Supper Jokes
75 supper jokes and hilarious supper puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about supper that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
Check out these hilarious supper jokes for a great way to liven up your next family gathering or Passover seder. From the disciples in the Bible, to the buffet line, these jokes will have everyone laughing in no time.
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Funniest Supper Short Jokes
Short supper jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The supper humour may include short super jokes also.
- Judas: Hey Jesus, you coming to the last supper? Jesus: the what?
Judas: the supper…I mean are you coming to the supper? - Judas: C´mon Jesus we´re gonna be late for last supper Jesus: The what??
Judas: The supper.. we´re gonna be late for supper. - What did Jesus say right before the last supper? Everybody get on this side of the table if you want to be in the picture.
- Jesus and his disciples walk into a restaurant for the Last Supper. Jesus: "Table for 26 please"
waiter: "But there are only 13 of you"
Jesus:"Yes but we all want to sit on the same side!" - Jesus at Last Supper *breaks bread* This is my body
*pours wine* This is my blood
*opens jar of mayo*...
Judas: I'm gonna stop u right there - I think i just wrote a joke out of my pathetic love life while fixing supper and here it goes. What does a bachelor eat the most? Balonely sandwiches.
- At the last supper Jesus lifted the bread and spoke, "This is my body." He then lifted the wine and said, "This is my blood."
He lifted a jar of mayo...
Peter: "Okay, that's enough!" - The other day I decided to grill a chicken for supper. I grilled it for over TWO HOURS, but it still wouldn't tell me why it crossed the road.
- At the Last Supper... [At Last Supper]
*Jesus raises bread*
"This is my body!"
*Jesus raises wine*
"And this is my blood!"
*Pulls out 9 of Clubs*
"And this is your card"
*Apostles go nuts* - Jesus enters the restaurant where the last supper is going to take place. Jesus: table for 26, please Waiter: I count only 13 people Jesus: Yeah, but we are all going to sit on the same side
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Supper One Liners
Which supper one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with supper? I can suggest the ones about supreme and supplement.
- My wife and I have decided we don't want children We plan on telling them after supper
- What would be the title of the TV series covering 'The Last Supper'? Breaking Bread.
- What did the veggies say, as they sat down for supper? "Lettuce, pray."
- Where do hungry football players eat? At the supper bowl.
- Why is there no cheese in the menu for the Last Supper? Because Jesus took the wheel.
- What did Jesus eat for dessert after the Last Supper? an Easter Sundae
- I ate some fireflies for supper today. I'm trying to eat light.
- I tried singing for my supper today. Looks like I'm having rotten tomato soup tonight.
- What side dishes did Jesus eat at the last supper? Peas and hominy.
- Jesus, waving around a baguette at The Last Supper "You wanna piece of me!?"
- What did Jesus say at the last supper? Separate checks for everyone!
- I killed a snake and tried to eat it for supper. Now I've got Asp Burger syndrome.
- You know what Jesus was saying in "The Last Supper"? Separate checks, please.
- Who picked up the tab for the Last Supper? Jesus paid it all.
- How do you say Thanksgiving in Native American? Last Supper
Supper Time Jokes
Here is a list of funny supper time jokes and even better supper time puns that will make you laugh with friends.
- 2 guys were sitting on their couch, discussing the origins of meal times and their names. They thought it was supper interesting.
Uproarious Supper Jokes to Have a Laugh Out Loud Good Time
What funny jokes about supper you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean sumo jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make supper pranks.
Not to worry. I was only testing the smoke detectors.
On a totally unrelated subject. Supper is ready.
So I got home late last night, and my wife says, "Would you like some supper?"
I say, "Oh, yes! What are the choices?"
"Yes, or no."
Chicken for Supper
So this kid gets home around 6 and his dad asks "where were you?" The kid replies "at my girlfriends studying." The dad says "ok come sit down supper is ready." After a few minutes the kid says "This is great fish dad." The dad replies "Go wash your hands, it's chicken."
Bono once painted himself into The Last Supper
he was there on the end, sitting on The Edge
Where did Jesus buy the supplies for the last supper?
At seven unleavened.
My friend just brought home five new chickens for her chicken coop, and asked for suggestions for naming them...
I suggested "breakfast, lunch, dinner, brunch and supper..."
Job Fatality in Ireland
An Irish woman is making supper when she hears a knock on the cottage door. It's the priest and he has his hat in his hand, looking solemnly at the ground.
She's says "oh no, it's bad news isn't it father!"
"Yes, tis" says the priest.
"About my husband?? is he dead, father?" She gasps.
"There was a terrible accident at the brewery, he fell into a vat of Guinness and drowned"
"Was it a quick death, father?"
"Truth be told, he got out 3 times to pee"
Jesus at the last supper
Jesus sits at the Last Supper, beginning to serve his guests.
First, he hands a basket of bread to go around, "These represent my body, and the pain I shall endure for my people."
Next, he begins pouring everyone wine, "This represents my blood, and how I am part of everyone."
He goes to open a jar of mayonnaise, Judas quickly takes it away from him, "Now I'm gonna have to stop you right there."
Jesus at the Last Supper.
Jesus:
*breaks bread* - This is my body!
*holds a glass of wine* - This is my blood.
*starts to open a jar of mayo*
Judas: Sorry Jesus, I will have to stop you there.
