The Best 52 Superbowl Jokes

Tide has some serious ad time during the superbowl this year

Must be able to afford it after cornering the teenage snack food market

A die-hard fan was very surprised to see an empty seat at the Superbowl...

He noticed a woman sitting next to the empty seat and made a remark about it to her. "Well, it was my husband's", she said. "But he died." "Oh my gosh!" He said. "I'm sorry for your loss, but I'm surprised that another friend or family member didn't jump at the chance to take the ticket." "Beats me", she said. "They all insisted on going to the funeral."

What Do you call 20 Millionaires watching the Superbowl?

The Dallas Cowboys

Superbowl Killing It

Yeah go ravens. Ray lewis is litterly "killing" the other team. He is practicly "driving" through them. I think he is "drunk" with happiness.

What does a Bears fan do when his team wins the Superbowl?

He turns off his Xbox, and goes to bed.

Three guys meet in class after a superbowl sunday, still super hungover from the night before.

The first guy pipes up and says 'Fuck. i got so drunk last night I blew chunks.' The second guy cuts him off nearly immediately screaming 'oh yeah? I was so drunk I emptied my bank account at the strip club after. I have no money to pay rent now.' The third guy laughs at both of them and said 'that's nothing. I was so wasted last night, I sold my car to a homeless guy for 50 cents.' Finally the first guy cuts them both off. 'You guys don't understand.....Chunks is my girlfriends golden retriever.'

What do the Dallas Cowboys do when they win the Superbowl?

Turn off their Nintendo and go to bed.

What did Waldo say at the Superbowl?

I'm just here so I won't get find.

Katie Perry's halftime show

was the only time a Lion will be in the Superbowl!

Hey Seattle, wanna win the Superbowl?

"No thanks, we'll pass"

What do Philadelphia Eagles fans do after they win the superbowl?

Turn of madden and go to bed. (I'm an eagles fan)

Winner of the coin flip at Superbowl 50 announced earlier today.

Hilary Clinton has decided to receive.

Watching the Superbowl at a sober living with 7 sober drug addicts

"That's also what I need to do; get away from the sack."

Boom.

I asked my French friend if he watched superbowl...

...he said bowling is not so big in Europe.

I asked my friend why he wasn't excited for the superbowl yesterday

He shrugged and said "My parents don't care about football so neither do I."
I told him that's terrible reasoning and said "Well, what if your parents were morons?"
"Oh, then I'd be a football fan."

I have two tickets to the 2017 Superbowl, but I'm getting married that day so I can't go.

If you're interested in going in my place, the wedding is at St. Peter's church and her name is Laura.

Why does Cam Newton always take a bus to practice?

He can't finish a drive

(Yeah, late superbowl joke. I sowwie)

What does a Bills fan do when they win the superbowl?

He turns off his xbox.

What did the NFL Commissioner say when Adele turned down the Superbowl Halftime Show?

Never mind, I'll find someone like you

Hey Russell, You want another Superbowl????

Russell "Nah, I'll pass"

I'm curious what my vegetarian friend will bring to the superbowl party tonight.

Hopefully it's an apology.

Don't let this Superbowl distract you...

from the fact that the Warriors blew a 3-1 lead.

This was the most Superbowlly Super Bowl ever

*Super Bowl LI

They say history repeats itself...

But I never expected it to repeat itself so soon, let alone at the superbowl! I haven't seen a lead blown so bad since Hillary's 2016 Campaign!

Yo Momma so stupid...

She brought a spoon to the superbowl.

Adele requested and got a reset/restart on her song at the Grammy because she messed up

The Atlanta Falcons would also like to replay the 4th Quarter of the Superbowl

What does a cleveland Browns fan do after seeing them win the superbowl?

Turn of his xbox and go to bed.

We all know that today's eclipse was amazing,

but we can't forget the fact that the Falcons still blew a 25 point lead during the superbowl

What will you find in Superman's lavatory?

A Superbowl.

Shamelessly stolen from: The Joker -Justice League Action.
I was drunk and I thought this was funny.

How did the Catholic priest make one team lose the Superbowl?

He told the quarterback to do 20 hail Marys.

The biggest difference between the Superbowl and the Grammy's.

The Eagles have won a Grammy.

Stop hating on the Patriots!

There are kids that are young enough that haven't seen their last superbowl victory!

What did Tom Brady say when he lost the Superbowl?

Man, that Ertz...

It's a good thing Superbowl LII didn't go to overtime...

More than just the commercials would be Tide.

Tom Brady missed his opportunity to head into retirement with a Superbowl win. You could say...

He dropped the ball.

Was this whole Superbowl a Tide ad?

I've seen stranger things.

There's a lot of anger out there about the MLK speech/Dodge Ram Superbowl ad...

Kylie Jenner should hand out some Pepsi to calm things down.

I don't know why they spend so much money on Superbowl ads,

I still don't feel like buying any cars, eating any chips, drinking Budweiser or eating tide pods.

Watching the close score Superbowl with my father. Told him

What would you find in Superman's bathroom?

A Superbowl!

Trump makes peace with the NFL...

They've actually named this years superbowl in honor of his presidency....

Superbowl LIII

Job Opportunity for Flat Earthers

Because of the recent Arctic cold snap. Delta Airlines has been hiring de-icers in their Atlanta hub for the expected crowds at SuperBowl. Most of the jobs have been going to Flat Earthers, because by definition, they don't believe in *Global* Warming but are fine with Plane Warming.

Tom Brady's so old...

He won his first Superbowl in standard definition.

Superbowl LIII is the only superbowl I've seen where fans of both teams got along and agreed

That it was the worst superbowl ever

I don't mean to be rude, but the SuperBowl was boring.

No offense.

Why don't football players get hot during the superbowl?

Because the stadium is filled with fans.

The date for Superbowl 2020 has been announced as Sunday, February 2 ...

They haven't yet announced who the Patriots will be playing.

(Not OC) A man is sitting down in his seat at the Superbowl when he sees an empty seat beside him...

He turns to the man sitting one over and says "wow, it's amazing to see an empty seat at the Superbowl."

The seated man says "It's my wife's seat, she'd come with me every year to the Superbowl but she passed away and couldn't make it this year.

The other man responds "Jesus, I'm so sorry to hear and sorry for your loss. But surely you could have found someone, a cousin, a family friend or anything.."

The seated man says "I could, but they're all at her funeral."

Buddy bought Superbowl tickets

A good buddy of mine has 2 Super Bowl tickets, 40 yard line box seats 20 rows up. He paid $4,500 each but he didn't realize when he bought them, it was going to be on the same day as his wedding. Probably because of the extra game this year.

If you're interested, he's looking for someone to take his place...It's at Calvary church in San Clemente at 3pm. The bride's name is Nicole, she's 5'4", about 115 lbs, very flexible and a decent cook too.

She'll be in the white dress.

Last year a guy took his Blonde girl friend to the Superbowl

They had great seats right behind their team's bench.

After the game, he asked her how she liked it.

"Oh, I really liked it," she replied, "especially the

tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn't

understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents."

Dumbfounded, her boyfriend asked, "What do you

mean?"

"Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it, then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was...



'Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!'

I'm like...Helloooooo? It's only 25 cents!"

I wasn't surprised to see 50 Cent in the Superbowl Halftime show.

After all, two quarters equals 50 Cent.

There are 4 quarters in the Superbowl

And that's why they brought out 50 Cent at halftime.