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Suited Jokes

31 suited jokes and hilarious suited puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about suited that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

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Funniest Suited Short Jokes

Short suited jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The suited humour may include short suitable jokes also.

  1. In 50 years: "You know, kids, back in my day, we had to wear masks everywhere we went at one point." We didn't have those fancy hazmat suit you all wear today
  2. My daughter's skirt was getting a lot of attention as I walked her to the school gates, which made me very uncomfortable. To be honest, I thought it suited me.
  3. A young man robbed a bank wearing a suit made of many mirrors But he turned himself in after taking some time to reflect.
    Luckily the judge was lenient as he saw a lot of himself in the young man.
  4. Regretting the compliment... A woman walks up to a guy in a blue bathing suit and says, "Did you know your eyes match your swim trunks?" He says, "Really! Why? Are my eyes bulging?"
  5. A man walks into a tailor to buy a tuxedo. He confidently tells the tailor he doesn't need any assistance. The tailor says… ... "Fine. Suit yourself."
  6. Doctor: describe your average night Patient: they wear suits of armor
    Doctor: no, i mean at bed time
    Patient: they probably take it off
  7. "What is your biggest weakness?" asked the interviewer. I said, "Spiders."
    He said, "Professional ones?"
    I said, "I don't know, I've never seen one in a suit before."
  8. Superman once went to a party. Some people wore bitcoin suits, other dogecoin. Superman was upset, no one told him it was a crypto night.
  9. Why is Christmas just like your job? You do all the work and the fat guy with the suit gets all the credit.
  10. I was walking down the road and a man offered me a free sofa and chairs. I said no because my mother always told me not to accept suites from strangers.

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Suited One Liners

Which suited one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with suited? I can suggest the ones about fitted and suits.

  1. Who wears a red suit and knows if you were naughty or nice? The spanish Inquisition.
  2. What happens when Catwoman takes off her suit? The Dark Knight Rises!
  3. Vader has a pretty sweet suit. It must have cost at least an arm and a leg.
  4. To the guy in the wheelchair that stole my camo suit. You can hide but you cant run.
  5. I told my tailor I wouldn't be needing his services anymore He said "Fine, suit yourself"
  6. Apparently Iron Man also did a tuxedo range... But it wasn't his strong suit
  7. What did the tailor say to the fed up customer? Suit yourself.
  8. What did the Superhero wear to Court? His Class Action Suit
  9. What do you call dora the Explorer in an Iron Man suit? FeDora
    I'll see myself out.
  10. What do you call a snakeskin suit? A Hissy Fit
  11. A girl complimented me AFTER I took off my mask She said the mask suits you
  12. Donald Trump's lawsuits are like his regular suits, They all hang on something useless.
  13. What do you call a woman in an Iron Man suit? Fe-Male
  14. What is space like without a space suit? Breathtaking
  15. What do you call an african american in a 3 piece suit? The defendant.

Suited joke, What do you call an african american in a 3 piece suit?

Comical & Quirky Suited Jokes for a Roaring Good Time

What funny jokes about suited you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean suit fitting jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make suited pranks.

I'm not having much luck with jobs lately.

I couldn't concentrate in the orange juice factory; wasn't suited to be a tailor; the muffler factory was just exhausting; couldn't cut it as barber; didn't have the patience to be a doctor; didn't fit in the shoe factory; pool maintenance was too draining and I just couldn't see any future as a historian.

I'm not having much luck with jobs lately.

I wasn't suited to be a tailor.
The muffler factory was just exhausting.
I couldn't cut it as a barber.
I didn't have the patience to be a doctor.
I wasn't a good fit in the shoe factory even though I put my soul into it.
The paper shop folded. Pool maintenance was too draining.
I got fired from the cannon factory.
And I just couldn't see any future as a historian.

So Putin decides to change Russia's Identity

He calls the Queen of Great Britain for advice.
Putin - "Queen Elizabeth, I'd like to have Russia be a Kingdom. I feel it would give it the gravitas it deserves"
The Queen - "But Vladimir, you need to have a king to be a Kingdom"
Putin - "Well what about a Principality then?"
The Queen - "No Vladimir, you need a prince to have a Principality"
Putin - "Then I'm at a loss, what should Russia be"
The Queen - "I think you are quite suited to be a Country, wouldn't you agree"

Whenever I feel depressed in life.. I open my E-Mail spam inbox

I find:
* 10 banks are giving me easy loans.
* I have won GBP 10000000 and USD 500000 for unknown reasons.
* 10 Job companies have best jobs for me.
* 5 matrimonial sites have most suited matches for me.
* Dr. Batra has claimed that he will cure my hair fall.
* 3 universities are giving me degrees in random subjects.
* And Approx 40-50 mails from different girls who are feeling lonely and want to meet me.

My daughter's skirt was getting a lot of attention as I walked her to the school gates, which made me very uneasy.

If I'm being honest, I thought it really suited me.

I don't like Muslin Afghans and think people should stone them.

A good stonewash can make muslin fabric softer and more flexible which is better suited for afghans and blankets in general, otherwise just go with a soft acrylic yarn.

I used to work at an orange juice factory but was fired because I couldn't concentrate.

So I tried my hand at being a lumberjack. I couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe.
Then i gave being a barber a go. But I didn't cut it.
I was then hired as a tailor and found I wasn't suited for the job.

Alexa for President!

I asked Alexa if she was considering running for President, but she said she was better suited for Speaker of the House.

When I was a kid I took an aptitude test...

It said I was best suited to become a bartender and all I could think was, "Well that's one way to see my dad!"

Why are gametes best suited to advertising careers?

Because s**... cells.

What job are rude epileptics well suited for?

Salt shakers.

Have you ever heard of the paralysed man who aspired to become a stand-up comedian?

He figured sitcoms suited him better.

Which parts of a laptop are best suited for laying siege?

The battery and ram.

What job is best suited for a dog?



Roofing.

I wanted to see if I was suited for the job at the funnel factory, they said I wasn't

Funnily enough

Suited joke, I wanted to see if I was suited for the job at the funnel factory, they said I wasn't