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Sumo Jokes

55 sumo jokes and hilarious sumo puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about sumo that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

This article explores the comedic potential of sumo deadlifts and the math jokes of samurais. Don't miss out on the subtraction and triggernometry puns sure to have you rolling in laughter!

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Funniest Sumo Short Jokes

Short sumo jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The sumo humour may include short supper jokes also.

  1. Why have sumo wrestlers began shaving their legs? They were getting tired of being mistaken for feminists
  2. Why is it common practice for sumo wrestlers to shave? So they don't get mistaken for a feminist
  3. Why do Sumo wrestlers shave their legs? Because if they didn't, people would mistake them for feminists.
  4. A Japanese prison invited a few sumo wrestlers for a match... The fattest prisoners were selected to compete and to everyone's surprise they won.
    It's because the cons outweigh the pros.
  5. Why do sumo wrestlers avoid skydiving? Because a fat man falling to Japan is a bad idea
  6. A sumo wrestler once came to visit, and ended up sleeping on my couch for a month! It left a negative impression.
  7. I'll have you know that I have the body of an athlete! And by athlete, I mean a sumo wrestler...
  8. Why are there so many Sumo wrestlers in Japan? Because the last time there was a little boy in Japan, half the population was wiped out.
  9. A boy is asking santa for a heavy sweater for christmas present so santa send him a sumo wrestler
  10. A scary thing to do to your girlfriend on Halloween... is ask her if she's going as a sumo wrestler.
    Spooky!

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Sumo One Liners

Which sumo one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with sumo? I can suggest the ones about dim sum and possum.

  1. Why do sumo wrestlers shave their leg? To avoid being mistaken for feminists.
  2. Why do sumo wrestles shave their legs? So that you can tell them apart from feminists
  3. Why do sumo wrestlers shave their legs? So people don't confuse them with feminists.
  4. Why do sumo wrestlers shave? Because they dont want to be confused with feminists.
  5. What do fat Japanese lawyers do when business is slow? They sumo people.
  6. How much does a Sumo Wrestler weigh? Won ton.
  7. Why do sumo wrestlers shave? So they don't get mistaken for feminists
  8. Why do Sumo Wrestler's shave their bodies? So that they don't get mistaken for feminists
  9. Who has the largest pupils? A sumo instructor.
  10. Why did sumo wrestlers start shaving their legs? To stop getting confused as feminists
  11. Why do sumo wrestlers shave their legs? So they're not confused with feminist.
    Sorry.
  12. How can you tell a Sumo wrestler from a feminist? A Sumo wrestler shaves his legs.
  13. What did the Chinese cannibals make out of the Sumo wrestler they killed? Wonton soup.
  14. What is Sunday & Monday's favorite sport? SuMo Wrestling
  15. Why are sumo wrestlers so effective at conflict resolutions? They're meaty asians.

Sumo Wrestlers Jokes

Here is a list of funny sumo wrestlers jokes and even better sumo wrestlers puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • What's the scariest part of a sumo wrestler skydiving? Looking up and seeing another Fat Man
  • Do you know why sumo wrestlers shave their legs? So people wouldn't get them mixed up with feminists.
  • In Japan, finding a sumo wrestler means finding someone who's been on a high calorie diet for many years... In America, there's (at least) one in a Walmart near you!
  • Why do sumo wrestlers shave their legs? Because they don't want to be mistaken as feminists.
  • How can you tell a sumo wrestler from a feminist?
    A Sumo wrestler shaves his legs.
  • What do you call a sumo wrestler's gaze? The thousand lard stare
  • Why do sumo wrestlers shave their legs? So they don't get mistaken for feminists.
    (heard this on pka 250 from w**..., thought it was funny so I shared it here)

Sumo Wrestling Jokes

Here is a list of funny sumo wrestling jokes and even better sumo wrestling puns that will make you laugh with friends.

  • I heard your mom won a gold medal! I didn't even know they had sumo wrestling at the Olympics!
  • Yo mamma is so fat that when she showed up to watch a sumo wrestling tournament, they gave her the trophy.
  • Did you hear the Japanese sumo wrestling team lost to a group of prison inmates? I guess the cons outweighed the pros.
  • I asked one of my sumo-wrestling friends whether he wanted some sushi for dinner He just replied "No thanks, I'm not a big Japanese guy"
  • This fat guy came up to me and said "do you want to fight!" I said no in not into sumo wrestling.
Sumo joke, This fat guy came up to me and said "do you want to fight!"

Sumo joke, This fat guy came up to me and said "do you want to fight!"

Silly & Ridiculous Sumo Jokes to Spread Joy & Laughter

What funny jokes about sumo you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean supreme jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make sumo pranks.

Japanese Banking Crisis

Uncertainty has hit the Japanese banking industry.

In the past week, Origami bank has folded, Sumo bank has gone belly up and Bonsai bank announced plans to cut some of its branches.

Last week it was announced that Karaoke bank is up for sale and will likely go for a song while shares in Kamikaze bank were suspended after they nosedived.

Samurai bank is soldiering on following sharp cutbacks, Ninja bank is reported to have taken a hit, but it remains in the black.

Furthermore 500 staff at Karate bank got the chop and analysts report there is something fishy going on at Sushi bank where it's feared staff may get a raw deal.

Financial collapse in Japan

Origami Bank has folded.
Sumo Bank has gone belly up.
Bonsai Bank has had to cut back some of its branches.
Karaoke Bank has been put up for sale and is going for a song.
There's something fishy going on at Sushi Bank...shareholders are afraid they might get a raw deal.
Kamikaze Bank shares have nose-dived.
500 jobs at Karate Bank have been chopped.

Japanese banks

The recent tsunami in Japan has badly affected the banking sector.
Origami bank has folded.
Sumo bank has gone belly up.
Bonsai bank has cut back some of its branches.
Karaoke bank has been put up for sale and is going for a song.
Analysts report that there is something fishy going on at Sushi Bank and staff there fear they may get a raw deal.
Meanwhile, shares in Kamikaze Bank have nose-dived and 500 jobs at Karate Bank will be chopped.

"Dress for the job you want, not the job you have." --career advancement program at my job

Then they fired me for violating the dress code at the bank. Hypocrites. How am I ever going to become a sumo wrestler now?

Did you hear about the sumo match happening at the prison tomorrow?

They're going to bring in professional sumo wrestlers and pit them against the fattest inmates but honestly I don't even know if the pros outweigh the cons.

Sumo joke, What's the scariest part of a sumo wrestler skydiving?