Supper Jokes
75 supper jokes and hilarious supper puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about supper that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Check out these hilarious supper jokes for a great way to liven up your next family gathering or Passover seder. From the disciples in the Bible, to the buffet line, these jokes will have everyone laughing in no time.
Funniest Supper Short Jokes
Short supper jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The supper humour may include short super jokes also.
- Judas: Hey Jesus, you coming to the last supper? Jesus: the what?
Judas: the supper…I mean are you coming to the supper? - What did Jesus say right before the last supper? Everybody get on this side of the table if you want to be in the picture.
- Jesus at Last Supper *breaks bread* This is my body
*pours wine* This is my blood
*opens jar of mayo*...
Judas: I'm gonna stop u right there - I think i just wrote a joke out of my pathetic love life while fixing supper and here it goes. What does a bachelor eat the most? Balonely sandwiches.
- At the Last Supper... [At Last Supper]
*Jesus raises bread*
"This is my body!"
*Jesus raises wine*
"And this is my blood!"
*Pulls out 9 of Clubs*
"And this is your card"
*Apostles go nuts* - I can't help but think that The Last Supper must have been a bit tense... ...with Jesus relating the bread to his broken skin and the wine to his own blood.
I bet no one touched the meatballs. - Jesus sits down at the Last Supper with his disciples. He rises and addresses them: "I'm the son of God."
"No way!" they say.
"Yahweh." - The apostles are at the last supper... Jesus is eating like a slob and spilling wine everywhere and Judas says to him "Were you born in a barn?"
- Last Supper Recently discovered scrolls reveal Jesus' words to his disciples at the Last Supper:
"If you guys want to be in the picture, you've got to get on this side of the table." - Bono once painted himself into The Last Supper he was there on the end, sitting on The Edge
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Supper One Liners
Which supper one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with supper? I can suggest the ones about supreme and supplement.
- My wife and I have decided we don't want children We plan on telling them after supper
- What would be the title of the TV series covering 'The Last Supper'? Breaking Bread.
- What did the veggies say, as they sat down for supper? "Lettuce, pray."
- Where do hungry football players eat? At the supper bowl.
- Why is there no cheese in the menu for the Last Supper? Because Jesus took the wheel.
- What did Jesus eat for dessert after the Last Supper? an Easter Sundae
- I ate some fireflies for supper today. I'm trying to eat light.
- I tried singing for my supper today. Looks like I'm having rotten tomato soup tonight.
- What side dishes did Jesus eat at the last supper? Peas and hominy.
- Jesus, waving around a baguette at The Last Supper "You wanna piece of me!?"
- What did Jesus say at the last supper? Separate checks for everyone!
- Who picked up the tab for the Last Supper? Jesus paid it all.
- How do you say Thanksgiving in Native American? Last Supper
- Where did Jesus buy the supplies for the last supper? At seven unleavened.
- What is an anorexic's favorite punishment? Straight to your room, and no supper for you.
Supper Time Jokes
Here is a list of funny supper time jokes and even better supper time puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- 2 guys were sitting on their couch, discussing the origins of meal times and their names. They thought it was supper interesting.
Uproarious Supper Jokes to Have a Laugh Out Loud Good Time
What funny jokes about supper you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean sumo jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make supper pranks.
Not to worry. I was only testing the smoke detectors.
On a totally unrelated subject. Supper is ready.
Chicken for Supper
So this kid gets home around 6 and his dad asks "where were you?" The kid replies "at my girlfriends studying." The dad says "ok come sit down supper is ready." After a few minutes the kid says "This is great fish dad." The dad replies "Go wash your hands, it's chicken."
So a cannibalistic couple are try to decide what to have for supper one night...
When they hear a knocking at their front door. The husband opens the door where he sees a little boy crying. The kid then says, "Help me I'm lost, my name is Stuart and I live on 3rd street!" The wife hears the commotion and walks over to see what's going on, and the husband turns to her and says, " I guess we're having stew tonight."
How did Jesus feel asset the last supper?
A bit cross.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Last Supper
Jesus started off the dinner by announcing that he is trying some new natural recipes with some very organic ingredients. Peter approaches him and says, "This bread is fantastic! What's in it?"
"I made that from my flesh," Jesus replied.
A bit surprised and disgusted, Peter and all other apostles who were eating the bread regretfully put their pieces back down onto the table.
"This wine is the best I've ever tasted!" said James.
"That's actually just my blood."
James discretely spat the wine back into his cup.
Absolutely chowing down, Judas exclaimed, "I don't care what you tell me is in these, nothing can keep me from these desserts! The filling in these eclairs is absolutely o**...!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Man walks back into a fish n' chip shop...
...Looking down at his supper he asks, "Are you sure this fish was cooked?"
The lady serving behind the counter asks, "How come?!"
"IT'S ATE' ALL THE f**...' CHIPS!" :D
***[Old one but a good'n]***
My friend just brought home five new chickens for her chicken coop, and asked for suggestions for naming them...
I suggested "breakfast, lunch, dinner, brunch and supper..."
Job Fatality in Ireland
An Irish woman is making supper when she hears a knock on the cottage door. It's the priest and he has his hat in his hand, looking solemnly at the ground.
She's says "oh no, it's bad news isn't it father!"
"Yes, tis" says the priest.
