Supreme Court Jokes
82 supreme court jokes and hilarious supreme court puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about supreme court that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Funniest Supreme Court Short Jokes
Short supreme court jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The supreme court humour may include short supreme jokes also.
- Deaf people aren't known to be very rational They have trouble making sound decisions.
- Picking a Supreme Court Justice is a lot like crossing a river... It all comes down to Roe v Wade
- The Supreme Court has changed dramatically since Justice Ginsberg died. It has become Ruth less.
- This joke reigns supreme Lately I've noticed that the Supreme Court has been more ruthless than usual.
- If Mexico sends their rapists to the United States, where does the United States send theirs? To the Supreme Court.
- Donald Trump better not remove Justice Ginsberg from the supreme court. that would be ruthless
- Breaking News: Supreme court has ruled that basic intelligence tests for Election voting is Discriminatory. The judge said that it is unfair to block all Republicans from voting.
- yesterday, Judge Thompson issued the longest sentence in the Supreme Court's history, needless to say, it was run-on.
- Rumor has it there's a basketball court on the roof of the Supreme Court building. It's the highest court in the land.
- Did you hear about the supreme court justice who was caught stealing the scraps from restaurant booths? Police identified her as Booth Raider Ginsburg.
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Supreme Court One Liners
Which supreme court one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with supreme court? I can suggest the ones about court case and court.
- Ever since Bader Ginsburg died… … The American Supreme Court has been Ruthless.
- TIL Supreme Court judge kidnapped by cannibals in the caribbean! Justice was served.
- Supreme Court Is just regular court with sour cream and tomatoes.
- Is it just me, or is the US Supreme Court getting increasingly brutal? Ruthless, even.
- The Supreme Court is… Ruthless.
- What was the Supreme Court ruling on constipation? It's unconstitutional.
- Why was the hamster a bad Supreme Court Justice? Because his mind was always on a pellet.
- What kind of underwear does a Supreme Court justice wear? Briefs.
- Senate: Red House: Red Supreme Court: Red President: Orange
- What supreme Court case involved people in a canoe, stranded far from shore? Row v. Wade
- What has eighteen legs and three vaginas? The Supreme Court.
- So where do hypebeasts go to settle clothing disputes? The Supreme Court
- Brett was swore into the supreme court las night I spent the whole night cussing him out.
- Which Supreme Court case involved the use of integrals? Plus C vs Ferguson
- Did you hear about the cat that wanted to be a justice on the Supreme Court? Just kitten.
Supreme Court Funny Jokes And Hilarious Puns.
What funny jokes about supreme court you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean senate jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make supreme court pranks.
The supreme court issued a ban not allowing Chuck Norris to flex his muscles, for fear of public safety.
In the Supreme Court of Composition...
"Your honor, this man has - with malice aforethought - clearly, wantonly, and remorselessly copied my newest song's Time Signature.
You might call this a clear-cut-case of Four-Forgery."
A right-wing law firm is trying to overturn Roe v Wade.
They find their test plaintiff, a man whose daughter had gotten an abortion after he forbade it. The firm sues the doctors, and the appeals go all the way to the Supreme Court, exactly as intended. The Court even agrees to hear the case ... only to uphold Roe v Wade, 5 - 4.
All in all, it was a classic case of abort, retry, fail.
God is in an argument with Jehovah...
about which one of their faiths is the true one.
"That's it, I've had it with this! I am taking the matter to the supreme court." he said
"I'd like to see you try." said Jehovah. "I have witnesses."
Did you hear about the Supreme Court ruling?
Looks like Tosh.0 fans can finally get married in California!
What do you call the snowman who was appointed to the Supreme Court?
Just ice.
whats the difference between Court and Supreme Court?
Supreme Court comes with sour cream and guac.
Supreme Court legalizes lesbian marriage.
I heard Netflix is making a new documentary on the Supreme Courts ruling...
Calling it 50 states of gay
Did you hear about the Supreme Court ruling that you can marry a sandwich?
Yeah, the BLT community are very excited!
Did you hear?
The supreme court ruled that gay marriage has extended to swans.
President Obama announces his intention to serve on the U.S. Supreme Court
"I can't wait until I'm in a position to have a real impact on the country!" said an excited Obama.
What Supreme Court decision applies to fishermen bringing a small boat to shore?
Row v. Wade
What if George Lucas was the new Supreme Court justice?
Lucas gets indicted after video surfaces of him tampering with previous decisions he made.
President Trump's choice for Supreme Court Justice is strongly opposed to euthanasia.
