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Sunglasses Jokes

110 sunglasses jokes and hilarious sunglasses puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about sunglasses that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

Looking for a reason to smile? Check out our collection of sunglasses jokes. From puns to one-liners, we've got jokes for every funny bone.

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Popular Sunglasses Short Jokes

Short sunglasses jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The sunglasses humour may include short lenses jokes also.

  1. Shark Tank *on shark Tank*
    Sharks: what's your idea?
    Me: ridiculously wide sunglasses
    Shark 1: I'm out
    Shark 2: I'm out as well
    Hammerhead shark: tell me more
  2. A son asked his dad "Can you pass me my sunglasses?"
    "Sure." Replied the dad. "Then can you pass me my dadglasses?"
  3. What does the sun and cleavage have in common? You can look at both for a second, but if want to stare you need to wear sunglasses.
  4. So my son asked me where his sunglasses are. I said
    "I don't know, where are my dadglasses?"
  5. My father always told me, he liked his women like he liked his sunglasses. Sitting on his face.
  6. Why did the snowflake bring sunglasses to the winter solstice party? To protect its "cool" factor.
  7. I don't know why women spend so much money on sunglasses... Wouldn't it be cheaper to just tint the kitchen windows!
  8. I don't like discussing sunglasses with other people.... I find it to be a very polarizing subject
  9. Looking at cleavage is like looking at the sun. You look, you get a sense of it, and you look away. AND you can look longer with sunglasses!
  10. Why can't pirates wear sunglasses? Because they have no buccaneers!
    Happy speak like a pirate day!

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Sunglasses One Liners

Which sunglasses one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with sunglasses? I can suggest the ones about eye glass and sunscreen.

  1. Hey Dad, have you seen my sunglasses? No son, have you seen my dad glasses?
  2. How to be cool A) Use happy sunglasses emoji
    B)
  3. What kind of sunglasses does Ned Flanders wear? Oakley Dokelys
  4. What sunglasses does Ned Flanders wear? Oakley Doakleys
  5. Dad, will you hand me my sunglasses? "As soon as you hand me my dadglasses, Son."
  6. How to be cool: A) Make the sunglasses face
    B)
  7. If only Steve Irwin wore sunglasses They might have protected him from harmful rays
  8. Steps to being cool A) Use the sunglasses face
    B)
  9. What does the sun drink out of? Sunglasses.
  10. I don't like sunglasses They're shady
  11. Why do the FBI always wear sunglasses? To protect their FB-eyes
  12. How to become cool A) Put on sunglasses
    B)
  13. What is brown, hairy and wears sunglasses? A coconut on vacation.
  14. I sweat less when I wear sunglasses ... Because I feel cooler
  15. Bought A Pair Of Polarized Sunglasses Some people like 'em, some people hate 'em.

Sunglasses Day Jokes

Here is a list of funny sunglasses day jokes and even better sunglasses day puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • Saw a guy wearing sunglasses on a cloudy day Wasn't that bright
  • A weather girl walks into a chemist And buys an umbrella, a pair of sunglasses and a box of tampons.
    She was expecting rain with sunny periods that day
  • During my school days, my teachers always used to wear sunglasses I was such a Bright student.

Polarized Sunglasses Jokes

Here is a list of funny polarized sunglasses jokes and even better polarized sunglasses puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I like my sunglasses like I like my politicians, Polarized and able to be bought surprisingly cheap.
  • I saw someone wearing sunglasses indoors today and asked him why he does it. He gave a good explanation but I felt his viewpoint was too polarized for me.
  • Broke my good sunglasses... But instead of buying new ones, I'm just gonna put Trump pictures where the lenses used to be. He seems to be far more polarizing than my Costas ever were.
  • I bought a new pair of polarizing sunglasses and was asking my friends what they thought of them. They seemed to either love them or hate them.
  • Why can't sunglasses have political opinions? Because they're so polarizing
Sunglasses joke, Why can't sunglasses have political opinions?

Sunglasses joke, Why can't sunglasses have political opinions?

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about sunglasses can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of sunglasses puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Hilarious Sunglasses Jokes for a Fun-Filled Night with Friends

What funny jokes about sunglasses you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean wearing glasses jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make sunglasses prank.

Why did the summer school teacher wear sunglasses? Because her class was so bright!

A man in Texas is driving with twenty penguins in the bed of his pickup…

…when he is stopped by a State Trooper. The trooper approaches and tells the man that he needs to take the penguins to the zoo immediately as they are non-native and not registered to the man as pets. Right away, officer, replies the man, and off he goes.
The following day, the same man is driving on the same road with the same twenty penguins in the bed of his truck. This time, however, the penguins are all wearing sunglasses and straw hats. Sure enough, the man is stopped by the same officer. After pulling the man over, the officer approaches.
What is the meaning of this? I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo yesterday, why are they still in the bed of your truck? Did you really think these disguises would fool me?
They're not disguises, officer, you see I DID take them to the zoo yesterday—in fact, we had so much fun, we're going to the beach today.

Blonde Inventions

The water-proof towel
Glow in the dark sunglasses
Solar powered flashlight
Submarine screen door
A book on how to read
Inflatable dart board
A dictionary index
Powdered water
Pedal powered wheel chair
Water proof tea bags
Zero proof alcohol
Reusable ice cubes
Skinless bananas
Do it yourself roadmap

Blind pilots

A plane is preparing for takeoff with a full load of passengers when the pilot and copilot board--both with dark sunglasses and tapping walking sticks for guidance. The passengers are understandably uncomfortable, but assume it must be some sort of practical joke, so they say nothing.
As the plane begins to accelerate, the passengers see the end of the runway rapidly approaching, with certain doom awaiting at the end if the pilots really can't see what they're doing. Just before the end of the runway, all the passengers scream together--right before the plane lifts off. They're a little upset, but relieved that the pilots aren't really blind.
In the cockpit, the pilot turned to his copilot and remarked: "you know, Lou, one of these days they're not going to scream in time, and then we'll be in real trouble!"

Did you hear the one about the umbrella in the trench coat and sunglasses?

He was looking shady.

Son: Where are my sunglasses?

Son: Where are my sunglasses?
Father: I don't know...where are my dadglasses?

Wearing sunglasses makes you look

(⌐■_■)
*Shady.*

What did the arrogant sunglasses say to the nose?

"I'm above you."

What's the difference between a blonde and a pair of sunglasses?

The sunglasses sit higher on your face.

I just bought sunglasses off of the black market

The trade was very shady.

How to be cool:

A) Use the cool sunglasses emoticon
B)

Did you hear about the sunglasses theif?

He was pretty shady.

If blind people wear sunglasses...

Why don't deaf people wear ear muffs?

When I took off my sunglasses, my roommate said, "I thought you had blue eyes."

I replied, "Must have left them in my other genes"

The smoothest man on Earth bought a meal in a breakfast joint and asked his beautiful waitress "May I please have the Sussex Cakes ..."

(*lowers sunglasses*)
" ... without the *sus*?"

My son asked me to hand him his sunglasses.

I said 'You never told me you had a son named glasses!'

The only problem I have with transition lenses is...

I can't wear my sunglasses at night.

What do you call a skinny man in sunglasses?

Slim Shady.

I decided to watch the eclipse with only sunglasses, in spite of all the warnings.

I honestly can't see what all the fuss was about.

What's the difference between a flying mammal in sunglasses and a mouse in disguise?

One's a rad bat, the other's a bad rat

I saw a guy put on two pairs of sunglasses.

He looked pretty shady.

A man was pulled over...

A man was pulled over, and the officer noticed a group of penguins in the backseat.
Officer: You need to take those penguins to the zoo.
Man: Ok, I will.
The next day the man was pulled over by the officer and he notices the same group of penguins in the backseat but they all had sunglasses on.
Officer: I thought I told you to take those penguins to the zoo.
Man: I did. Today we're going to the beach.

My friend Craig got me those sunglasses for colourblind people; yesterday I saw colour for the first time.

Turns out, Craig is black.

How to be cool

A)Sunglass emojis
B)
I hope that helps

I looked up at the multicoloured sky, where sandals and sunglasses floated above everything. Then I couldn't stop myself, and I broke out into song.

"Summer wear over the rainbow."

Was in line at the bank today

When a man walked in wearing sunglasses and holding a white and red walking stick, demanding all our money.
He was robbing us blind!

What sunglasses can see inside your eyes?

X-Ray Bans

I hate when companies get orders wrong

So when I ordered blue tinted sunglasses and got the wrong color, I was seeing red.

A young sales clerk removed an old mans sunglasses and insisted he tries on a new pair.

"I can't see myself wearing these" said the old man.
"Why not?" asked the clerk.
"Because I'm blind".

I have a plan...

A) emoticon puns and sunglasses
B)

Meanwhile on Shark Tank...

me: ridiculously wide sunglasses
shark 1: i'm out
shark 2: i'm out
hammerhead shark: i'm listening

A blonde went to the appliance store sale and found a bargain

"I would like to buy this TV," she told the salesman.
"Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied.
She hurried home and dyed her hair, then came back and again told the salesman "I would like to buy this TV."
"Sorry, we don't sell to blondes."
"Darn, he recognized me," she thought. She went for a complete disguise this time; haircut and new color, new outfit, big sunglasses, then waited a few days before she again approached the salesman.
"I would like to buy this TV."
"Sorry, we don't sell to blondes."
Frustrated, she exclaimed, "How do you know I'm a blonde?"
"Because that's a microwave."

"Hey Dad, have you seen my sunglasses?"

"Nope. Have you seen my dad glasses?"
It wasn't worth it to ask him if he had any sunscreen...

A man was driving down the road when a policeman stopped him. The officer looked in the back of the man's truck and said, Why are these penguins in your truck?

The man replied, These are my penguins. They belong to me.
You need to take them to the zoo, the policeman said.
The next day, the officer saw the same guy driving down the road. He pulled him over again. He saw the penguins were still in the truck, but they were wearing sunglasses this time. I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo! the officer said.
I did, the man replied. And today I'm taking them to the beach.

Girl, I want to wear you like a pair of sunglasses...

One leg over each ear...

What did the zoo keeper say when he saw the elephant wearing sunglasses?

nothing, he didn't recognise him

b**... are like the sun.

You can stare at em longer if you're wearing sunglasses.

A blind man walks into a shop with a chihuahua...

wearing black sunglasses and a walking cane.
A shop assistant comes over and says "sorry sir, but we don't allow dogs in here".
The man replies, "but this is my guide dog!".
"Oh.." says the shop assistant, "I thought they were meant to be labradors?"
The man says "oh god, what have I got!"

Saturday afternoon

I was sitting in my lawn chair, drinking beer and watching my pregnant wife mow the lawn. The neighbor lady from
across the street was so outraged that she came over and shouted at me:
"You should be hung."
I took a drink from Corona, wiped the cold foam from my lips, lifted my darkened sunglasses and stared directly at this nosey neighbor and then calmly replied:
"I am, that's why she cuts the grass."

Given social distancing regulations, a ton of condiment companies are being forced to cancel July 4th campaigns like sponsored concerts, where they planned to hand out signature color sunglasses to attendees.

Bad idea, Heinz-Sight 2020.

A guy in a Canadian city wants to get hammered.

He goes up to the local pub with a strong man blocking his way.
"I want to drink the night away!"
The muscular guard takes off his sunglasses and says,
"What would you do for a Klondike bar?"

Went to the optometrist office today and bumped into an old friend!

I also bumped into the optometrist, the receptionist and I knocked over their sunglasses display.

A man named Jeff was driving down the road when a policeman stopped him.

The officer looked in the back of Jeff's truck and said, Why are these penguins in your truck?

Jeff replied, These are my penguins. They belong to me.

You need to take them to the zoo, the policeman said.

The next day, the officer saw Jeff driving down the road once again. He pulled him over again. He saw the penguins were still in the truck, but they were wearing sunglasses this time. I thought I told you to take these penguins to the zoo! the officer said.

I did, Jeff replied. And today I'm taking them to the beach."

How come Voldemort hates the sun?

Because his sunglasses won't stay up

A pair of sunglasses and a set of jumper cables were lined up waiting to get into a nightclub.....

The bouncer was letting everybody in front of them in but when they get to the velvet rope the bouncer says: Sorry fellas, I can't let you in.
Feeling dejected the sunglasses said Why not?
The bouncer replies Well for a start, you're off your head and your mate here looks like he could start something.

Why was the teacher wearing sunglasses?

She had bright students!

One day a truck driver had a truck full of squirrels. A police officer said," Sir, I'm going to need you to take these squirrels to the zoo."

The driver did so and left. The next day the driver was back but this time the squirrels were wearing sunglasses. The officer said," I thought I told you to take these squirrels to the zoo." The driver said," I did. Today I'm taking them to the beach."

What is the best Three-Piece Swimsiut?

Hat, sunglasses and slippers

A group of tourists in Africa where enjoying a guided tour….

A group of tourists in Africa were enjoying a tour of the bush observing the wild life. The guide says to everyone , Don't be surprised if you see an elephant wearing sunglasses.
One of the tourists asks-
why would an elephant be wearing sunglasses?
The guide replies- "Well, they do this to so they can go unnoticed at the beach."
The tourist then said- That's ridiculous!! My hotel is right on the beach and I've never seen an elephant."
The guide replies-

"I guess it works."

I always wear sunglasses while I'm teaching

because my students are too bright.

What does Bruce Willis, a donkey with sunglasses on, and my ex have in common?

They're all bad a**....

Did you hear about the guy who wore sunglasses at night and fell into a hole in the ground?

He couldn't see that well.

My son asked: "Dad, have you seen my sunglasses?"

I replied: "No son, have you seen my dad glasses?"

b**... are like the sun

If you wear sunglasses you can stare at them longer.
(I don't know if this has already been posted here before, sorry if it has)

Sunglasses joke, b**... are like the sun

jokes about sunglasses

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these sunglasses jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.