do you say to a handicapped dog?

Down Syndrome, down!

A man tells his shrink he's no longer attracted to his wife.

"For some reason I'm only aroused by small pieces of fruit."

"I've seen this before, you have Twin Syndrome.," the doc replies.

"Twin Syndrome?"

"You only come in pears."

What do you call a midget with Down Syndrome?

you call him a little slow

What does a person obsessed with IKEA suffer from?

Stock-home Syndrome

A guy goes to see his doctor...

He says, "Doctor, I can't stop singing the Green Green Grass of Home."

The Doctor says, "Hmmm, it sounds to me like a case of Tom Jones Syndrome."

"Tom Jones Syndrome, is that common?"

"It's not unusual."

Q: What do you call a Russian with Tourette's Syndrome?

A: Yukanol Fukov.

^^I ^^got ^^banned ^^from ^^a ^^sub ^^for ^^this ^^one. ^^:)

A football team should setup a charity that gives presents to children with Down Syndrome

...and call it Touch Downs.

At first I thought my therapy for Stockholm syndrome was useless

But now I kind of like it.

Why don't kids with Down's Syndrome do drugs?

Because they're already high on Chromosomes.

When i first heard what Stockholm Syndrome was i didn't like it

but then it started to grow on me

People in Sweden keep telling me how great it is living there...

But I think it's just Stockholm Syndrome.

I have a dog named Syndrome.

But it gets kinda awkward when he jumps on someone and I have to shout out, DOWN SYNDROME!

I can't help but pronounce A, E, I, O, and U very aggressivley.

I think I have irrititable vowel syndrome.

Tomorrow is Downs Syndrome Awareness Day

You're supposed to wear crazy socks.

I'm just going to wear extra jeans.

I want to get a dog and name it Syndrome.

So that every time he gets on my couch, I can yell "DOWN SYNDROME"

Took my wife to therapy to fix her Tourette's syndrome

Waste of money that was. Turns out I **am** a c*nt and she **does** want me to f*ck off..!

A woman goes to the doctor due to some distressing symptoms.

She tells him she can't stop dancing and crooning ballads.

Ma'am, you have Tom Jones syndrome he says.

Oh no! Is it rare? She asks.

Well, it's not unusual....

I just read a book on Stockholm Syndrome...

At first it was pretty bad, but by the end I kinda liked it.

What's the difference between having a badly poured draft beer and having a child with Down's Syndrome?

If the head's too big on your beer, you can blow it off.

I can't stop shitting out feathers.

I think I've got Irritable owl syndrome.

What do you call a kid with down syndrome when he's high?

A baked potato.[](/changeling)

I just read a book about Stockholm Syndrome.

I mean it was pretty bad at first, but by the end I started liking it!

So my cousin has bieber fever...

Or as it's medically known, Down Syndrome.

What is nine inches long and keeps a woman up screaming all night?

Sudden Infant Death Syndrome

Teenage twin boys in a "special needs" class were suspended for online gambling while at school...

Turns out they have DoubleDown syndrome.

My Doctor just diagnosed me with Tom Jones Syndrome...

"Is it common?" I said.

"Well..." He replied

"It's not unusual"

I'm reading a book about sufferers of tourettes syndrome...

I want to know what makes them tic.

I once went to a convention about impostor syndrome...

...but I had to leave because I felt like I didn't belong

I thought my wife had Tourette Syndrome.

Turns out I am a cunt and she does want me to fuck off.

When I get a dog, I'm going to call him Syndrome.

Down Syndrome!

A man with Down syndrome walks in to a bar

The barman says ' hey! Why the Mong face?'

They say good things come in threes...

Try telling that to someone with
Down Syndrome

What do you call a kid with Down Syndrome who's late to school?

Retardy

Your best offensive one-liners. GO!

Or just short jokes

Have you ever seen an Asian person with Down Syndrome? But then again, how could you tell?

What do we want? An end to tourette's syndrome.....

When do we want it? Cunt!

Teenage boys will masturbate to anything.

That's why I know so much about toxic shock syndrome.

I hate driving through tunnels [OC]

They're always so dark and scary. My hands always start shaking whenever I'm driving through one with my mates.

I think I have carpool tunnel syndrome

What are the funniest syndrome jokes of all time?

Did you ever wanted to stand out with a good sense of humour joking about Syndrome? Well, here are the best Syndrome puns to laugh out loud. Crazy and funny Syndrome pick up lines to share with friends.

Joko Jokes