"About my husband?? is he dead, father?" She gasps.
"There was a terrible accident at the brewery, he fell into a vat of Guinness and drowned"
"Was it a quick death, father?"
"Truth be told, he got out 3 times to pee"
My dad tonight at dinner. Thought I would share.
My sister was in a hurry to get to a hockey game and was anxious to eat supper.
Sister: We better get eatin' soon.
Dad: I hope not, we still have food to eat.
Sister: *Blank stare*
tl;dr: Eaten vs eating
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
Its poor! But, What happens when Supper stars f**... in public?
lol
Wife and I go to subway...
She says she can't decide between a 12" or a 6". I told her get the 6" sandwich and I'll give you 8 inches after supper
Leonardo da Vinci's painting The Last Supper depicts all apostles and Jesus sitting on one side of the table.
There must have been a show and karaoke.
I always wondered about the guy who washed the dishes after the Last Supper...
...his name could also have been Jesus.
Before marriage every man is a Superman, after marriage he becomes
Supper man
Do groceries, prepare meals, wash dishes...
Jesus was having supper with some Teamsters...
He stood up and said, "Don't do anything until I get back."
So everyone's at the Last Supper...
... and Jesus is speaking to his disciples.
He says "Take this bread, for it is my body. Take this wine, for it is my blood."
Then Peter turns to Paul and whispers "Don't eat the brownies!"
I was nervous I wouldn't know how to make the buns for supper tonight.
But then I remembered: you have to whisk it to get the biscuit.
Why did Jesus drink wine at the last supper?
Because in 3 days, he would be a raisin
Ever look in the fridge and be disappointed that all there is for supper is leftover pizza and beer?
Yeah, me neither...
Jesus and the disciples are at the last supper...
Jesus holds up a piece of bread and says, "This is my body."
Then he holds up a cup of wine, saying," This is my blood."
Then he holds up a jar of mayonnaise and Peter says, "Let me stop you right there, Jesus."
I have no desire to see Wonder Woman, I live with Wonder Woman...
I wonder what that woman's mad at now. I wonder what that woman wants for supper. I wonder where that woman put my keys.
So, Jesus is going over the bill for the Last Supper...
So Jesus is going over the bill for the Last Supper when the apostles notice he has closed his eyes, and is rubbing the bridge of his nose. Exasperated, he asks: "Why... WHY would anyone order wine?"
Why can't Pocohontas kill a deer or escape from jail?
Because she doesn't have a narrow head!
My dad just made this one up at supper.
I'm painting a still life version of The Last Supper with all the apostles as vegetables
Judas is carrot.
Jesus is preparing for the Last Supper...
Jesus: Judas, I need you to go to each and every one of my disciples and tell them to meet me here for supper. Also, stop by the market and get some fish, vegetables, and a dessert. When you've come back and are done cooking, set up the table and our best plates.
Later that evening, while everyone is enjoying their food, Jesus begains in a somber tone, "One of you will betray me -
Judas: "Why do I have to do everything around here?!"
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
King of Jews
Jesus wasn't known as the king of Jews until the last supper when he decided not to tip.
During the 80's, many college students from Eastern Bloc countries - Poland, Hungary, and Romania met each other at a summer camp
Sitting around the campfire after supper, these young people tried their best to communicate with each other (Polish, Hungarian, and Romanian are totally not related), ultimately having to resort to some kind of sign language
Then one dude got an idea: Hey, we all learned Russian in high school, why don't we try speaking in Russian?
… After a brief, thoughtful thinking and pause … everyone returned back to that sign language
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
I killed a snake and tried to eat it for supper.
Now I've got Asp Burger syndrome.
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
My obese Ex-wife, Ally, worked in a Californian grenade factory. She got struck by a grenade during her lunch break while covered in sticky u**....
Supper Cali frag a lick stick ex pee Ally dough sus
⚠️ Warning ⚠️
This joke may contain profanity or explicit language
The young man finally made up his mind to tell his mother he was gay.
He could no longer keep it a secret so one evening when she was in the kitchen making supper, he took the plunge and told her.
Mum, I have something to tell you, I'm gay.
Immediately, his mother replied, Does being gay mean you have men's d**... in your mouth?
Well … stammered the young man. Yes, it does.
In that case, she said angrily, don't you ever criticise my cooking again.
Tonight I made salmon for supper
As it was gently cooking in a warm bath of garlic, herbs, lemon, wine, and onion I got a visit from a Fish and Wildlife officer. He said sir we have reason to believe that salmon has been poached
Little Johnny's preschool class went on a field trip to the fire station.
The firefighter giving the presentation held up a smoke detector and asked the class: "Does anyone know what this is?"
Little Johnny's hand shot up and the firefighter called on him.
Little Johnny replied: "That's how Mommy knows supper is ready!"
"Honey," said this husband to his wife, "I invited a friend home for supper."
"What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I didn't go shopping, all the dishes are dirty, and I don't feel like cooking a fancy meal!"
"I know all that."
"Then, why did you invite a friend for supper?"
"Because the poor guy is thinking about getting married."
Gone fishin'
I remember my brother teaching me to fish. I was so proud when he complimented me on my ability to securely put the worm on the hook. I didn't realize I was being had until I announced at the supper table that I was a " master baiter", and my Mom nearly choked.
