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Sushi Jokes

85 sushi jokes and hilarious sushi puns to laugh out loud. Read food jokes about sushi that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Laugh out loud with these corny sushi jokes! From miso soup to soba noodles and raw fish, these hilarious jokes will have you rolling. Read on for the best sushi related puns and jokes!

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Funniest Sushi Short Jokes

Short sushi jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The sushi humour may include short seafood jokes also.

  1. Went out for sushi last night And a guy spilled a whole bottle of soy sauce on himself. Everyone laughed except me. Don't Kikkoman when he's down
  2. What did the dumpling say to the sushi? “You’re a raw deal, but I’m the real ‘dill’!”
  3. You meet your date at a sushi bar My daughter told me a joke she made up when you meet your date at a sushi bar you say wasssaabay
  4. Sushi too bright My friend bought a sushi lamp for his room, it's too bright, how does he make it dim some?
  5. What's the Preferred Luxury Automobile of Sushi Chefs around the world? Rolls Rice
  6. Why don't blind people eat sushi? Because they can't seafood
  7. Did you hear Sushi Restaurants are about to release a new type of roll? It is the lady gaga Roll, and it is served Raw, Raw, Raw, Raw, Raw, Raw
  8. What did the sushi say to the bee? Wasaaabeee
  9. What did the Japanese chef say to his son when he brought back his girlfriend? Sushi's the one?
  10. I asked my Japanese girlfriend to make me a traditional dish tasty enough to make me fall in love with her national cuisine. Sushi did.

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Sushi One Liners

Which sushi one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with sushi? I can suggest the ones about salmon and japanese food.

  1. What did the sushi say to the bee? Wasabi
    I'll let myself out now.
  2. Is that a sushi roll in your pocket? Or are you just happy sashimi?
  3. My girlfriend hated my obsession with Japanese food Sushi left me.
  4. What did Sushi A say to Sushi B WASSABI
  5. What's a straight-A student's favorite type of sushi? The Honor Roll.
  6. I asked my girlfriend to buy me some Japanese food. ... sushi did.
  7. How does Lady Gaga like her sushi? Raw, raw, raw, raw, raw!
  8. What is the sushi chef's dream car? rolls rice
  9. What did Sushi A say to Sushi B? Wasabi!! (Whats up B)
  10. What did the sushi say to the bee? Wasabi
  11. My wife hated my obsession with Asian cuisine... Sushi left me.
  12. What kind of car does a sushi chef drive? Rolls Rice
  13. What did the sushi say to the bumblebee? Wassssaaa-bee?
  14. What kind of cars do sushi chefs drive? Rolls rice!
  15. A cannibal wanted some sushi So he bought a pack of ra-men

Sushi Rolls Jokes

Here is a list of funny sushi rolls jokes and even better sushi rolls puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Sushi ...the rolls-rice of Asian seafood
  • What type of sushi does Bob Seger like? That Old Thai moroccan Roll.
  • What did Sushie A say to Sushi B? Wasa-B! Let's roll.
  • I asked my Sushi Chef what his favorite roll was. . he said payroll.
  • A man sold his flesh to a cannibalistic sushi shop... ...I guess you could say he's on a roll.
  • What do you call weaponized sushi? A combat roll
  • My sushi preparation class had a kleptomanniac as a substitute teacher She took roll
  • Why did the sushi roll make first chair in the orchestra? Because she tuna.
  • What did the sushi say to the other fish about his luck? I'm on a roll!
  • What did the sushi roll say to the sushi chef? Wa-sa-bi?

Sushi Restaurants Jokes

Here is a list of funny sushi restaurants jokes and even better sushi restaurants puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • At the sushi restaurant: What kind of eel is this? Diner at the sushi restaurant: "What kind of eel is this?"
    Waiter: "Do you love it?"
    Diner: "yeah"
    Waiter: "Then, that's a moray"
  • What did the fish say for stinking up the sushi restaurant? I am saury.
  • Couple beside me in restaurant are on a blind date; they both love dogs, sushi, and looking at Tinder while the other one is in the restroom.
  • What is the name of the restaurant chain that serves sushi burritos? Japotle.
  • What did Arnold say when the sushi restaurant messed up his order? It's not a tuna.
Sushi joke, What did Arnold say when the sushi restaurant messed up his order?

