The Best 49 Sunday School Jokes

Following is our collection of funny Sunday School jokes. There are some sunday school enroll jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.

Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. We hope you will find these sunday school end of school year puns funny enough to tell and make people laugh.

Top 10 of the Funniest Sunday School Jokes and Puns

The Sunday School Teacher asks, “Now, Johnny, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating?”

“No sir,” Little Johnny replies, “I don’t have to, my mom is a good cook!”

Chuck Norris bunked school one day.

Till today that day is known as Sunday.

After Sunday school, the teacher released the kids to go to church and reminded them, "

You all know to be very nice and quiet in the church. And why is that?" 

Little Johnny offers, "Miss, it's so we wouldn't wake all those people sleeping."

Sunday School joke

Sunday school teacher asks Johnny, "

Come now, Little Johnny, tell me the truth, do you say your prayers before eating?"

Little Johnny smiles proudly, "No Miss, there's no need, my mom cooks really well."

Who knows where Jesus is?

A Sunday School teacher was concerned that his students might be a little confused about Jesus Christ because of the Christmas season emphasis on His birth. He wanted to make sure they understood that the birth of Jesus occurred a long time ago, that He grew up, etc. So he asked his class, "Where is Jesus today?"

Steven raised his hand and said, "He's in heaven."

Mary was called on and answered, "He's in my heart."

Little Johnny, waving his hand furiously, blurted out, "I know! I know! He's in our bathroom!!!"

The whole class got very quiet, looked at the teacher, and waited for a response. The teacher was completely at a loss for a few very long seconds. He finally gathered his wits and asked Little Johnny how he knew this.

And Little Johnny said, "Well...every morning, my father gets up, bangs on the bathroom door, and yells 'Jesus Christ, are you still in there?'!"


A mid 30's guy is grocery shopping, and a 20 something blonde catches his eye.

She looks very familiar, but he can't remember where he met her. When they moved closer, she said to him, "Hi - I think you're the father of one of my children."

The guy freaks out. He says, "I've only cheated on my wife 3 times - in Vegas 5 years ago, in Orlando 4 years ago, and in Seattle 3 years ago. You look familiar, but I just can't remember. Who are you?"

She says, "I'm your son's Sunday school teacher."

Little kid in sunday school

the teacher is asking the 5 year olds questions, and asks one specific question to little Suzie; "And why is it important for us to be quiet when we're listening to the sermon, Suzie?" To which she replied, "because the old people are sleeping."

Sunday School joke, Little kid in sunday school

What's Resurrection?

There was a man teaching the children's Sunday school class, and his lesson was on resurrection. The man asks the kids if they know what the word resurrection means.

After a long silence a little boy in the back of the room raises his hand and says "Well I don't know what it is but I know that if it lasts more than 4 hours, you have to go see a doctor."

The Vicar's Salary

At Sunday church the local Vicar explains that he must move on to
a larger congregation that will pay him more.
There is a hush within the congregation.

No one wants him to leave because he is so popular.

Fred Smith, who owns several car dealerships in Glasgow, stands up and
proclaims:
'If the Vicar stays, I will provide him with a new Mercedes every
year, and his wife with a Volkswagen mini-van to transport their
children!'

The congregation sighs in appreciation and applauds.

Sam Brown, a successful entrepreneur and publican, stands and says, if
the Vicar will stay on here, I'll personally double his salary
and establish a foundation to guarantee private secondary school
education for all of his children!'

More sighs and loud applause.

Agnes Jones, age 88, stands and announces with a smile,
'If the Vicar stays, I will give him free sex.'

There is total silence.

The Preacher, blushing, asks her:
'Mrs. Jones, you're a wonderful and holy lady, whatever possessed you
to say that?'

Agnes's 90-year old husband, Joe, is now trying to hide, holding his
forehead with the palm of his hand and shaking
his head from side to side, while his wife replies:
'Well, I just asked my husband how we could help, and he said, 'Fuck him'.

How do you get out of Sunday school?

You tell your mom you're Sikh.

Mr Sugarbrown's daughter?

