The Best 50 Surprisingly Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Surprisingly jokes. There are some surprisingly organism jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these surprisingly surprise surprise puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 Funniest Surprisingly Jokes and Puns

I recently started dating a woman in a wheelchair, and I stood her up.

Not surprisingly that's when she fell for me...and you know what, it became a bit of a drag...but now we're on a roll.

A magician and his parrot...

This magician was getting annoyed with his parrot, because during every trick the parrot would spoil it by saying something along the lines of "It's in your shirt, braack." He then decided to get rid of him, so he took him on a ship, and into the boiler room. The magician shot the parrot, but missed. The ship exploded and the only survivors were the magician and the parrot, surprisingly. The parrot then says, "Alright, braack, you got me, where is the ship, braack."

Request: Jokes for my five year old son

My son is starting to get into jokes and it's surprisingly difficult to find joke books that are appropriate for his age. Most recycle old jokes with outdated references that he doesn't even understand. Some of the references are so musty I don't even get them. Does anyone have good jokes/riddles I can pass along?

Surprisingly joke, Request: Jokes for my five year old son

Lucky Numbers

There was this man by the name of Mr Five.

His lucky number was, not surprisingly, 5.

He was 55 years old, ate 5 times a day, always brought with him $55 in his wallet and always wore a shirt with 5 pockets.

One day, he saw a horse by the name of Lucky Five was racing.

He bet $5555.55 on the horse.

After 5 hours the results are out.

Sure enough the horse comes in fifth.

I just read a list of 100 things to do before you die...

Surprisingly enough, yell for help wasn't anywhere on it.


My Czech mate is surprisingly bad at chess

Computers and taxis are surprisingly similar.

They both crash when the drivers stop working.

Surprisingly joke, Computers and taxis are surprisingly similar.

What's the difference between falling 2 ft and 200 ft?

200 ft: Aaaaaaaaa, bump
2 ft: Bump, aaaaaaaaa

(Yes, it's an old, really old joke. Surprisingly haven't seen it here, yet.)

A guy goes to a crowded party and wants to get a drink from the hors d'oeuvres table.

Surprisingly, there is no punch line.

If Great Britian leaves the EU then it will be like its own Hong Kong

Owned by the British, surprisingly prosperous for its size, and desperately longing to be white.

What happened when Isaac Newton met the apple?

He found the apple was a surprisingly down-to-Earth kinda guy.

You can explore surprisingly unsurprisingly reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean surprisingly unexpectedly dad jokes. There are also surprisingly puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


People say Frankenstein's monster had a temper,

but actually he was surprisingly level headed.

The smartest dog

One day, two women were arguing about whose dog is smarter.

The first woman says, "My dog's so smart, every morning he waits for the paper-boy to come around and then he takes the newspaper and brings it to me."

The second woman replies, "I know.."

The first woman, surprisingly ask, "How do YOU know?"

The second woman says, "My dog told me."

A farmer once successfully bred a three-legged chicken...

and bragged about it to his neighbors on how fast it was. A billionaire was passing by and took a liking to it. So he made a million dollar offer to the farmer for the chicken. Surprisingly, the farmer declined.

'Then, I'll give you five million for it,' said the billionaire.

'Sorry, I can't,' said the farmer.

'10 million dollars, I don't believe you'll turn down the offer'

'I'm truly sorry. I can't.'

The billionaire was stumped and asked, 'Is 10 million not enough?'

The farmer only sighed and reply, 'It's not that I don't want to sell it, that darned chicken is literally too fast for me to catch it.'

I vandalized an art major's car today.

Removing pizza delivery signs is surprisingly easy.

What do you get when you cross a Mexican cholo and an ill tempered Irishman?

... a surprisingly stable person; according to my Homie O'Statis.

Surprisingly joke, What do you get when you cross a Mexican cholo and an ill tempered Irishman?

My priest is surprisingly homophobic...

...for a man who spends his nights on his knees, begging for another man to come for a second time.

So, there was this rich dude...

One day, as he is driving his fancy car down the road, he is singing to himself I love my BMW, I love BMW. He was so wrapped up in his song he missed a turn and hit a tree. Surprisingly he survived, but instead of calling for help he was crying out my BMW, oh my BMW. Just then a good Samaritan drove by and cried out, "Sir, sir, you're bleeding! And my god, your left arm is gone!" The rich dude, horrified, screamed "My Rolex! My Rolex!"

Found a surprisingly emotional pornographic film today.

It was a real tear jerker!


Did you hear about the deaf person who was cut up but was surprisingly happy about the whole thing?

The headline was: Mutilated mute elated

The etymology of the word "politics" is surprisingly accurate.

"poly" meaning "many", and tics meaning "small bloodsucking parasites."

What do you call a day with a surprisingly low amount of tables?

A notable day!

Surprisingly, Doug Jones isn't the best thing to come out of Alabama

I-65 North has been saving people from Alabama since 1959

[OC] So a Comcast technician asks a woman on a date

Surprisingly, she says yes. He says "Great! Be at your house on Tuesday and I'll pick you up anywhere from 11am to 6pm." - Inspired by my recent internet installation experience.

