Sunny Day Jokes
48 sunny day jokes and hilarious sunny day puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about sunny day that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.
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Funniest Sunny Day Short Jokes
Short sunny day jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The sunny day humour may include short sunny jokes also.
- Every day Sunny Leone creates history Every day sunny Leone creates history...
Then
we have to
go to
Settings
and
delete that
History. - My Egg died. He died last fry day. thank god he wasn't beaten.
Don't worry he went over easy.
He's now on the sunny side.
He's definitely in a better plate... - A drummer was standing outside of his car panicking because he accidentally locked his keys inside it. It was a very hot sunny day and the bassist was still inside the car.
- What do you call a dirty puddle on a slab of cold concrete in dim, gloomy light? A sunny day in Seattle.
- Why would you really want to win a game of beach volleyball on a hot and sunny day? Because defeat hurts.
- Warm, sunny day here in the mountains with lots of melting starting. I think the Icelandic have a word for this weather Dogturdsarethawen
- A weather girl walks into a chemist And buys an umbrella, a pair of sunglasses and a box of tampons.
She was expecting rain with sunny periods that day - How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? None, on a sunny day their light comes from the glass ceiling.
edit; missing words - Google Weather reported today is a cloudy day. But it is a clear sunny day. Something must have happened to Google clouds.
- I asked my dad if all Muslims could one day live in peace. He said "Sunni, that's Shia madness."
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Sunny Day One Liners
Which sunny day one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with sunny day? I can suggest the ones about sunshine and beautiful day.
- Why do trees seem suspicious on sunny days? Don't know they're just a bit shady.
- Sunny side up! Growing up I never knew what a sunrise was until one day it dawned on me.
- What do cats like to eat on sunny days? Micecream.
- What do you call Vladimir Putin after a horseback ride on a sunny day? Russian dressing
- What's the best beer for drinking on a sunny day? Natural Light.
- A grape threw a huge outdoor party on a hot, sunny day... It was raisin' the roof.
- What do we call of spill of the world's most abundant resource? A sunny day.
- Why can't midgets reach elevator b**... on a sunny day? No Umbrella.
- Saw an attractive Muslim girl the other day.... "Was she sunni?"
"Nah, s**...-ite"
Experience Good Cheer with Hilarious Sunny Day Jokes and Friends
What funny jokes about sunny day you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean raining day jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make sunny day pranks.
Sherlock Holmes and Doctor Watson are hiking.
They hiked all day long and then, having gotten tired, unpacked and quickly retired.
Holmes wakes up deep into the night, wakes Watson and says "Watson, do you see the bright stars and do you notice how clear the sky is? What can you deduce from it?"
Watson yawns and tries to play the game.
LWell, this clearly tells us the weather tomorrow is going to be dry and sunny."
"No, my friend. It’s much simpler than that. Someone has stolen our tent."
skipping church
Father Norton woke up Sunday morning and realizing it was an exceptionally
beautiful and sunny early spring day, decided he just had to play golf. So... he
told the Associate Pastor that he was feeling sick and persuaded him to say Mass
for him that day.
As soon as the Associate Pastor left the room, Father Norton headed out of town
to a golf course about forty miles away. This way he knew he wouldn't
accidentally meet anyone he knew from his parish. Setting up on the first tee,
he was alone. After all, it was Sunday morning and everyone else was in church!
At about this time, Saint Peter leaned over to the Lord while looking down from
the heavens and exclaimed "You're not going to let him get away with this, are
you?"
The Lord sighed, and said, "No, I guess not."
Just then Father Norton hit the ball and it shot straight towards the pin,
dropping just short of it, rolled up and fell into the hole.
IT WAS A 420 YARD HOLE IN ONE!
St. Peter was astonished. He looked at the Lord and asked, "Why did you let him do that?" The Lord smiled and replied, "Who's he going to tell?"
A guy goes to his local golf course...
The club pro asks him if he wants to try out one of their experimental new robot caddies...on the house.
"Sure, why not?" the man says.
He returns after playing 18 holes and raves to the club pro about the caddy. The robot gave him swing tips throughout the round and always chose the perfect club for each shot. It was the best round of his life!
He returns the next weekend and excitedly requests a robot caddy from the club pro.
"Unfortunately, we had to dispose of all seven of our robot caddies recently", said the club pro.
"What!?, why!?" exclaimed the man.
"Well, the chrome plating of the robots was very shiny and, on sunny days, it was distracting some of our older members", said the club pro.
"That's simple! Why didn't you just paint them black??" Screamed the man.
"We tried that", the club pro said. "Six of them didn't show up for work the next day and the seventh robbed the pro shop!"
Ever wonder why it rains one day, and is sunny on the next?
Because the world is "bipolar".
Two English Muslims go on holiday in Spain...
Two English Muslims go on a long holiday in Spain, and they're having a wonderful time until one day the weather turns and it rains for three days straight. On the fourth day, one of them looks out of the window in the morning.
"Ahmed, I think we can visit some of the local buildings today. We should bring an umbrella though."
"Ah, but Hissam, how is the weather looking on the forecast? Is it Sunni, or is it s**...'ite?"
Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go camping.
Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go camping. At about 3:30 in the morning Sherlock wakes up Watson and says to him:
"Look up into the sky, Watson, what do you see?"
Watson replies,"I see that it is very clear out, and that the moon is full."
"And what do you deduct from that, Watson?" Sherlock asks.
"I deduct that is is about 3:30 in the morning, and that tomorrow will be a clear, sunny day. tomorrow night the moon will begin to wane," Watson answered. Then he asked," what do you deduct from that, Sherlock?" Sherlock replied:
WATSON YOU IDIOT, SOMEONE HAS STOLEN OUR TENT!
