Surrender Jokes
61 surrender jokes and hilarious surrender puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about surrender that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Are you looking for a humorous anecdote about when the French Army surrendered during Neuf? Read the article “Surrender Jokes” and explore the comedic accounts of when the French Army was blown apart. Get a good laugh today and instantly become an expert on the events of Neuf!
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Funniest Surrender Short Jokes
Short surrender jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The surrender humour may include short sacrifice jokes also.
- If France and Italy go to war, who would win? None of them, France would surrender and Italy would switch sides.
- France and Italy simultaneously declare war on each other France surrenders
Italy changes sides
Both lose - Civil War spoilers Lee surrenders at Appomatox Courthouse, Abe Lincoln is shot by John Wilkes Booth.
- Why do the french hate League of Legends? They have to wait 20 minutes before surrendering
- When I was in high school, I was part of the French club. We didn't really do anything, but every once in a while, we'd surrender to the German club.
- What does every frenchmen learn in first grade of school? (sorry France) How to surrender in 6 different languages.
- Putin: There's a lot less Ukrainian soldiers surrendering than I expected. Putin's stooge: It's fewer, Mr. President.
Putin: Don't call me that. Yet. - You got to admit these civil war reenactments are getting more efficient Nowadays it only takes a couple hours for the confederacy to surrender
- Does anyone know where I can find the "Surrender" Emoji? Nevermind the French flag works fine. 🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷
- In 1991, a country banned expressions of surrender, acceptance, or agreement. That marked the fall of the "So be it" Union.
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Surrender One Liners
Which surrender one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with surrender? I can suggest the ones about retreat and acceptance.
- Why do Russians wear white armbands so they have something to wave when they surrender
- Which element is most likely to surrender an electron? Francium.
- Napoleon was the best general the french ever had. He managed to surrender twice.
- I entered the "How not to surrender" competition and I won hands down.
- North Korea threatens to start nuclear war France surrenders just in case
- White Nationalist should honor the true legacy Robert E. Lee And surrender.
- What French city always surrenders first? Toulouse
- Why does the French army surrender so quickly? They have nothing Toulouse.
- Believe it or not i can actually speak fluent French I surrender!
- Excuse my french... ...but I surrender.
- Why did the limbless gladiator surrender? He was unarmed and defeated.
- The French I can speak fluent french, watch this... "I Surrender"
- How do you say "I surrender" in french? "Bonjour"
- What did the Russians say when the Germans surrendered KV-1
- The French Club is Really Fun! Until you have to surrender to the German Club.
French Surrender Jokes
Here is a list of funny french surrender jokes and even better french surrender puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- Why wasn't Euro Disney popular? Every time they set off the fireworks, the French surrendered.
- Did you hear that the French President is getting divorced? Apparently he came home early and caught his wife surrendering to a German.
- The key to pronouncing a word in French ...is to try to say it the way it's written, and then surrender halfway through.
- What is the first thing French soldiers learn, when joining the military ? The phrase "I surrender" in german
- French Presidential bodyguard accidentally discharges weapon whilst on duty... France & Italy have both offer their immediate unconditional surrender.
- Why is the French flag white in the middle? So that you can fold the red and blue to surrender.
- Did you know that the eskimos has 32 different words for snow? And the bedouins has 47 different words for sands? And the french has 54 different words for "I surrender"?
- When you think about it the Syrian air strikes weren't as devastating as they could have been... But that's mainly down to the French missiles surrendering before they hit the ground
- TIL about the French flag. TIL the French flag was designed so that if you fold back the red and the blue it becomes a surrender flag.
- A tire exploded in Paris 3 french surrendered
Uproarious Surrender Jokes to Share with Friends
What funny jokes about surrender you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean rebellion jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make surrender pranks.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Why don't they have fireworks at Euro Disney?
Because every time they shoot them off, the French try to surrender.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A man comes into jail the first time in life...
On the first day in the shower a huge hairy guy full of muscles comes out of the fog right to him :"You're my new wife now. Let's get it on."
The man looks all around but theres nobody who'll help him and he surrenders in fear of what might come.
"With or without spit?" asks the big hairy man. The first-timer answered "When I have to: with spit" The big man turns around and yells into the showers: "Yo Spit, he says you can come too."
Brexit fallout: my French Toast has just surrendered to my English Muffins. Germany is sending in the Luftwaffle... these events could engulf the entire continental breakfast.
and my Irish coffee is drunk. Again.
France and Italy declare war...
France surrenders and Italy switches sides. Both countries lose.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
A Frenchman and an Ethiopian got into a heated argument.
The Frenchman said, "We have better food, wine, standard of living, transportation, infrastructure, economy, and GDP than you! What do you have? Nothing!"
The Ethiopian answered, "At least we didn't surrender to the Axis!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
There is a fence
A deer walks up to the fence and jumps over it.
An antelope walks up to the fence and goes under it.
A French guy walks up to the fence and surrenders.
A German guy walks up to the fence and builds a bigger gun.
An Italian walks up to the fence and starts eating pasta.
A pothead walks up to the fence, sits on it and starts smoking w**....
An American walks up to the fence, shoots the pothead, tests how sturdy the fence is, and strips it up to put it on the Mexican border.
Did you hear about the war between France and Italy?
Italy switched sides and France surrendered
Hi dad, I'm vegan
- Hi vegan, I'm... I cannot, it's too much! I can't tell this joke EVERY morning. I surrender, you're my kryptonite!
What's the difference between the Taliban and the Confederacy?
The Taliban never surrendered.
The CIA, KGB and MI6 decide to have a contest.
Each is given the task to find a rabbit
realeased in the woods.
The CIA uses spyplanes and satellites and finds the rabbit in 2 hours.
The MI6 deploys recon and search teams and finds it in 3 hours.
The KGB return after 1 hour with a badly beaten bear who cries out "I am the rabbit and I surrender".
So Putin is woken up at 02:30 in the morning.
"Vladimir Vladimirovich, the Ukrainians want to discuss the terms of surrender." says Putin's secretary.
Putin sits up on his bed and says: "Great, give me my phone, I'll call Zelinsky."
The secretary answers: "That won't be necessary, they are standing behind the door. Also, they gave us an hour."