UN sent a survey to children from different country: " Regarding the problem of food shortage in other countries, what's your opinion?" Surprisingly no kids understand the question.

American kids: "what's other countries ...?"
European kids: "what's shortage ...?"
Africa kids: "what's food ...?"
Chinese kids: "what's my opinion ...?"

Out of desperation, I robbed a bank dressed as a frog and being a novice, the cops caught me right away. I thought I was going away to the big house for a very long time, but surprisingly, the judge was lenient and let me go...

...because it was the first time I had ever Kermitted a crime.

If being a 23 year old Norwegian swimwear model has taught me anything

It's that catfishing is surprisingly easy online

I like my sunglasses like I like my politicians,

Polarized and able to be bought surprisingly cheap.

I just had to carry a box of photons

It was surprisingly light

Argentina is surprisingly cold at this time of the year.

It's bordering on Chile

I went through this list of "100 things to do before you die"

Surprisingly, yelling for help is not one of them.

Do Las Vegas churches accept gambling chips?

Do Las Vegas churches accept gambling chips?
This may come as a surprise to those of you not living in Las Vegas , but there are more Catholic churches than casinos.
Not surprisingly, some worshipers at Sunday services will give casino chips rather than cash when the basket is passed.
Since they get chips from many different casinos, the churches have devised a method to collect the offerings.
The churches send all their collected chips to a nearby Franciscan monastery for sorting and then the chips are taken to the casinos of origin and cashed in.
This is done by the chip monks.

What kind of cancer do gnomes get?

Mela-gnome-a
Written by Ruby, age 7 (almost 8). Surprisingly dark.

My company recently hired Frankenstein's monster to run our HR department. He's surprisingly good at it.

Turns out he's a real people person.

It was surprisingly easy to get a job at the zoo as a computer scientist

Probably because I am fluent in Python

I thought I had Covid 19 so I decided to give it a go and I injected myself with bleach...

Surprisingly I'm all white now.

Because hippos are surprisingly dangerous, zoologists use the Pythagorean theorem to calculate the length of their backs.

This is called finding the hippotenuse.

I ran 10 miles today.

Surprisingly hard when you're carrying 25 pounds of cocaine.

A customer was bothering the waiter in a restaurant.

First, he asked that the air conditioning be turned up because he was too hot, then he asked it be turned down cause he was too cold, and so on for about half an hour. Surprisingly, the waiter was very patient, he walked back and forth and never once got angry.

So finally, a second customer asked him why he didn't throw out the pest."Oh, I really don't care or mind," said the waiter with a smile. "We don't even have an air conditioner."

North Korea is handling Covid surprisingly well

Last week 9/10 doctors said Covid-19 was under control,



This week the stat went up to 9/9!

Two lady lesbians, both called Rachel, tried to buy a cake for their upcoming wedding. However, the baker refused to serve 'their kind'...

Not surprisingly, the two girls were hugely offended and asked him why he had a problem with gay nuptials.

The baker replied that he had no problems at all, however, he wasn't a supporter inter-Rachel marriage.

Alcohol and Ramen

Alcohol and ramen are surprisingly similar. Both are widely available at college, both are consumed daily there, and both will slowly kill you from the inside.

Making a deep dish pizza is surprisingly super easy!

It's a pizza cake!

Did you know that Vegas has more Catholic Churches than casinos?

Not surprisingly, some Sunday worshipers give casino chips when the collection basket is passed. Since they get chips for many different casinos the churches have devised a system to handle the collections. The churches send all of their collected chips to a nearby Franciscan monastery for sorting and then taken to the individual casinos to redeem for cash.

This is done by the chip monks.

A Teacher taught a very hyperactive class

The class had students from many parts of the world. One day the teacher was late and when she came to the class, it was pure chaos in there. Americans were constantly quarrelling, Australians were standing on their head, Italians were making pasta. But the Spanish kid was surprisingly quiet and was in his seat.

Nobody expects the Spanish in position

It's surprisingly common for men to die during sex.

You never know if they're coming or going.

Due to health concerns, my doctor recommend I go on a strict vegetarian diet, and practice portion control.

I am happy to announce that I am down to one vegetarian a day, as they are surprisingly filling.

Al Gore is in the wrong line of work

Some people's names match their careers surprisingly well. Imagine a psychic named Krystal Ball or a stylist named Barbera Cutter.

But Al Gore is a failure in this regard. He had the perfect opportunity to start a math rock band in the 80s or 90s and just chose to not. It should have been fate.

I personally will never let it go that I'll never hear an album from the math rock legends the Al Gore Rhythms.

This year my wife was struggling for ideas on what to get me for my birthday.

I said that for my birthday, I would like a threesome. I've never had one before, and I would feel like less of a creep if she organized it.

She was surprisingly on-board. She said that she had a friend from college who would probably be up for it.

But I think I ruined the night when I asked her who she had in mind for the third person.

We did a DNA test on our bullfrog from Arkansas…

Surprisingly, it was about 80% French, 15% German, and a tad Pole…

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the surprisingly surprise visit jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working surprisingly surprise surprise piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

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