A little girl, when asked her name, would reply, "I'm Mr.
Sugarbrown's daughter." Her mother told her this was wrong, she must say,"I'm Janey Sugarbrown." The Vicar spoke to her in Sunday School, and said,"Aren't you Mr.
Sugarbrown's daughter?" With her mother standing just a few feet away, the little girl replied, "I thought I was, but Mommy says I'm not."

You can explore sunday school son reddit one liners, including funnies and gags. Read them and you will understand what jokes are funny? Those of you who have teens can tell them clean sunday school sundays dad jokes. There are also sunday school puns for kids, 5 year olds, boys and girls.


A Sunday School Teacher . . .

A Sunday School Teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds.

After explaining the commandment to "Honor" thy Father and thy Mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"

Without missing a beat, one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill."

Just heard this on the radio. May the censors have mercy on their soul. [NSFW]

On a Sunday school, the teacher asks the class: "Class, what body party goes to heaven first?"

One kid answers, "It's the feet!"

"Why is it the feet?" the confused teacher asks.

The kid replies, "Because last night I found Mommy with her feet in the air screaming 'Oh God yes...heaven...I'm coming!' "

Susan taught all the toddlers a new song during Sunday school.

While learning "Must Jesus Bear the Cross Alone", the children stumbled when coming to the line "The consecrated cross I'll bear." After a bit of practice, everyone seemed to have gotten the hang of it and class was let out.

The following Sunday, a concerned mother came up to Susan and asked why her daughter was so focused on a constipated, cross-eyed bear.

Father and son in supermarket. "Dad, what are these?"

"That's a 3pack of condoms son for secondary school lads. 1 for Friday night, 1 for Saturday night and 1 for Sunday night."

"What about the 6pack dad?"

"Those are for University lads. 2 for Friday night, 2 for Satuday night and 2 for Sunday night."

"Well dad, what about the 12pack then?"

"Married men son. 1 for January, 1 for February, 1 for March ..."

Resurrection day

Children at Sunday school were asked what resurrection meant. One boy replied, "I know that if you have a resurrection that lasts for more than 4 hours you should call a doctor." Happy Easter!

Sunday School joke, Resurrection day

Little Johnny... Finding Jesus

A Sunday school teacher is concerned that his students might be a little confused about Jesus, so he asks his class, "Where is Jesus today?"

Steven raises his hand and says, "He's in Heaven."

Mary answers, "He's in my heart."

Little Johnny waves his hand furiously and blurts out, "He's in our bathroom!"

The surprised teacher asks Little Johnny how he knows this.

"Well," Little Johnny says, "every morning, my father gets up, bangs on the bathroom door and yells 'Jesus Christ, are you still in there?!'"

Little Johnny at the playground

Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, Ms. Smith stopped to gently reprimand the child. Smiling sweetly, the Sunday school teacher said, "Johnny, when I was a little girl, I was told if that I made ugly faces, it would freeze and I would stay like that." Little Johnny looked up and replied, "Well, Ms Smith, you can't say you weren't warned."

Most guys experiment with homosexuality in college...

I experimented in Sunday School


How do you get into Heaven?

When Tim was just a wee lad, he went regularly to Sunday School. One day, his teacher decided to test Tim to see if he understood the concept of getting to Heaven. She asked him, "If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the church, Would that get me into Heaven?"

"NO!" Tim answered.

"If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the yard, and kept everything neat and tidy, would that get me into Heaven?"

Again, the answer was, "NO!"

By now, the teacher was starting to smile. Hey, this was fun!

"Well, then, if I was kind to animals and gave candy to all the children, and loved my husband, would that get me into Heaven?"

Again, Tim answered, "NO!"

The Sunday School teacher was just bursting with pride for him.

Well, she continued, "then how can I get into Heaven?"

A very confident young Tim shouted out, "YOU GOTTA BE DEAD."

Why don't most people have classes on Saturday or Sunday?

School is for the week.

A Sunday school teacher asked the children

just
before she dismissed them to go to church, "And why is
it necessary to be quiet in church?"
Annie replied, "Because people are sleeping"

Oh God, I am coming

During a group discussion at Sunday school, a nun asks the children what they think God takes you by when you die.