I wonder what he's got against kids in the Orient?
Did you hear about the landmark Supreme Court case concerning the best way to cross a shallow creek?
It was *Row versus Wade.*
Where does a hypebeast go after he is charged with m**...?
The Supreme Court
People keep talking about the future of the US Supreme Court
They're afraid it's going to be completely ruthless.
One day, Justice Ginsburg will no longer be a part of the Supreme Court
On that day, the court will be Ruthless.
With this new Janus Supreme Court Decision
A lot of Conservatives are finally going to be able to secede from the Union.
The Supreme Court ruled against increasing tax on flatbread imports from India.
The case was closed by a no naan cents judge.
Brett Kavanaugh has stated that he will not be pressured into withdrawing his Supreme Court bid by the allegations made against him.
He sounds like the kind of guy who just won't take 'no' for an answer.
Worried about his Supreme Court confirmation, Brett Kavanaugh decided to unwind by ordering a 16 year old whiskey.
She refused to drink it.
We cannot allow an attempted r**... on the Supreme Court
It shows a lack of dedication.
When the POTUS picks a Supreme Court Justice,
He's not picking our best. They're bringing drugs.. they're bringing crime.. They're rapists. And some, I assume, are good people.
I just read the news article about Kavanuagh throwing ice at a bar.
If it's true, ordering beer with ice should disqualify you from the Supreme Court.
What do Brett Kavanuagh's chances of getting approved as a Supreme Court Justice and my success rate on Tinder have in common?
They're both 0%
Supreme Court
Year 2022; Republicans Vote Child-r**... into SCOTUS 51-49
Year 2027; Republicans Vote m**... into SCOTUS 50-50 + Veep
Year 2035; Republicans Vote Ivanka Trump into SCOTUS 62-38
A r**... walks into the Supreme Court.
Today sea levels continue to rise....
From liberal tears after that U.S. Supreme Court election.
Kavanaugh is sworn in as the 114th Supreme Court Justice
Not the first time he's gotten off.
What's the best way to feel better when everyone, including your friends, hates you with a passion?
Join the Supreme Court
What is the difference between Yes and No?
Don't worry, the Supreme Court doesn't know either.
Joke: A s**... harasser and a s**... assaulter walk into a bar...
Ohhh wait sorry, that's just Clarence Thomas and Brett Kavanaugh walking into the Supreme Court.
Another good thing to come out of the Supreme Court forcing Trump to disclose his taxes
We're gonna finally learn if having teenage h**... pee on your face is claimed as entertainment expense or medical.
What did the lawyers for the Creek Nation say to the lawyers for Oklahoma after their historic Supreme Court win?
"Looks like we Okla-owned-yah!"
A r**..., a plagiarist, and a cult member walk into a bar...
Oh wait, I meant the Supreme Court.
The first female president is being sworn in.
Her Jewish mother is sitting in the second row next to a Supreme Court Justice, watching. The judge leans over and says, "Madam, you must be VERY proud."
The mother says, "Well, you see that girl with her hand on the Bible? Her brother's a doctor."
Library of Congress bomber…
Yesterday's attempted bomber said there are 4 more bombs planted in DC. After botching b**... Congress by showing up at the Library of Congress, the FBI has ordered the immediate evacuation of :
-the Richmond Mall's Supreme Food Court
-The Hexagon Building on Connecticut Ave
-International House of Pancakes
-literally anyone with a white house.
Probably done before: What's a pirate's LEAST favourite letter?
Dear Mr Redbeard,
It has come to our attention that you have been illegally duplicating and reselling copywrited movies without permission.
As such, and utilising the full jurisdiction of the Federal Communications Authority, you are subpoenaed to appear before the Federal Supreme Court to face charges on the time and date so indicated below.
Regards,
J. L. Peabody
Chief Video Piracy Investigator
A District Court judge, a Circuit Court judge, and a Supreme Court justice are sitting at a bar
The District Court judge says, "I interpret the Constitution the way I read it."
The Circuit Court judge says, "I interpret the Constitution the way it's written."
The Supreme Court justice says, "The Constitution isn't anything, until I interpret it."
(original joke was three umpires talking about calling strikes)
The Lawyer
Satan appears before a lawyer and says, "I will make a deal with you. You will become the most successful attorney who has ever lived. You will be rich beyond imagination, and known to everyone on the planet. You will be appointed to the Supreme Court, and your rulings will be read and studied for decades to come. All I ask in return is the souls of your wife and your three children."
The lawyer sits with his head in his hands, thinking for several minutes. Finally he says, "Okay, what's the catch?"