Last Supper
Recently discovered scrolls reveal Jesus' words to his disciples at the Last Supper:
"If you guys want to be in the picture, you've got to get on this side of the table."
Jesus sits down at the Last Supper with his disciples.
He rises and addresses them: "I'm the son of God."
"No way!" they say.
"Yahweh."
I can't help but think that The Last Supper must have been a bit tense...
...with Jesus relating the bread to his broken skin and the wine to his own blood.
I bet no one touched the meatballs.
I always wondered about the guy who washed the dishes after the Last Supper...
...his name could also have been Jesus.
So everyone's at the Last Supper...
... and Jesus is speaking to his disciples.
He says "Take this bread, for it is my body. Take this wine, for it is my blood."
Then Peter turns to Paul and whispers "Don't eat the brownies!"
Ever look in the fridge and be disappointed that all there is for supper is leftover pizza and beer?
Yeah, me neither...
Jesus and the Apostles walk into a bar.
"How many?" the hostess asks.
Jesus replies: "Table for 26 please. It's our Last Supper and we all want to sit on the same side."
TIFU By forgetting my wife was allergic to seafood when I got her supper from Subway
Woops, wrong Sub.
Jesus and the disciples are at the last supper...
Jesus holds up a piece of bread and says, "This is my body."
Then he holds up a cup of wine, saying," This is my blood."
Then he holds up a jar of mayonnaise and Peter says, "Let me stop you right there, Jesus."
Guy takes a h**... out for supper.
He giver her his peas, she gives him h**....
So, Jesus is going over the bill for the Last Supper...
So Jesus is going over the bill for the Last Supper when the apostles notice he has closed his eyes, and is rubbing the bridge of his nose. Exasperated, he asks: "Why... WHY would anyone order wine?"
Jesus calls the restaurant to book the table for the Last Supper
"Table for 26, please."
"26? I thought there were only 13 of you."
"Yes, that's right, but we're all going to sit on one side."
Why can't Pocohontas kill a deer or escape from jail?
Because she doesn't have a narrow head!
My dad just made this one up at supper.
I'm painting a still life version of The Last Supper with all the apostles as vegetables
Judas is carrot.
The apostles are at the last supper...
Jesus is eating like a slob and spilling wine everywhere and Judas says to him "Were you born in a barn?"
Jesus is preparing for the Last Supper...
Jesus: Judas, I need you to go to each and every one of my disciples and tell them to meet me here for supper. Also, stop by the market and get some fish, vegetables, and a dessert. When you've come back and are done cooking, set up the table and our best plates.
Later that evening, while everyone is enjoying their food, Jesus begains in a somber tone, "One of you will betray me -
Judas: "Why do I have to do everything around here?!"
King of Jews
Jesus wasn't known as the king of Jews until the last supper when he decided not to tip.
The Last Supper
*Jesus raises cup of wine*
Jesus: This is my blood
*Jesus raises plate of bread*
Jesus: This is my body
*Jesus raises tub of mayonnaise*
Jesus: This is m-
Judas: WOAH WOAH STOP RIGHT THERE
My obese Ex-wife, Ally, worked in a Californian grenade factory. She got struck by a grenade during her lunch break while covered in sticky u**....
Supper Cali frag a lick stick ex pee Ally dough sus
At the last supper, Jesus breaks the bread and says "this is my body", pours the wine and says "this is my blood"...
...and then opens a jar of mayo and Judas says "Okay buddy I'm gonna stop you right there."
At the Last Supper, Jesus got out a loaf of bread and said "this is my body, eat it to remember me." Then Jesus got out a glass of wine and said "this is my blood, drink it to remember me."
Then Jesus got out a jar of mayonnaise and THAT'S when Judas knew this was going too far.
The young man finally made up his mind to tell his mother he was gay.
He could no longer keep it a secret so one evening when she was in the kitchen making supper, he took the plunge and told her.
Mum, I have something to tell you, I'm gay.
Immediately, his mother replied, Does being gay mean you have men's d**... in your mouth?
Well … stammered the young man. Yes, it does.
In that case, she said angrily, don't you ever criticise my cooking again.
Tonight I made salmon for supper
As it was gently cooking in a warm bath of garlic, herbs, lemon, wine, and onion I got a visit from a Fish and Wildlife officer. He said sir we have reason to believe that salmon has been poached
Little Johnny's preschool class went on a field trip to the fire station.
The firefighter giving the presentation held up a smoke detector and asked the class: "Does anyone know what this is?"
Little Johnny's hand shot up and the firefighter called on him.
Little Johnny replied: "That's how Mommy knows supper is ready!"
"Honey," said this husband to his wife, "I invited a friend home for supper."
"What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I didn't go shopping, all the dishes are dirty, and I don't feel like cooking a fancy meal!"
"I know all that."
"Then, why did you invite a friend for supper?"
"Because the poor guy is thinking about getting married."
Yo mama joke I thought of it
Yo mama is so fat and old that she's still eating from the last supper.
Edit : Jesus Christ this blew up. Didn't know so many of you had to release yo mamas from your system.
Gone fishin'
I remember my brother teaching me to fish. I was so proud when he complimented me on my ability to securely put the worm on the hook. I didn't realize I was being had until I announced at the supper table that I was a " master baiter", and my Mom nearly choked.
