The Best 44 Supper Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Supper jokes. There are some supper dessert jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these supper table puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Supper Jokes and Puns

Not to worry. I was only testing the smoke detectors.

On a totally unrelated subject. Supper is ready.

So I got home late last night, and my wife says, "Would you like some supper?"

I say, "Oh, yes! What are the choices?"

"Yes, or no."

Chicken for Supper

So this kid gets home around 6 and his dad asks "where were you?" The kid replies "at my girlfriends studying." The dad says "ok come sit down supper is ready." After a few minutes the kid says "This is great fish dad." The dad replies "Go wash your hands, it's chicken."

Supper joke, Chicken for Supper

What did the veggies say, as they sat down for supper?

"Lettuce, pray."

Bono once painted himself into The Last Supper

he was there on the end, sitting on The Edge

Job Fatality in Ireland

An Irish woman is making supper when she hears a knock on the cottage door. It's the priest and he has his hat in his hand, looking solemnly at the ground.

She's says "oh no, it's bad news isn't it father!"

"Yes, tis" says the priest.

"About my husband?? is he dead, father?" She gasps.

"There was a terrible accident at the brewery, he fell into a vat of Guinness and drowned"

"Was it a quick death, father?"

"Truth be told, he got out 3 times to pee"

Jesus at Last Supper

*breaks bread* This is my body

*pours wine* This is my blood

*opens jar of mayo*...

Judas: I'm gonna stop u right there

Supper joke, Jesus at Last Supper

Jesus at the last supper

Jesus sits at the Last Supper, beginning to serve his guests.

First, he hands a basket of bread to go around, "These represent my body, and the pain I shall endure for my people."

Next, he begins pouring everyone wine, "This represents my blood, and how I am part of everyone."

He goes to open a jar of mayonnaise, Judas quickly takes it away from him, "Now I'm gonna have to stop you right there."

At the Last Supper...

[At Last Supper]

*Jesus raises bread*
"This is my body!"
*Jesus raises wine*
"And this is my blood!"
*Pulls out 9 of Clubs*
"And this is your card"
*Apostles go nuts*

What side dishes did Jesus eat at the last supper?

Peas and hominy.

Jesus at the Last Supper.


*breaks bread* - This is my body!

*holds a glass of wine* - This is my blood.

*starts to open a jar of mayo*

Judas: Sorry Jesus, I will have to stop you there.

You can explore supper disciples reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean supper lunchtime dad jokes. There are also supper puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.

Last Supper

Recently discovered scrolls reveal Jesus' words to his disciples at the Last Supper:

"If you guys want to be in the picture, you've got to get on this side of the table."

Jesus sits down at the Last Supper with his disciples.

He rises and addresses them: "I'm the son of God."
"No way!" they say.

I can't help but think that The Last Supper must have been a bit tense...

...with Jesus relating the bread to his broken skin and the wine to his own blood.

I bet no one touched the meatballs.

I ate some fireflies for supper today.

I'm trying to eat light.

Judas: CΒ΄mon Jesus weΒ΄re gonna be late for last supper

Jesus: The what??
Judas: The supper.. weΒ΄re gonna be late for supper.

Supper joke, Judas: CΒ΄mon Jesus weΒ΄re gonna be late for last supper

So everyone's at the Last Supper...

... and Jesus is speaking to his disciples.

He says "Take this bread, for it is my body. Take this wine, for it is my blood."

Then Peter turns to Paul and whispers "Don't eat the brownies!"

Ever look in the fridge and be disappointed that all there is for supper is leftover pizza and beer?

Yeah, me neither...

I think i just wrote a joke out of my pathetic love life while fixing supper and here it goes. What does a bachelor eat the most?

Balonely sandwiches.

I tried singing for my supper today.

Looks like I'm having rotten tomato soup tonight.

What did Jesus say right before the last supper?

Everybody get on this side of the table if you want to be in the picture.

Jesus and the disciples are at the last supper...

Jesus holds up a piece of bread and says, "This is my body."

Then he holds up a cup of wine, saying," This is my blood."

