The Best 25 Swamp Jokes
Following is our collection of funny Swamp jokes. There are some swamp river jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.
Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these swamp nile puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.
Top 10 of the Funniest Swamp Jokes and Puns
So a rich Blonde is...
Flying over the Everglades when her private jet has a malfunction and crashes.
Having survived the crash she graps her designer bag, puts on her $1000 shoes and stumbles over to the exit where the captain is opening the door.
taking one look over the wild swamp outside she first looks desidedly unhappy but to the captains surprise she then lightens up, turns to him and smiles.
"Oh, Well. at least they got rescue boats from LaCoste"
What did one southern swamp day to the other southern swamp?
I'M BAYOUUUU
How do you put an elephant in a fridge joke
A plane carries 500 bricks. 1 falls out. How many bricks are left?
499.
How do you put an elephant in a fridge in 3 steps?
Open the fridge, put in the elephant, and close the fridge.
How do you put a deer in a fridge in 4 steps?
Open the fridge, take out the elephant, put in the deer, then close the fridge.
The Lion King is having a party. All the animals are there except for one; who is it?
The deer: He is still in the fridge.
An old lady is crossing a swamp, but it is a crocodile swamp. How does she cross? Normally, all the crocodiles are at the Lion King's party
Mary dies at the edge of the swamp. How?
A brick falls from the sky and kills her.
Knock knock Who's there?
Not Mary
What is it about tall creepy louisiana swamp dwellers that makes them naturally glow?
Their bayou loomin' essence
To drown in a swamp would be a quite symmetrical way to kick the bucket ...
Your life began when you were pushed out of a slimy hole, now it ends while you're getting sucked into one.
Donald Trump's plan for the first 100 days is going exactly according to plan...
Now that he's finished building the swamp he can focus on draining the wall.
Two alligators were murdered overnight in the swamp
Looks like we need an investagator to find out the culprit.
I was stranded in the swamp for days with no food
I had no choice but to hunt down large white birds and eat them. Through the whole ordeal, I found myself filled with egret.
The news out of Washington has me feeling like Shrek.
I miss the good old days when all we had was a swamp.
Trump is doing what he promised, draining the swamp.
You can't build a bigger swamp until you drain the old one
What's the most effective way to drain a swamp?
Pour toxic orange sludge into it and the community will mobilize to drain it for you.
You can explore swamp weathermen reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean swamp gatoraids dad jokes. There are also swamp puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.
I'm going to compete in the annual Swamp Half-Marathon.
Just want to run that bayou.
WHAT DO YOU CALL A PRIVATE DETECTIVE THAT ONLY WORKS IN THE SWAMP?
An investiGATOR!
Donald Trump is draining the swamp. He has already fired Tillerson, Shulkin, Bannon, Scaramucci, Priebus
What Bigly courage our President has
Ever hear about Dutch Shrek?
He doesn't care if you are in his swamp.
How to tell what part of Washington you're in: Forest is west, desert is east...
Swamp is DC.
What do you call a reptile lawyer who lives in the swamp?
Alitigator.
Why is a bad Spanish swamp kind of sweet?
Because it's a marsh malo.
NSFW what happens when you have sex in a swamp?
You get gatoraids
What do you call a rectangle that lives in a swamp
A shrektangle
Crocodiles can't put their tongues out
So if you are being taunted in a swamp, It probably is an alligator.
What do you get when you call the swamp?
a crocodile tone
What do you call a woman with no arms and no legs in a swamp?
Marsha.
What do you get when you push a female mathematician into a swamp?
Algae bra
A young blonde, on vacation in Louisiana, wanted a pair of alligator shoes...
but was reluctant to pay high New Orleans prices.
She stomped out of the store and headed for the swamp.
Later, as the shopkeeper drove home, he spotted the blonde standing waist-deep in a bayou, shotgun in hand, with a huge alligator closing in.
She took aim and shot the creature between the eyes.
The shopkeeper watched in amazement as she struggled to haul the carcass onto an embankment where several other dead alligators were lined up.
Oh, no! the blonde shouted in dismay.
This one isn't wearing any shoes either!
Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the swamp lioness jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.
We suggest to use only working swamp upstream piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.