A polar bear brings his car in to the mechanic
Mechanic tells him that it will be a few hours so the polar bear goes over to the supermarket and buys a bucket of vanilla ice cream. It's a hot sunny day and he goes over to the park bench to eat it. Then he wanders back to the garage. "Looks like you blew a seal," the mechanic says. "Oh no," the polar bear laughs, wiping his moth. "That's just ice cream."
What do cows drink joke
Say each of the questions aloud and then answer the final question.
What color are polar bears?
What color is cotton?
What color are clouds normally on a sunny day?
What color are marshmallows?
So what do cows drink?
Man Looking For A Sick Girl.
A man enters a store on a bright and sunny day looking for a girl called Lorraine. He asks the store owner if she is in today.
"No, she called in sick." The owner replied.
"Oh." The man continues. "Than can i have her number?"
"I wouldn't do that." The owner quickly says.
"Why?" The man asks in confusion.
"Well,"The owner quickly replies. "I wanna know, have you ever seen Lorraine, Comin' down on a sunny day?"
Two Italian men are deep sea fishing in the middle of the Mediterranean...
Vinny and Paulo were deep sea fishing on a bright sunny day when a World War II mine came floating along. Upon noticing this round spiky object coming nearer and nearer to the boat, Vinny shouted, "Paulo! It's a mine, it's a mine!!!"
Paulo replied, "Okay Vinny, you can-a have it!"
A shepherd and his dog
In a sunny day in the fields, there is a shepherd and his dog herding their sheep's.
The shepherd asked his dog to round up the sheep to the fields. The dog went out and started herding the sheep's to the field.
After a while the dog returned and told the shepherd that he already rounded up 20 sheep's on the field. The shepherd was a bit confused because he did not have that many sheep's so he head out to the fields and counted his sheep. The shepherd counted 15 sheep's and wondered why his dog said 20.
He approached his dog and asked "there is only 15 sheep's in the field. Why did you say there were 20?"
The dog turns toward the shepherd and said "i know, but i rounded them up"
Two old ladies, Sunny and Tina,
were outside their nursing home having a smoke, when it started to rain.
Tina pulled out a c**..., cut off the end, put it over her cigarette, and continued smoking.
Sunny: "What's that?"
Tina: "A c**...."
Sunny: "Where'd you get it?"
Tina: "You can get them at any chemist"
The next day, Sunny hobbled into the local chemist and announced to the pharmacist that she wanted to buy a pack of condoms.
The guy looked at her strangely (she was, after all, in her eighties), but politely asked what brand she preferred.
"Doesn't matter," she replied, "as long as it fits on a Camel."
The pharmacist fainted.
Sunny day with my gf.
I ask honey if I could borrow a newspaper.
"This is the 21st century," she said. We don't waste money on newspapers. Here, use my iPad."
She is right, I kill the son of b* in one shot.
I can tell you this. That fly never knew what hit him.
Bulls on a Parade
On a hot sunny day, I went to a record store. A song was playing on the speakers. Angrily, I picked up a hammer and started b**... the speaker system.
The confused owner asked, "What is this?"
I said, "Rage Against the Machine."
What do sheep do on a sunny day. Have a barbecue.
What do sheep do on a sunny day. Have a barbecue.
So this penguin's car breaks down...
...and he goes to the mechanic, and the mechanic says, Give me an hour, I'll figure out what the problem is.
And it's sunny and beautiful out, so the penguin has a little day for himself. He goes for a stroll, skips rocks by the lake, buys himself an ice cream.
He returns to the mechanic after an hour and the mechanic tells him, Good news! We figured out what's wrong with your car. It looks like you blew a seal.
The penguin looks up at him and says, Oh this? No it's just ice cream.
Guy runs into a bar
Guy runs into a bar around noon on a sunny day. He barrels his way towards the bar where no one but the bartender is around and says quick, give me ten shots of your best whiskey! Without skipping a beat, the bartender sets him with all ten shots lined up on the bar, and the guy hits them one after the other until he has all ten down his t**.... The bartender looks on astonished, and says man, why did you pound those away so fast? Guy says you'd drink that quickly too if you had what I've got! Bartender of course asks what does he have. Guy says five bucks...
I was driving with my daughter on a beautiful sunny day this winter and I said, "I can't believe how poor the visibility is."
She said, "What do you mean? It's perfectly clear." Pointing down I said, "I can only see four feet in front of us."
Three elderly ladies sitting on a park bench
Three very old ladies were sitting on a park bench together on a lovely sunny day when a f**... stopped at the end of their bench, faced them and exposed himself!
Well the old lady closest to him took a look and immediately had a s**...! Then the lady in the middle of the bench also looked then had a s**...! The last old lady at the end of the bench, poor love, couldn't reach that far.
My neighbour always seems to hang up his laundry on sunny days, but never on rainy days.
One day I decided to ask him how he always knew which days to hang his laundry.
"Well," he explained, "if I wake up and my wife is lying on her side, I know it's going to rain and I shouldn't hang my laundry. If I wake up and she's lying on her front, I know it's not going to rain and I should hang my laundry."
"That's a very interesting method," I replied, "but what if she's lying on her back?"
"Ah, those days," he said, "I have better things to do than laundry!"
I told my wife when I first met her that I play a LOT of golf
I told her …
If it's a beautiful sunny day I'm gonna play golf
If it's windy I'll play golf
If it's rainy I'll play golf
If we're in a minor car accident, I'll drop her off at the hospital and go play golf…
She said she's a hooker…
I said you're probably not holding the club right!