Then he holds up a jar of mayonnaise and Peter says, "Let me stop you right there, Jesus."

What did Jesus eat for dessert after the Last Supper?

an Easter Sundae

Guy takes a hooker out for supper.

He giver her his peas, she gives him herpes.

Why is there no cheese in the menu for the Last Supper?

Because Jesus took the wheel.

So, Jesus is going over the bill for the Last Supper...

So Jesus is going over the bill for the Last Supper when the apostles notice he has closed his eyes, and is rubbing the bridge of his nose. Exasperated, he asks: "Why... WHY would anyone order wine?"

Jesus calls the restaurant to book the table for the Last Supper

"Table for 26, please."

"26? I thought there were only 13 of you."

"Yes, that's right, but we're all going to sit on one side."

I'm painting a still life version of The Last Supper with all the apostles as vegetables

Judas is carrot.

The apostles are at the last supper...

Jesus is eating like a slob and spilling wine everywhere and Judas says to him "Were you born in a barn?"

Jesus is preparing for the Last Supper...

Jesus: Judas, I need you to go to each and every one of my disciples and tell them to meet me here for supper. Also, stop by the market and get some fish, vegetables, and a dessert. When you've come back and are done cooking, set up the table and our best plates.

Later that evening, while everyone is enjoying their food, Jesus begains in a somber tone, "One of you will betray me -

Judas: "Why do I have to do everything around here?!"

King of Jews

Jesus wasn't known as the king of Jews until the last supper when he decided not to tip.

The Last Supper

*Jesus raises cup of wine*

Jesus: This is my blood

*Jesus raises plate of bread*

Jesus: This is my body

*Jesus raises tub of mayonnaise*

Jesus: This is m-


Jesus, waving around a baguette at The Last Supper

"You wanna piece of me!?"

My obese Ex-wife, Ally, worked in a Californian grenade factory. She got struck by a grenade during her lunch break while covered in sticky urine.

Supper Cali frag a lick stick ex pee Ally dough sus

At the last supper, Jesus breaks the bread and says "this is my body", pours the wine and says "this is my blood"...

...and then opens a jar of mayo and Judas says "Okay buddy I'm gonna stop you right there."

At the Last Supper, Jesus got out a loaf of bread and said "this is my body, eat it to remember me." Then Jesus got out a glass of wine and said "this is my blood, drink it to remember me."

Then Jesus got out a jar of mayonnaise and THAT'S when Judas knew this was going too far.

Jesus enters the restaurant where the last supper is going to take place. Jesus: table for 26, please Waiter: I count only 13 people

Jesus: Yeah, but we are all going to sit on the same side

The young man finally made up his mind to tell his mother he was gay.

He could no longer keep it a secret so one evening when she was in the kitchen making supper, he took the plunge and told her.

Mum, I have something to tell you, I'm gay.

Immediately, his mother replied, Does being gay mean you have men's dicks in your mouth?

Well … stammered the young man. Yes, it does.

In that case, she said angrily, don't you ever criticise my cooking again.

Tonight I made salmon for supper

As it was gently cooking in a warm bath of garlic, herbs, lemon, wine, and onion I got a visit from a Fish and Wildlife officer. He said sir we have reason to believe that salmon has been poached

The other day I decided to grill a chicken for supper.

I grilled it for over TWO HOURS, but it still wouldn't tell me why it crossed the road.

Jesus and his disciples walk into a restaurant for the Last Supper.

Jesus: "Table for 26 please"
waiter: "But there are only 13 of you"
Jesus:"Yes but we all want to sit on the same side!"

Where do hungry football players eat?

At the supper bowl.

Little Johnny's preschool class went on a field trip to the fire station.

The firefighter giving the presentation held up a smoke detector and asked the class: "Does anyone know what this is?"

Little Johnny's hand shot up and the firefighter called on him.

Little Johnny replied: "That's how Mommy knows supper is ready!"

My wife and I have decided we don't want children

We plan on telling them after supper

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the supper appetizer jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working supper breakfast piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes