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Summons Jokes

30 summons jokes and hilarious summons puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about summons that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Summons Short Jokes

Short summons jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The summons humour may include short summoned jokes also.

  1. Why can't Karens get anything done on a Windows computer? They keep summoning the Task Manager
    (Sorry: this came to my mind as I was getting frustrated with my slow computer)
  2. Ryan Lochte will be summoned to Rio for hearing. But he says he's probably not gonna go. His ears work pretty good already.
  3. I had such a massive hangover this morning, I just stood in the shower for nearly an hour... Then I summoned the strength to turn it on.
  4. Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. When you over hear a conversation and aren't sure if they're reading from the Bible or quoting Thanos.
  5. The recommended age to have a Ouija Board is 8+ years old. So, you need to be 21 years old to drink alcohol and 8 to summon the devil.
  6. I always get interrupted whenever I'm playing the Air Harp By people asking why I've summoned them over.
  7. After the Satanic being I summoned killed a bunch of people, everyone said it was evil But I told them thats just how it was raised
  8. The other day I found out my necronomicon had typos but atleast now I know how to summon santa
  9. Do girls actually enjoy being fingered or is that a myth? Depends if you know the difference between summoning a genie and stuffing a chicken.
  10. I was playing Words with Fiends I scored 50 points for using all my runes, but summoned Pazuzu.

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Summons One Liners

Which summons one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with summons? I can suggest the ones about beckons and muster.

  1. What do you call a Jewish magician who only summons furniture? Bench Appearo.
  2. An inverse exorcism... When you have to summon Satan to get the priest out of the boy.
  3. I got a court summons along with my cocktail It was a subpoena colada
  4. A dislexic cultist tried to summon satan. He was told he was on the naughty list.
  5. What did the Cult of the Train summon? Choochoolu
  6. What do you call a black man that summons the dead? A Nergomancer
  7. A pop star who summons ghosts, AKA... Seancé
  8. How does a Conservative wizard summon a bench? Bensh Apiro
  9. I like Twisted Treeline more than Summoner's Rift I get flamed by 2 people instead of 4
  10. Why did Naruto drop a bag of change? To prepare for his summoning jew-tsu.
  11. what do you call a cult gathering summoning an old one with the boys
  12. Got a summons for jury duty. At least now I know it will be a hung jury.
  13. How do you summon a wizard taxi? CABRACADABRA!
  14. Look I can summon Australians Have you ever, ever felt like this?
  15. What do you call a gym that League of Legends players go to? Summoner's Lift.

Summons joke, What do you call a gym that League of Legends players go to?

Make fun with this list of one liners, jokes and riddles. Each joke is crafted with thought and creativity, delivering punchlines that are unexpected and witty. The humor about summons can easily lighten the mood and bring smiles to people's faces. This compilation of summons puns is not just entertaining but also a testament to the art of joke-telling. The jokes in this list are designed to display different humor styles, ensuring that every reader at any age finds something entertaining. Constantly updated, they offer a source of fun that ensures one is always smiling !

Cheerful Summons Jokes for Unforgettable Laughter with Friends!

What funny jokes about summons you can tell and make people laugh? One example I can give are clean sends jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help make summons prank.

A police officer pulls a guy over.....

and the driver rolls down his window and asks why he is being pulled over. The cop explains that he didn't completely stop at the stop sign. The driver says: I slowed down and took a look. The cop grabs him through the window, pulls his head out, and starts slapping him in the face with his summons book repeatedly. After about twenty slaps, the cop asks him:
Do you want me to stop or slow down?

A European m**... goes to an African tribe...

... and asks the tribeleader if he may stay with them. The leader agrees on one condition: No white child can be born.
However, 9 months later, a woman is discovered with a white child.
The leader summons the missonary to explain himself. The m**... looks out the window and shows the leader a herd of sheep and says:
" As you can see, all the sheep are white, yet one of them is black... "
In complete distress, the tribeleader exclaims: " Allright, I won't say anything about your child, as long as you don't say anything about the sheep!"

10-inch BIC

Two guys are out fishing on a boat when one of them wants to have a smoke.
1: You got a lighter?
2: Yes. *pulls out a 10 inch long BIC lighter*
1: Woah, where'd you get that!?
2: I have a personal genie.
1: Cool! Can I make a wish?
2: Sure, just be very clear, he's a bit hard of hearing. *Summons genie*
1: I wish for a million bucks!
*The genie snaps his fingers and a million ducks fly overhead.*
1: Wow, your genie really s**... at hearing.
2: I know, do you really think I asked for a 10 inch BIC?

Putin summons the ghost of Stalin.

"Why is everything here so bad? What can I do to make Russia great again?"
"Execute half of the population, and paint the Kremlin blue" advises Stalin.
"Why blue?" asks the inquisitive Putin.
"I knew you wouldn't object to the first part," says Stalin.

An albino child in an African tribe...

This puts the tribe's chief in a fury and immediatly summons the white m**... that was sent by the Church in his village.
Chief: "Explain the white kid, white man!"
Priest: "Well, you see, a white child amongst your black tribe is... like the black lamb that was recently born in your herd of white sheep, they..."
Chief, interrupting: "If... if you keep quiet about the black lamb, I'll keep quiet about the child."

A King asks two guards to protect his beautiful daughter's virginity...

Unbeknownst to the guards, the king put a trap in his daughter's nether regions.
The next day, the king summons the guards and one showed up with mangled g**.... The King had him executed for making attempts on his daughter.
The other guard, with his manhood intact was offered a promotion for upholding abstinence, to which he replied "hnnnggg"

A man summons a genie from a lamp

The genie says he'll grant 3 wishes.The man's first wish is for infinite wishes.Well the genie tells the man that he can't wish for more wishes.So the man wishes for an umbrella.The genie does so and then ask Why do you need an umbrella? .The man then says Now shove it up your a**... . With a painful groan the genie does so.He then says Okay w**...,what next? . The man then says Now give me more wishes before I make you open the umbrella

The conscript receives a summons to the army

He is afraid, so he says to his friend:
\- Knock out all my teeth, then they won't take me into the army!
A friend knocks out his teeth, as he asks.
The next day they meet again.
A friend asks him:
\- How are you?
The conscript replies, lisping terribly:
\- Everything is great! They didn't take me, the doctor said I have flat feet!

How to one lady got out of a speeding ticket.

The Policeman recently stopped a woman for exceeding the posted speed limit. He asked the driver her name.

She said, "I'm Mrs. Ladislav Abdulkhashim Zybkcicraznovskaya from the Republic of Uzbekistan visiting my daughter in Tallahassee."

The cop put away his summons book and pen, and said, "Well... OK... but don't let me catch you speeding again."

A Fairy Tale

After his daughter is cursed by the dark fairy, Maleficent, King Stefan summons his royal carpenters and commands them to make the finest, most comfortable bed in all the land.
"It will be done, Your Majesty," replies the master builder. "Does His Majesty prefer a queen or a king?"
"A king, since you asked," whispers Stefan, "…but don't tell that to the queen!"

A man summons his nurse in the recovery room

He pulls her close and asks Are my t**... black?
The nurse, is somewhat taken aback but lifts the bedsheets to check, moves some stuff around and says No.
A while later the nurse comes back in and is again asked can you please check and see if my t**... are black?
Again the nurse lifts the bedsheets and fumbles around a bid and reports that they are just fine and not to worry.
The man pulls her closer, clears his t**... and repeats slowly I said please check and see if my test results are back!

Summons joke, A man summons his nurse in the recovery room

Jokes are a form of humor that often involves clever wordplay, puns or unexpected twists in a story. These are usually short narratives or anecdotes crafted with the intent of amusing its audience by ending in an unexpected or humorous punchline. Jokes are a universal form of entertainment that people of all ages like adults, teens, kids and toddlers can enjoy. JokoJokes' FAQ section has answers to questions you may have!

The impact of these summons jokes can be both social and psychological. They can help to ease tensions, create bonds between people, and even improve overall mental health. The success of a joke often relies on the delivery, timing, and audience. Jokes can be used in various settings, from social gatherings to professional presentations, and are often employed to lighten the mood or enhance a story.