A kid responds, "I think God takes you by your feet, because once I walked into my parents room and my mom's feet were in the air and she was screaming, "Oh God, I'm coming!!!

Selling Condoms

An 18-yr-old starts work as a pharmacist's assistant. The pharmacist is showing the new kid around the aisles when they stop at the condom display and the kid asks why they come in different quantities per package.

The pharmacist tells the noob that the 3-packs are for high school guy, who gets it on once on Friday night, once on Saturday and once on Sunday.
The 6-packs are for the more-experienced college guys, who do it twice each on Friday night, Saturday and Sunday.

So the kid says, "what about these 12-packs?"

The pharmacist replies "the 12-packs are for the guys who've been married for a long time - January, February, March..."

My Sunday School teacher is so old...

.. when the New Testament came out she said "I don't care for the new curriculum."

The Pope is teaching a Sunday school class

"Children" begins the Pope. "Where's Jesus today?"

Little Tommy says: "He's in my heart."

Little Barry says: "He's in Heaven."

Little Davey says: "He's in our bathroom."

The surprised Pope asks Little Davey how he knows this.

"Well," says Little Davey, "every day my Dad bangs on our bathroom door and yells 'Jesus Christ, are you still in there?"

Little Johnny

A teacher in Sunday school once asked Little Johnny, "Johnny, do you believe in the Devil?"

"No," said Little Johnny knowledgeably. "It's just like with Santa Claus. I know it's really my dad."

Who went to Mount Olive?

A Sunday School teacher asks "Who went to Mount Olive?"
From the back of the class, a voice responds, "Popeye!"

Class Teacher

At a Sunday school class the teacher asked a child; do you pray to God before lunch or dinner?
The child said, No ma'am, my moms a good cook!

In Sunday School, they said God and Jesus were everywhere, in everything.

This takes,"Jesus loves you" to a whole new level.

Ugly Faces

Finding one of her students making faces at others on the playground, Ms. Smith stopped to have a talk with the child. Smiling sweetly, the Sunday School teacher said, "Johnny, when I was a child, I was told if that I made ugly faces, it would freeze and I would stay like that." Johnny looked up and replied, "Well, Ms Smith, you can't say you weren't warned."

How to get to heaven

A Sunday school teacher asked her class the question how do we get to heaven?
She then asked, Can I be nice to my neighbors and go to church every Sunday and get into heaven?
The class replied, No.
She said, Okay, can I keep my house clean and help the poor then get into heaven?
The class again replied, No.
She asked, Then how do we get to heaven?
A boy stood up a said, You need to be dead!

Jail Time

My daughter hates school.
One weekend she cried and fretted and tried every excuse not to go back on Monday.
Sunday morning on the way home from brunch, the crying, and whining built to a crescendo.
At the end of my rope, I finally stopped the car and explained, Honey, it's a law. If you don't go to school, they'll put Daddy in jail.
She looked at me, thought a moment, then asked, How long would you have to stay?

Which student in the universe has the most absents on record at Sunday School?

Jesus Christ, I don't know him..

Where does a Christian ice cream go during Sunday?

To a sundae school.

A kid asks the Sunday school teacher which part of the body goes to Heaven first. The teacher decides to make it a lesson and asks the kids what they think.

Sarah says 'it's your brain, because that's what controls everything'

Tina says 'it's your heart, because that's where Jesus lives'

Johnny yells out 'your feet!'

The teacher asks why the feet.

Johnny replies 'because I looked in Mrs Brown's bedroom window this morning and she had her feet in the air screaming 'Jesus! I'm coming!'

A nun in sunday school asks a girl what she wants to be when she grows up

"A prostitute!" she says.

The nun is appalled.

"young lady, WHAT did you say?!"

the girl replies "A prostitute".

the nun lets out a sigh of relief

"oh thank goodness, I thought you said 'protestant"!

A Sunday school teacher was teaching her first-grade class.

"Class," she said, "what were the first words Jesus said when he walked out of the tomb on Easter morning?"

A little girl waved her hand excitedly. "Ooh! Ooh! I know!" she said. "Pick me! Pick me!"

