The Best 37 Swede Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Swede jokes. There are some swede isreali jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these swede translator puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Swede Jokes and Puns

What do you get when hou bring a Greek and a Swede together?


Whaat do you get when you cross a Swede and a Norwegian?

A socialist who wants to be king!

Why does sweden have so many somalis?

They have a pirate bay......

Swede joke, Why does sweden have so many somalis?

A man is taking a walk in a park.

He sees another man sitting on a bench holding a long pole. He walks up to the man and asks, "Excuse me, are you a polevaulter?" The man replies, "No, I'm a Swede, but how did you know my name was Walter?"

Three guys see a European man stretching across a lawn...

The First says: "That guy looks like Swede."

The Second says: "No no no, he is definitely Italian."

The Third says: "C'mon guys! He's definitely a SpanYard!"

I'll see myself out.

Two cannibals are having a chat...

"I've become a vegetarian you know."

"But I just saw you eat that man!"

"He was a Swede"

What did the Scandinavian say at his Grandmothers funeral?

She was a Swede old lady but now shes Finnish

Swede joke, What did the Scandinavian say at his Grandmothers funeral?

How do you describe a Swede, who's not really a Swede?


Norwegian History

The toilet seat was invented by a Swede in Minnesota, but twenty years later a North Dakota Norwegian invented the hole in it.

In Sweden paternity leave is a big thing. And it is very challenging, almost every father loses 23lb in the first few weeks.

They have no idea where the baby is.

An Englishman, Scottishman, Irishman, Welshman, Frenchman, Russian, Spaniard, Mexican, American, Norweigan, Swede, Albanian, Italian, Indian, Moroccan, Dutchman, Brazilian, Kenyan, Australian and Belgian walk into a bar.

The barman says; "You can't come in here without a Thai."

You can explore swede turk reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean swede stockholm dad jokes. There are also swede puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

Whats the first word a swede says after its born?

wouaaa wouaaa wu wu welcome refugees

Why can't Sweden win a race?

Because, it always sits right behind the Finnish line

Sweden runs out of trash to recycle...

... Where's PewDiePie when you need him.

What did the Sweden attacker say before he got in the car?

Islam my truck into you.

I went to Sweden to look for some Oxo Cubes.

I hear they have a really good shop there called "Stockhome".

Swede joke, I went to Sweden to look for some Oxo Cubes.

A Swede, a Norwegian and a Finn

A Swede, a Norwegian and a Finn tried to swim from Norway to America on a dare. Ten miles from the Norwegian coast, the Swede gasped "I can't make it..." and promptly drowned. Fifty miles from the Norwegian coast, the Norwegian gasped "I can't make it..." and promptly drowned. The Finn had just caught sight of the American coast, when he sighed "I can't make it either..." and promptly swam back to Norway.

How do you trap a Swede in the bathroom?

On the left wall write: look right.

On the right wall write: look left.

A swede is looking to buy some deodorant

He goes into the store and is asked would you like ball or aerosol?
Taken aback he replies I would like armpit..

Do you know why so many swedes believe in reincarnation?

Because they are going to be Bjorn again.

When Sweden play Denmark in the World Cup the scoreboard will show SWE DEN...

I wonder what happens when Nigeria play Germany?

Sweden should remake the Bourne Identity Films and call them The Bjorn Identity

What do you call a swede with war medals?

A thief.

A Swede and a Finn meet for a drink.

The Swede arrives and sits down at the table.
'Hello' says the Swede.
'Are we here to talk or drink?' asks the Finn

I'd like to go to Sweden

But I can't a-fjord it.

What do you call a Swede that doesn't like modern music?

Bjorn in the wrong generation.

Did you hear about the time Snoop Dogg moved to Sweden and learned the local language?

He spoke swede every day.

What's the difference between a Swede, an American, and a Korean?

Ask them to pronounce and define
Bae .

The Swedes discovered the space:

IKEA is now I K E A

Why do you never meet an ugly Swede?

Cause the Vikings didn't take the ugly ones.

Just bought๏ปฟ๏ปฟ๏ปฟ a Volvo from Neil Diamond on eBay.....

Swede car online๏ปฟ๏ปฟ

I've just seen a man in the local bookstore exchange a swede like vegetable for some hardbacks

I thought, that's a turnip for the books

An Englishman, and Irishman...

, a Chinese, a Japanese, a Scot, a Mexican, an, African, a Portuguese, a Swede, a German, and a Frenchman walk into a bar.
I'm sorry, says the maรฎtre'D, But you can't come in here without a Thai.

I bought a volvo from Neil Diamond on eBay...

Swede car online!

I bought a used Volvo from Neil Diamond on Autotrader....

Swede car online.

In Sweden the CEO of IKEA was just elected president.

He should have his cabinet together by the end of the week.

How many Swedish people does it take to make a cake?

Depends on how Swede you want it to be

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the swede icelander jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working swede american piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes