Sweeping Jokes
58 sweeping jokes and hilarious sweeping puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about sweeping that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Have you ever heard the expression "Take it with a sweep of the brush?" Discover why sweeping jokes appear in the funniest situations. From leaky dustpans to street sweeping, this profound collection of jokes will have you laughing until the dirt is done.
Funniest Sweeping Short Jokes
Short sweeping jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The sweeping humour may include short breathtaking jokes also.
- A wife walks in on her husband playing on his PlayStation. "The house is still filthy! I thought I asked you to sweep the house!" she says.
"I did" replied the husband, "I found no hostiles" - but I have a PhD... "Here's a broom go and sweep the floors."
"But I have a phd..."
"Oh sorry, give me the broom, I'll show you how its done." - I saw on the news that ignorance and apathy are sweeping the country I didn't know that, but I don't really care.
- I'm opening a new chimney sweep, soldering supplies, and dessert business. It's called Flue, Flux, Flan.
- The janitor had trouble with his broom After days of frustration he went to his boss and demanded sweeping reforms
- Everyone in Britain prefers brushes over vacuum cleaners when it comes to tidying their floors. Sorry if that's a sweeping generalisation.
- Did you guys hear about the new board game sweeping the Iberian peninsula? Settlers of Catalan.
- Romania won 4 Olympic medals this year in Tokyo. 3 of them are from either sweep or sculling. They must have a high degree of row mania over there.
- A guy's wife was spending a lot of time with the janitor, turns out his suspicions were correct. He was sweeping with his wife.
- My friend doesn't like to talk about her dry skin… She'd rather just sweep it under the carpet
Share These Sweeping Jokes With Friends
Sweeping One Liners
Which sweeping one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with sweeping? I can suggest the ones about broad and extensive.
- I don't mean to make sweeping generalizations but all brooms are pretty much the same.
- A new type of broom has just been released, It is sweeping the nation.
- Just helped a cop sweep up some broken glass. That was my first brush with the law.
- Just sorted out the work rota for the zoo. The lion sweeps tonight.
- I just watched my friend sweep a woman off her feet. He's a really aggressive janitor.
- Where do janitors go at night? They go to sweep.
- When don't you disturb a broom When it's sweeping.
- What did the mommy broom say to the baby broom? Time to go to sweep.
- I just quit my job sweeping up in a glitter factory It was pretty rubbish.
- The Grim Reaper and I used to share sweeping duties. I had a brush with Death.
- Have you heard of the movie about the broom? It's sweeping the nation.
- Why did the janitor file for a divorce? He found his wife sweeping with someone else.
- The cleaning lady refused to mop or sweep "Floors are beneath me" she explained.
- Cleaning ladies: The new craze that's sweeping the nation
- If you sweep the floor with roommates... you are broommates
Street Sweeping Jokes
Here is a list of funny street sweeping jokes and even better street sweeping puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- As Jeff the street sweeper says "A clean place is not where one sweeps, but where one doesn't litter" That's why he traded in his broom for a shotgun.
Sweeping Jokes to Giggle and Enjoy A Night of Unforgettable Laughter
What funny jokes about sweeping you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean spectacular jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make sweeping pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Ladies, stop looking for a guy to sweep you off your feet.
Sweeping is your job.
A new craze sweeps an Eastern European nation
Though Transylvania is mostly rivers and mountains, a new outdoor sport is achieving newfound popularity. Folks have been flocking to the calmer parts of the Olt and Danube to try out for a crew, the competitive paddling fad usually found in lakes. In fact, the sport has spread from the region to the whole country.
Truly, the nation has Ro-mania.
A Jewish grandmother is walking on the beach with her grandson...
Suddenly, a rogue wave comes in and sweeps the grandson out to sea. Distraught, the grandmother looks to the sky and says, "Oh god, i have always been true and faithful to you. Please bring my grandson back." And with that, another wave comes in and deposits the grandson safely on the shore. The grandmother once again looks to the sky and says, "He had a hat."
Netflix the clairvoyant!
Donald Trump is raking in the votes and winning primaries like we haven't seen since 2008 when Obama started his sweep of the nation.
Which proves that Netflix was right all along...
Orange is the new Black.
Here's one for you recent graduates.
A college grad decides to get a job at a hardware store for the summer. He shows up on his first day of work and his boss hands him a broom.
"Here, your first task is to sweep out all the aisles. After that, I'll show you where the rest of the cleaning supplies are."
The grad looks at the broom and says to his boss, "I don't think you understand, I'm a college graduate."
His boss replies, "Oh, no problem. I can show you how to use a broom."
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
What's the benefit of having a s**... broom?
They tend to sweep around.
It's pretty easy to fall in love with an Olympic Curler
They're used to sweeping people off their feet
Olympic curling seems like the kind of game...
Mr. Miyagi would have invented to trick Daniel into sweeping his floors.
I had a job interview today, so I started with some sweeping, after which I displayed my twirling, then a little peek-a-boo, and I finished with a most vigorous flapping
I don't think they were impressed with my cape abilities.
I put my name into a drawing in order to win a tiny broom used to clean beef.
I hope I win this sweep steaks
A man was at the checkout to buy a broom for his house.
He goes up to the cashier and asks if the broom he has is the best one they have. The cashier responds "im not sure i mean a broom is a broom". The man replies "whoa lets not make any sweeping generalizations here"
Why should you vote a janitor into public office?
If you want them to make sweeping changes.
I have this weird problem where I can't understand metaphors, unless they are also ladder-related puns.
My psychologist keeps is trying to find some Holy Rail of a solution, but I'm pretty content to continue to sweep it under the rung.
A wave of crime is sweeping Metropolis. Superman is helpless to stop the instigator, a code-breaking enthusiast dressed in full plate armour.
Can no one save us from the Crypto-Knight?
One broom said to the other...
'New brooms are always better than old ones.'
'Wow, that's a sweeping statement.' the other broom replied.
It's not right to assume that a janitor can clean your chimney.
You shouldn't make sweeping generalizations.
You know that satisfaction you feel after sweeping when you have a big pile of dirt and know it was worth it?
I love when that same feeling when you wash your hands after taking a dump
The boss approaches the new employee...
...and tells him to sweep the office.
"I'm sorry but I went to Harvard" the employee replies
The boss responds "Oh, my bad. In this case I have to show you how to do this"
When your canals don't work like they used to before, And I can't sweep past by your fleet, Will your cargo still remember the haste that I drove? Will your passage be blocked up for weeks?
'Cause, honey, your hull will always go slow, it's evergreen.
\~Capt. Ed Sheeran