The teach smiled and said, "All right, Susie. What did Jesus say when he walked out of the tomb?"

Susie stood up proudly. "He said, 'TAH-DAH!'"

A Sunday school teacher ask the children, "why is it necessary to be quite in church?"

The children replied, "because people are sleeping."

The Sunday School teacher was explaining Sodom and Gomorrah.

TEACHER: "And God told Lot to take his wife and flee out of the city, but not to look back. But Lot's wife looked back, and turned into a pillar of salt."

The children were obviously shocked. One tentatively raised his hand.

TEACHER: "Yes, Billy?"

BILLY: "But what happened to the flea?"

Last Dad Joke of the day for me

Two boys are walking home from Sunday School after hearing some strong preaching about the devil.

One says to the other, "What do you think about all this Satan stuff"?

The other says "Well you know how Santa turned out to be, it's probably just your Dad".

John was at Sunday School. This particular lesson, they were teaching how God created everything, including human beings.

Little John listened intently as they explained how Eve was created out of one of Adam's ribs.

Later in the week his mother noticed him lying as though he was ill, and asked: John what is the matter, are you feeling okay?

Little John responded: I have a pain in my side. I think I'm going to have a wife!

So a Sunday School teacher asks her class where Jesus is.

Little Susie says, In Heaven!

Little Amy says, In my heart!

Little Johnny says, In my bathroom!

Perplexed, the Sunday School teacher asks little Johnny why Jesus would be in his bathroom.

I don't know, I just hear my dad every morning banging on the bathroom door and yelling 'Jesus Christ are you still in there?!'

A Sunday school teacher asked her children on the way to service

A Sunday school teacher asked her children on the way to service, "And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?" One little girl replied, "Because people are sleeping."

On their first date, a man asked his companion if she'd like a drink with dinner.

"Oh, no, what would I tell my Sunday school class?" she said.
Later, he offered her a cigarette. "Oh, no, what would I tell my Sunday school class?" she said again.
On the drive home, he saw a motel. Figuring he had nothing to lose, he asked if she wanted to stop in there.
"Okay," his date replied.
"What will you tell your Sunday school class?" he asked, shocked.
"The same thing I always tell them. 'You don't have to drink or smoke to have a good time.'"

A little girl in her Sunday best was running...

A little girl in her Sunday best was running as fast as she could to get to Sunday school on time. As she ran she prayed, "Dear Lord, please don't let me be late. Dear Lord, please don't let me be late." At that moment she tripped and fell getting her clothes all dirty. She got up, brushed herself off and started running again, praying... "Dear Lord, please don't let me be late, but don't shove me anymore!"

4 kids are at a party on sunday night

They wake up on Monday morning, and knowing they wouldn't be back in time to take a test, they emailed the professor and told him that they had a flat tire. The professor responded ok, you can take the test tomorrow

The next day the kids are at school. The professor says you all have to take the test in separate rooms

Fair the kids responded.

The first question was worth 5 points and said what is 5+5 .

Easy enough said one of the kids in their test room.

The second question was worth 95 points. It said which tire was flat

When I was just a little kid, I used to pray for a bicycle. Then as I grew older I learned in Sunday school, that's not how prayer works.

So I stole a bike...and prayed for forgiveness.

Who wants to go to heaven?

My wife used to teach Sunday school to 7 year olds,so in one of her classes,she asked the class,"Who wants to go to heaven"?Everyone raised their hand except this one cute little girl,so my wife asked her,"Why don't you want to go to heaven my angel"?
The little girl replied,
My mother told me that I must come home straight after Sunday school.

Just think that there are jokes based on truth that can bring down governments, or jokes which make girl laugh. Many of the sunday school elementary school jokes and puns are jokes supposed to be funny, but some can be offensive. When jokes go too far, are mean or racist, we try to silence them and it will be great if you give us feedback every time when a joke become bullying and inappropriate.

We suggest to use only working sunday school end of school piadas for adults and blagues for friends. Some of the dirty witze and dark jokes are funny, but use them with caution in real life. Try to remember funny jokes you've never heard to tell your friends and will make you laugh.

Joko Jokes