Bad Sushi Jokes

Here is a list of funny bad sushi jokes and even better bad sushi puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What do you do when a woman serves you bad sushi? Sue she
Sushi joke, What do you do when a woman serves you bad sushi?

The Funniest Sushi Jokes for a Bone-Shaking Laugh

What funny jokes about sushi you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean shrimp jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make sushi pranks.

A Mexican, American and Japanese man are standing on the top of the world's tallest building...

They are told to throw off something their country has a lot of.
The Japanese man goes first: he throws off sushi.
The Mexican then proceeds to throw off tacos.
And then the American pushes the Mexican off.

You should never use French Haddock in sushi

You'll get food poissoning.

My friend said to me, "Whenever a World Cup game is on, let's eat something to do with that team for dinner that night."

Mexico was on, we had burritos.
Japan was on, we had sushi.
USA was on, we had burgers.
Italy was on, we had pizza.
Tuesday is England, so we're going out.

At what age did the world's greatest sushi chef begin his training?

Tuna half.

"This sushi is terrible."

"Sir, this is an aquarium."

What is a cucumber and a dolphin doing in the same room?

Sushi

What Did The Sushi Say To The Bee?

Wassup bee

Hear about the new sushi bar that caters exclusively to lawyers?

It's called Sosumi

My girlfriend told me that if I took her to get sushi, I didn't have to use a c**... after.

She's getting the raw end of that deal!

f**... Plans

When I die, I want to be cremated and my ashes scattered in the sea.
So when my family eats sushi they'll think of me.

Have you tried the whale sushi?

It's Killer

A Sunni and a Shia Muslim have a child together

They name her Sushi

My dad is from India and my mom is from Japan

So I get my sushi from 7/11

I ate so much sushi today

My mercury levels were so high I knew the waiter's temperature when he brought the check.

A man goes up to the counter to order a Polish sausage.

The cashier asks, Hey, are you polish?
The man then responds, You think I'm polish just because I ordered a Polish sausage? If I ordered a wiener schnitzel would you think I'm German? If I ordered sushi would you think I'm Japanese? If I ordered Pizza would you think I'm Italian?
The cashier responds, No, it's just that this is s hardware store.

What do sushi makers have in common with Spanish pirates?

They both seek fortuna.

What did Sushi A day to Sushi B?

WASABI

What's the best pan to make sushi in?

Japan.

What's Lady Gaga's favorite food?

Sushi because they serve it raw, raw, raw\-raw\-raw!
(sorry I just saw the guy get to the front page with his s**... asparagus joke, so I wanted to try mine).

Germany decides that if they win the cup they would give out free beer for a year. Japan decides that if they win they would give out free sushi for a year.

Let's go Colombiaaaaaa!!!

Drove by a new s**... club earlier that serves sushi

It was called Bento-ver.

Financial collapse in Japan

Origami Bank has folded.
Sumo Bank has gone belly up.
Bonsai Bank has had to cut back some of its branches.
Karaoke Bank has been put up for sale and is going for a song.
There's something fishy going on at Sushi Bank...shareholders are afraid they might get a raw deal.
Kamikaze Bank shares have nose-dived.
500 jobs at Karate Bank have been chopped.

A group of tourists were enjoying sushi at a restaurant in Japan.

Having never eaten sushi before, one woman asked the chef if he would suggest the best way of eating it.
He nodded, and replied Let me shoyu.

What did the sushi say to its fiance?

You make miso happy.

Not even sushi is safe.

Wife and I were having sushi, she ordered a rainbow roll and asked if I wanted piece
I told her I would have the piece on the end... Just for the Halibut.

I was impressed at how well she controlled the impulse to stab me with the chop sticks.

Hey when was the last time we had sushi?

I think it was a long tamago.

(from my 10yo twins)

How do you cheer for sushi?

Raw! Raw! Raw!

Sushi joke, What kind of car does a sushi chef drive?

jokes about sushi